Presents (Part 2)

The Cute Panda Boy

"Have all of you bought presents for him?"

"Yeah."

"Let's go home and wrap the presents."

All of them ran back to their dorm. As soon as they reach the dorm, they took out the presents, wrapping paper and colourful sharpie pen. They write happy birthday on the wrapping paper with different writing. As they finished, they put the presents in a secret place in the girls dorm. The boys went back to their dorm while CL send a message to Kris about the party.

*In the boys dorm*

The boys came in the and saw Kris in the dining room.

"Where's Tao?"

"He sleep back as soon as he finished showering."

It was a silence because they don't want Tao to woke up. Then, Kris broke the silence.

"Can both of you take care of him. I want to buy him present for tomorrow."

"OK."

He put on his jacket and shoe and ran to the mall as fast as lightning. As soon as he reached there, he went to a pet shop and bought a white cute kitten. It's a female.

He can't run anymore since the kitten is inside his jacket. He went to the girls dorm and knock on it. 

Dara open the door and let him enter.

"I already bought Tao a present."

"A kitten?"

"Yeah, can you help me feed her a bit of milk tonight until tomorrow and put her in inside a medium size box."

"OK."

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Comments

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6November1990 #1
Chapter 23: Yay!!! So ur P6 too. Finally, someone who understands how I feel...
rainydots #2
OMG TAO AND 2NE1! Looks interesting!
Wushupandabear #3
Chapter 2: Ahhhh, you put B.A.P and EXO together. I'm dead.
Totomatoes #4
Chapter 12: Okay since it's just an opinion, please don't hate me.

Your story is kind of plain. I mean, sure there were grammar mistakes but I could care less about that. I'm not a grammar nazi. Anyway, (IN MY OPINION PLEASE DON'T KILL ME) when I read, I didn't see the true flow of the story in my head. It sounded and seemed monotonous. I imagined them doing and talking with poker faces. The events and the flow are too fast, you weren't able to show the development of the characters' feelings and thoughts. I'm not being mean, I just want to help. I know I'm not even a writer, but I like reading :) And I'm happy to read other people's stories.

I hoped I helped, I'm not sure if you're my dongsaeng or hyung. But really, I know my opinion hurt you, even if I tried not to, but my intention was to help. (I'm really worried if you're angry or upset about this)

Please don't take it too hard. Uhm... do your best in your stories :) Don't give up and take care of yourself!! (It's off topic and I sound like a mom)

So uhm... yeah. My opinion... uhh… yeah. *awkward cough*
MaeYoung04
#5
Chapter 10: puhlease upeudateu unnie~!
bobbymbap
#6
Chapter 10: miss 2nexo im your unnie and i command u to update more xie cie kamsahanmida
chunjoe1004 #7
nice story!
bobbymbap
#8
Chapter 8: update more
MaeYoung04
#9
Chapter 7: too many updates in one day dude~