"If glaring can kill, Nancy's father might be bloody dead right now."

 

Taeha embark.

She keeps on noticing Yeonwoo's intense glare at the old man giving a speech in the podium.

Now that Taeha look at him carefully, she thinks she saw him somewhere but can't remember where. 

 

Yeonwoo just ignored her and continued glaring at the man she hates the most. 

 

How dare he! 

***

 

"Thank you so much for the very motivating closing remark Mr. McDonie."

 

He bows as he look at the crowd clapping for him.

Then his eyes landed to the woman not far from his right standing confidently.

It had grown a lot and beautifully...but it's glaring at him.

 

She looks just like her mother.

 

***

 

"Stop glaring Nancy. People knows his your father." Ahin, on another circumstance, must be laughing right now at the way Nancy look at her father. 

 

She seems murdering him in her head. 

Nancy just shrug. 

 

Ofcourse they would know. That father Ahin was talking about disown her publicly! Nancy thought. 

 

"Thank you for attending the assembly, everyone. Have a pleasant afternoon."

 

Both Nancy and Yeonwoo sigh when the MC announced the ending. Oh how they love ending boring stuff. 

 

Everyone starts to leave when a tall man in the exit stops both Nancy and Yeonwoo. Nancy got to the exit first before Yeonwoo. 

 

"What?! " The tall girl ask in annoyance. She's not really in the mood right now. And she's not the kindest when she's annoyed! 

 

"The day is not over yet."

"Oh ! Come on!"

 

This is really reaching Yeonwoo's annoyance bar to it's peak.

"I'm sorry but I am just following instructions Maam."

Ugh.

"Dammit!"

 

She can't escape this, can she?

"Fine! "

 

Yeonwoo takes Nancy's hand and took her to her motorbike.

Yup, she rented a motorbike for this whole week because car is so mainstream and besides, it's an island. Must as well enjoy the open air and free breath-taking views. 

 

"Wear this."

She push the helmet to the confuse Nancy and ride on. The young girl is standing there beside Yeonwoo while wondering.

 

Yeonwoo is already on her motorbike and started the engine. 

 

"What are you waiting for?!"

"Where are we going?"

"Stop blabbering and just hop."

 

Yeonwoo doesn't care if she sounds annoyed, because she is! Nancy just obliged to avoid pushing Yeonwoo's button more. 

 

She saw Yeonwoo annoyed before but not this annoyed. Did something happen? 

 

"Yeonwoo!"

The tall girl starts the bike almost immediately, startling Nancy that she almost fell.

The guard run to his car trying to catch up with the two. 

 

"Yeonwoo, what are you doing?!"

 

"Yeonwoo, drive slower! "

Yeonwoo didn't answer. The young girl hold unto her tightly, hugging her from behind.

This is familiar. Nancy thought.

 

"YEONWOO DAMMIT!" they took a turn that Nancy swore her feet touches the road. Wtf!

 

Nancy keeps on shouting for awhile to make Yeonwoo drive a little slower but the tall girl didn't even listen to anything she says. 

Nancy just give up. Yeonwoo must be really really annoyed and Nancy wonders why. 

 

She plan to stay silent for the rest of the ride. She knows that, no matter how much she shouts and complain right now, it will be futile. Yeonwoo is unstoppable anyway.

 

And besides, 
She's enjoying the ride. 

 

It doesn't matter if they're running so fast. It doesn't matter if they're riding for awhile now. It doesn't matter if the place they passed by is not familiar anymore. It doesn't matter if the sky starts to get dark and it even doesn't matter if it seems like the rain will fall out soon and they're still on the road. It all doesn't matter to Nancy.

 

Cause what matters to her now is this, her arms hugging Yeonwoo. Her warmth against Yeonwoo. This moment shared with Yeonwoo. Her heart and the familiarity of being with Yeonwoo, just... Her. Her and Yeonwoo.

She missed this.She long for this. 

And she wants this for a long time. 

 

And Nancy wish time would stop. 

She hug the girl tighter as her tears looms to fall.

Yeonwoo. 

