✍️3000 Days of Happiness, 5000 Days of Regret || Review
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REVIEWER'S NOTES | Hello ^^ I hope you liked the review. I've tried my best in making my decisions. Feel free to contact if you have any doubt.
TITLE (004/005)
The title has slight relevance with the chapters as they both displayed the days and numbers. You've brought in the mood just by the title which shows that regret stays longer than happiness, angst already! Good work on that. Even though it not very catchy, it has a lot of angst in it. Nice! If you could make the title shorter but more catchy, it would rock. It's not unique but it brings the mood in.
DESCRIPTION/FOREWORD (006/010)
According to my view, if the description could be made shorter, it would be better. Normally descriptions are attractive when shorter. When it's short, the readers feel to give it a shot. If it is a new story to them, they wouldn't bother reading the long paragraph. The vocabulary and the word usage is really good, perfect! But it's too long, which makes it less captivating. Make it sweet but short. Get the readers eye even if it is for a second. The expressions and angst is really good and you've described it gloriously.
Bringing in Woozi's Part Of View (P.O.V) was a good shift. The distress shift. The one confusion which striked me was, description says Woozi is leading a content life but the P.O.V shows that he misses her, which brings in an uncomfortable contradiction. Also, you have revealed almost the whole basic plot in the description itself. Woozi and Younghee meets, they break up, feel lonely and they meet again. There is no suspense. If you cut the part where they meet again, the readers wouldn't expect when they read it. Description is just to bring in the mood, the beauty and the situation you are talking in. The words you've used and the flow was beautiful. It was clean but just too long.
CHARACTERIZATION (020/020)
The way you introduced and brought in your characters was more than perfect! Every character has their own role and their character is described well. It brings the reader into the total understanding who they are. Hoshi, S.Coups, Vernon, Younghee and Woozi have different characters, also very relatable. Their personalities are the same throughout the story. How each of them met and how each of them are close in a different way, was also interesting. So, in short, you've done a very good job. A helpless Woozi, A helping Hoshi, A crazy Vernon and an Annoying yet Lovable S.Coups. The first chapter shows a sweet Jihoon, a lover who wants to help himself and his lover. He tries to adjust unlike his lover. In the 1st chapter itself you've brought in the character's roles come out well.
PLOT (009/020)
The plot was almost revealed in the description already, so there is something that the readers anticipate already, they WILL meet. Also, the way you made a conversation betweeen Younghee and Woozi, was way formal yet sweet. I've not heard any person talk to their lovers with Poetic forms of speech. However angsty or however sincere, the conversations seemed to formal, sometimes. You brought in the mood, AMAZINGLY! A friendly Seventeen was a good start for the present. Also you jumped the chapters from past, present, past, present. That's new and nice. You've done a nice job in a angsty start. Playing with the days, was also quite nice. From the 4th Chapter, I would like to say, things were quite unnecessary. The discussion when they had in the school, was very long. People may skip it. I am not telling everyone would do the same, some may find it interesting. But. if you could reduce that part it would be nice. Also, that is first time I ever heard a discussion like that. Normally we play around and not even bother about it. So, making it reader-friendly would help. Quite Formal, again, and complicated. Normal readers, or beginners may not understand your vocabulary. But the flow was beautiful and gorgeous. I am just telling that, if you make the words a little more simpler, more people would find it pleasing to read. If the endings of the chapters were tempting or abrupt, will make the reader to continue for the next chapter. You could try doing so, in the future chapters. Somtimes. I felt it was way too dramatic than how normal people would converse. His birthday, the part where Vernon reminds him of his birthday was very relatable as it shows his very hectic and busy life. The meeting and talking at Vernon's place was not that important and it wouldn't want people to continue reading. It gave light to his depression, but it is already known that he is and he is a very busy person. Repeating it over again is not necessary. You could have adjusted the 5th chapter in the 6th chapter. Instead of giving a whole chapter for a birthday. The 6th chapter again, you described Woozi's very hopless situation and depression instead of giving something more nice to read. It's sad, sad, sad and a normal life ending. It needn't be that long. So, concluding, there were a lot of 'not-so-needed' situations.
WRITING STYLE (020/020)
Really, your writing style is BOMB! It was beautiful, amazing, elegant, with the flow, special, JUST THE BEST! There are enough descriptions everywhere. I really respect your vocabulary and your 'immense maniipulation of words'. It was really good. No kidding! We can easiily visualize the scenes and there were no overused words. It was emotion grabbbing and just perfect. With the flow, made it even more elegant. NO gramar mistakes, no breaks and no errors.
GRAMMER (016/020)
Sometimes I felt your word choices were too fancy and not that appropriate. The correct words were used and no mistakes at all, for spelling, punctuations or grammar. But if you could simplify it a bit so it would be reader-friendly, everybody would enjoy your story. As most readers will not know the meanings of the complicated words you used. I am not saying it's bad, it's JJANG. But, simplifying it would attain you more susbcribers.
PERSONAL ENJOYMENT (002/005)
Personally, I found some places quite unnecessary and not important, also too formal, which was not interesting to me. But I really enjoyed your vocabulary and use of words. As I told above, 'reader-friendly' would make it better.
