Changmin opens his eyes and sees a worried junsu sits next to the bed, palming his forehead.

      “When did the last time you eat?” Junsu’s worried face is close to him.

Changmin moves his head slowly. He’s still dizzy and feels like floating.

      “Tonight’s dinner? You didn’t eat?” Junsu bites his lips.

Changmin blinks again. He misses seeing his Junsu so much.

      “Min!”

Changmin shakes his head slowly.

      “Why didn’t you eat?” Junsu is angry.

      “I returned all of the coupons to Yunho.”

      “What??” junsu gapes. “Why did you do that?”

Changmin closes his eyes, doesn’t want to answer.

      “What do you have left in the kitchen?”

      “Nothing.” Changmin murmurs.

Junsu stands fast.

      “I’ll buy something in the nearest convenience store.”

      “No, please.” Changmin forces himself to sit despite the headache. “You’ll not come back.”

      “Silly. Stay there. I won’t be long.” Junsu pushes Changmin shoulder to lay and exits the bedroom. Changmin tries to grab Junsu’s hand but the man has fled the room and closed the door. Changmin wants to scream calling Junsu back but his voice mocks him.

Junsu curses low over and over. What the hell has Changmin done? What happened? Why changmin returned all the coupons? What has he missed these ten days? He rides in mad speed and rides back in sweat. He runs climbing the stairs up and ignores the cursing and swearing people throw at him for making such unaccepted noise in the ungodly hour of the day.

      “What’s wrong with the tap?” He yells from kitchen. “The stove doesn’t work either.”

      “Water problem in the first floor. No water since Wednesday.” Changmin responds weakly.

      “The stove?”

      “Runs out of gas.”

Junsu curses high. He runs out again and comes back thirty minutes later with a bowl of hot instant soup.

      “Eat it up. I’ll get some water.”

Yoochun, Changmin speaks to himself, if you see what I see now. If you feel what I feel. If you have a human heart like I do, you will not accuse Junsu of being a murderer. Screw your facts, screw the social department I don’t give a dime about it all. Junsu is Junsu. My Junsu. Thank you for making me realize I love Junsu like my aunt loves her boyfriends. No! Not that dirty stupid excuse of love. It’s different. I love Junsu. I love everything he does. You make me see why I hate seeing people coming close to Junsu. Why I couldn’t sleep these long nights when I didn’t see him or hear him. You want prove, detective? You’ll get it.

      “Eat up.” Junsu sharpens his tired baggy eyes.

      “You are not eating.”

      “I know when I must eat.” Junsu crosses his arms, scolding the taller boy. “Unlike someone who said he can ace stupid quizzes and exams but forgets to eat.”

      “I didn’t say I could ace them.” Changmin protests, scooping the soup again.

      “Must be someone else then.”

Changmin swallows the soup.

      “You don’t have to apologize.” Junsu sighs heavily. “You have the right to know about Junho.”

      “You asked me to eat this up.”

      “Okay.”

Changmin smiles. Junsu never disappoints him.

      “Yoochun told me about your twin brother.” Changmin starts as he scoops the soup and fills his mouth. “he told me about your parents too.”

      “What happened to eating?”

      “Have to say it all before you leave again.” Changmin swallows hard. “That nosy detective dug up about you and told me what he found.”

      “He has my permission to do so.” Junsu leans on the chair’s board. “He had told me about the background check when I agreed to.. I mean when you wanted to stay with me. Basic procedures.”

      “You never told me.” Changmin sends a half glare.

      “You never asked.” Junsu simply states. “Though I have to admit I don’t really welcome the questions related to my family.”

      “I’m sorry.” Changmin mumbles.

      “Told ya no need to say sorry. Your ears aren’t on holiday again, are they?”

      “Why did you say you.. killed your brother?” Changmin asks in difficulty.

      “Because I did.” Junsu looks away. “Denying does me no good.”

      “I don’t believe it.” Changmin bites his spoon. “You are not a murderer.”

Junsu doesn’t reply.

      “I wanted to come to your store badly, asking you to come home but I chickened out every time I was about to go there.” Changmin confesses. “I went to the road in front of your store once. You were not there. The security told me to leave and I didn’t go there anymore.”

