_{A Heart Divided}

^{_________________________________________♦ Chapter 27: Finally♦____________________________________________________________________________________________________________}

♦Sara's POV♦

I look at my phone and see hundreds of missed calls and messages from Jonghyun.

Each message telling me how sorry he is. How he's a bad person. And even more sorry's.

Hyosung let's me borrow one of her school uniforms since last nights sleep over wasn't something that was planed ahead.

I feel thankful to her and let her know so many times. But she just smiles and says that everything is "ok".

But it's not ok.

Thinking about it clearly, last nights events weren't that bad. Sure I almost got by my boyfriend. But I left. I left before it could happen. And that's the only thing that is "ok".

But Onew left me, and that doesn't make me feel ok.

I lost him, I'm obviously leaving Jonghyun, I'm alone again.

At least, I pray to God Hyosung doesn't leave me also. Then I will be truly alone, and that's not ok.

I try to shake off those negative thoughts as I put on the borrowed uniform. Everything fits good except for the blouse. Not everyone is as gifted as Hyosung in the top area.

Well its not like I want to be exactly seen by others right now. I tuck in the button down blouse as best as I can and then hide even more of myself with a huge oversized sweater. I felt protected by it's warmth.

I went to my classes as normal. Not talking and making the least movements possible.

I avoided any human contact possible. Everything is going fine for now.

I still see no sign of Onew anywhere. He definitely hates me.

Lunch came and I didnt know where to go to avoid people as much as possible.

So I end up alone in the library.

I get a book that I'm not going to read, and just sit down at an empty table.

I immediately zone out processing this feeling of loneliness inside me when I suddenly feel someone sitting down next to me.

I look up shocked when I see the person is Jonghyun. My chest tightens, but soon relaxes when I see his face.

He's not looking at me, he's only looking down. He has a Hood on practically covering his whole face. But I can still see his face filled with bruises, from the top of his forehead to the bottom of his jaw.

This is the first time I can say that he just looks terrible.

"Did I do that to you?" I asked worried that I actually don't know my own strength.

Jonghyun chuckles softly but still doesn't look up at me.

"No" he said vaguely, "but I'm glad somebody did.I really deserved it"

Silence passes and I begin to grow uncomfortable. I don't want to feel bad for him, he did deserve it, but who did this to him?

"Who did this to you?" I ask finally.

"He said I wasn't allowed to even look at you. And I think it's best if I don't, for your safety."

I was having a hard time understanding what he was trying to say, but he continues, "I'm so sorry, and I understand if you can't forgive me, I understand if you hate me. I understand if you can't be with me.....I never planed on going that far. I never meant to lose control and hurt you. I just-..... in all honestly, wanted to be with you because you were someone I couldn't have. And then when I had you, something inside me that I never felt before grew, and that made me want to protect you and always see you smile. I wanted to be the reason you smile.and that desire made me want to make you mines. And that selfish feeling made me lose control and go to those measures.I'm really sorry Sara. I didnt make you smile, I made you cry."

He paused for a little bit, never looking up at me.

"He told me not to look at you, and that's exactly what I'm going to do. I won't look at you, because I'm scared that if I do, I loose my self control again. I'm sorry Sara, you probably already broke up with me in your head, but I'll still say it out loud....we can't be together anymore, I just can't be near you, for your own safety. Goodbye....my first love"

His last words were inaudible for me to hear, but I heard him say goodbye as he got up and turned away without setting an eye on me.

And just like that, my first 'real' crush, and my first boyfriend left.

The day seemed to be going on as if it had 100 hours.

Classes went by slowly and seemed to never finish.

Jonghyun apparently left school early.

It was not until then that I realized the sudden gazes from students as I passed by. Whispering stuff to each other, wondering why Jonghyun looks the way he does, why we're not together. It's driving me insane the glances they give me.

I feel so alone, why do always feel alone.

I feel this pressure and I feel like I'm about to lose it and start crying right where I stand.

But suddenly an arm wraps around me, I look up expecting someone, but instead I seen smiling Hyosung reassuring me everything is "ok". That's right, I'm not completely alone.

"Sorry I'm not who you were expecting," she chuckles as she leads me outside the school building.

She sits me on a bench that I always thought was awkwardly positioned in the middle of the schools field.

Onew and I used to race to see who could reach it first, and ofcourse I would always lose

"Wait here, I'll bring us some soda from the machine," said Hyosung bringing me out of my past memories.

But my memories continued. Onew and I liked this spot. It was quiet, and not many people came over to this side of the school. It was on the back side of the building and there weren't any windows that look over on this side. It was quiet.

My flash backs of the past were cut again when I felt a tap on my shoulder. I opened my eyes to see in front of me a can of hot coffee.

"I don't know what she was thinking getting you something cold to drink when you get cold so easily"

That voice. It sinks in me and warms me from the inside. It runs chills down my spine but at the same time feels so honey soft as it runs through my ears.

His voice.

I stand up almost immediately and turn to face him.

He looks down at the ground and he hands me the canned coffee.

After a while of standing in silence and me trying to swallow down the frog stuck in my throat, he speaks, "Are you ok?"

I swallow hard and bite down on my lip as I nod Yes, but my attempts are futile and my eyes start to leak.

In what seemed like milliseconds of my first tear dropping, Onew's arms wrapped around me, burying my face in his chest.

He was so warm and so close, I didn't want him to let me go. My cries where muffled by his chest. I could hear his heart beat racing with mine.

"I'm so sorry Sara. It's all my fault. I should have never walked away." His voice cracks. "I was stupid. I was selfish. I'm so sorry I waited until you actually got hurt. I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry."

His pleads for forgiveness continued like that, but I was the one who was most sorry.

Through my muffled cries I started, "No I'm the one who's sorry. I'm the one who chose a stupid crush instead of the person who's been with me my whole life. I'm sorry I didn't see you the same way you saw me. I'm sorry it took me this long to see you the same way."

His hug got tighter, removing any little bit of space and air between us.

I continued with my cries, that at this point were just incoherent shrieking word.

"I'm sorry that I hurt you, I'm sorry if I hurt your pride, I'm sorry that I ate chicken with another man." At this point I was apologizing about everything and anything, I just didn't want him to let me go.

Onew chuckled at my last apology and started to slowly let me go.

I sense of fear came to me, so I wrapped my dangling arms around his waist tightly.

"Please dont let me go, please dont leave me" I plead desperately at him,

"I won't leave, not this time, or ever again. I don't think I can survive without you again," he says as he lifts my face to stare into his eyes. My eyes still leaked, and it still ran down my cheek. His thumbs slowly wiped my face as he looked at me with tender eyes.

"Sara, dont break my heart again," and he pressed his lips softly on top of mine.

And this was everything I ever expected from a kiss. That jolt of electricity that warmed your body and made you feel beautiful.

"I won't" I said.

"I love you"

"I love you"

[THE END]

Author's Note:

Yay!!!~~

It's finally completed ~

first I would like to apologize for how long it took me to make updates. I know at a certain point the story was just dragging and you were probably losing interest. But I would like to Thank those who actually put up with it all the way to the end.

If you're an active reader or a silent reader, Thank you so much ♡

I really hope you have enjoyed my story, since this is like my first "real" fanfic.

If I ever make more in the future I will try my hardest to make it more interesting and full of feels ^^

Idk just leave your opinions below please ^^

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