The title has slight relevance with the chapters as they both displayed the days and numbers. You've brought in the mood just by the title which shows that regret stays longer than happiness, angst already! Good work on that. Even though it not very catchy, it has a lot of angst in it. Nice! If you could make the title shorter but more catchy, it would rock. It's not unique but it brings the mood in.
DESCRIPTION/FOREWORD (006/010)
According to my view, if the description could be made shorter, it would be better. Normally descriptions are attractive when shorter. When it's short, the readers feel to give it a shot. If it is a new story to them, they wouldn't bother reading the long paragraph. The vocabulary and the word usage is really good, perfect! But it's too long, which makes it less captivating. Make it sweet but short. Get the readers eye even if it is for a second. The expressions and angst is really good and you've described it gloriously.
Bringing in Woozi's Part Of View (P.O.V) was a good shift. The distress shift. The one confusion which striked me was, description says Woozi is leading a content life but the P.O.V shows that he misses her, which brings in an uncomfortable contradiction. Also, you have revealed almost the whole basic plot in the description itself. Woozi and Younghee meets, they break up, feel lonely and they meet again. There is no suspense. If you cut the part where they meet again, the readers wouldn't expect when they read it. Description is just to bring in the mood, the beauty and the situation you are talking in. The words you've used and the flow was beautiful. It was clean but just too long.
CHARACTERIZATION (020/020)
The way you introduced and brought in your characters was more than perfect! Every character has their own role and their character is described well. It brings the reader into the total understanding who they are. Hoshi, S.Coups, Vernon, Younghee and Woozi have different characters, also very relatable. Their personalities are the same throughout the story. How each of them met and how each of them are close in a different way, was also interesting. So, in short, you've done a very good job. A helpless Woozi, A helping Hoshi, A crazy Vernon and an Annoying yet Lovable S.Coups. The first chapter shows a sweet Jihoon, a lover who wants to help himself and his lover. He tries to adjust unlike his lover. In the 1st chapter itself you've brought in the character's roles come out well.
PLOT (009/020)
The plot was almost revealed in the description already, so there is something that the readers anticipate already, they WILL meet. Also, the way you made a conversation betweeen Younghee and Woozi, was way formal yet sweet. I've not heard any person talk to their lovers with Poetic forms of speech. However angsty or however sincere, the conversations seemed to formal, sometimes. You brought in the mood, AMAZINGLY! A friendly Seventeen was a good start for the present. Also you jumped the chapters from past, present, past, present. That's new and nice. You've done a nice job in a angsty start. Playing with the days, was also quite nice. From the 4th Chapter, I would like to say, things were quite unnecessary. The discussion when they had in the school, was very long. People may skip it. I am not telling everyone would do the same, some may find it interesting. But. if you could reduce that part it would be nice. Also, that is first time I ever heard a discussion like that. Normally we play around and not even bother about it. So, making it reader-friendly would help. Quite Formal, again, and complicated. Normal readers, or beginners may not understand your vocabulary. But the flow was beautiful and gorgeous. I am just telling that, if you make the words a little more simpler, more people would find it pleasing to read. If the endings of the chapters were tempting or abrupt, will make the reader to continue for the next chapter. You could try doing so, in the future chapters. Somtimes. I felt it was way too dramatic than how normal people would converse. His birthday, the part where Vernon reminds him of his birthday was very relatable as it shows his very hectic and busy life. The meeting and talking at Vernon's place was not that important and it wouldn't want people to continue reading. It gave light to his depression, but it is already known that he is and he is a very busy person. Repeating it over again is not necessary. You could have adjusted the 5th chapter in the 6th chapter. Instead of giving a whole chapter for a birthday. The 6th chapter again, you described Woozi's very hopless situation and depression instead of giving something more nice to read. It's sad, sad, sad and a normal life ending. It needn't be that long. So, concluding, there were a lot of 'not-so-needed' situations.
WRITING STYLE (020/020)
Really, your writing style is BOMB! It was beautiful, amazing, elegant, with the flow, special, JUST THE BEST! There are enough descriptions everywhere. I really respect your vocabulary and your 'immense maniipulation of words'. It was really good. No kidding! We can easiily visualize the scenes and there were no overused words. It was emotion grabbbing and just perfect. With the flow, made it even more elegant. NO gramar mistakes, no breaks and no errors.
GRAMMER (016/020)
Sometimes I felt your word choices were too fancy and not that appropriate. The correct words were used and no mistakes at all, for spelling, punctuations or grammar. But if you could simplify it a bit so it would be reader-friendly, everybody would enjoy your story. As most readers will not know the meanings of the complicated words you used. I am not saying it's bad, it's JJANG. But, simplifying it would attain you more susbcribers.
PERSONAL ENJOYMENT (002/005)
Personally, I found some places quite unnecessary and not important, also too formal, which was not interesting to me. But I really enjoyed your vocabulary and use of words. As I told above, 'reader-friendly' would make it better.
TOTAL SCORE (077/100)
REVIEWER'S ADVICE:
Using simpler vocabulary and making the scenes more funnier, or interesting, which will give light to something which the readers have not known, will work well. Keep the flow and do your best. Think about how everyone can enjoy your story and think about bringing in creative situations. Feel free to PM me, if you need any help ^^ Hope it helped!
Indiankpopelsa <3
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