[A/N] I know that if you're reading this story, it probably means that Taeyeon somehow means a lot to you, and let's not talk about what was revealed today. I've read that some TaengSic authors are leaving their stories behind, and very sadly, some of them are authors I actually like. I wouldn't say that I'm completely unaffected by the news, but let's just say that as long as Taeyeon can be happy, I'm gonna be happy for her. Afterall, fanfictions are fanfictions. They're real humans, and they live in the real life, not in our fanfictions. I love to write, and I love TaengSic, TaeNy, JungSis, and a lot of their other bonds. That, I assure you, will never change. Also, I really appreciate all of you readers. I feel that it's not nice of me to abruptly discontinue my stories, not like I even planned to. But, I'm expecting quite a few, or a lot of TaengSic fans to ditch my stories, together with their love for TaengSic. However, for those who are staying, I'm thanking you in advance. For loving Taeyeon, for believing in TaengSic's bond, and for supporting me.

Now, the story.

- Story view -

"Kim Taeyeon, hi."

Taeyeon froze, unable to even turn her head towards the source of the voice. Her heartbeat increased rapidly as she could somehow hear the footsteps approaching her. The footsteps stopped when they were just beside her on her left. Swallowing her saliva, she clenched her jaw as she turned. She blinked a few times in surprise when it wasn't the face she was expecting to see.

"K-Krystal...? Why is it you...?" She was so flustered that her thoughts directly came out of . Krystal didn't say anything. Instead, she stood where she was and gave a slight smile.

"You're disappointed, aren't you?" Taeyeon's eyes widened when that same voice now sounded on her right instead. Instinctively, her head snapped to the right. Jessica. Taeyeon looked at the girl mindlessly, with agape. "Krys, thanks for accompanying me here. I'll see you at home." Jessica didn't mind the eyes which were still glued to her, and spoke to her sister.

"Okay. I'll see you at home. Hmm, Taeyeon unnie?"

Taeyeon snapped out of her trance and turned back to look at the younger Jung, who wrapped her arms around her immediately. She wasn't quite sure of the situation, but she hugged her back all the same. "I'm glad you're finally back, Taeyeon unnie. I'll see you again, someday, okay?" Krystal said, as she pulled away from the hug, smiling. "Bye!" She then waved to the two of them before leaving them. The utterly confused Taeyeon then turned to look at Jessica once again.

Time seemed to slow down for a while, as Taeyeon processed that face, those eyes, those lips. Her eyes flickered for a second, giving herself away, showing the whole world that she was still madly, deeply in love with Jessica Jung who was right before her. She realised it and tried to mask it with her facade of indifference, but Jessica had already seen it, very clearly.

"So, you were disappointed. Weren't you? 'Why is it you?' You wanted to see me instead of little Krys, didn't you?" Jessica asked, her arms crossed over her chest, with a look of confidence on her face.

"Wipe that expression off your face, please. I don't get why you're so full of yourself. Did the breakup get you that badly?"

"Did the breakup get me badly, or you, badly? Who's the one who escaped after the breakup?"

"What? You think way too much of yourself. I didn't leave because of the breakup. Do you think that the world revolves only around you? It certainly doesn't work that way, Claire." Jessica hissed when she heard that name again.

"Ouch Taeyeon. Ouch. Stop it already." The younger girl didn't sound as hurt as her words did, somehow.

"Look, Claire. If you think that you can still salvage anything between us after these two months, I'm telling you, give up. We're over, Claire. How many times do you need me to say that before you get it etched in your mind?"

"Are you really, really, really going to be like this, Taeyeon? Are you stupid or what?" Taeyeon furrowed her eyesbrows at being called 'stupid'. What did she do to be called stupid all of a sudden?

"I'm sorry that the breakup has messed up your mind or something. But I think we're clear on this. We're over, Claire. We're over. I'll get going. I hope to not see you ever again. Stop getting on my nerves." Taeyeon forced herself to let those cruel words flow out of once more, before paining herself to turn away from Jessica.

"Kim Taeyeon. Stop right there." The older girl didn't mean to listen to her, but her body just did, as she stood where she was again. "Yes. It's over between Claire, and you. But..." Jessica took slow steps as she walked to Taeyeon's front and turned to face the girl, who refused to look back at her. "I'm afraid it's not over between you and a certain Jessica Jung. And you really, really ought to stop saying such hurtful things to someone you haven't been loving for two years."

