Chapter 29

The weight of a decision

I somehow wrote over half of this today, I'm still not sure how this happened... anyway, we're approaching the end, only one more chapter and an epilogue in this story to go. Enjoy!

 

Seungri's eyes opened with a start. It was still dark outside, so he wasn't quite sure why he was awake. Looking at his phone quickly - and hissing as the brightness stung his eyes - he checked the time. It was 4am. Why was he awake then? And why did he have a vague feeling of unease.

Looking around the room, and letting his sleepy brain absorb the fact that he was still in the parallel universe, he realised what it was. This was his last day. There was nothing he could do about it, not now, not during the rest of the day.

He lay back down slowly, and tried to get back to sleep. He began to feel a worry that he hadn't felt yesterday, one which caused vague anxiety. What if he couldn't do everything today? Tossing over in bed, he did his best to shut these thoughts out. He definitely wouldn't be able to use his time wisely if he was too tired to function.

**

Seungri could hear the members leaving from his bed - in fact, it was the front door banging that woke him up in the first place. He rolled over and thought about going back to sleep, but he knew he'd be able to do plenty of that tomorrow from the comfort of his bed back in his universe.

He reluctantly heaved himself out of bed, and got dressed comfortably - he had no intention of going outside today, he'd done enough of that yesterday.

He shuffled out into the kitchen, hoping there would be at least one person out there to keep him company for the day. He swore he could hear faint noises coming from there, but he was still half asleep so he wasn't sure whether it was just his imagination. The sound of his footsteps was loud in his ears, and he was glad that he wouldn't be disturbing anyone since he was sure that they were all up.

Jonghyun was the one stood in the kitchen, and it looked as though he'd got out every single pot that they had - Seungri had no idea what he was trying to make with all that, especially since it was - he squinted at his phone screen - 10am, still breakfast time.

Seungri couldn't be bothered to eat yet, so he lay down on the sofa and waited for Jonghyun to be done with whatever he was doing. Without even realising it, he had begun to fall asleep again, and was only woken up by the sofa dipping when Jonghyun sat next to him.

Seungri stayed napping until he felt Jonghyun shake his legs. "What?" He mumbled.

"Seungri... are you awake?" He heard Jonghyun ask. Seungri rubbed his eyes in an attempt to stay awake, and nodded. He then realised that there was someone else he should tell about this being his last day - the man sat in front of him.

"Hyung... there's something I should tell you," he began.

Jonghyun's expression went from playful to concerned in a second flat. "What is it?"

"I... I had a dream last night." He looked around, realising that any one of the members could come back at any time and hear them talking about this. "I need to talk to you about it in my room." He stood up, and let Jonghyun follow him into his room.

"Hyung... this is my last day here. I won't be able to see you after this." Seungri watched Jonghyun carefully to see his reaction. He seemed resigned - at least, he didn't seem too upset about it.

Seungri laughed as Jonghyun flopped down on his bed. "So you really mean it? This is it?" Jonghyun asked.

Seungri nodded. "If my dream was real, then yeah, this should be it."

"Wow... So tomorrow it won't be... you?" Jonghyun laughed. "I shouldn't be so shocked, most of the time you've been here I didn't even know it was you and not Seunghyun I was talking to."

"I hope you don't miss me too much," Seungri grinned.

"Nah, I'll just be glad to have the real Seunghyun back," Jonghyun fired right back. Seungri laughed, and sat down next to Jonghyun. "So... I guess I'll never have the chance to learn about your world after this?"

"I suppose that's true, yes. But what more could you want to know?" Seungri tried to think of what he might have left out of the explanation he'd given before.

"Well I still don't know the exact circumstances of how your group got big. You say that you're a successful idol group, but I really still don't see how someone like G-Dragon could be in an idol group."

"Oh, right... I forgot I hadn't told you." Seungri laughed. "Um... well you're right, in a way, Jiyong hyung really wasn't happy about it at the start. You should have heard him when he found out he was going to have to be in a group with us, he was livid, I thought he hated me for a good few months."

"Really? So it wasn't always so good? I thought you said that you were like, the biggest group?" Jonghyun seemed genuinely surprised.

"Well, no, but we warmed up to each other eventually." A flash of inspiration hit Seungri. He dug his phone out, and flicked through his camera roll. There weren't many old photos on there - they'd been a group for nearly ten years, he'd had several phones since then - but he'd kept some of their old group selcas. Despite internally cringing at his young face, he showed Jonghyun the photos.

