Key watched the stars in silence through his bedroom’s window.

The sky was beautiful, even if it was so dark, there would always be those shiny, brilliant spots illuminating it.

Key’s soul was just like that sky, dark and shady…and yet…he could see two little stars in there.

7 months.

He couldn’t believe that 7 months had gone by already. This was going too fast and yet… too slow.

He was big. Scratch that, he was huge. And heavy. He had never felt so heavy before in his life.

Thankfully, his skin wasn’t damaged yet, he had never given it the chance to gain imperfections.

The blonde boy closed his eyes and let his hand rest on his belly, petting it, drawing imaginary circles on it. He started to sing softly, just loud enough for his babies to hear.

Doctor Jung said that they could hear him and kick around by now. It was a strange feeling, he was just so happy to know that..

He didn’t feel so alone anymore, they could hear him and he could feel them; it was…amazing.

Key smiled, he used to talk a lot with his unborn babies, and he wondered if they ever got tired of him.

When he was sleepy, really tired, he felt his babies stop moving, going to sleep too… he never thought that this was indeed possible...! He felt like he had a magical bond with them..! But this wasn’t magic…this was love, the strongest of the bonds.

But Key had a dilemma. He wanted his babies to come out, he wanted to see them, he wanted to hug them and kiss them but…what if he couldn’t make it through the pregnancy..? What if he…die?

He was afraid…so afraid…

Who would take care of his babies…?

Who would love them..?

He couldn’t die. He couldn’t leave them alone that soon. They needed him…

A small tear rolled down his face and he wiped it quickly.

He couldn’t die. He couldn’t.

Knock Knock

“Come in, Sally.” Key said, his eyes not leaving the sky.

He heard the door open but no one came in. Weird.

“Key…?”

Key’s eyes widened and he turned to the door in shock. “Ta-Taemin..?!”

It took him four months.

Key had hidden himself well. The question was…why?

That was the only answer he never got.

Taemin had an extremely busy life in those four months. Having to carry on with their decaying band and searching for Key at the same time wasn’t something easy to do. He had gotten a good amount of information from the drunken secretary on that night. Phone numbers, addresses…but nothing leaded him directly to Key.

Then he decided to do something that took him a lot of courage to do.

He asked to be dismissed from the band temporally.

Everyone went crazy with his decision and yelled at him, saying that they couldn’t lose another member. The manager went to talk with the director nonetheless and they ended up deciding to give the band a few months to start over.

Start over…

That meant no shows, no interviews, no press and no media. All they needed to do was to practice, get to know the member better and try to make a great comeback after those months.

On the very first day of their ‘vacations’ Taemin caught a plane to New York without the band’s permission. They went wild.

Taemin’s phone kept ringing, Minho shouting at him, trying to make him to go back. But he couldn’t. He never told them where he went either, he just kept telling them that he was ok, to don’t worry.

He knew that he was hurting his friends and that they feared that he would do the same as Key but…he knew better. He couldn’t tell them the truth.

If Key hid himself from them it was because he didn’t want to be found, so he needed to go alone or else they would scare Key away again…

During weeks Taemin slept in hotels, visiting hospitals and talking to doctors and nurses.

By the end of the second week, Taemin was literally crying with worry.

Every new information directed him to hospitals! Why?!

What kind of sickness did Key have…? Was he…no..! He couldn’t be dying right..? He didn’t have…cancer or something right?

He was getting desperate, so desperate that he ended up falling asleep in a hospital’s bench one day. He got lucky. He never expected that the nurse that woke him would solve all his problems…

Her name was Samantha and she did know a boy named Kim Kibum.

She had his phone number.

She had his address…

And before he knew it…he was in front of a cute looking Victorian house at nighttime.

He had found him.

He had found Key.

Strangely, an old lady let him in right after looking at him, saying how happy Kibum would be to have a friend to visit him. How this woman even knew who he was?

She guided him upstairs and pointed to a door, Kibum’s room.

His heart was pounding, a mess of feelings assaulting his chest. Worry, anger, happiness, betrayal… he had so many things to ask, so many things to say..!

He knocked on the door with a trembling hand and waited.

“Come in, Sally.”

Taemin couldn’t help but let out a content smile. Key’s voice…yes..! It was him!

Taemin opened the door and…

He didn’t really know what happened next. He just couldn’t explain what he saw...

“Key…?”

What…what was that..?

What…wait..

No, this wasn’t…real.

Key was in there, sited in a chair by the window and…he was fat… stomach fat…

He looked like he was...

