“ah… morning again.”

Park Kahi inhaled the scent of a bright Tuesday morning, with cool air breeze passing through her face. She was again resuming her activity of maintaining a physically fit body with the help of running at least a few kilometers. Although she has a very good metabolism, it had already been a part of her routine to exercise. This would probably explain her toned abs that she proudly showed off every performance.

Kahi returned to We Got Married house to start making breakfast. It was already a part of her routine, to cook every morning and evening. Leeteuk won’t be up yet, she thought. he had a tough day yesterday, not to mention all the tears he shed that made his eyes puffy. He wouldn’t be doing any activities either due to the suspension so he will be in the house for the whole day. Kahi didn’t know whether to be happy because he will be spending a lot time with her or will she be sad because of the traumatic experience he had. It was a battle of mixed feelings.

Omelettte?bacon? kahi brood over what to cook for breakfast. She would love to cook fried rice too. Leeteuk once commented that she was good in recycling food.

But will leeteuk eat after everything last night? For sure he wouldn’t want to wake up just to eat or drink his usual brewed coffee. He wouldn’t have the appetite, adding to how picky he was to food. She has to make a plan to at least clear up his thoughts for a while. Maybe for a change, some breakfast outside the home will do. why not? He would love outdoor scenery.

Maybe she would just spend her time with him for the day and cancel her dance practice, her girls could understand. She just finished recording an album with them after all. She must plan a good activity for leeteuk to at least enjoy.

Kahi tiptoed the stairs and found leeteuk still asleep with stomach on bed position, his head covered by a pillow and the blanket she placed over him was still intact. She wouldn’t want to really disturb him in that state. He looked like he didn’t want to be bothered.

But then again, he must not be immersed with pity, kahi thought.

Kahi stripped both pillow and blanket away from leeteuk’s body, exposing him to a cold breezy air that creep through the windows. She was surprised that he just placed his arms across his chest and curled as if he was not disturbed.

“yah, oppa wake up.” Kahi said, nudging him in the shoulder.

Leeteuk turned around with eyes still closed.

“are you still sleeping?” kahi gently slapped his cheek.

“can’t you see?” leeteuk smiled, exposing his dimple.

Kahi’s eyebrows arched. Very typical of leeteuk to do the gesture.

“yah, get up, we’ll have things to do.” kahi said, pulling his hand.

Leeteuk slowly opened his eyes.

“what for, jiyoung?” he asked, blinking.

“breakfast outside.” Kahi winked.

Leeteuk turned his back on her and drifted back to sleep.

“yah, what are you doing?” kahi asked, shaking him.

“I don’t want to go outside.” Leeteuk mumbled as he covered himself with the blanket.

Of course he doesn’t want, kahi thought. he got caught with taeyeon because they went out.

“just think of it as a taping, no one will suspect.” Kahi said. They were still under the contract of we got married after all. Few more days and they will be both out of the house, except of course if they leave early.

“I don’t want.” Leeteuk said, hiding himself.

“aish.”

Kahi pulled the blanket away from his head.

“I’ll tickle you if you don’t wake up.” She teased in a predator like position.

“go ahead, I’m numb.” Leeteuk replied.

Kahi bit her lip. She didn’t know that leeteuk can be stubborn when he’s miserable.

“oppa, please.” Kahi said, tugging him.

“no.”

“I’m hungry, lets go outside!” kahi pleaded.

Leeteuk faced her again.

“kahi, if this is a plan of  yours to make me feel fine, please just resume to your activities.”

He hid himself under the covers hiding all but his hair and right leg that was dangling out.

“fine!” kahi kicked him in the hip and went to head to the bathroom.

Leeteuk threw away his blanket, opened up his eyes and sighed.

“are you mad at me?” he called out on her.

“oh no, not really.” She replied sarcastically. “im just here trying to help and all of a sudden I get ignored. How’s that for a life?”

He could hear the sudden flow of water in a high pressure from the faucet. Kahi must have immersed her face angrily on the sink.

Leeteuk massaged his head, stood up, and followed Kahi to the bathroom.

“go away, I’m about to take a shower.” Kahi said, removing her pony tail.

“kahi, I’m sorry.” Leeteuk said.

He took a seat on the sink, contemplating on his actions.

“are you mad at me?” he asked.

Kahi stripped off her sweater, throwing the piece to his face.

