*ChangJo’s POV*

I was angry. Almost furious! How stupid can someone be? Stupid enough to fall for the same person… twice, without noticing it!

My forehead met the hard surface of the table in front of me.

“Everything okay?” a voice next to me ripped me out of my desperate thoughts. I shot up again immediately, looking at the blonde beside me.

“Not really…” I mumbled. “My boyfriend ran away.”

“The mute one or the guy hiding his face all the time?” he asked slightly amused, stuffing his waiter-notepad into his back pocket as I was the only customer in this café.

“Do I look like a player? It’s the same boy.”

“Didn’t you say that-”
“He tricked me.” I said shortly, cutting him off. “But that’s not the point.”

The blonde lifted his eyebrows as he sat down on the chair across from me. “What’s it then?”

“I believed him and thought I fell for two different guys.” Sighing I ran my fingers through my hair. “Why am I even telling you this?”

“Dunno… maybe because I asked.” the other chuckled. “But how come he ran away?”

That was indeed a good question. “If I only knew…”

The blonde nodded before leaning over the table a bit. “My name is Kibum… but people call me Key. I have a boyfriend myself and I know that you should search for him instead of sitting here, talking about it to a complete stranger.”

“It’s not that easy. Though I wish it was…”

Key leant back again, crossing his arms in front of his chest. “Good then… what’s your plan?”

“Well… I-“

Then, a ringing sound was heard, signalizing that a new customer entered the café. My gaze scooted over to the entrance door in the speed of light.

“Welcome~ choose a seat. There aren’t many customers here today.” Key was already standing by the door, greeting the new customer.

“Hello. And thank you.” As I heard the woman’s voice, my eyes fell back down onto the table. Disappointment was washing over me as I knew that it wasn’t the certain person I was hoping to see…

A brightly smiling couple came into my view, taking place at a table across the room. They were giggling and being all touchy and lovey dovey with each other while Key took their orders.

My hands were acting on their own, forming fists as I thought of Changhyun… we could be like that as well…

What made him ran away? Does he think I hate him now? Or was it just my friend’s intimating appearance that scared him? Or maybe L.Joe’s uptight blondie that forced him to leave as well?

Or did he want to go? Because he didn’t want to let his friends alone?

In the end friendship is more worthy than love, isn’t it?

My forehead met the table once more.

“Hey don’t give up on life my new friend~” Key sang through the whole café, coming back with two cups of coffee, handing it to the happy couple. “One day, everything will be fine. I’m sure about that.”

“Would be good…” I mumbled against the wooden surface.

Key came and patted my back. “I still don’t know your name, frantic boy.”

“ChangJo…”

“The table is glad to finally know your name.” he chuckled. I sighed, my own breath hitting my face as it was still pressed against the table.

Again we heard a new customer entering the café.

“Welcome. Please choose a seat~”

“Hello, I… I came here to meet someone…”

*Ricky’s POV*

“Guys we should try to sleep.” ChunJi said, turning away from Niel. The latter nodded.

Hearing the word sleep I yawed immediately, feeling sudden tiredness rushing through my body.

And just a few minutes later, the three of us were laying on the cold floor, cuddled against each other to get some warmth at least.

My head was leaning against Niel’s shoulder while ChunJi hugged his waist on the other side.

But still… Niel wasn’t ChangJo… definitely not.

Not that I didn’t feel secure when being with my non blood-related brothers… but being with ChangJo gave me such a strong feeling of safety that I now felt like standing in the middle of a huge flamboyance of flamingos. I hate flamingos. Long story…

A cold wind was rushing over us, making me shiver a bit. My hands felt like frostbitten… now as there wasn’t the strong, warm hand of my boyfriend holding it.

Wait… was ChangJo still my boyfriend? I mean… after what happened… he surely hated me…

Because… I myself wouldn’t want to have my boyfriend lying to me…

I shoved my hands into the pockets of my pants to keep them from falling off because of the cold.

That’s when I noticed something odd.

A small paper was sticking inside of my pocket. Where did it come from? I let it slide between my fingers for a few seconds before pulling it out, unfolding it. But it was dark. I couldn’t make out what exactly it was.

Taking a glance at my two hyungs, I tried figuring out whether they were already sleeping or not. Niel’s chest was rising up and down in a slow pace while ChunJi was already slightly snoring. So the eldest was asleep.

Carefully, to not wake the latter and Niel (in case he was actually sleeping), I crawled away from our sleeping place before hopping onto my feet.

A few meters away I spotted a street lamp, throwing a yellowish cone of light onto the asphalted floor. My hand was shoved back inside of my pocket, clenching the small paper tightly as I made my way towards the brighter place.

I sat down, pulling the paper out once again.

Just before I unfolded it to see what it could be, I recognized it as a page from ChangJo’s notepad. How could it land inside of my pocket?

I turned it around, seeing that there was something written on it.

I don’t understand this. You should’ve told me. Meet me in “our” café soon. <3

I gulped. He…

Suddenly I heard steps coming towards me. Out of reflex I quickly stuffed the note under my pullover.

“What is it?” Niel asked. So he obviously wasn’t sleeping before.

I hopped back onto my feet. “Nothing important… Let’s go back to sleep, okay?”

