Note: The italicized parts are flashbacks.

Chapter 32. Ephemeral

“I'd trade all my tomorrows for one single yesterday.”

― Kris Kristofferson

He was waiting for almost an hour for his brother. Shinwoo once again asked him to play at the bar and worse, he borrowed his car to meet with the owner of the new club at the other end of town. Even if Shinwoo was in dire need of money his pride won’t let him ask from his own brother. Yonghwa shrugged with the thought that Shinwoo still has a way of enslaving him. He was taking extra shifts at the bar but it was Yonghwa who would go and work.  

He groaned at that thought.

Nevertheless, it was his own fault because he would allow it—always.

“Saaamchooon!!!”

Before he knew it, a pair of fluffy arms imprisoned one of his legs and a set of wide puppy eyes peered back at him.

“Park Jihye! He isn’t your uncle, honey! I’m so sorry about this, she’s—”

The mother made her way towards them but the little person had better things in mind as she started running towards the open fountains.

“Samchon, play!!!!”

Yonghwa found himself laughing for it was a case of mistaken identity. He gave a quick nod at her mother, “I’m going to get her, please stay here.”

The woman nodded so he braved the possibility of going home soaked. He laughed some more when Jihye’s little feet clumsily stomped on the puddles while she giggled like discovering something wonderful in her own world. The tiny ball of energy seemed to enjoy being chased and was terribly good at it much to Yonghwa’s chagrin. But then again, who was not having fun?

Finally, he found his chance as he sneaked behind her while she was busily inspecting where the waters were coming from. “Come here you, you little rebel!” Yonghwa grabbed her by the waist and raised her high up that earned him fits of giggles. Jihye laughed to her heart’s content but because it was a cool afternoon, Yonghwa decided to take her back to her mother despite her attempts to free herself from his arms.

“Thank you and I’m sorry…”

The woman shook her head regretfully but he just dropped a hand on the girl’s head and ruffled her wet hair, “Now, listen to your Umma, Jihye?” Yonghwa said but she just laughed and waved at him, “Bye… bye…”

It was only when Jihye and her mother were gone that he realized the cold breeze slithering through his body. “Aishhhhh, chincha…” he muttered to himself since looked like one of those elementary kids playing on the fountains. His shirt was wet and his pants were wet; his hair was altogether a different story.

“Great!” He cursed out loud and started undoing his buttons maybe he should find a place to change—

His gaze lifted towards the distance at the instinct of looking for a public restroom. But, something— no, someone caught his attention. There she was standing in front of him mouth halfway opened and eyes fixed intently at him.

A smile curved on his lips.

The sight blew him away—the girl blew him away.

For Yonghwa, love at first sight is as trivial as love itself. How could it even happen?

But it was… happening that moment.

He smiled some more when her lips stretched into the same one he was wearing and he tipped his head in short greeting. The girl looked behind her and he chuckled to himself. But then again, how crazy it was? He shook his head.

“What are you doing, you fool?” Yonghwa asked himself and started to walk away towards the other direction. Farther away from the girl who almost had him believing at things he would normally shove off. Besides, he didn’t look as presentable as he should be meeting a girl at the park. “Jihye, you little…”

Another smile escaped his lips.

That girl—that woman, though had his heart racing for a mere second of realizing her existence.

Her smile… her eyes…

From then on, Yonghwa knew that she would haunt him in his sleeping and waking moments.

And, she did.

