- Taeyeon's POV -

I quietly stepped into the house, not wanting to wake anyone up in case they were already sleeping. My eyes widened in shock when I saw someone resting on the couch. "Mom...?" I took a few steps forward to make sure.

"Ah Taeyeon ah you're home." Mom rubbed her eyes a little as she sat up straight.

"Why did you wait for me?" I took a seat on the couch next to hers.

"Mmm..." She looked like she was at a loss for words, but I knew exactly why. She probably just didn't want to bring it up again.

"Mom..." I held her hand and I smiled, gently.

"Today... It's Jessica's birthday isn't it...?" Her eyes were shining, as the light reflected the tears in her eyes.

I found myself looking away as I bit my lips, my tears threatening to fall. "Mmm..." I nodded, barely managing to say as my voice shook.

"Taeyeon ah..." Mom's voice was shaking too. I tried to look up and try to hold the tears in my eyes. "Just cry if you want to..." I shook my head, but my tears fell all the same.

"Yawn... Mom you aren't asleep yet? Oh unnie you're he- Gosh unnie..." I kept my head low even though I heard Hayeon's voice. It wasn't long before I felt her arms wrap around me. "Unnie... What happened...?" I gently held onto her arms which were holding me.

"Hayeon ah..." I started sobbing. "It's your Jessica unnie's birthday... Why does it hurt so badly...? It hurts so much... Hayeon ah I don't what to do any more... I want to see her... I really want to see her..."

"Unnie..."

- Claire's POV -

"Krys." I was leaning against the head board of my bed as Krystal laid flat on her stomach beside me, reading a book.

"Hmm?"

"Actually, did we celebrate my birthday like this every year?"

"Huh?" Krystal finally looked up from her book and turned to look at me.

"I mean, like, do we do this every year together?"

"W-Why...?" She closed her book and sat up straight facing me, cross-legged.

"Mmm..." I looked at her while trying to figure out how to put my words. "I don't know. It's like...it feels like...how should I put it. Like...my birthday feels...more than that."

"What? Your birthday feels more than that? What are you even try'na say? Like...our plan wasn't good enough?" Krystal pouted.

"No... That wasn't what I meant. I love it with you guys are around. You guys are my family what are you even talking about. I meant...I don't know. It just feels like it's more... Wait. I really have no idea how to put it without sounding like I don't appreciate you guys, which is not true."

"Haha I was just kidding. Just say whatever you're thinking."

"We spent every single one of my birthdays like this?"

"Mmm..." I raised an eyebrow when Krystal started to think. "Most of the time."

"And when it wasn't most of the time, who did I spend it with?"

"Uh..." She looked like she was a loss for words. "Maybe...your friends?"

"Oh... You didn't know?"

Krystal shrugged as she continued looking at me. "What's with all these questions?"

"I really hate this feeling as if I had only started living my life 2 years ago. Everything before that is a blur, no wait, it's like non-existent. You guys are not hiding anything from me by any chance right?"

"Why would we silly you. But...did you remember anything new?"

"Sometimes it feels a little...empty somehow, and it feels like someone took my heart in their hand and squeezed it. It's a really bad feeling."

"That's disgusting sis."

"I know right. But alright, point is, I had a dream a few days ago. About my birthday. But I don't know if it was part of my memory or just a dream."

"What...? What was it about?"

"Mmm... It wasn't quite clear... I just remember it was a place where there was...water? Like it was really beautiful. And there were...people. People I knew, but their faces... I couldn't see them at all. It was like just a mass of people. And what else was there... Ah! Flowers. There was a bouquet of flowers. And... Hssss... And er... Oh. Someone held my hand. I couldn't see who. But I remember it made me feel like the knot in my heart was untied. I felt so...free and comfortable. Hmm... Yeah something like that."

Krystal was staring at me by this time. I snapped my finger in front of her and she jumped a little as she got out of her trance.

"What's wrong with you?" I asked.

"A-ah no. Just... You're soooo dramatic. Loving Korean drama is one thing, but acting like you're the female lead in it is like...retarded, Jessi. Oh I can't stand you."

"What? Je what? Jessi?"

"Uh... Ya. You know Jessica Alba? You loved her, and you insisted that I call you Jessica."

"What?! Gosh. That was so childish!"

"Ah haha... I know right..."

"Oh and...what did you say? Loving Korean drama? I loved Korean drama? But I hate it."

I saw the colour slowly draining out of Krystal's face as she swallowed her saliva.

"Uh... Y-yeah..."

"Krys. What's wrong with you? Is there something that I should know?"

"No... Uh sis look, I'm kinda...tired. I shall go get some sleep alright? Sleep earlier sis. Love you."

She finished her words and walked out, taking her book with her. That girl sure was weird. I squinted my eyes, as I tried to think of the dream again. Was there something that they were hiding from me...?

- Krystal's POV -

I sank into my bed with a thud and I closed my eyes, as a million thoughts raced through my mind.

"Krystal, you don't understand, and I'm not expecting you to. Plus, you don't need to do anything, literally. Don't do anything. Don't tell her anything."

"Mom I can't do that!"

"Why can't you?"

"It's unfair mom... It's unfair to sis and it's even more unfair to Taeyeon! You love Taeyeon too isn't it? Who are you trying to even fool?"

"I'm not fooling anyone. Yes, I love Taeyeon. I love seeing her and my daughter happily together. But Krystal, this isn't for me..."

"Mom... Shouldn't you let sis decide that...? I mean...it's her life and it's her memory..."

"You will never understand a mother's heart Krys... I'd honestly love to even see them getting married. But Krystal... Your sister's life is the most important thing to me. Isn't it the same to you? Don't you want her safely by your side? That one time was enough..."

"I...I know... But mom... If the same thing happened to me... I'd still really... I... I'd rather... Mom I don't want to break your heart but...I think Jessi loves her so much that she would rather risk everything, including her life, to be with Taeyeon..."

"And that's the reason why we need to keep this from her. Krystal please...just for your selfish mother who wants her daughter safe and sound... If, let's say if, they are fated to be together, your sister will remember someday and by that time we can't stop her any more, isn't it?"

"Mom Jessi's gonna hate us. I swear she's gonna hate us. And Taeyeon... I can't... We really can't do that mom..."

"I will just ask you one question. Would you rather lose your sister, and never to see her again in your life?"

No... I can't live without Jessi. Of course I want her to be alive and kicking... "No..."

"You know what to do."

"Argh!" I messed up my own hair as I covered my face with my pillow and screamed into it. Claire. Claire my . What a stupid name that doesn't even fit her. I wonder how Taeyeon was doing... She was so kind... And Jessi... Jessi loved her with her life. She'd be so heartbroken if she knew that the memory she had left behind included someone who was as important as her life, no, even more important than her life. Jessi I'm so sorry... But...maybe mom was right... I couldn't even imagine what would happen if you really left us that day. Although...Taeyeon must have felt all those pain, thinking that you were really gone...

© Sky Blue Tales ✍