My hyung nodded and we went back to our cold sleeping place.

I huddled up against him, seeking some more warmth.

ChangJo wanted to see me… he didn’t hate me… he waits for me. A tickling feeling of happiness spread inside of my stomach.

But… when shall I meet him? He didn’t write a time. When did he write this note anyways?

Also… I couldn’t just tell Niel and ChunJi that I’m going to see my boyfriend. They wouldn’t let me as ChunJi hated the boys to the core. And Niel… Niel would most probably cry… because his man didn’t just forgive him that easily.

I knew that ChangJo’s the best! I nibbled on my lower lip, thinking about the past weeks living with the… yeah… the perfect man.

A soft smile rushed over my face but soon it disappeared again.

I couldn’t go.

My friends needed me here. I just couldn’t leave them alone. They’ve done so much for me before… it wouldn’t be right to just go to live with ChangJo happily ever after while they’re staying in this freezing cold.

On the other hand… I do love him.

I wanted to see him so damn badly even though it have been only a few hours since we saw each other the last time. I missed him already.

So when going to that café… he’ll be there? Waiting for me? Then I should go there tomorrow. To explain him why I didn’t voice out the truth.

But what to tell ChunJi and Niel then? I go shopping? They won’t believe it. We have no money.

Omo~ what shall I do?

*L.Joe’s POV*

Do you know the feeling when you hate yourself to the core? When you just wonder why anyone – including your parents – ever loved you?

Actually I didn’t know it… before this day.

But now that I do know this feeling… I would highly recommend to everyone to not do anything impressively stupid like I did.

I love Channie! So why did I say the things I said?

There’s no answer to that question, no matter how long I kept thinking about it. I wanted to be by his side from now on, not disappointing him for another time.

But obviously I did.

And now I wasn’t able to sleep.

I shifted my weight to the other side again, letting my face sink into the pillows while letting out a desperate sigh. And damn, the pillows smelled like Channie.

Everything did.

Groaning loudly I shot up from my bed again, grabbing the blanket and pulling it after me as I left the bedroom, shuffling to the living room.

I dropped down onto the sofa, switching on the TV. Distraction.

The first program was showing a romantic comedy movie… nothing I needed right now. Seeing romantic comedy would remind me of what I haven’t. My life was rather something like… an angsty love drama. Or a horror movie… or a thriller with splattering blood. AISH! It was just anything but good. A horrible movie.

I switched through the programs which weren’t even different to each other until I landed on some animal documentation…

For a few minutes I was watching how a small grizzly baby lost its mother because it was distracted by a butterfly landing on his nose. As the butterfly was gone, the little bear kept looking around but it didn’t find his mother. Luckily the mother also searched for her baby and in the end they found each other.

So not my taste when it came to TV entertainment, so I switched off the idiot box again, letting my head fall back while letting out another sigh.

I pulled the blanket up to my nose as my eyes finally wandered away from the TV and stared outside the big panorama window. It was already dark outside so the only thing I was able to see were the bright city lights coming from everywhere.

He’s somewhere out there… and it’s my fault…

“AARGH!” I groaned, now pulling the blanket over my head. I definitely should’ve kept my mouth shut!

My phone was buzzing.

With a slow, lazy movement I reached for it, seeing that I got a message from ChangJo.

Dude?

Hm? I answered.

… did you know beforehand?

I did

Why didn’t you tell us? Everything could’ve worked out so different from C.A.P being depressed, you being pissed and me sitting in a café for five hours already.

What are you doing in a café?

Waiting for Ricky… I don’t know about you but I do care for that boy a lot. No matter if he’s able to speak or not.

This may work for you but I don’t need a trickster in my life.

If you say so…

I say so! Now good night. With that I closed the messenger. But this caused me to face my phone wallpaper.

Without really intending to do so I let my thumb over the screen… over that picture…

It didn’t work for me like that either, ChangJo. I was just too proud to admit. Or too hurt?

Yes, I was hurt. Because no matter what I did… Chanhee wouldn’t forgive me.

Not that I really deserved his forgiveness anyways…

But I do love him. So his ignorance hurt me like hell. I tried my best to shower him with love during the past weeks… but obviously - no matter how often I told him – he didn’t understand.

I threw my phone back onto the couch table, only to regret is a second after as I saw the big scratch on the table… and the phone sliding over the surface, falling onto the ground.

I didn’t bother getting up to see whether it’s still okay… it was pretty obvious that there’s a big crack on its screen at least.

So… that was the second chance I always hoped for secretly… The second chance to get to talk to Channie… to get him back. And I screwed up big time. Again.

.

So L.Joe has indeed a sleepless night :/ poor thing... don't hate on him so much guys~ he didn't mean it. And poor ChangJo... what will he think now that Ricky didn't show up in that cafe?

Even this is a sad chapter I hope you all liked it since I put all of my holiday inspiration into it kekeke~ *watches the beautiful Danish coast through the window* It's so stormy here *-*

ANYWAYS thank you so much for reading, subscribing, upvoting and especially commenting~ I really wanna know what you have to say about this chapter and our story in general. ^-^ Thanks thanks thanks thanks~~

Luv ya~

~IHaveRuinedMyLife <3