      “You could always come, Min. Everyone there knows you are my brother.”

      “I’m not your brother, Junsu.” Changmin says with renewed full awareness of every implied meaning carried by his sentence. “And I don’t want to be either.”

      “hmmff.. Afraid I’d kill you too?”

      “I’m taller, you know!”

      “I’m older.”

      “Age is just a series of number and you are thinner than a piece of paper.”

      “Maybe I should go back to store.” Junsu makes a move of standing up from the chair.

      “I’m just joking.” Changmin has jumped from the bed catching Junsu’s hand. The bowl nearly spills its content on to the mattress and bed sheet from Changmin’s fast reaction. “Don’t sleep there anymore.”

Junsu hmpfs and turns his head.

      “Your soup, hero.”

      “Sleep here.”

      “Soup first.” Junsu ruffles the hair. He has to reach higher now since Changmin is taller than him. “How did you grow tall this fast?”

Changmin grins.

After Junsu carries the empty bowl and glass to kitchen, Changmin insists on sleeping with Junsu. He holds Junsu’s hand tight pulling the thin figure to sleep in his room.

      “Your clothes are mostly gone. Your toothbrush, soap, shampoo and the others too.”

      “Did you raid my room when I wasn’t home?” Junsu tsks.

      “I slept in your room waiting for you, didn’t I?”

      “Raiding the other’s room is against the law.”

      “Not coming home for more than a week is against the universe’s law.”

      “School doesn’t teach you that, does it?”

Changmin chuckles. Of course not. Love teaches him that.

      “Sorry I didn’t mean to let things go this far, Junsu.” Changmin sighs. Lying on the bed next to this boney man feels so warm and filling. “I was shocked when you admitted it. I was lost of what to say to you because I hoped, like really hoped strongly, you would say something else.”

Junsu is trying to sleep. He has a day off tomorrow. Not tomorrow. Today. He already planned to spend time writing in the basement, free from the world’s business but Changmin has kicked his plan to Mars.

      “You didn’t help.” The taller one pouts. “You barely stayed home. And if you did, you locked your door all the time.” Changmin half rolls. “Okay, I need time too to sort some useless things out myself but the thing is, you cannot just runaway everytime I made you upset, Junsu. It’s your flat. I’m just a stranded kid you picked home.”

      “Hmmm..”

      “When I decided to talk to you and straightened things out between us, you never came home.”

      “Hmm..”

      “I’m talking here, man!”

Junsu rolls away and makes snoring noise.

      “Junsu!!” Changmin kicks Junsu’s leg.

Junsu holds his chuckle.

      “I returned all the coupons because I don’t want Yunho freaking out when he hears about your.. case.”

      “What’s the connection between your coupons and me?”

Changmin widens his eyes.

      “The social department could move me out from your flat when they hear the stupid rumor about you killing your twin brother which is not true.”

      “It’s true.”

      “It’s not.”

      “I was there doing it.”

      “I decided it’s not true.”

Since when this Changmin becomes so confident? Junsu takes mental note.

      “So, I went to see Yunho and returned all the coupons. I told them I’ll pay the school fee on my own till graduation too. They don’t have to waste money on me.”

Junsu rolls back fast.

      “Do you know what you did?” He demands with narrowed eyes.

      “I had paid this month’s fee.”

      “You didn’t have that much money!”

      “You don’t know. You didn’t go home for ten days.”

      “Will you be able to pay for next month’s fee? You said you quit wo-

      “Some people said my drawings are good. I got order and it pays better than delivering papers and milk.”

      “Rascal! You can’t just return your coupons to Yunho. You are still under the social department’s responsibility!”

      “Not anymore soon. I’ll turn nineteen in a few weeks and I’ll graduate in the next three months. Or less. They couldn’t tell or force rules on me anymore after I graduate.” Changmin says with firm note. “And I don’t want them moving me out from your flat.”

      “How did you learn all of that?”

      “I read the clauses you didn’t read on the approval letter.” Changmin answers smugly.