Taeyeon's eyes widened as she stared at Jessica, but in a few seconds, her gaze turned cold. "Claire. It's not gonna change anything, whether you're Jessica or Claire. Do you think that I'll be fooled that you're Jessica? My Jessica's gone. And you'll never be Jessica." Whatever Taeyeon said was already getting incoherent. She was so flustered that she was going crazy.

"Kim Taeyeon. Are you being a retard or what? Those words can push Claire away, but not me. Do you think I'm an idiot to not be able to tell what's going in your mind just by looking at your eyes? Stop your nonsense right now. I'll never be Jessica? How about I tell you all the bits and pieces that happened in our bedroom where there were only the two of us? All our bedroom adventures? Should I? So during the first Christmas after our graduation, you lied to me that you had to help your dad with some work and forced me to go home instead. And when I opened my door, you basically just cra-"

"Stop it."

"Okay. So you believe me now?"

"It doesn't matter whether I do, or not."

"I sure expected this. Come with me." Jessica grabbed Taeyeon's arm and was about to drag her away when Taeyeon yanked her hand off fiercely.

"I'm not going anywhere with you."

"Kim Taeyeon." Jessica's hand tightened her hold around Taeyeon's arm yet again, but this time, anger was blinking dangerously in Jessica's eyes. "If you don't want me to ing drag you to the restroom right now and the hell out of you, you follow me when I ask you to. You know I can, and you know that I don't give a damn."

" me? In the airport? Really?" Taeyeon didn't back down this time, as she glared back at Jessica.

"You don't believe me? Try me?" The two girls were now having a battle with their glares. Taeyeon knew that Jessica meant every word. She was actually fearful right at this moment, and she was trying her very best to mask it. "Do you really not believe that I'll do it?" Jessica pressed. Before Taeyeon could think of something to retort her with, Jessica was already dragging her off somewhere.

"Je...Jessica!" Fear was now shown in Taeyeon's eyes. "L-Let me go!" Ignoring the eyes from some onlookers, Jessica continued dragging her until they reached the nearest accessible restroom, where she pushed her in relentlessly before locking the door behind her.

"You really don't believe me...? Jessica Jung's capable of doing anything, Kim Taeyeon. This is nothing." Jessica shoved Taeyeon to the wall and grabbed her hands forcefully before pinning them on the sides of her head.

"Jessica! Are you out of your mind?!"

"I'm not. You are."

"Let me go. Let me go!" Taeyeon struggled but Jessica kept her firmly in place, making her resistance futile. "Do you not hear me Jung Sooyeon? I said le-"

"I miss you, Kim Taeyeon." That one sentence shut Taeyeon up, and immediately brought tears to her eyes, especially when Jessica's eyes were b with tears when she said that. "I...I missed you so badly..." Jessica could no longer hold back the pent-up emotions that she had accumulated ever since Krystal had told her the truth. Taeyeon tore her eyes off the girl in front of her, as her own tears threatened to fall. "Taeyeon... How long more do you need me to wait for you...?"

"D-Don't..." Taeyeon croaked. "Don't wait for me... Sica ya..." She whimpered as she pained herself to say those words to Jessica. "Let me go." The words came out as a plead, and Jessica released her hands as their arms fell to their sides.

"This isn't it... This isn't it Taeyeon ah." Jessica said weakly, hanging her head, letting the tears fall.

"I can't do this... Sica ya... I can't... Don't hold onto me any more... It's time you let me go... Let...us go..."

A stream of tears flowed down Jessica's cheek, and she gently wiped them off with her hand, before looking back up at Taeyeon. "Why do you have to leave me...? I know you're scared. I know you're traumatised. But we should face this together. It doesn't matter. I'm not scared."

"But I am! Sica you're not, but I am... Jess I'm scared out of my wits..."

Jessica found herself unable to speak a word, as she continued looking at Taeyeon.

"I'm sorry..." Taeyeon's voice was soft, almost like a whisper, and she casted one more look at Jessica, before she turned to go.

"Taeyeon." Jessica's tone was helpless, and broken. "Take this. Take this and go." The younger girl held out a small blue notebook, but she wasn't looking at her. Clenching her jaw, Taeyeon took the notebook, before turning to go again. This time, she stopped right outside the door.

