22 August 2013

It was 7 AM when they left St. Angela’s College.

Kwon Jiyoung gazed out the darkened window of the car. His manager was talking to him, but his ears were deaf to the words. There were other things bothering him – mostly the lack of talent he had been met with at his alma mater. He had high expectations for St. Angela’s College, but somehow they were letting him down really fast.

The songs being produced in a senior level music composition class were worthless. None of them were into it. They lacked passion more than talent. Did they even want to take the class? Jiyoung had to wonder.

Maybe the age of dedication had already passed. Perhaps it was futile to expect anything from musicians anymore. They weren’t interested in making beautiful music, paving the way for the future of entertainment. Jiyoung pressed his lips together in consternation. His company had especially asked him to scout out talent or at least hard-workers, but he had been sorely disappointed. Of the individuals he met in that class, only two of them had any “star power” in the words of SME University – the next stop on his mini-tour of colleges.

SME had been boasting for the past few months about their ability to produce stars, even jokingly nicknaming themselves the “star factory”. Jiyoung wondered if they were just full of hot air.

“Was anyone good?” the manager repeated for perhaps the umpteenth time. He hadn’t had a chance to ask Jiyoung the night prior due to scheduling and phone calls and Jiyoung’s own lack of interest in the matter.

Mumbling out an incoherent response, Jiyoung pushed his sunglasses higher up and leaned back into the leather cushions.

“That bad?” the manager guessed.

“Not bad,” he corrected softly, “well, not really. There were two people…neither of them are composers though.”

The manager perked up. “Well then tell me about those two. If they caught your attention, they must be pretty amazing.”

“One of them is just an all-around,” Jiyoung murmured, seeing the tall, handsome young man in his mind’s eye, “he could succeed as a model, performer, idol, whatever – you name it.” He paused, conjuring up the image of a light pink head of hair. It was totally cool, by the way. “The other one, Kim Jongwoon…his voice is one of the best I’ve heard. His song was okay, but his singing is definitely amazing.”

“Would either of them be suitable?”

“I’m not sure,” he shook his head honestly, “maybe. Keep their names down. Kim Jongwoon and Choi Siwon,” Jiyoung stated, glancing at his manager through the dark lenses of his sunglasses.

***

Kyuhyun sat alone in one of the practice rooms, listening to his favorite artist, Sung Si Kyung, singing the song “Two People”. His headphones were turned down just in case someone came tromping in to disturb him. His foot tapped the ground, keeping time.

Wherever you want to go, when you can't find the way, I'll be with you
I will remember only you in this life

His voice floated through the room, low and barely above a whisper as he mimicked his idol. If there was anyone who influenced him the most, it was definitely Sung Si Kyung. Kyuhyun had modeled his own style on that man’s music, wanting to create ballads as heart-wrenching as the ones he practiced over and over again throughout adolescence.

Sometimes he wondered how idealistic the songs could be, but at the same time, how painfully biting they were. Kyuhyun liked to think that he was going to be with Sungmin forever, that he was being completely honest and true every time he said “I love you” to the beautiful boy.

But did he really mean it?

We will light each other when lost in the dark
Even if the dream that we're looking for in the future is not there
The moment we share now is more precious to me

If the present was all that mattered, then he would very easily say that Sungmin is the most important person in his life. Somehow, if there was no past or future and the present stayed the present forever and ever, then he and Sungmin could stay suspended in their supposedly perfect relationship until the end of time. No, if time stopped and the present was only the present, then that eternity would truly exist without any change.

Kyuhyun would relive the same day over and over again, the same moments multiplied by infinity, all so he can say that he’s happy with Sungmin.

But that’s not true. He isn’t always happy. He’s only happy when Sungmin is around. When he’s alone, then he’s alone. Kyuhyun clenched his fist, jaw tightening slightly. Being alone was his most hated thing. If there was a way to be with someone twenty-four-seven, then he would.

Loneliness . Being away from the people you love is ty. Kyuhyun couldn’t stop the jitters when he was alone. It didn’t help that he apparently couldn’t fit in with the snobbish brats polluting SME University. He had a way to parties and events and alcohol, but none of it was enough to make him happy. They were temporary and when he got desperate enough, that temporary relief was perfectly acceptable.

Sighing, he pulled out his phone, checking his text messages.

Unknown Number: Party this weekend. Free drinks if you’re hot ;)

Underneath that was an address and time. Kyuhyun stared at it for a long second before closing the window. It was probably a mass text.

His phone bussed again though.