Jonghyun leaned in close to get a good look. "Huh... I remember you looking this young when we were trainees, you've no idea how weird it is to see you with other people looking like that." Seungri flicked forward in his camera roll. He had a picture of them on stage from their debut in their stupid 'La la la' outfits. Jonghyun laughed at them - he was right, Seungri had no idea what the stylists were thinking when they put the group in that, but it still brought up feelings of nostalgia for the old days.

"I know, I know, it looks so bad." Seungri put his phone away. "Anyway, I swear Jiyong hyung must be a genius songwriter in every universe, because he's just as successful in my universe as he is here. Believe it or not, he's capable of writing more than just raps." Jonghyun laughed.

"I bet he is," Jonghyun replied condescendingly.

"You're on," Seungri challenged, going to the music on his phone and getting to the Bigbang section - it wasn't narcissistic to listen to your own music in your free time, right? Picking a song, he prepared to blow Jonghyun's mind with the amazingness that was Bigbang's music - and even more importantly, if Jonghyun got any of these songs stuck in his head, there would be no way for him to listen to them after today. Seungri only felt a little bit evil for doing it.

**

Seungri leaned against Jonghyun heavier. He was still tired from this morning, and after his talk with Jonghyun he was feeling a bit drained. The sofa was comfy, and so was Jonghyun's side (although he doubted that Jonghyun was feeling as comfortable as he was about it, he could feel his shoulder digging into Jonghyun's arm).

Despite his lethargy, he was still able to have energy when he needed to. "TAE!" Seungri shouted as he noticed Taemin walk in the door - finally, he was beginning to worry that he wouldn't turn up, and he wouldn't get to say goodbye at all. That would have been more sad than any other person he had to say goodbye to here, he'd got attached to this version of Taemin much more than the version from his world.

Taemin froze. "Yes?" He looked extremely confused, which, Seungri realised, he was beginning to find cute.

Without saying anything more - after all, he couldn't really explain his eagerness to talk to him at this very moment - he crossed the room and enveloped Taemin in a hug. Taemin stumbled slightly, but wrapped his arms around Seungri in return. "What's this for?" He laughed.

"Uh..." Seungri loosened his hold on Taemin. "I missed you?"

"You saw me yesterday, how could you be missing me?" His words complained, but Taemin's arms tightened around him in response.

Giving Taemin one more squeeze, Seungri let go. "I always miss you!" He exclaimed. He would definitely miss Taemin when he couldn't see him any more - it technically wasn't a lie.

Seungri turned back towards the sofa where Jonghyun was still sat, and dragged Taemin back over. For a second Seungri thought he saw a look of... something odd crossing Jonghyun's face, but it was gone so quickly that he couldn't be sure.

Dismissing that, Seungri sat Taemin down next to him. Taemin seemed to be enjoying the attention, and Seungri was just glad that he was going to get to spend this last time with him, even if Taemin was unaware of it.

As the three of them sat there and watched the tv, gradually the others came and joined them as they arrived home. None of them received the same warm welcome that he'd given Taemin, but that didn't mean he wasn't happy to see them; he would have felt disappointed had he been unable to say goodbye to any of them.

They ended up all huddled against each other, keeping each other warm and drowsy in their nest of blankets and pillows. Seungri couldn't believe that he'd kept being so tired all day, but it seemed as though everyone else was feeling just as sleepy.

As it began to get genuinely late, Minho broke the sleepy silence by announcing that he was going to bed. In that moment, it really hit Seungri that he would probably never see these people again. Despite it going against every instinct in his body, he managed to jump up and hug Minho, who seemed just as surprised as Taemin had been to receive such an enthusiastic hug. "I'm only going to bed, I'll see you tomorrow," Minho laughed, patting Seungri's back.

"Where's mine?" Jinki jokingly called from under his 20 or so blankets. Turning back around, Seungri saw that the others had woken up a bit by him getting up - but it wouldn't stop each of them being hugged by him.

Despite the fact that Jinki was joking - probably - Seungri decided that he should go to bed, and that meant saying goodnight/goodbye to the members. Bounding back over, he flopped down on top of Jinki and hugged him. Perhaps this wasn't what Jinki wanted but damnit that was what he was getting. Jinki seemed to be having a little difficulty breathing, but Seungri couldn't be sure whether that was due to his weight or the fact that Jinki was laughing hysterically.

