You look to the clear sky of San Francisco after landing and sigh “here I am…whenever I get hurt, I’m here! Firstly it’s my parents and now, I got hurt myself and came here… not hurt to that extent but please help me again… Help me atleast not to remind myself that I can also like someone despite of having a note of not to fall for anyone”… You go out and get surprised to see your past friends(Jenna-you used to live with her, Daniel and some others) waiting for you… They hug you answering for your blank face “It’s your friend JunMi”… You call her immediately while she picks up yelling “how are you??! Are you ok??? Did they come?”… You cut her off answering “missing you!”… She smiles hardly and was about to say about HJ as she is on her way to his concert, then you request her “never say me about him please…ever!”… She obeys and start so nice conversation all your way to your flat where you used to live with your friends before!! Luckily you got to work with a company which is just 30min distance from there… You start of your new life…It was a nice start… But you could never forget even a single hair strand of him… Time passes but you still couldn’t get over … You make yourself busy working for two associations, still you couldn’t get over… The more you try, the harder it get on you… You became like a lifeless soul, even your friends had noticed the change in you… You often have hallucinations of him , you thought to yourself ‘I didn’t feel like this when I lost my parent’s love…but now!! Why do I feel so..I didn’t love him anyway…but still!! Why???!!’…

Days and months pass on… On the other hand, HJ is busy himself doing many fan services and concerts… He found out you left but he kept himself busy… He don’t even have a single day free till Christmas… Making many TV shows and events along with his ‘REBIRTH’ tour… He is working so hard to fulfil everything that he lost in the past…

                      You think as if you don’t care your feelings anymore and move on… “But past is like a shadow, it follows all the time till your life brightens up with reasonable instant”… And for you, your past is like your soul…you can’t even live without it but you don’t want to live with it! You’re just living not to disappoint your friends around who always stay in front line to make you smile… Everyone around you plan to leave for their relatives for Christmas, it’s when your friend Lisa (works in advertising department in one association of yours) ask you “where are you planning for Christmas!”… (In Your Mind: its already Christmas…its been half year since I left my place… people there would have gathering which feels lively.. and that person--- no..no one! I am alone… I don’t want to think of him)… Daniel shook you from your thoughts bringing you to present asking “Aileen… we asked you about the place of your Christmas plan, not to go there in your thoughts.. AILEEE…N”… Daniel is your childhood friend who always cares for you more… You look at him and reciprocate “yeah yea.. I’m not going anywhere, you guys carry on!”… They’re not surprised at your response as they knew well that something is bothering you too much and they don’t want to force you to share it with them which make it hard on you… Others make their ways with family while Jenna, Lisa and Daniel decide to stay with you and spend their time there…

                  On 22^nd Dec, you hang out with your friends for dinner as they planned beside the beach trying to throw smiles at Daniel who is trying hard to make a fun atmosphere… All of a sudden, you feel strange and cold on your feet… You look straight where you see a figure walking towards you with a bright smile and you come to realize its HIM... (In Your Mind: there you go… you stupid brain…started hallucinating him… arghh…strange…stop it… he can’t be here… if it’s any other time than Christmas I would believe it…He can’t be here now!  whenever I hallucinated him these months, I ended up touching wall or poll where I used feel him standing but none is true)… You close your eyes and throw back the glances, you can feel him walking again… You feel so cold and hot at the same time in one place, you hold at that place and look down to see its your heart whose beat can’t  be felt… You hold it tight as he walks nearer to your table and you still can’t feel your heart… What in the world is happening?! There he got near your table and stand beside you smiling widely… Then Daniel look at your weird actions and say “Don’t tell me that you are having heart now!!”… Everyone laugh while you ask him “why do I feel like someone standing here!”… You see them looking numb and get relieved that there’s no one. But still your heart beat is not heard… Lisa smiles widely winking to the others… Then you hear a voice “Hiee”, don’t know why but you can feel your heart beat now, it’s quite fast realizing the familiar voice you don’t want to hear… You’re patting your heart, telling it to be slow on your mind not sure of the person behind you existed for real…You can feel that he is leaning forward for handshake with everyone there and for surprise, Lisa is introducing him and she left you as she know that you worked with him… You still don’t raise your head or take your hand from your chest… He place himself beside you saying in a soothing tone “How have you been Aileen?!”… What a lovely voice, you’re somehow happy to hear him... All these are running in your mind and you feel his warmth hand on your shoulder which is rendering for this comforting person… You then come to this world out of your thoughts and look at the person… It’s him, he is here for real, the one you want to run away from, what to do now?!!