“you should have realized that a while ago.” She mumbled.

 leeteuk placed the clothes on the waste basket.

“yes, I know, I’m really sorry.” He said. “if you want to go out, fine. I’ll come with you.”

Kahi raised her eyebrow.

“really?”

Leeteuk nodded, yawning.

“are you sure? You look like youre forced.” Kahi untangled the ropes of her sweatpants.

“of course I am forced.”

“aish.” Kahi threw her sweatpants at his stomach.

“well, you know that im really scared to go out now with someone.” He confessed, placing another clothing to the basket. “but since you said that its going to be fine then I guess yeah.”

Kahi smiled.

“glad to know where you stand.” She said nearing him. She pinched leeteuk’s cheeks.

“im really sorry.” he said again.

“its okay, I forgive you.” Kahi said, tugging his arm. “now get out.”

------------------------

Kim taeyeon played the scenario again and again on her head.

“it’s a great feeling falling inlove with you, taeng.”

Was she wrong for sending leeteuk away? It was right for her career. A career that only involves fulfilling dreams and pursuing the fruit of labor: success. Who wouldn’t want a good career ahead? Plus its only a temporary restraining order, it cant be that bad. Leeteuk must understood that its for the best. Its also for his group.

But why does she feel remorseful? She really does not have any feelings for him right? Maybe she felt that way because of sending him away. But again its for the best, and he would really learn from that mistake of telling his feelings on the public. It was really brave of him to do that, but really silly in way because it can be the one that will lead him to his own destruction. She was sorry for him that he went suspension though. He is the best leader.

A policy is a policy, taeyeon thought. she must abide all rules to have a good career. Erase all the conflicting thoughts.

“yah, unni, you’ve been staring at your potato bread for awhile.” Yuri poked. “give it to me when you don’t feel like eating.”

Taeyeon realized that she was in the middle of their rehearsal, having a break.

“am i? just thinking a lot of thoughts.” She replied. “this bread is mine.”

Taeyeon went to eat a piece in full happiness, envying the snsd’s black pearl.

“you’re so full of yourself.” Yuri laughed.

Taeyeon smiled but suddenly went serious when leeteuk’s disappointed face flashed in her mind.

Yuri noticed her looking afar. She sighed, rubbing her leader’s shoulder. all the snsd knew what happened. Leeteuk’s manager hyung told them everything including the management’s plan of action. They were all surprised, wishing it didn’t happen.

“unni, aren’t you really going to help oppa get out of the restraining order?”

Even yuri agreed on the unfair sanction to leeteuk. Actually all her members are on his side, edging taeyeon that she was wrong for not helping him. Leeteuk really  tried his best to protect the snsd leader. Yuri was in the utmost embarrassment when manager hyung told him that the suju suju leader took the responsibility when they raided the suju members to their dorm.

“a policy is a policy.” taeyeon repeated, firm in her stand.

“unni, you know that its unfair that they put a barricade on him to get near you.” Yuri said while sitting down. “it wasn’t like he’s going to stalk you.”

“maybe she’s scared that she will be closer to oppa.” Yoona chimed in.

The tall snsd member took a seat beside yuri, wiping the sweat off her neck.

“what are you talking about?” taeyeon laughed.

What are they talking about?She kept on repeating the thoughts to her head.

“you kept talking about oppa the whole time after you two went out.” Yoona said. “it’s a sign that you were getting closer.”

“but since the agency found out about that, you put a restraining order to yourself.” Yuri added.

“the  puzzle piece fits!” yoona said, giddily.

Taeyeon shook her head.

“youre nuts.” She sighed, poking yoona on the head. “I’m not inlove with him or something.”

“I didn’t tell you that.” Said yoona. “see, you’re making conclusions on your own.”

Taeyeon rolled her eyes.

“rubbish.” She told her.

Yuri stole the barbecue stick that taeyeon kept on playing with.

“all you have to do is just to dig deep into that metal heart of yours.” She kept poking taeyeon’s chest with the object. “and maybe you can still find that you have a heart of flesh.”

“girls, im not inlove with oppa.” Taeyeon repeated her words to emphasize that she doesn’t feel anything.

“all right, if you say so.” Yoona sighed. “c’mon yuri, lets practice some routines.”

Taeyeon watched as Yoona and Yuri went to the center of the room, joining Hyoyeon. She touched her heart. it cant be that she’s inlove with him, she doesn’t even like him. Or was she just denying all this?

