While Julia and I aren’t at the top of the food chain in Korea, it is exhilarating to be able to walk around freely, to not have to worry quite so much like I have to there. After paying and getting out of a cab I glance up at the apartment complex I grew up in, a modest little apartment in a quiet little neighborhood. Carrying my bags in I make my way through the familiar lobby, to the elevator, and up to the ninth floor. Pulling out the key to the apartment I unlock the door and open it, everything is well kept, and silent. I doubt my parents have been back here in years. Closing the door behind me I remember to call my parents to let them know I’ll be staying here for a week.

“Melanie, this is a surprise,” My mother says calmly. “Calling a little late aren’t you?” She says in dry tone.

“Sorry, I forgot about the time difference,” I tell her simply. “I’m in New York. I just wanted to let you know I’m staying for a week in the old apartment.”

“If you must, you’ll have to get all the utilities for the week, they’re only on when the cleaning ladies go through on Mondays.” She says airily. “And Meanie, do try to keep your private life just that.”

“Sorry, I know you hate having your last name on tabloids.” I tell her as I walk further into the apartment, the room is freezing, turning back around after locking the door I head down to ask to get the power for it. All the while listening to my mother lecture me about how indecent I seem to her group of friends.

“Mom, pretend we’re not related then. God, it’s not like I’m pointing you out as parents. It isn’t like they’d paint you in the best light either.” I say irritably as I make it to the front desk. “One minute, hold your snarky retort.” I tell her as I get the attention of the front desk, a familiar looking boy manning it. “Hi, I’d like to get the utilities for apartment 934, I’ll be staying there for a week,” I explain to the boy staring at me rather shocked.

“The Lui place?” He asks blinking a few times.

I nod my head. “My parents are aware of me staying here, Stephanie and Oliver Lui,” I say gesturing to my phone. “You can speak to my mother if you’d like.”

“No, that’s not necessary; tenants that leave for extended periods of time often leave a list of people allowed to stay.”

“Is Melanie Lui on the list?” I ask simply.

The guy turns to his computer typing in some stuff before looking up at me from his chair. “Do you have an ID on you?” He asks politely. Pulling my passport out of my purse I hand it to him to inspect. “I can get it in a few minutes,” The boy looks as if he’s debating on saying something before he lets out a long sigh. “You don’t happen to remember me, do you?” He asks after a moment. “We had the a few classes together before your family moved.” I watch him warily trying to put a name to the familiar face. “James Parker,” He says after a moment.

I feel my blood run cold. “Theo’s best friend,” I state curtly. “How have you been?” I ask politely hoping I won’t get any more questions.

He lets out another sigh. “Good, but I can tell you don’t want to talk, Theo did a number on you.” He says slowly, I nod my head. “For the record, I’m not friends with him anymore; I’ll go get everything . It should all be good by the time you get back up there.” He says waving to me.

I wave back leaving the lobby, as I get back on the elevator I return my conversation with my mother. “Go ahead; what were you going to say?” I ask my mother still in shock from seeing someone so close to my past.

“I was going to ask, why your father and I would be portrayed poorly.” My mother says in a disbelieving tone.

“Well gee, I wonder.” I say while shaking my head. “You both kicked me out once you found out I wasn’t the little angel you thought I was.” I tell her simply, gaining my footing back. “Besides, it doesn’t really matter, I’m not going to talk about it and neither are you and dad.” I say summing up the conversation.

“Melanie,” My mother says in a stern tone. “You were out of control and still are. You weren’t thinking straight about how you made our family look.”

“And you weren’t thinking about how much it hurt to be tossed out, look I’m gonna go, you can get some rest.” I tell her ending the conversation. “As always, it’s nice to catch up.” I tell my mother quietly.

“Melanie, your father and I do care, but you make it difficult when you refuse us.” She says simply. “Take care.” She says hanging up.

Grabbing the tablet out of my purse I turn on the lights, and switch the heater on. I click on Dohyun’s skype name. Waiting for him to answer, and then for the connection to go through I give him a quick wave. “I just got settled in.” I explain calmly, “How pissed is Julia?” I ask worriedly.

“Not really angry, more worried.” Dohyun says simply. “Where are you staying?” He asks moving on, obviously going to leave me with calling her to get anything on her feelings towards me and my sudden leave.

“My family’s apartment here in the city, I listed the address on some form for my American address.” I tell him calmly. “I’m probably just going to stay in for the day, bit too tired to do anything else.” I say glancing around the familiar living room.

“Alright, well you should give Julia a call, she’s pretty worried.” Dohyun says after a moment. “Melody, get some rest, you really do deserve it.”

“I’ll try, thank you Oppa.” I say before hanging up. Clicking on Julia’s name next, she doesn’t take nearly as long to answer. “Unnie,” I say as her face comes on the screen. “I’m sorry.”