You stand yelling at him “You??! Again you??!! What the hell are…. Y-o..u”… He cuts you stating “again and again… you respond me in the same way all the time and anywhere… Thank god... Its Aileen I know… if you don’t shout on me, I would take you as some other person as you’re quiet till now”…

You hear your friends laughing at his words while he smile brightly…(In Your mind: his smile…woahhh! Its been so long…I miss it… wait WAIT!! Im not missing anyone) You ask him “what made you dive in here?”… Lisa respond to you “He is going to work with our company magazine and I’m in charge of him here…I called him here to lead him to his hotel…He arrived an hour back”… He smile with his head down but looks at you when you look at him after hearing to Lisa… You just stared into his eyes asking him in that stare ‘how are you?’, to which he move his head smiling… Daniel pulls your hand to sit and ask him “you worked with her right... so are you friends or just behave like staff and artist”… You don’t say anything as you get worried that they might know the reason you left your hometown if you talk about him and you hear HJ saying “she became close to my friends”… You think ‘wow! Simple and short’ while Daniel reciprocate “ofcourse! She will become near and dear one once she start mingled up”… You cut their laughs asking HJ “did you eat?!”… He looks at you nodding ‘YES’ as an answer while he smile to himself… You know he is not being him as there are some strangers infront of him but there’s definitely something he is smiling to…

You look at him raising your eyebrows like ‘what?!’ , he say “you ask as if you’re worried!”… Your friends smile while you try to protest to which he continues “I know… I won’t be the last one in your worry list right!” , saying this he laugh even hard to which you make an irritating face… Daniel ask you “how did you people work together? You seem more like rivals and not friends”... You snap at him “He said I’m close to his friends… don’t you get that”… HJ shook his head saying to himself ‘she is trying to be hard, as usual!’ and keep staring at you… You will be thinking like ‘did you get that! I don’t like you’…

Both your thoughts were interrupted when Lisa asked you a favour “Please take him to this address… I have something came up and should leave with Jenna…Danni will be dropping us…so please” she hand over a card to you… You look at HJ and he shrugs his shoulders which mean ‘you don’t have a choice’… You refuse to go , even though she is pleading you thoroughly, you say ‘NO’ in quiet harsh tone… Then HJ state “it’s ok Miss Lisa… I can go on my way…Just hand over that to me”… He can take the address from you but he asked Lisa to pass over the card and walked away bidding smiles at others without looking at you… Lisa say in a harsh tone “he will get a driver tomorrow, but now…it’s new to him! I thought he is friend of you as you worked for him… what’s the matter?”… You don’t answer (In Your Mind: I know he is hurt… I refused to go with him… he thinks I’m a friend to him…he helps me whenever needed) then Daniel snaps your thoughts saying “Yeah! That’s quite harsh!! But anyways, Lets go… are you coming with us?!”… You respond “no.. I can’t come…I need to catch him” in a swift motion you run towards the direction he left…

You find him and yell “hey…hey!! Ughh Hey listen!”… He don’t look at you (In His mind while walking to hotel: After long time, I see her in simple denim and an elegant green sleeve…with a cardigan…lovely herself but she is stubborn…don’t even greet me and now…she won’t send me off when I needed help…too much for now… And what?? ‘hey??’ don’t I have name? Come on… I want to hear my name from your lovely tone girl! ), then you call him “Hyun Joong”, it’s when he turn back to see you and his wish is fulfilled…. You tell him “let me come with you… I had my car over there”… He immediately answer “I can go Aileen… its not so far so I can walk…don’t bother and get back to your friends”…

You felt hurt after hearing his sad tone… ( In Your Mind: Please Hyun Joong… I’m afraid to be the way I am before) He starts walking away, then you say “let’s walk then”… He is about to protest, but you say “don’t be a stubborn child now!”… He chuckles at you saying “don’t blame me... not my fault… and I didn’t start it or I’m not the one who refused everything”… He walk away then you run beside him saying “ohkay… let me be stubborn then… Even though you don’t want me to come, I’m here…walking with you”…

He smiles and you smile back that’s when he stares at you asking “why?”…Then you answer “you’re my responsibility”… You think like ‘what?!! ‘Responsibility’ , from when??! What did I say!!’… To cover up that, you add on “Lisa said to make you to hotel right!!”… He smiles himself walking slowly while you look away to other side avoiding his gaze… Silence is filled, only the snow from your breathes could be seen in that cold place… You walk for about 15min, neither of you talked nor exchanged any glances… He used to stare at you like a thief while you did the same, you steal your sight on him…

At his hotel, you were about to leave then he holds you (the warm hand in this cold atmosphere) and ask “will you go all alone?”… You turn to him as he leave your hand and say “im used to it… see ya!”…

He say in a husky tone “take care” , you smile at him and walk away… In 5min you see your friends approaching you, you get in their car and leave from there…

After you reached your place, you change to your night suit and fall on bed thinking ‘why did you appear now Hyun Joong… its already too hard for me to stop thinking…and now…why should you get an offer here? Why out of all places, here??! But I will try hard to stay away and be nice to you…you helped me all time… bear me now too… arghhh it will be really hard’… you fell asleep feeling his appearance after 6months…

At his hotel he mumbles himself on his bed “it going to be too hard than I thought!! Can I do it?..”…… “yaaa… I’m Kim Hyun Joong… I can do it”… His eyes found their way to Space ruling aliens zZZ (Ofcourse he is Alien Prince... hahahahhhh uZoOsIn)……