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Chapter 37

The sound on tiny feet could only be heard in one room that morning, but yet it hadn’t alerted the person he wanted  the most, that he was up and wanted his full attention. “U-ummma….”  He called out no answer he tried to peak over the side of the bed but it was a lot taller than his own. “Umma…. He called again but this time he caught the attention of his father who looked to Jaejoong before turning back to his son. Yunho rolled off the side of the bed walking to Karam. Yunho bent down to his level.

“Umma still sleeping…?” He asked as Yunho kissed him.

“Yeah,’ Yunho smiled at his soon, “Umma still sleeping, how about we let Umma sleep a little longer…and surprise him with breakfast, how does that sound to you little man!” Yunho told him holding out his hand for Karam to take,

“Appa make breakfast…. Karam cuddle with Umma, Umma looks sad,” Yunho had to give it to his son he could always pick up on these things even if he hasn’t meet for him too,

“But Umma would like Karam to eat breakfast first, right?” it took Karam a minute to take hold his father hand looking back not once but twice as his father lead him out of the room.

“Karam can cuddle with Umma later… right.

“Course you can I’m sure Umma would like that.”

****

The sun was coming in through a crack in the curtain, a concentrated beam shining brightly onto a figure, he groaned as he cracked open his eye for a second before rolling over on to his back which seem to be the worst mistake he could have down a wave of nausea struck him. “So bright.” He spoke out as he slung his hand over his eyes, his head ached terrible, His stomach hurt badly He looked around and widened her eyes. “How did he get home...?” He knew he drank last night the taste lingered on his tongue only making him feel worst that he should have.  He tried to sit up but all that cause was for his to scramble to the bathroom to empty his stomach, as much as it burned when he drank it down, it burned so much more coming back up. What processed him to drink so much, he couldn’t remember his mind was a complete blank.

He lay his head against his arm on the toilet, his hair mangled to the side of his face, how much had he drunk last night, everything became a blur. A liquid filled stomach came up so quickly but what was worse was the dry retching hurting his throat more. Jaejoong concentrate on taking every breath to keep the awfully feeling in his stomach far from his mind. He hadn’t drunk like that in so long, hadn’t planned to ever again…..and he knew why yet that was a memory he never wanted to repeat in his mind, he tried to get up when he felt like he was done but dizzies struck. He lay on the tiles of the bathroom floor his eyes closed and he home for it to pass.

“Head concussion and Alcohol poisoning… we had to pump his stomach when he was brought it,’ It was like a distant memory, he remembers the conversation from afar, the words travelled into his mind. His father’s voice. ‘I don’t know what I can to do stop him.

‘If he’s not careful he could really damage his liver if he hasn’t already, underage drink could have serious impacts on his health.

‘I don’t know how to get him to stop….’ His father voice how he missed the sound of it. “We found this on his persons.” Jaejoong knew his father must have been ashamed,

“A fake ID….’

“I suggest you really have a talk with your son…. I won’t be reporting it to the police this time but the next time I will have too.”

‘Thank you, doctor….’

The next thing Jaejoong felt was someone brushing the hair from his face as he lay in a daze, “Why do you keep doing this to yourself.” His felt his father warm hand. “I want you to be happy… not this….

“I know I’m not the best Father but I am trying my best to provide for you…. So, you have everything you ever need… don’t you see that.’

‘all I wanted was you’re love…. for you to spent time with me.” Jaejoong was taken from his thought we he felt   someone arm he turned opening his eyes to see Yunho, but the second his body moved he hunched over the toilet bowl. After a half an hour of dry reaching, his stomach muscles sore from the violent vomiting did he find it stopped. Yunho kneed behind him rubbing his back the inter time. ‘I don’t feel so good.” Jaejoong mumbled as he got to his feet, his face flush eye swollen red, He swayed a little but Yunho was there to keep him steady. Jaejoong couldn’t remember if Yunho spoke to him or not as he helped him back to bed forcing him to lie down,

Just sleep it will help….,” Jaejoong heard none of it, but did feel Yunho hand moving from giving Jaejoong hand a squeeze to brushing his cheek to his hair and running his fingers through the black strands. Jaejoong blinked a few more time until he couldn’t keep his eyes open and fell back asleep with Yunho beside him.

A few hours later and Yunho wasn’t alone in the room, Karam was very insistent on staying in the room, Yunho had to tell him Umma wasn’t feeling well and the best thing he could do was stay quiet.

“Yunho….” A soft whisper crosses to his ears, Yunho glanced to the door to see his mother, he walked over to her, “Why don’t you take Karam out for a while some fresh air would do him some good maybe go pick up your car….”

‘I want to be here for Jaejoong’

‘I know that but he’s fine just a hangover he need to sleep off, I know you want to talk to him about yesterday, but just remember to give him space if he needs it.’ She looked into the room, to her Jaejoong looked green, the thought had cross her mind on how much he drank but as much as she knew drinking wasn’t the answer she felt Jaejoong must have been in such pain to get to the point of beating himself up inside for him to drink so much. ‘Go on I’ll watch over him…

****

He stirred from his sound asleep, it was quiet in this room the satin sheet against his skin curled around his frame. The pillow beneath his head, nursing his acting head. He felt slightly better, but his breath tasted horrible his mouth dry, he sat up looking to the alarm clock it was half two in the day, he cursed lightly under her breath. He got out of bed heading to the bathroom brushing his teeth was the first thing on his mind. He looked in the mirror and instantly remember the night, why he was drinking and how it all started. He felt awful…. He stood looking at himself for a good ten-minute contemplating his thought but in the end Jaejoong only have two choices to think about.

‘Should I stay or should I go…?’

 ‘can you go on feeling like this? knowing you’ll never be good enough,’ he asked himself, all he needed to do was make the right choice but that was harder than it looked this wasn’t just about Yunho and himself he hand to consider Karam aswell. He loved Yunho and Karam so much, but there were many times it had been difficult were he put on a brave face and put it to the back of his mind. But what else could he do but expect it. “You’re so weak…. He stood under the shower taking into action the result of yesterday, which was his own fault and he knew he shouldn’t turn to drink. ‘I’m not strong enough for all this….,’ he leaned his head against the shower wall. “What do I do?’

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 What will Jaejoong decide..... any guesses... I'm have an ieda i'm thinking about it ^_^

I think i'll use that hope you enjoy

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