Repeatedly.

~~~

Yonghwa buried his face on his palms when Joohyun quietly walked in her room leaving him to ponder how she accepted the news. Her sullen expression didn’t really give away what he expected of her but maybe she was still processing the thought in her mind. Does he want her to stop him? Probably yes and probably no.

“Oppa, can you come here for a second?”

He heard her call out so he dragged himself inside her bedroom and found her standing in front of her dresser with an arm outstretched at him. Joohyun smiled when she opened her hand to reveal a familiar-looking red guitar pick.

“I never get the chance to return this. It suddenly came to me that I have this.”

He grimaced inside as his gaze transferred from the object to her expectant look. Then Joohyun seemed to eye him curiously so he gently took the pick from her hand and stared at it again. It was the one he thought he misplaced; he couldn’t even remember the last time he used it. He turned to her again, “Where did you get this?”

“At the park, where we first met—“

At last it was clear to him. The sudden rush of cold air blew from his nape down to his body. He blinked repeatedly when Joohyun didn’t seem to catch his reaction and continued explaining.

“Shinwoo dropped that. All these time, I forgot to return it to him. I-I don’t want to keep it. I think you should have it.”

It never came to him that this day would come when he would finally tell her the truth. Yonghwa shut his eyes tight then with a heavy sigh he shook his head, “This isn't Shinwoo's.” Finally, she caught up. Her eyes widened and mouth hanging agape. Yonghwa watched her swallow before giving her reply.

“It was you… that day… at the park…”

He nodded before she could even continue.

“I-it was—“

“Yes. That was me, Joohyun…” Yonghwa tried to smile, “At the park, that day… that was me.”

Joohyun deliberately fell on the chair behind her, “I… t-this… this is crazy…”

“I know. Ours isn’t exactly a kind of a simple story…” Yonghwa muttered to himself still dazed by the sudden turn of events. But, at least, Joohyun finally knew.

The past was finally catching up on both of them. “I'm sorry for not telling you… you were with Shinwoo. I couldn’t tell you earlier too because… I don’t want to lay everything in front of you especially after what happened.”

“Did he know?”

He shook his head as he sat on the edge of her table, “I almost told him… he beat me to it.” However, Joohyun looked up at him with a confused expression so he continued, “He said he was in love with you…”

“What did it have to do with—“

Yonghwa sighed because he skipped the part where he told Shinwoo that he met a girl at the park and fell in love with her. “I mean, maybe he would get the wrong idea about me… and you, s-so I kept it to myself.

Joohyun was still perplexed but she nodded and looked at her reflection on the mirror. Stunned, her lips whispered softly, “All along I thought it was Shinwoo whom I saw at the park for the very first time… it never crossed my mind. If it did, then I might have ignored it.” Lifting her eyes to his, her heart asked, “Do you… remember that day?”

“Yes.”

Yonghwa was holding her gaze firmly and it was giving her the same feeling she got the other night they shared on the couch. Out of nowhere, Joohyun blurted out, “D-Did you remember me?”

“How can I forg—“ Yonghwa stopped himself before he could give too much again. With a tender smile, he reached out to touch her hair and confessed, “Yes, I remembered you…” Then, it was fresh in his mind again—that day.

The recollection brought a smile on his lips, “Have you ever had that moment where something happened to you, a minute— no, not even a minute, but just a single remembrance and you just realized that you won't forget that moment for the rest of your life? That was how it was…”

~~~

He found himself aimlessly walking on the streets. The sight of that woman had awoken this emotion deep within that made him restless and bewildered. What should he do? Does it really make sense? If he approached her, wouldn’t she be weirded out by him?

“Really, Yonghwa, stop acting like a lovesick teenager.” He scolded himself. He had seen far more beautiful woman than her in his lifetime but none of them ever left that effect on him. Was that a reason enough for him to try his luck?

He shook his head and continued walking until a sight caught his attention. A little flower shop that looked so out of place from the modern and ritzy shops surrounding it. His mind looked passed the display window towards those colorful flowers. Nobody could ever bypass that place; nobody could ever pretend it wasn’t there—like the girl in the park.

Maybe, just maybe, he should try to get her name. Without further thoughts, he pushed the door open and a welcoming smile beamed at him.

“Can you please make me the most beautiful arrangement you ever made in your life?” He blurted out and the woman behind the counter did nothing but blink, “P-please?”

“Uh…huh… okay…” The woman paced back and meticulously pulled out stems after stems of fresh flowers then turned to him once again, “Is this for your girlfriend?”

Yonghwa was tongue-tied but he was smiling like a fool. “Soon… after I find out her name.”

