Because of my “special observation” I wasn’t able to communicate with guys like I used to. It was like I suddenly realised that these people are men in fact. And I really wasn’t good with these creatures. But fortunately everything got back to normal routine after while but I wouldn’t want to go through that week again. So in the end I wasn’t paying attention to the way we’re treating each other again even though I maybe should.

During one of the dancing rehearsals just with Nino, Sho and Ohno-kun I suddenly felt a very sharp pain in my lower leg. I wasn’t sure what that was and just froze.

“Need a break already? We’ve just started…” Nino smirked at me.

“Not funny…” I mumbled and leaned on Sho-kun next to me. I tried to bend my leg and then stand on it again.

“Oh crap! It really hurts…” I sighed. Sho-kun took me around my waist so I could rest on that leg.

“What were you doing?” Nino looked annoyed.

“Nothing!” I answered angrily. He doesn’t have to show me how big pain I am for him.

“Mady-chan told me that she wants to practice more for Right Back To You so we had a dancing session yesterday.” Oh-chan had a serious look on his face.

“And you overdid it Oh-chan…” Nino added. “She shouldn’t do that so much. You can’t be so easily convinced.”

“It’s my fault.” I didn’t want to blame Ohno-kun.

“Yes, it is.” Nino nodded.

“Well, talking won’t fix it…” Sho-kun interrupted us. “Try to stand on your own; I’m going to take a look. It could be just a cramp.” He instructed me.

I tried to balance on one leg and Ohno decided to help me. He was probably feeling guilty.

Sho-kun rolled up my trousers and then I felt his warms hands on my leg.

“Does it hurt like that?” he looked up.

“A little….” I made a grimace.

“It’s okay. Just rest for today. We used to have it pretty often, ne?” he stood up.

“So instead of dance practice we’re going to have music practice!” Nino decided quickly. “Even if that means that I need to give you a back ride.”

“Forget it…” I barked at him even though I knew that any complaints are useless.

“You know, honey, you should return home. It’s not good for you to be so far away from your home…” I heard dad’s voice.

I almost fell from the sofa I was sleeping in. Weird dream. Dad’s words still ringed out in my head even though I was already awake. Just in the afternoon I’ve received an e-mail from him that he’s looking forward to my new movie. He wouldn’t tell me to return home. He knew how much I love this country and this work. And these people…

“Still here?” Yamapi entered the actor’s lounge. “It’s already over for today.”

I slowly stood up. “I know…I just fell asleep…” I rubbed my face.

“You look like you had some nightmares…” Yamapi sat in front of me.

“Sort of…actually my dad was calling me home…in that dream…” I mumbled.

“But he’s supporting you in your actions, isn’t he?”

“Yeah…he messaged me that he can’t wait for Kurosagi movie…” I grinned.

“Oh…does he know we’re playing lovers?” Yamapi giggled.

 “I tried to prepare him for it…” I giggled too.

After a little pause Yamapi spoke up: “We’re going for some drink with Koyama. Do you want to join us?”

I hesitated. I wasn’t sure if I want to get drunk in front of Yamapi today. So I slightly shook my head. “Sorry, I’m not in the mood today. Next time…”

“As you wish. So… I’ll be leaving first.” He took his jacket and left. I wonder if he’s angry about my refusal.

I decided to leave too and forgot about my leg. I felt that sharp pain from this morning. “Crap…” I moaned. I thought it’s over. So it looks I’m still going to limp around like a hurt animal. I sighed heavily and looked at my watch. Wait… it’s Monday and next door is News Zero broadcasting. Actually it’s should going to end about now. I think I’m going to take a look.

I peeked into the studio and sat on one of the staff chairs. Sho’s corner called Ichiman was in it’s middle. My eyes slightly widened. I had to admit that I didn’t understand everything he said but I was really amazed by him. He looked so professional. I could imagine him as a politician. He was talking about some issues regarded to North Korea then he promptly answered some question… I couldn’t take my eyes of him.

During the commercial break Sho spotted me. He smiled widely and waved at me. I was afraid he would be mad that I went to see him but it looked like a total opposite. But suddenly I didn’t know how to react. I just smiled a little and nodded at him. I felt a slight blush on my cheeks. What the hell?

It took just another ten minutes to the end of today’s News Zero.

“Otsukaresama….” I smiled at Sho when he approached me. It was the best I was able to say.

“Thanks for coming. Have you already eaten?” he asked me as he dragged me to his dressing room.

“Oi, take it easy. My “dancing leg” remember?” I try to slow him down.

He stopped immediately: “Oh I’m sorry, I forgot. Are you okay?”

“Ii yo. And no, I haven’t eaten yet.” I admitted that I forgot about dinner today.

“I have wonderful idea. Just wait…” he rushed to change from his suit.

Sho decided that we’re going to drive to Chinese restaurant, take the food with us and eat it in the Tokyo Bay. The view was wonderful at the late hour like this. After we finished the dinner we leaned against the ceiling and observing the beautiful Tokyo panorama.

“Well…I have to say you were stunning in that news.” I started slowly. Luckily the darkness was able to cover my red face. I just had to tell him. I wasn’t good with keeping things like that for myself.

“Thank you. I really appreciated your presence today.” He nodded.

“Really?” I looked at him.

“Maybe I wanted to show up a little in front of you…” he grinned.

“Oh, is that so?” I laughed. “Anyway…you’re way to perfect.”

“Stop it already. Someday you’ll be better than me…” he interrupted me.

“In newscasting?” I raised my eyebrows.

“In whatever you’ll going to do. You’re going to university, right? I bet you’ll be great.” He looked up in the dark sky.

Suddenly I felt some kind of pain and it wasn’t in my leg this time. “Do you want to know something?”

“Hm?” Sho turned to me.

“I’ve never told it to anyone but…I’m pretty scared. You’re probably going to ask what about. But I don’t know. I would say that I’m scared of future.” I started silently. “Truth is I don’t feel any pressure from anyone. Everyone is so nice to me. You, my family… The main problem is me. I’m too scared of disappointing someone. And things are getting worse with my stupid habit of imagining the worst possible endings…So…the university…even though I wanted to get in there…now I’m scared.”

Sho put his arm around my shoulders and pulled me closer to him. He didn’t say anything.

“The only way how to prove myself that I’m actually good at something is to be with you, with Arashi, in Johnny’s. It gives me the new will for life. And Arashi means so much to me. I’m telling you not just as a member of group but also as a fan.” I finished my awkward speech.

“You’ve just said something amazing…” he whispered. “You sure have some though times but you can always rely on us. We’re your family. We’re Arashi, Mady-chan. Don’t forget that. And we would be happy if we could help you to overcome this fear. There’s nothing to be afraid of. We’re always going to be here for you. I’m speaking for every member.” He whisperd to my ear.

I started to feel tears coming to my eyes so without thinking I buried my face into his shoulder. I felt how he wrapped his arms around me. I don’t know how long we were standing there like that but then I thought I should thank him for his soothing words. I looked up at his face.

“Thank you, Sho-chan…” I smiled a little. It was the first time I called him like that. He smiled softly and then I felt his warm lips against mine. I pulled him closer to me as he was the only thing I wanted at the moment.

Another shocking chapter is up! Enjoy =)