Suddenly floods of memory came like waves to Nancy, she clutches her heart. She knows she misses Yeonwoo but she just realised now that she misses her that much. 

 

The rain falls even before her tears do. Nancy sadly smile at the thought of the rain. 

 

Hi rain, you and I and the girl I love is trapped in a moment again, aren't we?

 

A sob escape her lips. How can Nancy forgot that night in the rain?

"."

 

Yeonwoo turns to the nearest shelter she could find as the rain gets heavier and wind starts blowing stronger. She cannot see anything in the dark with all this combined.

 

Yeonwoo found a small bungalow beside a light house and swerve there. 

 

 

She knows awhile ago that they're lost. Though she really wants to go back, Yeonwoo lost track of all the turns she made.

She was too occupied by alot of thoughts, and Nancy behind her wasn't helping getting those thoughts away.

 

She take Nancy's hand after parking the motorbike and run to the bungalow as the rain slowly becoming heavier. 

Lightning flashed and Yeonwoo flinched. Nancy smile at how Yeonwoo is still surprised easily.

 

Yeonwoo look around and it's fine, the bungalow was fine.

It has roof and floor but only 3 walls. Nothing was covering infront, there is even no door to begin with. Just an open bungalow. But it is enough to shelter them for the night. 

 

Cold wind blows, they both shivered.

"Did you bring you're phone?"

She asked the young girl as Yeonwoo takes the helmet from Nancy's hand. She put it down and Nancy shakes her head.

 

"They took it awhile ago at the event remember?"

Yeah right. To avoid distraction and focus on the assembly my ! 

Yeonwoo thought. 

 

They're supposed to get it after the event but Yeonwoo run away, escaping the guards.

Dammit, so impulsive!

 

She sigh. This rain seems like to go on until morning. They will be stuck here!

Yeonwoo just keep on sighing, her brows twitched in annoyance and Nancy can't help but to get hurt noticing it. 

 

"Is it that bad? Is it really that bad to be with me?" Yeonwoo turn around to face the young girl. What did she do?

 

"You really don't want to be with me that bad Yeonwoo? "

 

Nancy's swallow the lump on as her eyes starting to water again. She brush the tears with the back of her hand. 

 She's already sensitive awhile ago at the ride and now this, Yeonwoo making her feel like she don't want to be with her. 

 

Cause for Nancy, she wants to be trap in this moment forever. 

 

 

Yeonwoo step closer at Nancy to calm her down but Nancy steps backward as her tears was now falling on her cheeks. 

 

"Its not like that--Nancy stop stepping back--Nancy!"

The young girl continued stepping back and was now outside the bungalow as the rain pours, soaking her.

"What the heck are you doing? Come back here!"

 

Nancy just smiled sadly seeing how Yeonwoo is so concern. It is really obvious, the girl cares for her. But why did she have to break Nancy's heart like this?

She cannot understand Yeonwoo.

"Nancy! You'll get sick come her--"

"No! Stay there Yeonwoo!"

 

Yeonwoo was about to step and grab Nancy when she halt.

Nancy is definitely crying in the rain now. Despite the background being dark, Yeonwoo can see Nancy's tears sparkling and falling along with the rain.

 

She felt Nancy's pain and that pains her more. What can she do?

 

"Nancy come here, please. You'll get sick because of that rain. " She said softly but Nancy didn't budge. 

 

 

"Make me sick? Huh, the rain did more than making me sick me, Yeonwoo" She paused. 

"It knows all my pain too. "

 

Nancy blinks and wipe her eyes as her sight starts to get blurry from the tears and rain mixed. 

 

 

"It was raining when I send my mother away. My bestfriend died when it's raining and you give up on me in the middle of the rain."

 

Yeonwoo's heart clutches. She had to hold at the nearest thing to keep her balance and mind sane.

Seeing Nancy like this reminds her the day she had to let her go. Nancy cried a lot that day. 

 

"I don't know what I found in you to be this stupid! God, I love you so much even if you keep on hurting me! I still ing love you even now, Yeonwoo. I still ing do!"

She sob. 

