Bang YongGuk

I looked at Sujin run to the bathroom of the coffee shop and sighed. I made her cry. I was so pushy that she was crying. I took a sip of my coffee and waited for Sujin to comeback, eager to explain myself and excuse myself for behaving like  this with her. My coffee became cold and Sujin was nowhere to be seen. I was worried she ran away from the coffee shop and soon I spotted her walking back to the table with a defeated walk. I stood up.

«I'm sorry let's not buy any coat. I was way too pushy with you. I didn't realize how I was forcing you to accept this gift. Sujin, it wasn't my intention to make you this uneasy and sad, believe me. Let's just go home, okay ? »

She nodded slowly and walked to our table to get her bag. We exited the coffee shop together and walked in silence to the car parking and drove in the same atmosphere home. Sujin was looking at the landscape though the window.

« Are you very angry at me ? » I asked her. She shook her head, still silent. I wasn't used to that. Hana had pretty bad outbursts of anger, making everything break in the room if something made her moody. Cursing and yelling at me. I wasn't used to the silent behavior and didn't know at all how to behave, so I didn't insist.

*

She went to take a bath and I felt uneasy waiting for her to come into the bedroom. We had an pretty normal dinner with the girls. I tried to not make her uncomfortable by talking to her and she did the same. I suddenly gulped, is she even sleeping next to me ? I sighed loudly, feeling like crying because our relationship took this risky turn. Soon, the door was wide open, Sujin came in  fully dressed, her bergamote scent invading the room and sat on the bed.

I was puzzled when she took my hands in hers. « I'm sorry.I get super sentitive when talking about money. »

She took a deep breath. « I just … I wasn't broke YongGuk, I was poor, barely making it. If I didn't have help from others I would have never make it. That's how pitiful I was. So when I finished paying the hospital debts and reward the few friends who helped me … I took a lot of pride into being independant and saved money so no one would ever pay for my groceries  or my daughter operations. »

« But Moonah gets pension from her father, right ? » I wanted to make sure.

She shook her head. « YongGuk. No it's not the case. I didn't write his name on her birth certificate for a reason.»

I was baffled. Basically who was I to arrive in her life and throw money at her this way ??

Suddenly she caressed my neck gently. « I'm thanksful still. You took the time to invite me and offer me the dress plus the coat. I know you were only full of genius intentions. I feel so unpolite to refuse. »

«Don't worry I won't ever talk about this. You do you. » I answered gently pleased that her sad expression disappeared. I kissed her hand and hugged her. "I was so afraid you were going to leave."

She widened her eyes and suddenly stood up. « Gosh, let's go. »

She dragged me downstairs, took her coat and opened the front door. I looked at her dunk it in the trashbin with wide eyes and she came back at me with a smile. « I think that now I need a new coat. »

She was freezing from the cold in her thin pajamas and I rushed her inside, I toke her in my velvety dressing gown trying to make her feel warm. Her smile was wide and her lips crushed againts mine. I finally felt relieved from my worries about us. « Does it mean I can offer you a coat ? » I carefully asked.

« I'll accept it with pleasure but just ... no luxury brands ! » Sujin required me with a peck on my cheek.

I nodded. Love was all about compromises. We came back in our room and Sujin ran under the sheets. I came to hover her. « I feel better now. »

« Sorry for worrying you. And you won't be able to get rid of me, not this easily ! » She said, obviously not liking me talking about us breaking up.

I hugged her under the sheets and kissed her forehead. « I won't ever get rid of you. Stay by my side, Sujin. »

*

D-4 before the party, 26th of november, Bang YongGuk

Himchan insisted to have lunch with Sujin and I one day so we carefully waited for her in the restaurant he chose. He seemed nervous about her coming. Sujin arrived in the magnificient winter coat I offered her. It was a surprise for her. I chose something classical, that would rather go with everything, yet in a vibrant burgundy to compliment her pink undertone. She looked so glamourous with her coat that I felt so good she wore it everyday. She greeted Himchan with a smile and sat next to me. She removed her coat and looked around. « Ah we're getting jjimdak ? I love this !! »

The meal arrived and we all eated with fervor. We all loved this  and the cold weather enhanced even more the flavor of the chicken. « So you have a daughter right ? » Himchan asked carefully.

« Ah yes. She is the same age as Taeyang. In fact, Taeyang and her are bestfriends. » Sujin gently explained.

« Really ? You never told me about this. » Himchan complained to me. I shook my head. « I did. You don't listen enough. »

Sujin chuckled and soon Himchan cleared his throat. « Can I see a photo ? »

« Of course. » She took her phone and handed it to Himchan. He smiled. « Whaouh she's adorable. Her name is ? »

« Moonah. » I answered before Sujin had the chance to. This wasn't a really popular name right now. It sounded like the old korean names of our grannies or aunties and sounded particular.