Julia shakes her head smiling at me in a sad sort of way. “Your voicemail was enough,” She says with a small sigh. “I’m just glad you’re safe.”

“I’m going to assume everyone knows I ran off.” I say looking down at my lap for a moment. “I will be back.”

“I know,” Julia says easily and full of trust. “Can I ask what happened?” She asks slowly. “Or is it better left unsaid?”

“Mark and I had a rather enlightening conversation.” I explain biting my lip. “We need to look into breaking up.” I say feeling my eyes tear up. “Unnie, I gave him his song.”

Julia frowns. “Melody, I think there is a misunderstanding between you two. And I’m saying it because you both have gotten so close so it doesn’t make any sense that this happened.” She says pouting slightly. “Mel, you need to give Junhyung and Nichkhun a call, Nichkhun came by after Jackson called him actually.”

“Looking to see if I’d stayed.” I say knowingly. Julia nods her head, giving me an odd look. “What?”

Julia bites her lip for a moment before speaking, something uncharacteristic, just because she always says whatever she thinks. “Did something else happen, you kinda look…shocked, like something a bit more recent than this whole Mark-debacle.”

“I ran into one of Theo’s old friends, he works at the front desk, but it really isn’t anything,” I say simply. “I’m more surprised that I ran into someone I knew from before I moved is all.” I say while shrugging my shoulders. “Anyways, it’s late for you, get some rest, we’ll catch up when I get back home with you.”

“I know it’s silly, but I’m so relieved that you called home here.” Julia says giving me a small smile. “Nichkhun asked me if I thought you’d come back.”

“What did you say?” I ask curiously.

Julia again bites her lip. “I said you’d come back, but it’s more what I thought, that’s what I want to tell you.” Julia says cryptically before looking off screen and then back at me. “Mel, if you stayed you could get away from all the paparazzi, crazy anti-fans, from everything that’s happening here in Seoul that’s hurting you. You could get away from it all.”

I blink my eyes a few times. “The thought never crossed my mind,” I tell her simply. “Julia, I’m going to come back, I’m going to sort out everything, and probably one day I will leave, but it won’t be anytime soon.”

“I just want you to be happy.”

I look down at my lap, the sentiment hurting my chest more than it should. “That might take me a while to do, no matter what I do.”

“Well, just check in with Junhyung and Nichkhun before you go do whatever it is you’re going to do.” Julia says giving me a smile. “I love you Mel, I’ll see you soon.”

“I love you too Jules,” I say smiling in return.

Julia ends the call; part of me thinks it is because she is angry with me, the other part thinks it’s because she doesn’t want to cry.

I finish doing all check-ins before setting the tablet aside, tired from the small exertion. Getting up, the room having warmed up considerably, I walk through the apartment, stopping to put my luggage in my old room.