Taemin’s eyes widened to the flashback.

“ENOUGH OF LIES!” Jonghyun screamed.

“Stop screaming…” Key sobbed, hiding his face with his hands.

 “Do you realize what you done to me?! I loved you! I was ready to give up on the world because of you!” Jonghyun stepped in front of him, grabbing Key’s hands off his face, making him look at him.

“Jjong…”

“And you do THIS to me!” Jonghyun sobbed.

 “I’m pregnant!”

“…What?” Jonghyun whispered, his eyes widening, taking a step behind.

“I wasn’t cheating on you…I disappeared sometimes because…I was going to a private clinic…” Key let the words came out in weak sentences, sobbing. “Because I’m pregnant…”

Taemin’s heart started to race like it had never done before.

Suddenly, he didn’t have anything to ask Key, all of his questions have been answered in that moment. It made sense. Everything clicked now!

The hospitals, the clinic, the nurse…and why he left.

“Key…how..?” Taemin gagged, his eyes never leaving the huge belly that his friend was carrying. How was that possible on a male? How?!

Key was looking at him in shock, tears running down his cheeks. “Are you another dream..?”

Dream..?

Key though that he was..

“I’m here umma..” He whispered.

He wasn’t sure what to do, what to say. Hell, he didn’t know what to think! He just walked to his crying friend and wrapped his arms around him carefully, making Key sob loudly against his chest, his fingers digging into his skin almost painfully, maybe afraid that he wasn’t real.

Key couldn’t be happier.

That brat had actually found him! And he was certain that he had left no clues for them to follow! Taemin sure was a smart kid…

He had just spent thirty minutes trying to explain to the maknae how everything started, how this was possible. Taemin wasn’t stupid, he understood everything he said right away, but he was so shocked.. He couldn’t blame him; he knew how shocked he had been himself.

He explained him why he had to live in New York until the babies were born, how dangerous his pregnancy was, and that the only hospital that knew how to help him was in there.

“Boys, I brought you cookies.” Sally entered the room and placed a plate of cookies in the nightstand.

“Thank you Sally.” Key smiled warmly.

The old woman wiped a tear in the corner of her eye behind her glasses. “I haven’t you seen smile for a long time now…”

Key smiled again, his hand never leaving Taemin’s, squeezing it.

Sally grinned and looked to the younger boy. “Did you came to meet your brothers?”

Key laughed, remembering that he had told Sally that Taemin used to call him mother. Taemin just stayed there, looking stupidly at the woman. “I-I don’t get it…” he said in his poor English.

The woman just chuckled and walked to the door. “I’m going to sleep Kibum, don’t stay up too late, you need to rest.”

Sally closed the door and Key caught Taemin looking at his belly again. He smiled. “Want to touch?”

Taemin looked at him in surprise. “Can I?”

“Of course dummy.” Key chuckled. “They have been kicking a lot lately, you may even feel something.”

Taemin’s smile was contagious; the boy touched his belly like he was touching thin glass, afraid to break something. Key chuckled and grabbed the younger’s hand, directing him to a certain spot on his belly. “Here…feel.”

Taemin felt a bump on the palm of his hand and gasped, moving away quickly. “OMO!”

Key laughed at the scared maknae, he was just too cute. He had missed him so much.

Key snickered.  “I wonder if they’re happy or annoyed because you interrupted their lullaby.”

“Eh?”

“I use to sing for them before I go to sleep, they like it.” Key smiled, his hands moving to his belly, petting it like he used to do every night. He had to admit, he was a sappy, proud parent, his children sure were going to suffer a lot with him when they grow up; if he was known by nagging, imagine him with real kids.

“How do you know?” Taemin made a face, putting his hand on the other’s belly again, trying to feel another kick.

“I feel it. It’s…difficult to explain.” Key smiled. “It’s an amazing feeling though…”

Taemin was all made of smiles, happiness bursting inside him, leaving a warm feeling inside.

Key was pregnant, he wasn’t dying, he was…as weird as it could sound…pregnant. His body gave him the opportunity to experience something that only women could. It was…a miracle.

“Wow…this is so weird…I never thought that you would be an umma for real…” he chuckled.

“Believe me, I wasn’t expecting either.” Key laughed, searching for a better position on the bed. “Argh…everything sounds great but you have no idea how hurt my back is..”

Taemin gave his friend a concerned look and then something snapped in his mind, making him stood up in a jolt. “Jonghyun hyung needs to know!  He’s going to be so happy! Why haven’t you told him yet?! Why d-”

Key froze at the name and his words rolled out of his tongue as icy as he could manage. “Jonghyun isn’t the father.”