Soon, the usual comment arrived.  « She have green eyes !!! She's an half-korean ?»

Sujin shook her eyes, not surprised to get the question. « She's fully korean, her eyes are hazel, they kind of change color all the time. »

I brushed her arm. "People must comment on her eyes all the time."

She nodded. "Yes, they draw attention on her. When she was a baby I couldn't walk in the city with her without anyone coming to me and asking me about her eyes. I hope she won't get cocky about them. But I can sense she doesn't know how to react to that attention."

Himchan held a pretty good conversation with Sujin. As we were putting back our coats to leave, he touched the coat of Sujin. « Gosh you have a pretty nice coat. »

Sujin smiled to me. « YongGuk bought it for me as a present. Thanks you. »

She looked happy putting in on, really pleased to have it on her. We bid goodbye to Himchan who had to head to court and soon went to walk around. « YongGuk ? Himchan is really nice. »

« He is.» I said. It was true. Despite my bad mood, he always sticked with me.

« You know him for a long time ? » She asked. She must have sensed our bond. At this point, Himchan and I knew each others so much that we get on the nerves of each others so easily.

« Since middle school. » I revealed to her. I took her hand in mine to drop them in my coat pocket. She laughed at the sweet gesture. We got coffee and had a walk around the neighborhood. « I have an appointement with Ms Kang, you have to go back to the studio ? »

She shook her head. "Actually I went to work early this morning, so I'm done for the day, I'll wait for you she has great magazines. »

I nodded shyly and drove us to the office of the therapist. This was a part of why I trusted so much Sujin. The therapist she told me to see, I clicked right away with her. She was so smiley and warm that I felt comfortable enough  to talk freely about my problems. She looked like a really nice Auntie that would talk to me with ease. As I entered the office, Ms Kang had a frown looking at Sujin and mumbled something. She suddenly smiled. "Sorry, I was thinking about something; let's start shall we ?"

We started the therapy seance and I told her about the little coat incident. My worries of being too pushy with Sujin. Also too clingy sometimes.

Despite me talking about my problems, today Doctor Kang had a soft smile on, like I was telling her some good news. She took some notes, and closed her notebook. « As I see, you have a lot of worries. But they are healthy worries. I think you've finally reached a step in healing. What about trying to switch to a lighter anti depressant ? »

She explained to me the procedure. I had to go back to the anti depressants if my bad emotions came back. Soon she looked at me with soft eyes. « Take a reservation for next year. »

« Huh ? ? » I was used to see her every two weeks, or every month if I was really busy. It was a great shock for me.

She patted my shoulder.  « I think you seem stable enough to come back only next year don't you thik so ? It means you have around two months to bear without me. As I said if you feel stuffy you can always come after 8pm or take a meeting. Do you feeel comfortable enough with those options ? »

I softly nodded and exited her office, she unexpectedely get into the waiting room of her cabinet and walked straigh towards Sujin. « Kim Sujin. How are you doing ? »

Sujin blinked a bit and stood up to bow.  « I'm doing great, Doctor. You recognized me ? »

The middle aged woman chuckled and pointed to her head. « I'm old now and have a lot of patients so it took me a while to remember. How is your premature daughter ? »

Sujin smiled. « She's fine now. She may be a little bit small compared to the children of her age but that's nothing. »

The woman her arm with a satisfied smile. « So you're dating my patient Bang YongGuk ? »

Sujin nodded with a huge smile. «I'm glad for you. Well, I have a next patient, just take care of each others okay ? »

We exited the cabinet and got to our car. I suddenly looked at the hour. "What about picking up the girls the both of us ?"

We went to pick our kids at school, and I greeted some of the moms already presents here. YongGuk coldly greeted them and I frowned. This is not the first time I see him get very cold and distant at school with the other parents. I grabbed his hands and looked at his annoyed expression. Surprised, I hided my hands in my pockets. We 'll have to have that talk together.

Soon, our grils arrived, holding hands. Taeyang jumped of joy seeing her dad here and Moonah looked at them hug, comfortably in my arms. It was time to spent a nice time together. We brought them to the playground and when we all became hungry, ate at a nice restaurant YongGuk picked. The girls seemed delighted to eat outside at night. After that, they started to beg to get some ice cream.  As usual, YongGuk parked his car at Nugget Nugget and he smiled looking at them clap their hands. « I wonder when we'll be able to eat ice cream in a normal ice cream shop instead of here. »

I laughed, while opening the back door to get the girls out. They ran inside the shop and I laughed. It was like our very first time coming here. I pecked YongGuk cheek  « Get ready to drink melted ice cream !!! »

We didn't wait long to get our half melted ice cream, the girls begging us to go and play.