Being in here is so strange and just because it’s like stepping back in time. I note that there aren’t any obvious personal touches to my room, that it is how my mother wanted it while I was growing up, it isn’t until you take a closer look at the CDs and books that I see what I liked, my influences, flaws, all of it.

~~~

“You’ve been turning that over in your hands since Julia left yesterday.” Jackson says pointing to the flash drive I’m currently considering, have been considering. “What is it?”

“Something Melody gave me, I’m not sure I should listen to it or not.” I admit quietly, Jackson in particular is extremely upset with me. “It’s a song she made for me, something she said I’d understand.”

“Then you should listen to it. Julia says she’s never written a whole song for someone before, that it’s usually just a mixture of things and people,” He says watching me as I hold the usb in my hand gently. “Mark, what happened? Things were going so well, at least we all thought so.” He asks quietly, so much so I’m not sure he’s said anything.

I glance over to my roommate, him staring at me worriedly. “I started weighing the risks and I dodged.” I say frowning; wishing I’d just kept my mouth shut, wishing I hadn’t hurt Melody like this. I never thought that this would have happened, I thought she’d pull back quietly, that I’d get to see small glimpses of her as she continues on with her life, that I wouldn’t really be cut off like I am.

“Just listen to it.” Jackson says getting up, pausing a moment before leaving the room Jackson looks back at me. “We’re worried about you too, Mark, we want you both to be happy.” He says sincerely before leaving me alone.

Pulling my laptop out and making sure to plug in my headphones and that the volume won’t deafen me, I insert the usb nervously. Clicking on the folder where Melody has stored the song I see the title and why she didn’t want to tell me what it’s called. Flight Risk, she has two versions of it.

Playing the first one I’m surprised when I hear Melody talking, but not really saying anything in particular, more like it’s just a life shot of her recording the song. The second version is the finished product, and it’s amazing. I recognize the tune as one she’d been very focused on for a while, something she’d spent endless hours tweaking and then dismissing anyone from looking at it.

The song is about our relationship how we’ve developed from arguing and that there hadn’t been any sort of risk for either of us at that point. The risk hadn’t come until we started getting along, and finally that the risk of leaving was far too great compared to staying on board, with a steady piolet.

Pulling my headphones out, I lean back and let out a shallow breath. “Well?” Jackson asks having come back into the room. “How was it?”

I glance over at him and smile. “Probably the best song I’ve ever listened to,” I tell him easily. “When does she get back?”

“On the tenth, she’ll be back sometime on the tenth.” Jackson answers while watching me with a wary look on his face. “She might not want to see you.”

“I’m gonna try anyways.” I tell him without even hesitating, confidently. “I’ve got to try.”

Jackson sits back down on his bed. “Julia is furious with you; Cheonmi says that you’re lucky she left when she did yesterday.”

I nod my head in agreement. Julia and Melody both share a rather dominating sort of presence, so when they’re fired up and angry you can feel it fill up the entire room, Julia though yesterday, I’ve never seen her so vexed, not that I don’t understand, because I do. I drove her best friend to leave the country without saying a word to anyone else. “I made a mistake.”

“So what are you going to do to fix it?” Jackson asks simply and rather curiously. “Julia has no idea what time Mel will be back, and even then, she probably won’t want to see you after whatever it is you two talked about.” Jackson says listing off all the numerous things I have to work around. “And even then if you can manage to talk to her you have to get through Julia.”

“Right,” I mutter as I lean forward trying to think of a way to get Melody on her own, because there isn’t any way Julia will let me talk to her, at least not right away.

“Not to mention you have to survive Nichkhun for a week.” Jackson adds on.

I nod my head agreeing with everything, “Wait, what?” I ask looking up confused. “Surviving Nichkhun-Hyung?” I ask not at all understanding.

“I told hyung, well called to see if Melody had gone to see him, and when he said that she hadn’t he wanted to know what was going on.” Jackson explains easily, though he does look a bit troubled by this, probably not nearly as much as I do. “He was pretty furious when he found out she left randomly like that.”

I can’t even manage to glare at him, Jackson was just trying to find Melody, trying to see if anyone had any idea why she left or if maybe she changed her mind. “Okay, so surviving Nichkhun and Julia, and attempting to talk to Melody when she gets back in six days.”

“Yup,” Jackson says easily. “By the way, hyung is sitting out in the living room waiting to talk to you.” He adds on lying down rather comfortably on his bed.

Jolting up I throw a pillow at his face. “Thanks, you’re some friend.” I tell him as I run out to the living room, as I get out there I see a rather tense situation, Nichkhun looking around angrily and my group mates all watching nervously. “Sorry, Jackson just told me you were here Sunbae.” I say opting to go with honorifics verse the casual and respectful way.

“Get your shoes on; we have something to talk about.” Nichkhun says simply leading the way out; I quickly slip my shoes on following behind him. It isn’t until we’re in his car that he speaks again. “Do you know what’s in New York City for Melody?”

I blink, not expecting that particular question. “No, I don’t.” I answer feeling like Nichkhun is going to make a full circle with this question and I’m going to end up hating myself even more than I already do for this whole mess I’ve started.

“It’s where she grew up; Melody grew up in New York before she moved to Hong Kong.” He states easily. “Melody grew up in a very image-conscious setting; her parents are all about how they are perceived to their peers, friends, and public. Melody happened to meet a certain person there in New York that made her not give one damn about what people said about her, care to take a guess?”

“Theo,” I answer not at all liking this conversation.

Nichkhun nods his head as he starts the car driving off into traffic. “And as I’m sure you’re aware, Melody has absolutely no closure from that particular person. She has a bad reaction anytime he comes up or when she happens to think of him.”

“I’m aware.” I answer worriedly. “So if she’d gone back there…”

“Things have to be pretty bad here. Melody doesn’t exactly have pleasant memories of New York, at least none she’s ever conveyed to me.” Nichkhun says seriously. “So I suggest you think about whatever it is you said to her, it made her run back to something familiar, painful, and far away.”

“How do I ask for her to stay?” I question Nichkhun. “What if she doesn’t want to stay?”

Nichkhun glances at me, a frown on his face. “Melody as I’m sure you know doesn’t necessarily do what she wants, but what she thinks is best. Julia says she’ll be back, Junhyung says she promised to come back, but getting her to stay might just be up to circumstance. After all leaving had been up to that.”

I'm going to admit that this whole turn of events kind of
caught me off guard, I orginally had something different planned.
But as usual I kind of just go with the flow when I'm writing.
Anyways, I hope you guys enjoy!