"Every bits of me still do. "

 

Nancy sobs harder and shivers in the cold. She took a deep breath and look at the girl in front of her.

Yeonwoo's worried.

 

"If this is my last night with you. Please give me a good memory with this rain.. cause how? How can I unlove you when you made me love myself in the process of loving you."

 

"Nancy enough..come here.."

"Baby, take me back please.." Nancy's voice cracked. 

 

"Take me back to the days you love me so much. I ing need you in my life Yeonwoo. Tell me what should I do for you to need me in yours too?!"

"Nancy..."

"I love you so much it hurts breathing and living a day without you."

Nancy now step inside the bungalow and cup Yeonwoo's cheeks. She don't care anymore if Yeonwoo will see her crying her heart out.

 

Yeonwoo avoided her gaze.

"Look at me please.. baby look at me."

Yeonwoo look and her heart shaterred at the sight of Nancy. Her eyes are red and puffy.

 

 

"What did I even do, Yeonwoo? "

 

"What did I even do to deserve this pain? "

Yeonwoo closes her eyes and look at Nancy with pain, as it's eyes mirrors pain too. 

 

"Help me cause I am so confuse. I am so ing lost! I don't even understand Yeonwoo, tell me what did I ing do?"

 

Nancys hands fall on her side as she didn't get any reaction from Yeonwoo.

 

Yeonwoo just turn her back from her and that angers Nancy. 

 

Her she is, being so fragile in front of her and all Yeonwoo did is turn her back on her?! Again! 

 

 

"Where did I go wrong in loving you Yeonwoo! I gave you all that I could! Why do you have to hurt me like this?!" She's desperate but she doesn't care. 

 

If tomorrow she wakes up and all of this is gone, at least Nancy had lived to the moment before it fades. 

Before she fades. Before Yeonwoo fades. 

 

"Stop ing hurting me! " Nancy shouted. It annoys her that Yeonwoo don't seem to care for her pain. 

 

"Nancy, I understand that you're mad."

 

"No! I am not mad! " Nancy is now fuming in anger. She cannot understand her. 

 

"I''m broken! I'm sad! I'm hurt! I am in ing pain! And you put me here!"

"I'm sorry " Yeonwoo bow her head with her back still facing Nancy. 

 

"Stop saying you're ing sorry!"

"It doesn't matter w--"

 

"It does matter!"

 

"It does matter, Yeonwoo. It does! " Her patience had left her. 

 

"You always say it's nothing! You always act like it's nothing! Pretending not to feel. You always tell me it doesn't matter but it does! Because if isn't, why are you hurting too!?"

 

Yeonwoo's eyes widen. That reaction is enough for Nancy to go on. 

 

"I know you're just as lost, and messed up and damage like me or maybe more than screwed up than me. I know what happened to you when we broke-up, Yeonwoo. I was there in the dark crying for you too. "

 

Nancy remembers those days of her hiding just to see Yeonwoo-- but in the end, she leaves too. Cause she cannot bear it. 

 

"Now don't pretend like it doesnt matter Yeonwoo. Cause you're in pain as much as I am too!"

 

Nancy forcefully make Yeonwoo to face her and then right there-- Nancy knew, what she's saying is true. Yeonwoo is hurting too! 

 

"If this is what it's like to love you. Take it away from me please. I don't want this love. It doesn't have to be this kind of love. "

 

Nancy thought she won't cry as hard as the day Yeonwoo left her but she did. She's crying hard. 

 

"What happen to us babe? What's wrong? Tell me what's wrong? What are you scared of?" She caressed Yeonwoo's cheeks and Yeonwoo shove Nancy's hand away a bit forcefully. 

Nancy gasp. 

 

"I am is what's wrong! Nancy, I am! And I can't do anything about it!" Yeonwoo finally responded and Nancy was taken aback. 

 

 

"Im scared."

"I'm scared of everything. I'm scared to move, I'm scared to breath. I'm scared to touch you! I'm scared you'll fade. "

Nancy's confuse. Why is that scaring Yeonwoo? 