Sungmin: Hey Kyuhyun…sorry I have to stay at school this weekend so I can’t visit you. I’ll see you next week okay? Love you

Kyuhyun deleted the message, irritated. This was his first week at school and his boyfriend couldn’t even come to visit him? They were trying to make long distance work, but both sides knew the risks of that. Kyuhyun especially knew what he was like. Little things set him off when he was alone. He didn’t like being alone and Sungmin was always leaving him alone.

That’s how his brain worked at least. Sungmin surely wasn’t doing anything wrong, but to rationalize to someone who thought in “Here” and “Not Here” was impossible.

***

Henry Lau gaped up at the large university center. There were stars all over the place and expensive cars filling the parking lot. He adjusted the strap of his violin case that was slung over his shoulder. his lips, he checked the address SME University had given him.

Yes, this was definitely the school.

His cousin, Kim Kibum, had apparently taken the liberty of mailing Henry’s audition tapes to the top music universities in South Korea – despite him being Chinese-Canadian and nowhere near Korean. He barely spoke anything and had barely managed to navigate his way from the airport to the university with the limited Korean he knew from talking to Kibum and his extended family.

Anyway, a week or so prior, Henry had received a letter in the mail with a plane ticket to South Korea and a note stating that they would like him to audition in person on August 22^nd. He hadn’t really planned on going, but when Kibum had caught wind of the opportunity, he told everyone in their family which resulted in the current situation.

He felt sick to his stomach, head spinning slightly from the sight before him. Henry hadn’t even started his first semester of senior year, which by the way, was starting the following Monday. His haphazard trip overseas was really going to through him off.

Why was a high school student even in a situation like this? He sighed to himself, troubled beyond explanation.

“Do you need help?” A faintly accented voice spoke near him.

Henry jumped, whirling around to see a tall young man gazing at him with worry. The male had a youthful face and a slim build, but there was something strangely alluring about his eyes. His outfit was loud, to say the least, involving many parts and accessories which through his focus.

Blinking, he quickly nodded and pulled out the letter he had received from SME University. “Can you help me get to the audition?” Henry said in fluid English before stopping and quickly apologizing, “Ah, I mean, uhm, where is this?” he pointed to the map of the campus attached to the back of the letter.

The man hid a smile, biting his lip in a rather shy why. Henry relaxed a bit, feeling less on edge to see someone so physically noisy had moments of insecurity as well. “I know,” the person nodded, handing the paper back. He pointed toward the building ahead of them, placing an arm around Henry’s shoulders. “Are you from America?” he asked, careful with his words.

“Yeah, from Canada,” Henry grinned, a little confused by the arm around him, but he decided to ignore it. After all, Kibum was always like that too. He had mentioned skinship was pretty prevalent in Asia. “Do you know…ah, Toronto?”

“Yes, yes,” he agreed quickly. “My name is Jiyoung.”

“I’m Henry Lau,” he responded, “Are you a student here?”  

He laughed softly, covering his mouth, “No…not a student,” Jiyoung shook his head. “Are you…?”

“Maybe next year,” Henry laughed, “still in high school.”

“In high school?” Jiyoung repeated, eyes widening. He suddenly felt self-conscious about the arm he had slung around the boy. When he had seen the confused male standing at the gates, he had thought it was maybe a younger sibling or one of SME University’s new trainees. However, it seemed like it was just a normal student applying for the program. Jiyoung scrutinized the chubby-cheeked boy. There was no way someone who looked like that was actually going to college in a year – probably sooner if he passed the audition. “Too young, too young,” Jiyoung clicked his tongue.

“No, no, getting old!” Henry returned, sweet face alight with humor.

“You? No,” he dismissed teasingly, leaning close to the cute face.

The high school student flushed, unsure if he was supposed to back up or not. Was that rude? Or was it weird if he didn’t back up? Henry was saved from the situation though as he heard his name being called out.

“Hello, are you Henry Lau?” a clear voice spoke from down the hall.

He looked up and waved. “Yes I am!”

Jiyoung loosened his hold on the younger male. The audition coordinator jogged over to them, bowing ninety-degrees to G-Dragon. “Ah, thank you for helping him here,” he spoke in Korean.

“No problem,” Jiyoung responded with a grin, pushing his sunglasses back on, “Can I sit in on his audition?”

The coordinator looked up, surprised by the request. He glanced at Henry who stood confused. “Well, that’s fine by all of us,” he said slowly, looking at the music idol, “are you sure?”

“Yes, definitely,” Jiyoung affirmed. There was no way he would miss this boy’s talent.