Chapter one- something unusual, strange, or causing wonder or terror

“...Jinnie, if we let this go any long, don't you think there's a chance she might... you know, play a different field.” Amber rolled her eyes as she sat huddled outside her parent's room holding her pillow to her chest and trying to keep her self from yelling out in protest.

“I'm worried too Jon, she hasn't even brought a female friend home in months... do you think she might already?”

there was a pause, then her father sputtered out, “o-of course not, no daughter of mine would be a lesbian, there's just no way!” he scoffed. Amber pictured his face red and his eyes bulging like they always did when he was angry, which brought a little smile to her face.

“Now Jon, it's a bit different for kids these days, homouality is more excepted... she could be confused...” insert another eye roll here.

“jinyoung, it's just not right, a girl shouldn't be with a girl.” her father urged.

“I think that too hun, but Amber's growing up in a different country then we did, and I mean, she's going through that rebellious stage, she could be clinging to anything to distinguish herself from us so-” Amber didn't want to hear anymore, her mother's shrink mantra was just as bad as her father's right out dismissal. She'd gone up to their room that night to wish them good night when she heard the conversation they were having and found her self wanting to know what they really thought about her sudden change, though she was finding her self not liking where it was leading.

It'd happened at the end of eighth grade year, she'd been like a “normal” girl and wore “female” clothing, even wore makeup. She always hung out with the same group of friends, girls she'd known since kindergarten, they were her best friends... that is, until Candy's boyfriend decided he'd taken a fine liking to Amber and wanted to deflower her. She wanted nothing to do with this boy but her “friends” didn't seem to believe her.

She was thrown out of their little clique and since then they've been nothing but nasty to her.

After that she kept mostly to her self when she was at school. For a while there all she did was go to classes, have lunch outside on a wall by her self then went straight home after the last few classes, though that schedule got interrupted by Kevin Woo and Eli Kim who quickly latched onto her. They took her in, made her feel welcome the moment they said hi!

As time went on she began to... change. By the time they were Sophomores Amber didn't look like sweet innocent Amber anymore, no, now she dressed like her two best friends and even sort of acted like a boy as well... the thing was though, she didn't miss being a girl, she thoroughly enjoyed being one of the boys, acting like a slob and playing sports, working on cars and all that... well Kevin wasn't really into that kind of stuff, he him self acted a bit more feminine so it wasn't like Amber completely surrounded by male activities... the important part though was that she was actually happy with her friends, she could genuinely say they were her friends.

This though, why the hell did her parents think she was was into girls? Just because she stopped wearing dresses and makeup? Please, if anything she'd wish every girl on the planet to disappear, she'd had just about enough of the drama that came with females.

And really, she couldn't help checking out boys either, hence why she didn't mind when Eli switched on Football or any kind of sports really.

She rolled her eyes again as she layed in her bed, staring up at her ceiling and wishing her parents would stop tweaking- she wasn't into chicks for crying out loud and they'd save on a lot of heart ache if they'd just talk to her about all of this. She turned over on her side and let out a little sigh, her parents were to busy to notice that she was actually happy for once, they were only interested in how she presented her self and not how she felt.

-

“I can't believe you've allowed it to go on for this long Jinyoung-ah~.” Amber's grandmother scoffed as she examined Amber from head to toe, “ if she were mine I'd never allow her to dress like that, does she even think she'd a woman?” she spoke as if Amber wasn't right infront of her, no, Grandmother had a her nose so firmly up in the air that she thought she was above everyone.

“Omma, It's not like I have much of a choice, our Amber's a very stubborn girl.” Jinyoung stated and patted Amber like she were a child or even a pet.

“ well, if my Jonghyun started wearing make up and dresses I'd stop it right away, she'll never meet a suitable husband if she dresses like that... that is, if she even wants men anymore.” Amber shot Jonghyun a pleading look that he ignored, not out of spite but because he knew if he stated that he was on his niece's side his mother would kill him. Being only a year older then his niece, and eighteen years younger then his sister Jinyoung, their relationship dynamic was a bit off, if anything they thought of each other as cousin's more then uncle and niece... the fact that Mrs.Kim was also Amber's Grandma was another dynamic that was always hard to grasp, the woman didn't look a year over forty (the wonders of plastic surgery) even when she was nearing her sixties.

“Oh well-”

“If she were raised here in Korea like she should she wouldn't be so confused, she'd grow up knowing that she's a woman instead of a man.” Grandmother scowled and turned towards her youngest, “Why don't you take your niece out for a bit, I need to talk to your sister for a bit.” she didn't ask, she flat out ordered her son who quickly bounced to his feet to do as his mother wished.

Anger radiated off of Amber as she walked beside Jonghyun down the streets of Seoul, knowing full well that if she said anything against he Grandmother she'd be in even more trouble, “so you decide being a girl wasn't fun?” Jonghyun asked nonchalantly as he walked along side his favorite niece.

“yeah... girls annoy me now.” she stated, still steaming at the thought of her Grandmother's accusations.

