Chapter 7

Taeyeon’s heart leaps when her cell phone lights up and tells her it’s Jessica.

 “Jessica! Where in the world are you?”

She asks because she honestly does not know. Jessica has been travelling to meet investors all over the world and hardly reports her whereabouts due to her hectic schedules and confusing time zones. Taeyeon would often ask her manager for updates, but not even he can keep track nowadays.

Taeyeon’s heart sinks when she hears a man’s voice instead.

“Hi Taengoo.”

Taeyeon does not like Tyler Kwon. This acute contempt started on the day that Hyoyeon first introduced them. He was wearing a salmon pink shirt under his business suit with more opened buttons than necessary, and his face was plastered with a pretentious smirk when he lingered too long during their first hand shake, lightly brushing his thumb against Taeyeon’s hand when he released it slowly.

Tyler Kwon was bad news. And Taeyeon, being Taeyeon, did not say a thing when Jessica told her that he had asked her out. She had falsely assumed that people would see whatever she thought was so painfully obvious to her.

“Please don’t call me Taengoo.”

She wanted him to know that they weren’t friends.

He scoffed and Taeyeon could almost imagine his lips shifting to form a lopsided smile.

“I get it. You don’t like me. But I’m here to pass on some important information. One that will affect you, the group and especially my girl.”

Taeyeon wanted to hang up. Half a minute of being on the phone with Tyler Kwon has managed to make her blood boil. She puts her phone on speaker and leaves it on her table, opting to sit as far away as she can from his voice.

Tyler Kwon takes her silence as a sign to continue.

“As you know, I have friends on the board. They think that Girls’ Generation has become… how should I put it… a distraction.”

He clears his throat and Taeyeon takes her keys from her pocket and jingles them loudly to remind him of her presence. 

“They did the math. It would be much more profitable to push all of you towards solo activities. And since all of you have signed to be under them for only the next three years, it would be most practical to start now.”

Those b**tards.

“They want to break you up. They’ve tried, subtly, but you and your members’ stubborn unwillingness to let the group go is making them desperate. They know that Girls’ Generation will not stay together if any one of you leave. So now they’re targeting Jessica because they think that her priorities have shifted. They are going to make her choose between her company and your group.”

“Why are you telling me this?”

Taeyeon now has her phone pressed so tightly to her ear it almost hurts. She realises that her pulse isn’t racing like she expected, but slowing down and she thinks it might stop altogether.

“Jessica doesn’t know yet. I need you to act first. Unlike the board, you know Jessica. She wouldn’t leave Girls’ Generation. You have to do the right thing.”

Taeyeon wants him to say it. She wants to reach into the phone and choke him until he spits out his outrageous demand.

Instead, he is silent.

She ends the call.

__________________________________________________________________________________

Tyler Kwon is a liar, she decides after her seventh shot of whiskey.

Taeyeon doesn’t even like whiskey, hates it even, but it’s the only hard liquor they had left in this local secluded, run-down bar situated an hour away from her dorm.

“I’m surprised that you’re being so careless, Taeyeon.”

The bartender comments as her fills her cup once again.

“Everyone here is too drunk from your low grade beers to recognise me. Also, it’s always so dark here that I doubt I even know what you look like in any other lighting.” 

“And there it is,” he chuckles.

She mocks his bar every time she’s here. If James wasn’t her stylist’s brother, she would be too terrified to have ever step foot into this bar. The lights are too dim, the people are too quiet, and the bartender is far too good looking to just be a bartender.

“Are you a pr*stitute?” she asks, and hopes he takes it as a compliment rather than an insult.

He smiles, pours her another drink, and takes a seat across Taeyeon. He picks up her phone from the counter and unlocks it, scrolling through her contacts.

“Who should I call this time? Tiffany or Sunny?” 

“Don’t. They’re busy. Call whomever you like. Surprise me,” she challenges him as she rests her head on the counter, eyes closing from sheer exhaustion.

Moments later, she feels someone tugging at her sleeve.

“Taeyeon unnie.”

“Go wake the others first please,” she replies instinctively.

She remembers the rest of the night in bits of muffled conversations.

“Thank you for calling me, sir. Could you help me carry her into the car?”

“Don’t mention it. You’re my favourite, by the way.”

“Unnie, you really shouldn’t drink when you’re sad.”

“Juhyun-ah, do you know what happened?”

“When we were in the car, she kept mumbling in her sleep. The only word I caught was ‘liar’. Over and over again.”

“I have no idea whom she could be referring to.”

“I think it’s serious.”

“I hope it’s not.”  

“Taetae, sometimes I really don’t know how to be there for you.”

__________________________________________________________________________________

Taeyeon wakes up the next morning and tries to sink into normalcy. She ignores her throbbing headache, removes traces of her bloodshot eyes with makeup, brushes her teeth three times till she smells like mint, and fixes her smile in the mirror.

“Too dramatic. It’s not even convincing.”

She turns to the source of the voice and flashes a wide grin, so wide that the act of holding it for mere seconds made her face hurt.

“You really scared Juhyun last night.”

Taeyeon wants to apologize, but she doesn’t. She feels like she had used up all her ‘sorry’s this week. She hopes that the word never loses its meaning, even though she throws them around like they’re worth nothing.

“I’ll tell you everything soon,” she says instead, deciding that this must be better than an apology.

Tiffany raises an eyebrow suspiciously and Taeyeon remembers all the times she had said those exact same words. She usually means it at the moment she utters them, but in time she would often change her mind.  She wonders if any of her words have value left.

Taeyeon walks towards Tiffany and gently pushes the side of Tiffany’s lips to form a smile.

“You shouldn’t lecture me on my smile when yours is really bad too.”

__________________________________________________________________________________

Taeyeon hangs up even before the dialling tone starts.

This is the fourth time she has been tempting fate. If Jessica sees the miss call, she would probably return her call as soon as possible. Taeyeon rarely makes phone calls unless it’s important. She believes that phone calls invade peoples’ personal space, demanding the recipient's immediate attention, often unnecessarily.

She decides to call Hyoyeon instead. 

“Is Tyler Kwon a liar?”

“Well, hello to you too.”

“Please say he is,” she begs, and hopes that Hyoyeon misses the desperation in her voice. 

Hyoyeon doesn’t.

“He lies to the media, obviously. But not to the people he knows. That’s why we’re friends. He might be manipulative as hell with what he says and how he says it, but it’s always the truth.”

Taeyeon grunts and bites her lips, afraid that her words will spill prematurely.

“Now, do you want to tell me what this is about?”

She shakes her head while Hyoyeon sighs aloud. It’s almost as if they’re having this conversation face to face.

“Don’t worry about Jessica. That girl can handle anything, even Tyler Kwon.”

Taeyeon holds onto Hyoyeon’s words like it’s a lifeline.