Taemin shut up immediately, blinking in silence and watching his friend in confusion. Key looked dead serious, mad even… “What are you saying..? You told me that the picture was a trap…” he whispered.

“And it was. But he doesn’t want to be a father so he won’t. These are my babies only.” Key looked down, glaring at no particular place, hugging his belly in a protective way.

Taemin looked at Key like he had completely lost it. Jonghyun loved children! He remembered those times back at Hello Baby’s backstage when he just wouldn’t shut up about how he wanted his own kid. “How do you know that he doesn’t want to be a father? Of course he does!”

Key sighed loudly in annoyance. He hated to talk about this; he just hated to remember Jonghyun’s cold, cruel words. “He knows Taemin. I told him and he said horrible things..!”

“Wait…he knows..?” The maknae was completely confused now. If he knew…then why..? “When did you tell him? He said nothing to us…”

Key felt his rage increase. Oh, so he was that ashamed. “I told him four months ago… he-”

Taemin made a face and interrupted his friend. “No, no, no! That isn’t possible! Key I saw him! He has been miserable since you left! ”

“He sure didn’t sound miserable.” Key rolled his eyes, fighting the pain in his chest.

“It’s not possible.” The younger repeated. “He didn’t look like he knew anything. Maybe it’s a misunderstanding, maybe-”

“You don’t understand Taemin! He said my babies were things!” Key wanted to shout, Jonghyun’s words haunting his memories, making his chest ache. He tried to keep calm, breathing in a stable rhythm. “He told me to keep them…and to stay away.”

“It can’t be true. That’s not Jonghyun hyung.” Taemin made a face. It had to be something else…! He was pretty sure that the singer had got himself a depression after Key’s disappearance, he had never looked so unhappy in his life…!

“I thought about that too.” Key looked away. He just wanted to change the topic… Talking about Jonghyun always made him want to cry, and he didn’t want to cry right now. He had promised himself that he would never cry for Jonghyun ever again.

“What if it’s another trap?!” Taemin looked at his friend in despair. Something was very wrong in this story! Something was missing…!

Key smiled sadly and shook his head negatively. “It was his voice..”

The maknae bit his lip. “Are you sure?”

The ex-idol nodded. “I am sure and I don’t want to talk about this again. I’ll never let that person near my children.” He whispered, glaring.

Taemin wanted to scream. This was not right at all! “But he’s the fath-”

“He’s not. They only have me.” Key cut him off, starting to get pissed off. Why couldn’t he just let it go?!

Taemin looked down, feeling something break inside him. Key was getting angry, he knew that, and he really shouldn’t make a pregnant person upset but… “At least…promise me that you’ll try again one day…”

Key sneered. “I can’t do that.”

Taemin wanted to break something. Why couldn’t things be any easier?! “Key…!”

“I want you to be their godfather.” Key said before the younger could start talking again.

The singer’s voice died on his throat and his eyes widened. “What? …Me?”

Key gave him a small smile and nodded. “I can only trust you right now. And you’re…my bestfriend.”

Taemin stood there in surprise before smiling back. “I…ok. I will.”

Key sighed in relief and smiled again, his eyes shining dangerously close to tears. Now he could rest in peace at night… “Thank you. I’m so much relieved now…”

Taemin looked at him in confusion. Relieved? “Why?”

Key let out a sigh and readjusted himself on the bed, leaning to the many pillows behind him. “I was afraid that they wouldn’t have anyone to be raised with if I didn’t make it…”

Taemin raised an eyebrow slightly at this. What did he mean? “What are you talking about…?”

Key looked at the maknae in silence, trying to figure out the best way to tell the maknae what he was risking in order to let his babies live. He didn’t want Taemin to freak out. So how was he going to do it? Key bit his lip. “I had the choice to abort…because I would be risking my life if I accepted to carry on with the pregnancy… but I couldn't do it.” He whispered in a calm voice. This was nothing new to him, but it stull hurt to say out loud.

Taemin’s eyes widened and Key knew that the boy would start crying at any moment. Taemin wasn’t the one to cry, but he could see his eyes water already.

In shows, Jonghyun and him were the first ones to cry like newborns and Taemin would laugh at them, teasing them for being such crybabies. The boy sure was stronger than he looked.

“I couldn’t do that to them…I already loved them too much…” Key continued.

“Key...please….” Taemin whispered, a tear rolling down his cheek.