Finally, the woman smiled wider and nodded, “Fine! Let’s blow her mind away then!” As if waving her magic wand, she worked on the bouquet and moved extra fast when she noticed the young man’s obvious restlessness from the way his fingers drummed on the counter.

The woman handed him the bouquet and he took a heavy sigh as he dropped on the counter a wad of cash that could probably amount to five bouquets. Those thoughts were trifle things as he made his way out. A combination of sprint and run brought him back to the park. Yonghwa stood at the place where he saw her.

What did he expect? For her to wait for him there?

He looked around. He moved to a different corner. Like a fool, he carried the bouquet around scanning the crowd, covering every nook and praying.

Praying and wishing that she had the same epiphany that would make her go back to that place.

After making a few rounds, Yonghwa decided to sit on the bench near where she stood.

Maybe… just maybe…

Time ticked. Faces came and went.

He ignored the world until reality snapped its fingers at him.

She never came. They probably won’t happen after all.

Resignation washed all over him.

After almost half an hour of contemplating and calling himself stupid, Yonghwa was inside the flower shop again. The owner was surprised to see him, most especially how he looked. “I didn’t find her.”

“Oh… s-so…”

The bouquet was laid gently on the counter.

“Are you returning this?” She inquired and the man nodded listlessly, “No, you paid for it. You can take it.”

He looked at her and tried to smile, “I can’t take it. It belongs to her but… she wasn’t there anymore.”

She found herself reaching out for his hand and gave it a gentle pat, “Well then, I’ll hang on to this for the time being until you come and get the same one…” Finally, the boy smiled so she held the bouquet and took pictures of it using her phone while he was watching silently. Then she moved on unwrapping it and taking the flowers one by one and placed them on their respective vases

Wiping her hands on her apron, she approached him again. “I will hang on to them if you promise that you will hang on the belief that your path and this girl’s path are interconnected. One day, you will see her again and if that time happens, come back here and she will have her flowers.”

And, he did… believe…

~~~

Joohyun sat there overwhelmed and perplexed. When he said that he was the one on the park, flashes of that almost distant past came to her in a blur. So, that was the reason why Shinwoo was a totally different person from the one she first saw at the park— even their smiles—especially their smiles.  At last, Joohyun realized that the two might have looked exactly alike but the way they smile were totally different. Somehow she could tell the difference but putting exactly how remained in her heart.

Maybe it was the way those smiles made or makes her feel. Shinwoo’s was contagiously playful; Yonghwa’s is rather gentle yet intense.

It didn’t make sense at all.

And then, there was this thought that she had always seen Yonghwa in the past, not only those moments he would take his brother’s place but generally everywhere. Her eyes darted back at him and she asked, “You were always at school. You always saw me.”

Yonghwa scanned her face. The way her eyes looked a million miles away although she was looking directly at him was an indication that she was trying hard to bring all those memories. He nodded, confirming her thoughts. He watched her close her eyes but her lips melted into a very warm smile.

Perhaps, she was taking a walk down memory lane.

"You were an ephemeral experience for me… I saw you here… there… but always, always I didn’t see you…”

All he could do was to take a deep sigh as he listened to her mellowed voice and watch those lips form those words. Joohyun opened her eyes once again—bright and promising, they stared back at him.

“You were a memory purged by a dream.”

He smiled. She did it again—Joohyun just made him see that girl in the park. The rush, the suddenness—

It was love at first sight all over again.

The awareness left him sighing and smiling and he was captivated.

“I came back,” he revealed but she wore that surprised look so he shook his head, “I mean, that day when we first met, I went back to that place after a few minutes hoping you were there.”

“You did?”

“Yeah, funny, huh? I suddenly wanted to know you…” he confessed softly but stopped. The rest should not be said anymore. Yonghwa smiled as his eyes darted out of the window. It was a beautiful day, calm like his heart. “But, I had a feeling I would see you again.”

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thank you sooo much for the beautiful comments ^^ the story is (slowly) unfolding itself.... ~L