Haneul’s POV

After breakfast, the members were preparing to leave for practice. They have breakfast everyday at Rikku’s place and dinner at their place. I guess Rikku sshi is that close to them. I can see how the younger members depend on her for everything. From clothes to their packed lunch and even their homework. She’s like a noona to those boys and I can see how much respect she gets.

Its not because she was Daehyun’s girlfriend that she gets all the respect but because she earns her respect. I was helping Rikku sshi clear the plates and placing them in the washer. Rikku sshi who was standing beside me was suddenly being pulled and she fell into Daehyun’s warm chest. He leaned down and plant a kiss on her forehead before patting her head.

‘Take care. Will call you’ with that he caress her cheeks before leaning in and kissing her on the lips. He pulled away but was still inches from her lips. Rikku sshi nodded and beamed at him and he once again place a kiss on her forehead before leaving. I could hear the members teasing him and making weird noises.

Rikku sshi turned to face me and smiled before hitting me against the hips with her’s. I turned to look at her confuse while she beamed at me and help me with the dishes. Just like this, we were comfortable with silence. I would steal a couple of glances at Rikku sshi and she was beaming away while cleaning the place up.

‘Haneul ah~ You shouldn’t be staring at people. Its bad~’ she was pointing her finger at me with a no no. I blushed.

‘Haneul ah~ Lets have some girl talk?’ she asked me while taking both of my hands in hers. I nedded and followed her head as we sat down on the comfy couch made just for the two of us.

‘Haneul ah~ I hope you don’t mind using my clothes for the time being. *pats my hand* Are they comfortable?’ she asked as she gently caress my hair. I nodded and smile slightly. No one has ever asked me about how I feel, no one cared. After Omma died I have not felt such gentle touches.

‘Rikku sshi.. You don’t have to be so nice to me..’

‘Haneul ah~ call ma Rikku or Unnie! I don’t care *acting cute* You cant stop me from being nice’ with that she ended it with a pout.

‘B-but-’

‘No more buts! Unless we are talking about JYJ’s Junsu ~’ she said with a teasing smile. My eyes widen.. Don’t she have eyes for Daehyun?

‘Haneul ah~ Would you like to come with me to work today? The boys have a performance later at 5pm for music bank.’ She beamed at me, hoping I would go.

‘..Sure..?’

‘Yay! Come on you*pokes my nose* are going to help me make lunch for them later. Before that, lets go back to you house to pack your stuffs..’ she looked at me with those gentle eyes again. Like she was encouraging me to it. Its like she understood everything. I slowly nodded my head. Its time I face it. If appa does not love me anymore then whats left to keep in this relationship. When there’s only hate.

 Rikku sshi gently pats my head. ‘Haneul ah~ Don’t worry, I’ll be there to protect you.’ She pulled me into a hug and gently pat my back. Before I could even think twice about backing out, we were down at the street trying to get a cab.

All this time, Rikku sshi had been holding onto my hand while trying to get a taxi. I kept looking at my feet. I was nervous of what’s going to happen next, Im afraid of standing up for myself. I was deep in thought when Rikku sshi called out for me and opened the door of the cab for me and ushering me in. After which she got in, she told the driver my address. When u heard that I looked at her wide eye. How did she know…? Like she could read my mind or something,

Rikku sshi looked at me and beamed ‘Its on the back of your student ID card, silly~’ with that she pat my head once again. Why was Rikku sshi so gentle towards me and always know what Im thinking.

Somehow, I feel like she has known me for awhile now. I was tensed throughout the ride but Rikku sshi kept patting my hand to ensure me that everything will be fine. My heart slowly calm down with her constant patting and her warm hands that held mine. Somehow, a part of me was still worried. I don’t want to face them yet. Im afraid my heart wouldn’t be able to take the words that my appa will say. However some things you have to face them whether you like it or not. I got out of  the taxi first after which Rikku sshi stepped out.

Here I am standing in front of my house, a house that was once filled with warm and love. Now, all that was left was  only hate and loneliness. I saw the flashback of the times when omma would walk me to school or brought me shopping. How I waited for appa to be back with omma. How he would welcome me with open arms.

Those times, no longer exist after omma left. I saw myself standing there alone waiting for appa. How he would walked pass me without saying anything , giving me the cold shoulder. Then I remembered that day when he brought Yiseul and aunt home. How he smiled so happily after so long. I was smiling caused he was happy. I thought aunt would treat me like her own daughter but I was wrong.

I saw myself standing in the rain during middle school, aunt made me stand in the rain cause I forgot to bring my keys. She refuse to open the door for me and how she pretend to rush to me when she saw my appa coming home. I saw all the flashbacks of the things that happened to me, unknowingly my tears fell down my cheeks. I remembered all the hurt I experience. It hurt so much I thought I could die. It hurts even more when it was your own father who did that to you.

‘Haneul ah~ *wipes my tears away with her thumb* don’t cry. It will be over soon, I promise. Give me the key if you are afraid to do it.’ she smiled gently as she place her palm in front of me, waiting for me to pass her the keys. I collected my thoughts and shook my head. I have to do this myself, Rikku sshi has done so much for me.