 

 "I cannot love you again, Nancy. I cannot. "

Tears fall on Yeonwoo's eyes as she look at the crying and hurting girl in front of her. 

 

This is not easy, it is never easy! 

"B-but why? " Nancy asks in hoarse voice. 

 

"Nancy."

Nancy reached out for Yeonwoo's hand and hold it firmly this time. 

 

"I don't.. I don't know what's going on with you and I don't have any idea what is wrong. But bring me with you. Let me fight it with you.  Let me fight for you, Yeonwoo. " 

 

Yeonwoo take her hand back and avoided Nancy's gaze. This is tiring for Nancy. 

 

She's been reaching for her and all Yeonwoo do is shove her away and letting her go. 

 

"I-i'm sorry, Nancy. "

 

Nancy felt light-headed at the sudden coldness and got dizzy after.

Still, she look at Yeonwoo intently despite her harsh crying and desperate self. 

 

She's already burning in pain, she don't care anymore if she turn into ashes. 

"B-but why... " Nancy trailed off. 

 

"We were so happy before. And-and everything was so good.... "

 

"Everything was so good..... for you. " Nancy's brow raised at the reply from the tall girl. 

 

"And it wasn't for you? "

 

Yeonwoo mum and avoid looking at Nancy. She just stared at the dark nothingness, keeping her feeling at bay. 

 

The lack of response made Nancy mad and her head suddenly hurts from all the crying. The dizziness got stronger and Nancy have to hold at the wood wall behind her. 

" you, Yeonwoo. "

 

" you. "

Nancy lost her balance but Yeonwoo caught her. Nancy can see the worry in Yeonwoo's face as it slowly --slowly fades. 

"I don't know what your so ing scared of but I am scared too and I'm hurting but I never thought of giving up on you, on us just like what you ing did."

 

Nancy hissed. She's trying to stand and get away from Yeonwoo's grip but she's struggling. Yeonwoo help her stand and when she did, she pushed Yeonwoo away from her with all her strength. 

 

"I hate you I ing hate you. I hat--hate you... "

"I'm sorry. "

 

"I hate you.. " Yeonwoo hold Nancy in her arms as the girl lightly hitting her on her chest. 

 

Nancy give up and just cried in Yeonwoo's embrace, wetting her blouse. 

She's seeing the end of this but Nancy don't want it. She refuse to accept it. 

She wants Yeonwoo back. Can she just have her back, please... 

 

"What am I supposed to do to make it easy for you.." Yeonwoo spoke softly trying to ease the girl in her arms from her crying and sobbing. 

Nancy eventually stops. But her weight in Yeonwoo's arms got heavier. 

 

The young girl fight the darkness slowly enveloping her but she cannot fight it any longer. 

Her whole body hurts. 

 

Her head is aching so bad but it's not even half the pain of how painful her heart is feeling right now. 

"Stop hurting me."

 

Nancy muttered in her breath before falling and giving in into the darkness. 

 

The last thing she heard is Yeonwoo screaming her name but it doesn't matter now. 

 

Because when Nancy opened her eyes the next day after, she's in a familiar room. 

Her stubborn heart search for her at the small crowd in front of her but she's not there. And that's it. 

The first thing that comes to her mind now is how... 

 

How much she hates Yeonwoo. 

 

How much she loath her. 

 

"Nancy.. "

 

She saw the worry in Jane's eyes.

Nancy wonders why there's a few unknown people in the room but that doesnt matter anymore. 

 

Nothing matters anymore. 

 

She's just---- empty. 

 

She never thought she could wake up one day not hurting anymore, not crying anymore, not longing for someone anymore. 

For all she have now, is hate. 

 

Nancy heard it all. She might be asleep but she heard it all. 

 

And she hates everyone for making her look like a fool. 

She hates Yeonwoo, She hates Jane, She hates Ahin, She hates her father. She hates her friends. She hates everyone. She hates the world. 

 

She hates herself and her situation. 

 

How? How did it happen? 

 

How comes the person she loves, didn't just love her back. 

 

But the person she loves now..

is the reason why she lost all the people she loved before.