"Sica ya." She had the girl looking up at her back. "I..." It was difficult for Taeyeon to speak, when she felt so choked. She swallowed hard at her saliva, before attempting to finish her sentence. "I love you."

Jessica clenched her fist, her eyes teary, as she watched Taeyeon disappearing out of view. She needed a better, and stronger plan.

- Taeyeon's POV -

"You really don't believe me...? Jessica Jung's capable of doing anything, Kim Taeyeon. This is nothing." She pinned me against the wall when she threatened. What the heck?!

"Jessica! Are you out of your mind?!" Flustered, my body, or throat actually, acted on its own and yelled at her.

"I'm not. You are." Now, what kind of nonsense is she saying now?!

"Let me go. Let me go!" I tried my best to struggle out of her grip but her hold was tight and I found my efforts completely useless. Actually, I wasn't that sure if I wanted to let go. I missed her so much. In fact, I was doing my best to keep my eyes off those lips. me? Really? It wouldn't be called if that was exactly what I wanted to do to her too, right? No Kim Taeyeon what are you even thinking. "Do you not hear me Jung Sooyeon? I said le-"

"I miss you, Kim Taeyeon."

I swallowed the rest of the words down as her words sank in. I lost it. All that control, all that effort to mask my feelings, all those lies that I didn't want Jessica any more. My tears found their way to my eyes and all I could do was to stare into her eyes. Those familiar eyes. I miss you too... I miss you too Jung Sooyeon...

- Story view -

Taeyeon was in her office, two weeks after her return. She hadn't received any calls or messages from Jessica, and to be honest, she was worried sick. She knew that she had told the girl to let her go, but she had expected to at least get some calls or messages that she could reject somehow. She looked like she was deep in thoughts with work matters, but the truth was, she was only staring blankly at the wallpaper on her computer, which happened to be a photo of her and Jessica on their eighth anniversary.

"Are you okay...?" Taeyeon mindlessly muttered to the Jessica on her screen. Little did she know that at that instant, Jessica had already stepped foot into the same building that she was in.

"Hi can I help... M-Miss... Miss Jung?!" The receptionist's eyes widened as she recognised the familiar face.

"Hey Hyeri. What's with the 'Miss Jung' again? But it's been a long while, isn't it?" Jessica smiled slightly, the gentleness obvious in her eyes. "Taeyeon. She's in, right?"

"Yes she is! I-I'll give Miss Kim a call!"

"Ah no. You don't have to. She doesn't have any appointment today, does she?"

"Ah, let me check... No. She doesn't have any appointments scheduled. You can go on up." The receptionist lightly touched Jessica's hand which was on the counter, and smiled to this person in front of her whom she could consider as her old friend.

"Okay, thank you. I'm so glad to see you again, Hyeri. We should go and have coffee again someday. I'm sure you have so many interesting things to tell me."

"I do. Of course I do. We should go someday!"

"I'll ring you up."

"Okay Miss-"

"What?" Jessica gave her a look, prompting her to call her by the right name.

"Okay, Jessica." Hyeri grinned, while Jessica returned the smile before she proceeded to go to Taeyeon's office.

Taeyeon was emotionlessly spinning her pen while staring into space when someone knocked on her door. Surprised, she quickly sat up straight before she muttered a "come in!". When she registered Jessica's face, she couldn't help but to stare at her with agape. Just moments ago, she was all worried about the girl, and yet, she knew that she should let her go when she had already made the decision to do that. Jessica closed the door behind her and took slow steps towards Taeyeon, who couldn't keep her eyes off her because of the shock. She had expected Jessica to contact her, but not to turn up at her office out of the blue.

Jessica stopped when the only distance between them was the width of the desk. The girl's presence was suffocating and for once, Taeyeon was glad that there was at least a desk separating the two of them.

"Get up." Taeyeon found herself swallowing her saliva when Jessica commanded. Something told her that Jessica was determined to get something done today, and the way she knew her, she wouldn't give up until she gets what she wants.

"What do you want?" Taeyeon replied, as she remained in a seat.

"Kim Taeyeon. I'm not interested in exchanging drama lines with you. We've been together for ten years. I know you inside out, and you know me inside out. You don't have to 'what do you want' me with that expression. You know what I want, and you know that no matter what nonsense you hurl at my face, I won't believe any of them. I could have believed you, but that's only if I haven't been loving you for the past decade and more. But you know what? Too bad. Because I have been loving you, and I'm not actually intending to stop. Now, get up. Don't make me repeat myself."

