;;;;;

She felt anger surge from him. Nothing else but anger. She realized that pulling back would cause an argument and possibly make things worse if they were nearer to the mansion. If they fought on the street someone would definitely discover them. So, because of that, she allowed Changmin to drag her down the road and across a trail to somewhere where they could talk in privacy.

He let go of her hand and turned around to face her. His face was scrunched up in anger and disappointment.

“You knew.” he accused.

Taeyeon stared back at him silently wondering what was wrong.

“You didn’t tell me. You knew but you didn’t tell me. You were treating me like a fool! An idiot!”

The way he screamed at her made her fear for a second that he would jump at her. What had he found out? She had wanted to ask but nothing came from . He looked much more miserable than she’d ever thought him to be. Maybe for once he was allowing it to show.

“You’re not Shin Ae, are you?” Changmin seemed out of it.

“What?” Taeyeon felt her voice shake.

Changmin shook his head. “You’re playing with us! Mom told you everything, but you kept it from me! Why! Did I look like an idiot?! Did it look fun? I don’t deserve this! Why do you all lie to me!”

He let out a scream she’d never heard before then dropped onto the ground and clutched the grass with all his might. The dirt dug into his nails and he felt tears drop from his eyes.

“I hate you! I hate you!”

Taeyeon felt her heart race. He knew. Someone had told him. Changmin knew. That was what scared her the most. What if he told Leeteuk? What if Leeteuk found out? What if Leeteuk found out!? A voice screamed at her inside her head.

;;;;;

Leeteuk raced down the stairs almost tumbling down all at once. He coughed and called for air. What had just happened? The picture remained still in his memory and her laughter stayed imprinted there. His hands shook from the shock.

How to explain it? Leeteuk couldn’t fit the pieces together. It was a mess. A blurry mess that he couldn’t understand.

“Leeteuk!” he heard someone scream as footsteps rushed toward him.

“Are you ok? What happened?” Siwon helped him up.

Leeteuk glanced at him unable to stand.

“What’s going on? Where am I?” he questioned.

“Wha…” Yoona muttered from behind Siwon.

“What are you talking about?” Siwon asked. “This is your grandma’s mansion?”

“Then where is she? Changmin? Shin Ae?”

“Wha…what are you mumbling about?”

“The boat blew up! The boat blew up!”

“Yah! Snap out of it!” Siwon shook him.

“Oppa!” Yoona shouted.

“Do you know who I am? Do you know who I am?” Siwon questioned staring hard at his friend.

Leeteuk’s eyes became wide then he relaxed them. He dropped back onto the ground in a dazed manner. Tears welled up in his eyes.

“She’s dead. She’s dead.”

;;;;;

Zhoumi wriggled in pain on the floor. With knees up to his chest he painfully clutched his stomach, screams escaping his mouth. His mind flashed before him and he saw strange images of a crying girl sitting alone by a tombstone.

“For the last time.” a voice whispered. “I mean no harm. Please bear with it a while more.”

;;;;;

Leeteuk sat on his bed in a deep daze as he sat in a frozen manner. He didn’t budge nor could he feel himself breathing. Every past year of his life came flying back at him one by one.

He turned when the door opened. Zhoumi came in with a white towel draped across his arm.

“To cool you down I brought a cold towel,” Zhoumi said walking toward him.

Leeteuk stared back at him.

“Do you want to know something?” Zhoumi asked with a smirk.

A minute later Leeteuk stampeded out of his room and made his way up to the second floor. He found Siwon reading in his room. Seeing how relaxed he was Leeteuk felt anger surge through his blood.

“Get up,” Leeteuk muttered after walking into the room and stood by Siwon.

Siwon glanced at him confused and set his book down standing up.

“What’s…” Siwon started but met with Leeteuk’s fist.

Siwon slid onto the floor and glared up at Leeteuk.

“What are you doing?” Siwon asked getting up to his feet.

Leeteuk grabbed his collars with menacing rage, “Tell me what you know.”

Siwon frowned confused.

“Or do I need to beat it out of you?”

;;;;;

Taeyeon had just turned around the corner and was walking up the drive when she ran into Leeteuk by the front doorsteps. She glanced at him happy, yet worried. His stare did not reciprocate the same feelings. Taeyeon felt her heart hang low inside her chest.

“Come with me,” Leeteuk told walking pass her.

She spun around and watched as he made his way down the drive. After Changmin she wondered what could possibly be bothering Leeteuk. He took a long walk leaving her to trail behind. She was worried that he’d become angry with her…but maybe it would be just a normal couple’s quarrel. They turned with the bend in the road and came to a stop. Taeyeon waited nervously for him to turn around and face her and when he did his face expression didn’t welcome her care.

“What’s wrong?” Taeyeon questioned.

“You still have the guts to ask me that?” he didn’t sound happy.

What had she done wrong?

“Leeteuk…” Taeyeon took a step toward him but he took a step back.

Watching him do so pained her.

“You knew who she was,” Leeteuk told. “You promised to tell me when you found out, but you kept it from me.”

“Who are you…” Taeyeon began then stopped. She knew better than to play dumb with him. “Yea, I knew.”