      “Where did you read it? It’s not for public.”

      “Well, if you know how to prank Yunho…

      “You read it in his office?” Junsu’s widened eyes round in disbelief.

      “I kept him busy and left me in his office for a long time.”

Junsu smacks changmin.

      “Ouch!”

      “Don’t prank Yunho. He has done so much for you!”

Not as much as what you do for me, Junsu. You don’t know how precious you are for me. I used to think that being accepted and being acknowledged by certain people mean the better world for me. You came and changed my shallow perception. It’s okay not to be accepted or acknowledged by people who might be important or have influences in society. It’s okay to be honest with what you want because now I know. For me, you are what matters. Coupons? School’s support? Nothing. You make school becomes bearable. You make me gaining more friends beside Jonghyun and Jinwoon. You make the teachers see and smile at me. You make today’s me. I find courage to say what I really want and I don’t have to use fist anymore to be heard. It’s you Junsu. It’s all you.

      “I’ll call school that you are still unwell.”

Changmin nods. His eyes planted on Junsu from the second one he opens his eyes after long comforting sleep.

      “You’ll come home, won’t you?” Changmin pleads with begging eyes.

      “I have a day off today.” Junsu smiles. “Cleaning up sounds a good idea. No, mister. You stay there. You have carried water from Mr. Fujitsu’s quarter to fill our bathroom’s tube. Three big pails all by yourself. Why didn’t you wake me up? Don’t you dare to move an inch or I’ll strap you.”

      “Just three floors.” Changmin complains. He wants to see Junsu all the time. “People in the fifth floor also take water and fill their bathroom’s tube from Mr. Fujitsu’s quarter.”

      “Do I look like a joke to you, huh?”

No. You look perfect. Too skinny but still perfect. You should sleep more. The dark circles around your eyes make you look like a sweet panda wannabe.

      “I didn’t bring more money.” Junsu informs as he starts tidying things up. “We need to refill the kitchen’s shelves with food. I’ll buy some breakfast after this.”

Changmin has held Junsu’s arm in two second.

      “I’ll go with you.”

      “You don’t go to school because you are not fit and now you want to shop?”

      “Going with you, period.”

      “I said don’t move from the couch!!! And what is this? Let go of me!”

Changmin fakes a cough. Junsu glares at him but let Changmin hold his arm. He grunts as he continues tidying their small flat up. Changmin cheers happily inside. The arm he is holding is thin. One hand is more than enough to hold.

      “Mopping now. Sit still.” Junsu points at the couch. “We’ll do the bedrooms later after the water is already fixed.”

He climbs down with a pail to get water and returns to mop the floor of their small living room, kitchen and bathroom’s floor.

The clauses stated that the assigned temporary guardian and the child under the care are not to have any relationship that may lead to severe child abuse or child’s enslavement. Changmin loves Junsu. It’s not technically considered as relationship since Junsu is taking his role as a loving brother. As per right now, it’s not Changmin abuse. It’s more to Junsu abuse. Look at what that thin man do. He cleans the floor and sets the couch to make Changmin relax and gets better. He doesn’t have fever but he lets Junsu palm his forehead several times because he likes it. He must be smiling wide when Junsu checks his temperature because Junsu flicks him afterward.

      “I’ll wash the mopping stick downstairs.”

Changmin nods merrily. He lies on the couch set by Junsu. A pillow is placed on the right end of the couch for him. Junsu exits the flat with the mopping stick and a pail. Changmin yawns as he waits. Junsu has a day off and he doesn’t go to school. Great, changmin smiles. All the great things come to those who wait. How true the proverb is. He’s been waiting for ten days, sad, desperate, miserable, awful. It’s all worth it. He yawns again in content. His eyelids slowly flutter close. it’s so warm and beyond comfortable. Just the thought of knowing Junsu is home makes him feel at ease in peace. He dozes off after a while, curling up sleeping on the couch. He hears light sound from far distance. Sounds of opened door and someone walks in. Changmin mumbles low, too lazy to open his eyes when a blanket is draped on him. He stays asleep and totally shutting down the world behind him.

Junsu watches the sleeping Changmin in awe.

