Eunhyuk POV

"Why, Donghae?  Why are you doing this to me?"

I heard the words escape my mouth; I heard how pathetic I sounded.  The emptiness and lack of feeling  that echoed in my ears and reverberated throughout my skull made me want to point at laugh at myself.  After making myself so many promises, after swearing that I would forget about Donghae, I still had it within me to care what he did.  I cared enough to experience the pain it brought me when I saw him in bed with a person that wasn't me.

The never-ending flow of tears ran down my face, clinging to the edges of my jaw line as I, too, clung to the edges of my consciousness.  My mind wanted to retreat; to pull back into the darkness from where it had only just emerged.  I couldn't face Donghae.  Not like this.

"Eunhyuk...I-I'm so-"

"Don't say you're sorry,"  I cut him off as soon as I realized what words were about to leave his mouth. 

I didn't want him to apologize.  That would only make my pain worse, knowing that he felt sorry for me; knowing that he found me pathetic enough to have to be sympathized with.  That, more than anything, was one thing I wanted to avoid.

I looked back up into his face.  In it, I saw everything that held me to the earth.  His warm, brown eyes; the eyes that were always so understanding and comforting in times of distress.  The soft curve of his lips; the lips that I had dreamed again and again of touching, tasting.  His muscular figure; the arms that looked so comfortable and welcoming; that arms that I had always dreamt of, cradling me in their warm embrace.

It sent my heart down into the deepest pits of my soul, just knowing that  the comfort  - which accompanied the indestructible hold of those beautiful arms - would never be for me.  I would always be hidden, overshadowed by those who meant more to Donghae than I ever would.

Yet another tear slid down from the corner of my eye.  Before it could break contact with my skin, however, Donghae lurches forward to wipe it away.  Where his flesh met my own, it left a flame; a spark of electricity that seemed to travel through my body.  His touch...it was so close, yet so incredibly far.

"Don't cry anymore, Eunhyuk."

His voice was comforting, and low enough to hide his emotions behind it.  Though the expression on his face was close to reassuring and worried, his eyes were guarded; passive.  I couldn't see through him.

"Please.  Don't cry.  Especially if it's because of me.  You're tears shouldn't be wasted on someone like me." 

His voice cracked as he uttered that last word.  I stared in disbelief as tears began to form around his liquid-chocolate irises.  He wasn't supposed to cry.  I was supposed to be comforting him.  After all he had gone through, after all he had endured, our places were supposed to be swapped.  I couldn't comprehend why he felt obligated to open up to me this way.  I had never done anything to deserve it.

"Someone like you?" I asked him, confusion coloring my tone.  I didn't understand.

He sighed and sat down at my side.  The proximity at which our bodies were aligned made my chest burn in pain and longing.  This guy really had my heart.

"I ed everything up," he said simply.  His voice was so desolate.  I wanted to reach my hand over to comfort him.  I wanted to tell him that everything would be okay.  I wanted to tell him how much he really meant to me.

"I messed up my relationship with Sungmin," he began.  My insides jolted at the mention of Sungmin.  Of course it would be Sungmin.  It was always Sungmin.

"-and was a complete to you, Eunhyuk."

Me?  He's worried about me?

Before I could react, Donghae leaned over and rested his head on my shoulder.  I could feel his head move in sync with his every inhale and exhale.  I could hear the beating of his heart.

My tears had stopped.  At that moment, I simply wanted to cherish the feeling of us, together.  The warm, wonderful feeling that seemed to infect my brain whenever he came within a foot of me.  I was so far gone, running only to Donghae, no chance of me ever turning back.

"You were in pain.  That's all."

It wasn't difficult to tell him that.  It was the complete truth.

"That's no excuse," he muttered, drawing his knees up to his chest.  His sneakers rubbed against the carpeted hallway, breaking the momentary silence.  "I...I hurt so many people."

You hurt me.  I didn't want to admit it, but he did.  Every move he made seemed to carve a deeper scar into manhood, and despite all that, I couldn't bring myself to stop loving him. 

I couldn't respond to his statement, and he seemed to take my lack of response as a silent agreement.  He got to his feet, my gaze never faltering; never drawing away from his face.  Now, it was pained, twisted in despair at the knowledge that I, too, thought of him as a monster.

But I didn't.  He was an angel; my angel.  I would do anything for him, and that was the biggest mistake I had ever made - promising myself that I would follow him to the ends of the earth.  Because when it finally came time for me to retract that promise, I didn't seem able to.

My hands curled up into fists, trembling slightly at the prospect of putting into action my thoughts at that moment.  I got to my feet gingerly, keeping my eyes focused on his.  Within the depths of his gaze, I saw helplessness.  I saw pain that I was determined to extinguish.  And I would do it, even if it meant I only acted as his distraction.

I drew closer to him, wrapping my arm hesitantly around his waist, the other hanging limply at my side.  It was my turn to be in control.  It was my turn to drive away Donghae's pain.

Not leaving any time for me to change my mind or for him to protest, I brought my lips to his and let my body take over.  I was inexperienced; clumsy.  I didn't know what I was doing.  The main purpose that ruled my every action was that I had to erase Donghae's suffering and replace it with enough pleasure to distract him for as long as I could.  He needed me.

I crushed myself to him, our tears mixing into a single stream, mouths moving in feverish synchronization.  His reaction wasn't unwilling, making my heart relax for just a second.  He kissed me back, violently almost.  His desperation - all the emotions that he had been holding back - seemed to be released in that one kiss.  We were one being, tied together by the rips in our broken hearts.  We needed each other.

I lost myself somewhere between where I ended and he started.  I couldn't think rationally.  The one thing I was absolutely sure of was that I wanted him.  My noble intentions aside, forgetting about the fact that I had just wanted to rid him of his agony, all I wanted was him.  All of him.

And he seemed willing to share himself with me.

Finally, we would know all the grief, pain, love, anger; all of the feelings that we had bottled up inside would finally come to the surface.

They would be the one thing we got to share.

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A/N: Aaaaaaannnnnddddddd that's Eunhyukkie!  Hm, I wonder what'll happen next...?  I always tend to surprise myself because I never know wher the hell this story is going.  I feel like a terrible author, not knowing what I'm writing about :P

I've been busy lately, writing "The Society" with Key-Umma and doing random one-shots and actually trying to finish homework...this is what I get for being a good student! *glares at trigonometry book, picks it up, and flings it across the room*

i think key-umma has had a really crazy influence on me....thanks alot, dongsaengie<3

hope you enjoyed this chappie! i'll try to update asap! OH, almost forgot.  I promised myself that I would get up to 100 subbies in the next five chapters...think it's possible?  I'm crossing my fingers...

Anyway, don't forget to comment and subscribe, cuz u all know how happy that makes me ^_^ LOVE YOU ALL~~~<33!