One by one, each of the members were given the same treatment, each of them seeming to enjoy it. Seungri ended up spending a little longer hugging Jonghyun, due to him refusing to let go. Seungri felt sorry for him, that at this moment they couldn't do the goodbye that they might have wanted, but there was no way to do that without arousing suspicion, and so they had to content themselves with a long hug.

As Seungri finally managed to detangle his legs from where Jonghyun had wrapped his own around Seungri's, he thought he saw something like a tear glistening in Jonghyun's eye - maybe he was upset about him leaving after all. He paused for a second, unsure of whether he should do something about it, but seeing Jonghyun shake his head almost imperceptibly made him continue getting to his feet.

With a heavy heart he made his way to his room, waving for a last time as he did so. After he rounded the corner and was no longer in their sight, he leant against the wall for a second, wondering whether he should be spending longer with them while he could. Sighing, he continued walking to his room - he'd already said his goodbyes, there was nothing more that he could do.

It was only really at this moment that he fully saw how attached he'd become to these people - it was amazing how living in close quarters with people for just a few months could bond you together. Seungri was almost jealous of the Seungri from this universe - he'd not give up being part of Bigbang for anything, but it seemed as though the other Seungri had a good life here.

He took one last look at 'his' room here. It had become familiar and comforting to him in his short time here, despite holding the memories and personality of a man who was not him.

With another sigh, he got into bed, knowing that when he woke up, he wouldn't be able to come back here again - there would be no more worrying about when he might next wake up here, since it would be never.

He listened to the sounds of the other members moving around in the living room, trying to memorise the feeling of being here. He was absolutely determined to not forget his time here, with his surrogate group who, for the most part, never even knew that he'd been here.

If there was a stray tear that fell occasionally as he tried to get to sleep, Seungri ignored it.

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KeyWolf25888
Yo guys I made a twitter if anyone wants updates on my writing or wants to talk @Alltheaus

Comments

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injeong
#1
Chapter 32: YES THERE'S MORE WHOOOO
injeong
#2
Chapter 31: AHHHHHHHSO I'M CRYING AND SCREAM AND FANGIRLING AT THE SANE TIME
omg all those typos
THIS IS SO CUTE
AJAJDKKSLAKDOROWKSJXKDKW
I'm still really sad that they both don't remember I get as confused as the characters ;-;
BUT SJDKAKDKSLQODOEOAKSALLDROOSOA
ElevenSkyHorses
#3
Chapter 31: Wow it's so strange reading about other Seunghyun than Seungri, but I kind of like it. It brings insight to what happened to Seunghyun that whole time during the universe swap. Jonghyun should known soon that his Seunghyun is back.

I'm sad that the end has come, but thank you so much for writing such a wonderful story. It was quite a journey, and I enjoyed every bit of it.
FeatherFall
#4
Chapter 31: So does that mean Seunghyun didn't have the same experience as Seungri had??? Omg

I feel so giddy. Reading about Seunghyun is a bit weird, but then I remember that he isn't Seungri and it becomes refreshing. I have a feeling Jonghyun would know eventually though.

It's been amazing. I mean, just the concept and the possibilities really brought me in. Thank you so much! I'm really glad that I perused the Seungri tag one day and found this. Thank you! :)
FeatherFall
#5
Chapter 30: OMG the endiiing. It's like I want it and I don't. I'm so excited!!!! Thank you agaaaaaiiin!!! :)
ElevenSkyHorses
#6
Chapter 30: Am I ready for the ending? Nope, totally not. Aw, poor Ri. Hope he feels better. Can't wait for the next chapter.
injeong
#7
Chapter 30: NOOOO YOU'RE KIDDING ME RIGHT HE CAN'T ACTUALLY HAVE JUST --- NOOOO AND WHAT ABIUT TAEMIN
AND THAT GRI FLUFF KIKLED ME EVEN MOREEEEEE
allie18 #8
Chapter 29: Oh my gosh I knew this'd be coming but I'm still not readyyy :'( I'm gonna miss this story!
ElevenSkyHorses
#9
Chapter 29: This ending- oh my god, I cried. I'm still crying. I'll definitely miss this story. I love it so much. Can't wait for the next chapter.
FeatherFall
#10
Chapter 29: Oh man it feels so surreal that this is ending. It's like I want more. I'm attached now too. OMG. Seungri-aaaah
At the same time I'm so excited for the next chapter. Thanks so much!!!!