calling Stahrr
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Title(1/5)
The title doesn’t totally suit what your story is about— Stupid Love sounds more like a light-hearted story and yours doesn’t sound so light hearted. You should choose a title a bit more angst because that's the kind of vibe I'm getting from the story.
Poster & Background & Trailer(-/10)
Since there wasn’t a poster, background or trailer, I won’t take any points off.
Description & Foreword(3/10)
Where do I start on this…?
So, you pretty much flip-flop the description and the foreword— the summary of your story should have been in the description whilst your author’s note should have been in your foreword. Of course, I would expect it that you have an excerpt or something relevant to your story in the foreword before your author’s note. I don’t think I would have clicked your fanfic while browsing because if the only thing I see in your description is “Ahahaha :D YOOOOO (: Okaayh, my firstfirst ever fanfic is about IU and Infinite…”then it would give me the idea that you don’t know what you’re doing. There is no need for you to point out that this is your first fanfic in the description.
The character information you wrote— I felt— was really unnecessary. You could have just written her into the story rather than straight-out tell the readers who or what happened to each character. It spoils the plot of the story.
The description/summary of the story you had does not make any sense to me.
Plot(2/10)
The plot— I am not too impressed with it. IU goes to school with Infinite and she has a secret relationship (friendship) with Woohyun. She goes off telling Hoya and she regrets it so quickly that she runs away from him. Hoya tells Woohyun that IU told him, then Woohyun… goes to beat up IU? I really don’t understand. It seems too angst-y and like I said before, Stupid Love sounds like a light-hearted story not angst—just the idea of her getting punched and slapped by Woohyun made me cringe. Then you decide to have the others start to fall for IU too and well, I think by this point, it’s too messy. I would suggest it that you outline what/how you’re going to continue/write this story before actually writing it.
Originality(2/10)
This isn’t much of an original because I’m pretty sure I’ve seen similar fanfic to this.
Flow(5/5)
The flow was not too fast nor was it too slow.
Grammar/Punctuation/Spelling/Vocabulary(5/30)
I’m just going to give you some credit for at least trying to be use words that have a meaning rather than just plain out saying it. Other than that, everything was a mess— you had Korean words flying here and there, and your punctuations are wrong. You do not leave an open space after a quotation because it’s wrong and it looks like you don’t really care.
There were way too many capitalized words and it looks like you were just screaming throughout the whole story. There is no need for you to be capitalizing every word just because a character is yelling— there is a replacement for it and it is to exclaim. What do I mean?
“I hate you so much, Woohyun!” JiEun exclaims.
See what I did?
Overall, I think you need to ask someone to edit your chapters for you, or something.
Writing Style(1/10)
Not the best way to about in your writing style. I would probably suggest you try reading books to better improve on the writing style.
Overall Enjoyment(1/10)
My overall enjoyment— to be honest, this is the second IUxInfinite fanfic I’ve read and I’m not really feeling the ship. First and foremost, I don’t know the names or faces of Infinite, so I couldn’t imagine who was who and the individual personality just didn’t stick.
Total – 20/90
reviewer: vangbby
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