Last night was long and tiring for both of them. Changmin drained both of their emotions by ranting on and on about the days Junsu wasn’t home. Junsu turned his back against the taller boy because he couldn’t hold his fast beating heart when Changmin’s eyes looking at him with that softened pleading gazes. He promises not to be too close to this sleeping curled up boy. It’s hard to do when those eyes are looking at you, round and begging. Changmin said several times that Junsu is not a murderer. His heart flew to the sky, soaring higher and roaring wild when he heard Changmin stated it firmly. Junsu doesn’t know how changmin is so convinced that Junsu didn’t kill Junho. It doesn’t matter anymore. It still matters somehow but Changmin’s repetitive utterance than Junsu is not a murderer soothing Junsu’s painful memory. He had an undisturbed sleep last night. Long and free from nightmare. Changmin’s sentence resounded in his sleep. You are not a murderer, Junsu.

What did this kid do again? Returning the coupons? Paying his school fee?

He’s grown up to a proud young man with a pride. And he sleeps cutely like always. Junsu leans down slowly and places a very light soft kiss on Changmin’s hair. Thank you, Changmin. You untied the suffocating strong knots inside me.

Changmin hardly able resisting pulling Junsu in and hug him tight but he’s too sleepy to do so. He feels the very light soft kiss on his hair. All the other hair on his body stands in protest demanding the same treatment. He laughs in his sleep and Junsu catches the smile on Changmin’s face. He takes a pillow from his bedroom and sleep on the floor close to Changmin. Breakfast can wait after the taller one wakes up from his sleep.

      “Su.. Junsu.. Wake up.”

Junsu squirms lightly and goes on sleeping.

      “Aish you skinny bones.” The tall student stomps his feet and goes to kitchen with a pout. “I’ve prepared bread and jam and you choose to sleep.” He complains. He gets a boiling pan and turns on the stove. “You have to eat all of this.”

The water has been fixed and can function well as usual. Their neighbor knocked on their door to inform that. It awoke Changmin from his sleep. He thanked the kind neighbor (not all of them are as caring as that one) and saw the shopping carton on kitchen’s table. He saw a brown wrapping too. Not on kitchen’s table. It’s on the living room table. The gas tube had been replaced with new one too. Junsu must have done shopping and replacing the gas when Changmin was asleep.

      “Junsu..” Changmin shakes the skinny man after the ramen is cooked well. “Junsuuuuuuu….”

Junsu moves aside, refusing to wake up.

      “Suuu..” Changmin pulls Junsu’s foot and the man is dragged from the pillow.

      “Huh.. What?”

Changmin freezes. He runs to bathroom to get any available towel and runs back to half awake Junsu. He stuffs the towel on Junsu’s face harshly.

      “I’ll get ice cubes. Don’t stand up.”

      “Hhpptthhhfff” Junsu flails on the floor.

      “Don’t sit or stand up!! Wait till I’m back with ice cube!” The stern voice is imperative.

      “Gosh.. Min. What is.. hhffttt..”

      “Your nose bleeds!!” Changmin never feels this strong urge to crush something like this. “You told me to stay still and rest but you didn’t do fair on yourself!!”

Junsu stops flailing. The towel forced on his face is a big one.

      “I’ll get ice cubes.” Changmin hastily runs out of the flat. Junsu hear click sound when the tall student closes the door. Huh? Is he locked inside his flat again? He rubs his nose and sees some drops of blood. He pinches his nose and feels no more blood coming out. Ah, just a light one. It’s already stopped. Junsu sits up slowly with head lifted up in case the blood decides to play hide and seek. He leans on the couch feet as he places his head on its lap. He presses his nose again lightly. No more blood. Changmin is just being too overboard for a light nosebleed. This is nothing compared to what he had during the kids’ event. He blinks his eyes, smelling something. Sniff sniff.. huh? Ramen? Changmin has cooked?

The door thrown open letting in a panting Changmin. He runs to Junsu after closing the door.

      “Put this on your nose.”

      “It’s cold.” Junsu cringes.

      “It’s ices! Of course it’s cold!!” Changmin glares. “Don’t try removing the ice from your nose till the bleeding stops.”