“My children can be my death.” Key had the strength to say. It was hard, but it was true. “But now I’m not so scared. If I don’t make it…please take care of them…” He pleaded, squeezing the singer’s hand.

“You won’t die…!” Taemin chocked out the words, feeling his head getting lighter by second.

Key managed a small sad smile. It was not like he wanted to… “I don’t want to. I want to see them, carry them, feed them…I want to love them so bad… but it’s not a choice. It’s…luck.”

Taemin pressed his eyes closed together, tears escaping his eyes, sobs forming on his throat. “Please stop…” he whispered again. This couldn’t be true!

Key ignored him, he needed to know the consequences, he needed to know the truth…even if it hurt, he needed to know. “I can’t send them to my mother. I wouldn’t die in peace if I knew that my children would be raised without love as I was…”

“YOU’RE NOT GOING TO DIE!” Taemin shouted, standing up in a jolt.

Key looked at the younger male in surprise.

The singer wandered around the bedroom for a while, wiping his tears before looking at Key again with bloodshot eyes. “Can’t you see it?! You’re strong! None of us would be as brave as you were! Quitting your dreams, running away completely alone, having to handle all of that pain and problems and still have strength to sing them a lullaby at night…!” The maknae screamed, new tears forming in his eyes. “You’re the strongest person I ever met…! I admire you…” he whispered, his lower lip trembling.

“Taemin…” Key whispered in shock, his heart suddenly feeling warmer. He was right…

“You won’t die. I won’t let you.” The younger shook his head, a very serious expression on his face.

Key smiled and opened his arms. Taemin rushed to the bed and let his head rest on Key’s shoulder, hugging him close. Key sighed and closed his eyes, petting the other’s hair and listening to his strangled sobs. “Thank you…”

They stayed like that for a few minutes, only cuddling in silence, Key rubbing Taemin’s arm affectionately.

That boy was growing up indeed. First he had managed to find him, which was not an easy task, he could be anywhere in the world…but he found him. And now…he gave him hope…something that he had thought that he had lost forever.

“Umma?” Taemin broke the silence.

Key laughed, making Taemin look at him with curiosity. The blonde chuckled. “Sorry, it’s just that word gives me chills now.”

Taemin grinned, chuckling lowly. “You’ll be hearing it a lot when they grow up. You need to get used to it.”

Key laughed again. Would he be able to do that? It felt normal when Taemin called him that because they were just roleplaying, just playing house, but…this was real. He was going to be called that for real. Would he ever get used to it?

Well…he had to find out.

Taemin bit his lip. “What I wanted to ask was…can I stay here?”

Key was shoved away from his thoughts and his eyes widened to the maknae’s question. “What? You need to go back, the band-”

“The band is a mess. The new member is ruining it…” Taemin confessed.

Key panicked. “What? SHINee didn’t-”

Taemin shook his head. “No, we’re not over…we’re…starting over. SM gave us that opportunity. ”

“Then you must be there to help!” Key scolded him. What was he thinking?! He couldn’t leave the band right now! Was he mad?!

“I can’t.” Taemin said in a very serious voice, sitting straight on the bed.

He couldn’t? What did he mean by that? Of course he could! “Why do you say that?”

The younger male turned to him, eyes dead serious. “I can’t let you alone again. I’ll take care of you.”

Key wanted to slap his hand against his own face. Hard. Instead he turned to Taemin and shook his shoulder. “Have you lost it?! You need to stay in SHINee!”

Taemin stood up again, escaping from Key’s grasp. “You’re more important right now. And they can do fine without me! They gave us months!”

“Still…”

Taemin let out desperate sigh and let his eyes fall on Key’s. “Please let me do this. I’m sure you don’t want to be alone again either...”

Key sighed and smiled, closing his eyes, head down. “You’re so stubborn…” he groaned.

Taemin smiled to that. “I’m glad I am. If I wasn’t…I would never find you.”

Key raised his head again and made a sound with his tongue. “I’ll ask Sally if she has another room.”

Taemin’s eyes widened and he gave his friend his best smile. “Really? Can I stay?!”

Key rolled his eyes, still smiling and nodded, making the younger jump on the bed, hugging him. “Thank you umma!”

Things are getting better no?

YES THEY ARE! DONT YOU DARE TELL ME OTHERWISE!

.....damn I'm tired.  I need to get a life soon.

.......

NOT! Writing is much more fun :D

YEAH! AND NOW U ALL CAN BE HAPPY CUZ TAEMINNIE JUST FOUND OUT HE WAS GOING TO HAVE SIBLINGS! (and that he's the older one for the first time in his life)