Leeteuk stared at her in a way she’d hadn’t seen before.

“You don’t know what might happen if I told you.”

“And you knew what would happen?”

“I…” Taeyeon hesitated then her voice went quiet. “I didn’t know what she could do to you.”

“What?” Leeteuk ridiculed her.

Taeyeon didn’t know how to say it. That she feared Kang Shin Ae would come back for Leeteuk.

“She’s dead, Taeyeon.”

Taeyeon looked at him speechless.

“So you think she’ll come take my soul? You think I might die after her? Do you seriously believe that crap?”

“You’re just angry right now, so you’re not thinking straight,” Taeyeon tried.

“I’m in my right mind, but are you?”

Taeyeon didn’t know whether to feel angry or sad.

“You liar,” Leeteuk accused. “Not only did you lie about Shin Ae but you were just using me, weren’t you?”

“What? No!” Taeyeon’s mind spun.

Where was he getting all his pathetic ideas this time?!

“Because you were afraid to feel guilty so you tried pleasing me.” Leeteuk’s stare turned mean.

“It’s not it! You’ve got it all wrong!!” Taeyeon shouted. “I’m not like that! It’s because…”

“Because of what? You still have other things hidden?” Leeteuk questioned. “You didn’t lie. You are a very dark person.”

“NO! Listen to me!”

Leeteuk’s stare was penetrating.

“I…it’s…” Taeyeon couldn’t say it.

That his father had had an affair. He and Changmin had been pulled into their parents’ dramas without knowing anything. Both of them were not wrong with what they were doing. It was only because no one knew better. They were just kids…young kids…and still kids who didn’t know anything.

Taeyeon turned away helpless and closed her eyelids. She couldn’t say it.

“I thought so,” Leeteuk snorted. “Why don’t you go back and conspire with everyone else to go against me? Go back to Changmin, who you’re so infatuated with.”

Taeyeon’s eyes dropped to the ground stunned as Leeteuk turned around and disappeared down the road. She looked up to see his back going farther and farther away. Angry tears arose in her eyes…and during that moment she really did hope that Shin Ae would go after him.

“Unni!” Yoona screamed for her when she reached the mansion.

“What? Why do you sound like that?” Taeyeon asked.

“Where’s Leeteuk?” Siwon appeared by the doorway with his lips bleeding and his cheek swollen.

The sight of it terrified Taeyeon.

“What in the world happened?!”

“I’m sorry. I let it slip.” Siwon apologized.

Taeyeon glanced at the ground and turned around to look down the road. She wasn’t just upset with Leeteuk for wrongly accusing her but she was also upset that he’d beaten his friend up. What had gotten into him?

“Unni, are you ok?” Yoona’s voice reached her ears.

“Maybe, it’s my fault too.” Taeyeon muttered. “Whatever. Let him cool down. I’m sure he’ll return before the sun sets.”

When the sun reached its lowest peak in the sky Taeyeon paced back and forth anxiously in the living room.

“Are you sure he’s just not going for a normal stroll along the beach?” Junsu asked.

“Is there a beach around here?” Jang Hyuk wondered.

“Shut up, guys.” Gyuri scolded.

“Where do you think he just disappeared to?” Yoona wondered.

“Maybe he’ll be back soon and we’re all worrying for nothing,” Seungho supposed.

“What do you think?” Siwon turned to look at Taeyeon.

“I’m going out.” Taeyeon said after coming to a stop. “I’ll find him so you stay here.”

Without waiting for their suggestion or for them to break up into groups Taeyeon had rushed out the door. Her heart was pounding nervously. What if Shin Ae was really going after him?

;;;;;

“Wait!” Siwon called taking a step forward but around the corner Zhoumi staggered in.

“Guys…guys…” he stuttered falling forward onto the ground.

They all gasped and backed up in their seats. No one moved.

“He’s unconscious,” Siwon told after bending down to check him.

They all turned to stare at each other.

“What’s happening?” Seungho asked.

;;;;;

It was drizzling. His feet didn’t come to a stop. For some reason he felt exhausted. Shin Ae had unfairly died and after she died he’d forgotten about her. He felt sorry for her and for himself. The little girl he remembered smiled at him in his still memory.

“Leeteuk.” a light voice rang in the air.

Leeteuk lifted his head up and saw the same girl he’d seen ever since that rainy day.

“I knew you’d come. I waited so long.”

He remembered those words from the first time he saw her. And now he was able to understand what she meant. She smiled at him expectantly. Her smile was the exact same as he remembered it. Her long black hair draped her shoulders and her white dress fluttered in the rain with a kind of melody stinging the air.

“I waited for this moment. For you to come to me.”

“Shin Ae.” her name escaped his mouth.

“Oppa.” she took a step forward and another step forward getting closer and closer to him.

Facing her, standing in front of her made his heart soar through a deep cloud of memories. The little girl he’d left behind. The one who’d died in his place. Her face shone even under the darkening trees where they stood silently. His body felt like ice once she put her cold hand on the side of his face. A tear rushed down her cheek and he felt her ice cold lips on his before he fell into a world of darkness.

***This isn't really the whole chapter, but since it'd be too long I decided to split it up.