      “Already stopped after you left!”

      “I said press this on your nose!!!!”

Junsu chuckles. His pale complexion is colored with sheer color of laughing. Changmin glares more but Junsu finds him very cute with the round big glare.

      “You are sweating!” Junsu presses the ice on his nose doing Changmin’s order.

      “Bleh! I’ll get the bread and ramen.” Changmin is still panting slightly, better than before.

Junsu watches the tall student walking to and from kitchen carrying one big bowl of ramen, four loaves of jammed bread and two glasses of water. Changmin’s long legs move swiftly and fast. This boy really grows up with a magic wand.

      “I haven’t washed my face.” Junsu reasons when Changmin forces him to chew the bread.

      “Considered the ice as washing.” Changmin glares again. “Hurry up chewing!”

Junsu points at the icepack he holds on his nose.

      “No!” Changmin denies.

      “I’ll get nosebleed again if you force the cold ice on my nose more than five minutes.”

The glare intensifies but the lips pout.

      “Alright.” Changmin grunts.

      “And that’s my pillow you kicked to the corner.” Junsu wants to laugh.

      “Aarrghh…” The tall boy gets the kicked pillow and throws it to Junsu’s room. “Happy now? Eat!”

The thin man nods, chuckling. He chews the bread dutifully obeying Changmin.

      “Can’t you treat yourself better, Junsu?” Changmin scolds amidst their brunch. It’s almost noon.

      “Just a light nosebleed. Nothing to fuss about.”

Changmin wants to slap the thin man with the plate hard. Nothing to fuss? How about my shocked heart refusing to work seeing blood on your nose?

      “It’s bad, you know. Red liquid on white ghost-

      “I thought we are eating.”

Changmin says a word no more. The ramen is the next treat after the bread has disappeared from the plate. Changmin sharpens his eyes watching in protest as he examines how little Junsu eats.

      “Congratulation for winning second place.” Junsu smiles warmly. “I’m sorry I didn’t come to school last meeting. I was caught up at the other branch of Kim’s store.” He explains. “When I finally got to school, it’s already closed. Ms. Trang told me in brief about your winning. She didn’t say much about your score.”

Junsu came! Changmin’s heart swells with happiness. Junsu knew he won second place!!

      “Jonghyun wanted to meet you badly.” He obliviously pouts.

      “Hm? Why?”

      “Takes a liking on you.”

      “Haha.. Thanks. He’s a really good friend of you.”

      “Yeah.” Changmin turns sour. He glances at the brown wrapping on the table not far from them. “What is that?”

      “Hm? Junsu follows changmin’s pointing finger. “Oh. That’s your gift.”

      “My gift?” Changmin’s eyes get round. “My gift?” He repeats.

Junsu nods, chewing the ramen.

      “Open it.”

The stretched hand has torn the wrapping before Junsu says the words. Changmin is too eager to know what it is inside the brown wrapping.

      “Book!” He cheers, waving the thick book in his hand. He flips through the pages. It’s empty. All of the sheets inside the blue cover are empty.

      “You could draw or sketch there.” Junsu drinks his water. “I found those unused fine papers in the storage room. I asked jaejoong and he said it’s old stock. Like ten years ago. It’s too good to be wasted away so I cut them half and bound them into book. What do you think?”

It explains its unusual width and length for a note book and its empty pages. The handmade sketch book is wider and longer than Changmin’s note books. Perfect for sketching. Not too big and not too small. It’s thick too. Thicker than old Webster English dictionary in the school’s library.

      “Awesome.” Changmin beams. “You bound them yourself?”

      “Sorry about that. I taped it overnight after cutting it in halves. We can fix it later if one of the pages falls out.”

      “Thank you, Junsu.” Changmin jumps and hugs the skinny man. “Thank you.”

Junsu smiles. He unwinds Changmin’s arms on him softly.

      “Now, did I hear it right about someone acing the quizzes and exams?”

      “You heard it wrong.” Changmin hugs again. “But I will try.” He hugs tighter ignoring the stiff respond he gets from Junsu.