--------------------------

Kahi knew she couldn’t please leeteuk to the state that he’s in. she knew that bringing him to a fancy restaurant for breakfast won’t do the trick. But she was glad and surprised at the same time that leeteuk was paying attention by eating and responding to her sharings. It seemed that he really was sorry for what happened when she woke him up, inviting him to go. Leeteuk forcedly ate his food without any comment at all even if he was not in the mood to eat, simply just by acknowledging the fact that a beef and corn soup pretty much complimented each other. And as for the people noticing them? They all thought that they are having a taping together.

Kahi wished she could help him. She felt guilty of her mixed feelings toward the restraining order incident. At last he would be living without taeyeon for awhile and spending more time with her. but it seemed that the action would make leeteuk suffer more. She was after all used to his cheerfulness and positivity on things. and taking away someone like taeyeon who is his most powerful inspiration of all time? It would definitely used up all his energy for being dependent on her.

What to do? kahi thought. should she help him heal his heart until it aches no more? He really loved taeyeon and getting over a love isn’t easy just exactly what she felt for him. Kahi winced. She even tried getting over leeteuk once but to no success. His charm and over all aura really enticed her.

Kahi and leeteuk almost finished the day by taking trips down to Korean museums, just to ease the latter’s mind on the incident. It was a tiny success since leeteuk became interested with military soldiers fighting in the Korean war. Kahi knew that he couldn’t bring him to malls and cinemas at the moment, not when he’s still having a major trauma to a lot of people. Leeteuk felt that all his actions can suddenly make an impact to his career and to the person he’s with. Kahi really pitied him for thinking so negative in his life and wished that people would just realize that leeteuk is also human.

“where are we?” leeteuk asked.

Kahi brought him to an abandoned roof top containing only scrapped tin cans and plastics. There were also scattered ceramic plates, glass bowls and containers. The floor was a little bit greasy, the wall near the fire exit was covered with hideous vandals made by teenagers and the place smelled of burnt rubber.

“this is what people call a relief area.” Said kahi, picking up a glass. “see this?”

She examined the glass in a circular motion and threw the object to the wall.

“hey, what’s that for?” leeteuk was surprised at the sudden action.

“relief area.” Kahi repeated as the glass shards, twinkle in the moon light. “you pick up a trash and basically throw it to the wall. Its an old custom of releasing angst. You can even mention something while throwing, watch me.”

She picked up a broken plate, took a deep breath and screamed.

“kahi is a very cute girl!” she said while throwing the plate.

Leeteuk smiled.

“well of course you have to say otherwise.” Kahi said, embarrassed. “you say something that angers you and throw the object or you just simply throw the object and we’ll just read between the lines there.”

“is this a habit of yours, coming to this place?” leeteuk asked.

He began to imagine Kahi in her teenage years spraying some ink to the walls. It gave him an unexpected smile.

“ne, whenever I have problems this is the definite place to be.” Kahi said. “this is an abandoned restaurant so this explains why there were utensils and plate scraps.”

Leeteuk nodded and went to pick up a glass.

“pretend that you don’t see me so you can vent your anger properly.” Kahi said.

“im not angry, im just disappointed.”

“its still the same, its both negative energy.” Kahi remarked.

She took a seat to the floor, watching leeteuk.

“just pretend that im not here.” She said.

“yah, floor is greasy.” Leeteuk told her.

“don’t mind messing up your white pants!” kahi snorted.

Leeteuk took out a deep breath and quickly threw the glass to the wall.

Kahi wanted to react but she suddenly realized that she was not allowed to do so.

Leeteuk eyed a bowl next.

CRASH!!

“wow, this is actually fun.” He said.

He picked more plates and glasses, throwing them by twos and threes. By thinking of how everything got into a heap of disaster, he picked more and threw what he can break. It looked like the shards on the floor and the glasses that stuck to the wall even inspired him to throw more. He was so intent to release what he felt that he screamed at the top of his voice. Taeyeon on his mind, her sudden way of ignoring him again, produced a great pain to his heart.

“aish!”

Leeteuk felt a sudden great energy to pick up everything he can see, even if it was not a breakable piece anymore. He suddenly want to release everything he feels by transferring his disappointment to the junks he was about to break.

And it really felt good.