“ah, well can't blame you, I don't even know what's wrong with them half the time, we really are the better .” Jonghyun grinned and patted Amber on the back, “How's Jackie, heard she's getting married to some big Japanese guy, mom had a cow when she heard.” he chuckled at the memory of his mother nearly having a heart attack at the news.

“ah, well he seems like an ok guy, eats a lot though, he came over for dinner and nearly cleaned the table.” Amber smiled and peered over at her uncle, “You still dating that scrawny chick, the one that tried to tear your ear off the last time I visited?”

“nah, she was to crazy for me, that and mom liked her.” he said making Amber chuckle, “what about you, dating anyone?”

Amber blushed and shook her head, “nah, I stopped dating, I mean I'm not really interesting to guys anymore since I started dressing like this.” she couldn't help smiling, her dressing habits weren't the only thing that scared the boys off, she had two boys practically glued to her twenty four seven so most people figured she was dating either if not both of them.

“bummer, I always thought you had a special charm, I'd totally date you if you weren't my niece.” Jonghyun grinned and pulled his arm around Amber who cracked up laughing.

“oh, Grandmother would just love that, hell she'd probably love it more then me being a lesbian.”

“oh you know it, back in her days wasn't frowned upon.”

Amber couldn't help feeling thankful towards Jonghyun that day, with out him she'd probably never be able to get through her yearly visits to her grandmother's in Korea. He'd always been a weird little guy but she didn't mind it so much when it meant she could talk to someone about what ever was on her mind... and he never seemed to judge, he truly was her favorite person in the world.

-

“I don't understand...” Amber said as she sat there on her mother's old childhood bed, staring up at her parents who stood there looking unsure of their own words.

“Your grandmother thinks it's best that you stay in Korea and live here with her.” Jinyoung repeated her words, still looking a bit upset.

“Grandmother hates me though, why does she want me to stay longer?”

“She doesn't hate you-”Jon tried to get out.

“Amber, she'll, she'll help you...” Jinyoung tried to reason, keeping her eyes on her old dresser so as not to look into her daughter's eyes.

“Help me with what? Am I defective or something.” her angry started bubbling up to the surface, all patience she was able to give these past few days withering by the minute.

“it's not that... it's just, you... you need to learn how to...how to...”

“how to be what mother? A perfect little lady? Am I not good enough for you guys?” Amber stood up, somewhat towering over her mother who coward behind her husband, not out of fear of her daughter but out of guilt at her own feelings towards her daughter.

“exactly Amber, you can't go around acting like a boy anymore, it's just not right.” Jon finally got out, deciding that it was best not to dance around the subject.

Amber stood there shocked, shocked that it was finally out- her parents didn't like what she was, she was finally happy and they didn't care, “I-I'm not going back to what I was before, I like who I am right now.” she stated and glared up at her father, her decision made, “Go ahead and make me stay here, it's not gonna change a thing, hell, I might even shave my head and go ing butch!” she screamed at them and pushed through them out the door and down the hall, ignoring their calls. She wanted, no, needed some air. She slipped into her sneakers and pulled on Jonghyun's hoodie, having forgotten her's in her mother's old room, then stepped out of her grandmother's house.

It was about eight at the moment, the sky the dark and the street lights were on, though it didn't really matter to her, it could be pitch black and she'd still welcome the cold autumn night over the stuffy room she'd just been in. She reached into her uncle's pocket and found his MP3 player, deciding that music would be a good escape. She slipped his ear buds into her ears and turned it on, letting the loud rock music drowned out her still elevated heart beat.

Was it so bad that she dressed like this? Why'd it even matter to them how she dressed, it's not like they were going to date her... And really, even if she were into girls why should they care, shouldn't they just be happy that she was happy?... no, of course not, these were her parents after all...

by the time she reached home it was near midnight. She had calmed down and even felt a bit guilty when she spotted her mother sleeping on the couch, obviously having been waiting for her return only to fall asleep. She gave a little sigh and draped a blanket over her before going to bed, deciding that it was probably not her frail mother's fault that she'd be living with her grandmother, if anything it was her own fault for not fitting her grandmother's vision of perfection.

(AN-This is sorta a story for all those who don't... fit the norm, for those who feel as though no one really knows them. When I was going to school a lot of people questioned my uality because I didn't dress like a girl, and well, that's sorta what I was drawing from while I was writing them. Just cause you're a tomboy it doesn't mean you're any less of a girl or a lesbian for that matter, people always seem to have that misconception though... I mean I have nothing wrong with lesbians, I wouldn't have a probablem if I were one, but I'm not, I genuinely like guys so it's...I don't know, it's not like I get offended at the accusation, it's just that they didn't ask me first, I mean I really wouldn't have been offended if someone actually asked me instead of out right deciding for me...

but yeah, further chapters won't be this angsty, just setting up a bit^^

and I actually have a friend who is the same age as his niece, I thought it'd be fun to have Jonghyun be her uncle^^)