Jiyeon’s POV:

“H-hey. Next week the guys asked all of us to join them for a graffiti session back at that plac we brought you to, remember? U-uh, Taehyung and Jisoo will be there too. I’m not sure bout Haneul but Yoongi will probably drag her there so… do you wanna join us? I-I mean if you’re not comfortable with it, its cool. I can still hang out with you next weekend. I-it’s just they invited you too so.. and it’s kind of like a Christmas tradition.”

Hoseok’s question lingered in my head longer than I thought it should have and I felt myself tensing up once again.

How can I not be over him yet?
It’s been like what, 3 weeks?

They say if you want to conquer your fears, you have to first face it.

Face it I did.

And now, I’m right back to the place where my feelings for Taehyung first developed.
The Graffiti place.
The place where I first felt my curiosity for him, the place where I desperately wanted to get close to him, where whatever happened had him running off into somewhere and caused us all to be worried for him.
And mostly importantly, the place where I spiraled down the endless abyss of my feelings for him.

“Ji? Are you okay?” I felt a soft nudge on my shoulder, turning around to see a blurred out version of Haneul.
As it turns out, just thinking of the memories that transpired between Taehyung and I over the course of these few months was enough to get me all teary eyed.

I blinked back my tears and barely managed to choke out the words, I’m fine.

As we walked to the back of the van gathering our spray paints, Namjoon started delegating us to the different positions where we could commit our act of vandalism, or as I like to call it, expressing my feelings in the form of art, where the public could see it.

 “Come on guys! Let’s get to spraying! Hoseok, Taehyung, Jiyeon and Jisoo will go together to the back area, whereas Haneul, Yoongi, Jin and I will go to the front while Jungkook and Jimin shall keep a look out for the police.”

I shot Hoseok a concerned look since we were together with Taehyung and Jisoo, a pretty scene that I wasn’t particularly fond of.

I watched as Taehyung held her hands while she giggled, how they were just jumping around each other, hurting and annoying me with each and every of their actions. As much as I hate this surge of jealousy, I found no way to control it or to ignore it. Instead, I decided to turn around, away from them and started painting my feelings onto the nearby wall.

A little of red, orange and yellow.
The colors that symbolized the warmth that he gave me for the past few months.
Staring at it, I decided to spray the different hues of blue that I had, around the little colors of warmth that I had painted.
The blues, that represented the amount of tears I had shed for him, the blues that represented the sadness he had given me.
 

And that’s when I saw it.
The warm colors were in little specks of dots, whereas the blue surrounded the warm colors, turning it into a colorful abstract piece of pokka dots in a blue background.
It was only now that I realized, he had brought to me much more sadness than happiness and yet I’m still standing here, holding on, hoping that someday the girl beside him will be me, and not her.

“So.. beautiful.” His breath so close to me I could hear it, his voice so husky I could feel the tingles on my skin. My heart wrenched and threw a little victory lap as I recognized his voice, I never realized I missed him that much.
Never realized I wanted him to be so close to me, to throw me a bone and notice me, to acknowledge me and just him, allowing himself and I to have a moment.

As I turned around, our faces were so close that our noses almost touched.
Stumbling back, I felt my back slamming softly into the cold hard wall, all the while never breaking eye contact with Taehyung.

“Why? Are you afraid of being so close to me?”
 
With a slight tremble, I nodded.

“Why?” His face leaned in closer to mine, causing heat to surge to my face, making me blush like a god damn Pikachu.

As flustered as I was, the painting behind me only served to remind that I spent 3 long weeks, well 4, if you include this week, to forget him. I did not get so far, only to turn to putty by merely a few words of his.

I stepped away from the wall, moving myself closer to Taehyung, as if to challenge him.

“Well, aren’t you afraid too?” With each word, I took a step closer towards him.

 His eyes flickered, showing hints of astonishment.

“Afraid of?” He asserted his voice, turning our conversation into one that was of a challenge. A challenge to see who would back down from the other, almost like a battle of pride.

Taking a few more steps forwards, I eyed him challengingly questioning him,

“Afraid of Jisoo seeing us, afraid of ing up and losing her?”

The gaze in his eyes faltered along with his resolution to chall