I didn’t feel like going to school, not only because I hadn’t gotten any sleep, but because of the chance of meeting Jonghyun. I don’t think I would be able to hold back my tears if I would see him in class, that’s if he went to school. But I didn’t want to take the risk so I told my parents that I felt sick and they bought it. They told me that they would make a phone call to the school and tell them that I was sick.

At least I wouldn’t have to deal with school or work today. Speaking of work, I only had one million won left to collect. But I weren’t too sure anymore. Would it be worth it, would he even be happy? I let out a loud sigh before I shifted around in my bed while trying to get some sleep.

It wasn’t easy when my heart constantly brought up the trouble with Jonghyun. I couldn’t understand him. If he didn’t like me back then why was he so damn upset about me and Byung Hun? Did he lie; Byung Hun. I let out a cry of frustration, why did boys have to be so complicated. Giving of those vibes that makes one believe that they like us, but then they shatter it with something else.

But if that was the case, then I weren’t completely innocent either. I had too given of the vibe that I liked him. I’d been around him as much as I could, I’d held his hands. And yet I was kissing Byung Hun, and to top that, in front of him.

Who said love was easy.

My mind started to play up the first time I met Jonghyun, the second day of school when I was in a hurry, and I barged right into him and thus making the two of us fall to the ground. He had looked so confused, so cute. My heart fluttered and I blushed while burying my burning cheeks in my pillow when I remembered his bare stomach. He’s the only one that has caused me to feel like this. And now I’ve destroyed it.

After spending yet another hour of just rolling around in bed I decided to get up and freshen myself up. A nice hot shower wouldn’t be wrong, though my droplets of tears blended together with the water as I stood there. My whole body felt weakened – exhausted and I had to make myself sit down before my legs actually gave away.

Why did this have to be so hard? Why was it so hard to just direct my love, my heart towards someone else, someone that actually wanted my love?

“Yeon Ah are you in there?” it was my father’s voice; quickly I cleared my throat and replied him with a steady voice that it was indeed me. I didn’t want him to hear that I’d been crying because it would only make him worried. “Could you come down to the restaurant after you’ve finished, your mother and I want to talk to you.” I don’t know why, but it felt as if something was wrong. I told him okay before I could hear how the apartment door was shut close in the distance.

Carefully I scrambled to my feet’s and finished off before stepping out and grabbing a towel. Swiftly I began to dry myself. I hadn’t taken any new clothes with me so I exited the bathroom with just the towel wrapped around me. But it didn’t matter because I was the only one home. Mom and dad were downstairs, maintaining the restaurant and Junsik was at school.

After fishing out a pair of sweats and an oversized shirt from my wardrobe I began to dress myself, I didn’t mind to fix my hair so I headed down. Soon enough I was greeted by both of my parents who motioned for me to sit down. Luckily the lunch rush hadn’t started yet and there weren’t that many costumers.

My gazes shifted in-between them as they too placed themselves down on a chair. An unpleasant feeling began to grow inside my heart, something was wrong, but what? I fidgeted with the end of my shirt as I bit my lip.

“We are worried about you.” my father suddenly broke the silence and I guilt fully looked away. They wanted me to tell them. But I couldn’t, they wouldn’t understand. How could they when they possible never have been in the same situation as the one I was in right now. “Dad I’m alright.” I tried to reassure him – them that it was okay.

But my red eyes, broken heart and my smile that usually would’ve been plastered on my lips gave me away. I wasn’t happy. Not anymore. “Honey, do you think we wouldn’t notice that you are sad.” my mother joined in and my shoulders sank in defeat.

They had noticed it all along.

“What’s wrong?” I looked up at them with tears rolling down my cheeks and sprinkling my shirt, I slightly parted my lips to say something. But no sound escaped, it stuck in my throat and I found myself closing my mouth. “Is it about a boy?” I nodded my head at my mother’s question. “I’m going to let the two of you to talk on your own.” I laughed inside my head at my dad’s excuse; he didn’t want to be involved when I talked about boys. There was no wonder where Junsik had gotten his ‘protect-his-sister-to-all-costs’ mind from.

After that dad had headed back to the kitchen my mother reached forward and I felt how her hand slid into mine before she squeezed it. “So do you mind tell me about that boyfriend of yours; Lee Byung Hun am I right?” more tears escaped my eyes as I shook my head. “It’s not him, I never liked him. It just happened, it’s complicated.” I ranted on and on until my mother told me to slow down. She looked a bit confused and I understood her, because I was too.

“If it’s not him, then who?” how was I going to explain this, about how we meet, was I supposed to include how he made me feel? I didn’t know what to say. “He’s Choi Jonghyun and he loves to dance.” I let out a low laugh over how stupid it sounded. But my mother only smiled at me, that gentle and comfortable smile that made me feel at ease. “So you like him?” I nodded my head frenetically.

There was a moment of silence before I began to explain to her how I’d met him. How cute and nice he was. I told her about his shyness, something that my mother found amusing because I had never liked or fallen in-love with someone like him before.

But he wasn’t like anyone else; he was Choi Jonghyun, the only boy I love.