"Jessica, cut it out. This is my office. Don't even try anything funny. They can see everything."

"Oh, they do?" With that, Jessica took quick steps to lower the blinds before proceeding to the door and turning the lock, while Taeyeon looked on in silent fear. "Now, they can't. So I can try anything I want to, right?" Taeyeon could only blink several times as Jessica moved towards her and grabbed her by her collar, dragging her a little as she pushed her against the wall.

"J-Jessica cut it out!" Taeyeon tugged at Jessica's arms, hoping to free herself from the hold, but to no avail. Jessica was enraged, and Taeyeon knew it very well.

"You think you can hold me back. Try me. Resist." With quick actions, Jessica's hands moved from pinning Taeyeon's arms, to cupping her neck, as she dangerously shrunk the gap between the two of them, until there was only the distance of probably strand of hair. Taeyeon didn't even notice that she was holding her breath, as she looked in Jessica's eyes, her eyes shook, as if letting out slight tremors. It was taking her a lot of effort to resist kissing those lips, and she was biting so hard on her teeth. "You're actually resisting? Two years, and suddenly you can do something that you can never do, huh? Fine. Push me away. Try." Without more words, Taeyeon felt Jessica's warm lips and her whole body stiffened. Even so, she wouldn't give up. However, when Jessica nibbled on her lower lip, her resistance caved in. She took Jessica's upper lip instead, and her hands automatically wrapped themselves around the younger girl's waist. Before she could deepen the kiss, Jessica pulled away, her gaze strong, and Taeyeon knew that she had lost this battle.

"I..." She tried to find an explanation, but the words were caught in .

"You can never push me away, can you? Or do you want to tell me that it's all only because of lust? Or, what other nonsense do you have to tell me? You can't tell me that you don't love me any more, because you do. You know you do." Jessica's tone was firm. But no one knew how fragile the girl was, at that moment. She had told herself that it would be her final attempt to get Taeyeon back, and that she would give up, if Taeyeon was so bent on giving up on them. "Push me away. Right now. If you really want to push me away, do it. Now." What Taeyeon said next, broke Jessica into pieces. A million pieces.

"Leave while I'm still being nice."

"I'm not leaving. I told you, push me away. I'm not gonna leave, unless you push me away. You hear me? Push me away if you want me to leave."

"Leave, Jessica. I don't want to do this with you. It's pointless. Just...leave."

"You don't get it... Do you...? Have you ever thought about how I would be feeling? What if the roles were reversed? You know, if you want me to be safe but to live without you, I'd rather die. There's n-"

"Jessica." Taeyeon couldn't look at Jessica in the eyes any more. "Leave."

"You don't believe whatever I said, right? You think I'm just like them, telling you all sorts of things just to make you come back to your senses. You think I don't mean it." There was something dangerous about the way Jessica spoke at that moment and Taeyeon found herself looking at the girl yet again. "Fine." With that, Jessica left her spot and walked towards her couch where her bag was, and reached into the bag. Taeyeon stretched her neck a little and squinted, trying to figure out what Jessica meant. "I'll prove it to you." Taeyeon's eyes widened when Jessica's back straightened as she turned to look at her. It wasn't because of how stiff Jessica's body was. Neither was it because of the heartbreaking and tearful glare that Jessica was giving Taeyeon.

It was because of the small knife in her hand. And Taeyeon couldn't be mistaken about the red line, that was darkening as each millisecond passed, on the blade, which was right on Jessica's wrist.

[A/N] I'm still hoping that you read my story with a clear mind, and I'm waiting for your comments as usual :) I know some of your hearts are wounded, or severely wounded now, and my chapter isn't exactly helping. If this helps, then I'm reminding you yet again, to trust me. I really shouldn't be telling you how this story will end up. But if it soothes your heart just for a second, I'm asking you again to trust me, and I hope that you get what I'm trying to indirectly tell you.

Taeyeon is my idol, my role model. The only thing I can even do for her now, is to tell you to love her. Because she needs the fans' support more than anything right now. She cherishes her fans so much, you know it. Let's hold hands (virtually) and love her together till the end, can we? :)

​© Sky Blue Tales ✍