Leeteuk dropped down on the floor, feeling a surge of triumph over the things he did.

Kahi realized that he was already done. She stood up hoping to greet him with positivity on how he handled the situation well.

“yah, oppa, congr------“

Kahi stopped in her tracks, cupping her hand to her face.

Leeteuk wasn’t moving.

“are you alright?”

All she can hear were frantic sobs coming from his lips.

“jungsu..” kahi was quick to rely on his instincts again by embracing him.

“I’m sorry.” Leeteuk choked. “I’m sorry, It really hurts.”

It was his memory with taeyeon that made him completely feel at loss and wrecked.

Kahi sighed, rubbing his back.

“its okay, its okay.” She said, comforting him.

It was a painful sight for her to see. The last thing she wanted to see from him are his tears.

“does it hurt here?” she asked, touching his heart.

Leeteuk nodded as if he was a boy being asked by his mother.

“there, there.” Kahi massaged heart and briskly wrapped herself around him tightly.

“I’m sorry.” Leeteuk repeated. “its my fault.”

“aish, its not your fault for falling inlove and giving her importance.” Kahi said.

How she wished she was the lucky girl. She wouldn’t break his heart like what taeyeon just did.

-----------------------------

“home sweet home.”

Kahi helped leeteuk reach inside we got married house by watching his steps. He looked really tired just like the other night she saw him. Physically and emotionally drained, he looked like a complete disaster.

“hey, thank you.” Leeteuk told her when both of them placed their shoes on the rug.

“don’t mention it.” kahi smiled.

“I owe you big time.” He said.

“you owe me a date.” she joked.

Leeteuk managed to make a smile.

kahi looked at him, pitying the puffy eyes that grew even visible. If there was a saying that a person who cries a lot, cries a river, then leeteuk must be one of them. She missed the leeteuk yesterday, full of hopes, the one who was so happy because of being out of seoul with taeyeon. It turned out that just one girl could make a big difference in his life, turning to chaos. She must be really important to him.

Kahi shook her head and the lights.

You still have your last surprise for the day, she thought.

“hyung!”

Leeteuk’s pupils’ dilated upon seeing  heechul, eunhyuk, donghae and ryeowook leaping off the couch.

“what the?”

He was so surprised that he didn’t even had the time to blink.

“kahi noona invited us to sleep over.” Eunhyuk smiled, flashing his gums.

Donghae pounced at leeteuk.

“hyung, hyung, my very dependable hyung!” he sang while embracing him.

Leeteuk couldn’t help but to smile at the sudden sight he saw. Four of s actually came for him. Their presence gave him an additional comfort.

“Don’t make me cry again.” he laughed as he invited them over to sit at the floor. “this is so sudden.yah, donghae ah, sit beside me.”

“ne, hyung.” Donghae grinned.

“I have sojus, let’s drink!” heechul took out ten sojus inside the plastic bag. “were gonna get drunk!”

“oh, please. Just clean everything after you mess this whole place up.” Kahi said, rolling her eyes.

“don’t worry noona, I’ll clean it up for you.” Ryeowook winked.

He took out ten Tupperwares from an enormous bag filled with various Korean dishes.

“I brought snacks too, incase youre hungry, hyung.” The eternal maknae blurted.

“I must be hungry, my stomach’s flat.” Leeteuk said, showing off his abs.

Heechul made a face.

“aish is that necessary?”

Leeteuk noticed kahi hiding her giggles.

“I can drink, right?” he asked, referring to heechul’s drink.

“of course you can.” Kahi said. She suddenly turned to heechul. “please keep him company for awhile.”

Leeteuk stood up, noticing her sudden urge to leave.

“aren’t you joining us?” he asked, disappointed.

“nope, I got an errand to do.” kahi smiled, heading to the door.

Leeteuk followed her with a questioning look.

“its late.” He said. “where are you going?”

“just some place.” Kahi said, reaching for her shoes. “some person and I need to talk.”

----------------------------------

Kahi rung the doorbell thrice. She knew that she was not suppose to disturb anyone at the moment but she felt it was the most important thing to do.

It was so important that even a late night can be disregarded.

A blonde girl of about five feet two emerged from the door, rubbing her eyes.

“unni.” Her presence brought an unexplained chills to her spine.

“sorry for waking you up.” Kahi said as she looked at who else were awake.  “I’m looking for kim taeyeon, please tell her that I’m here.”