« One day we have to tell them to finish the icecream. » YongGuk complained. I smiled and grabbed his cheek.

« I think they contributed to your gain of weight. » I said, eyes on  the clueless little girls playing on the playground, not minding us.

« Is it a compliment ? » He asked suspicious, freezing his movement of spoon getting the ice cream.

« Come on, YongGuk ? Of course it is a compliment ! I could see your collarbone a little bit too precisely and your cheeks were so hollowed after you got released from the hospital." I said, bothered that he even thought I could diss him like this.

He nodded, checking his collarbone and touching his cheeks. «I find my reflection more flattering too. »

« I'm glad my handsome boyfriend does so. » I said, resting my head on his shoulder. « YongGuk ? »

"Yeah ?" He said with a soft tone.

« Please finish my ice cream , I'm full. » I said, trying to be cute pushing the former cup of Moonah in his hands.  He frowned in a cute manner and drank his cup in one go before doing the same for mine. I patted his belly with a chuckle. « Good boyfriend. »

A grin was drawn on his face and he kissed the top of my head. «Oh I had something to tell you. » He suddenly said. I looked at his big smile. « Today Ms Kang told me that I did huge progress. I only have to meet her in two months and she gave me lighter depression pills so soon I should be able to stop them completely. »

I gasped looking at him and brought my hands to my lips in surprise. I was so happy at this moment. Sometimes he was really that moody and cold man he told me about but living together, I really took my mission to heart. Making him smile and laugh as much as I can. I jumped around and soon hugged him. « That's so great. » I gave him butterfly kissess on his neck, making him shudder from the sensation. This really made my day. I hugged him strongly and he groaned. He ended up giving me a kiss on the forehead.Then I realize the location we were in, Nugget Nuggets a place full of children and parents and blushed furiously.

YongGuk only winked at me and I genly slapped his arm, vexed. He chuckled. « Yeah. It's been 6 years of medication and I finally got better. I think the better medication I found is you.»

« YongGuk, you wanted to get better. I just arrived on the road. » I said, embarrassed by what he just implied.

He sighed. « I disagree. Your contribution to my healing had no limits. » He was referring to the little things I did for him. Tie his necktie for him when he's perfectly able to do it. Remove it  at night. Make sure he eats enough in the day. Make sure he had coconut cookies all the week at work. Go with him to his now advanced pottery classes and received each of his handmade gifts with excitement. YongGuk kissed my neck softly as we watched over our girls in the playground.

« Ya, people are staring. » I contested, grumpy. I already drawed enough attention on us for tonight.

He whispered in my ears playfully. « I really don't care. »

« Little brat. » I muttered under my breath.

« You love me. » He said, while pinching my cheek. I smiled, neither denying or agreeing to this sentence. We both knew it was the absolute truth anyways.

*

Bang YongGuk, night of the party, 30th of november

Sujin stared away in the car. « I can't believe you framed me like this !  »

« I didn't frame you. I just learned today that my parents would be here !» I explained to her calmly.

She sighed loudly. « So what, you bought the dress, invite me and then five minutes before it ing starts you remember that your dad, which is the foundator of the law firm and your mom the main investor are going to be here. »

I gulped. «  I thought they would have not done the way for that party. I told you my parents were on a world tour cruise. »

Sujin looked amazing in her dress, yet she was so angry that I doubted it was time to compliment her again on the dress. « I don't know if I'm ready. »

I brushed her hand, in a soothing manner. «Sujin, it's been more than a year we live together. Don't you think my parents want to meet you ?»

She shrugged. « They 're going to hate me. I'm sure of it. Think I am a gold digger. When they learn I have a child and they will tell you to stop dating me. »

I laughed longly hearing that. « Gosh Sujin they will never do that. They feel really lucky that our kids feel like sisters and are really curious of the woman that made me happy. They say I look glowy and radiant, even a little bit rounder. »

She raised her head. « Really ? »

« Really. They're going to love you for sure. Sujin, you're marvelous. » This sentence stayed without any answers. She was staring at the outpouring rain outside. I kissed the back of her hand gently, in an attempt to reassure her.

«I guess maybe it's time. »She mumbled.

We arrived and she decided to go to the bathroom first. I greeted everyone in the hallway of the hotel room taht the law firm booked for my birthday and sighed, hoping that the dress of Sujin was too tight and she couldn't escape by the window of the bathroom.

Well, another chapter ! I'll probably be busy this week so enjoy this =)