dear posh_spice25, happy birthday. wish you all the best and joy. have a blast birthday celebration ^^.

do I get some slices of cake? *drool*

Dave oppa, have a safe flight and great journey to S'pore. Lina, fighting!

      “Cameborie.” Yoochun the cold taste of fresh juiced mango smoothie on his lips. “No wonder we find nothing in Fortbax.”

      “We don’t need it anymore, Chun.” Yunho tsks Yoochun’s messy way of eating. “Junsu has proven to be good and reliable temporary guardian for Changmin. All reports stated Changmin doesn’t create troubles anymore. He even takes a part time job.”

      “You are not itchy to know about Junsu?”

      “Not really. I have many other cases to handle beside pressing my nose on someone’s background, especially Junsu’s. He has clean well managed studying record and he works dilligently. A great example for kids like Changmin.”

      “What if I tell you Junsu was raised by his grandparents because his parents didn’t want to see him?”

      “Uh uh? His parents must be selfish or-

      “Junsu had twin.”

      “Really?” Yunho leans forward. “Wait.. had? Not has?”

Yoochun smirks teasingly.

      “You said you’re not interested.”

Yunho leans back and curls his lips. He should have known better not to feed this detective with his usual unguarded responds.

      “There’s a reason why your grease forehead was not stamped by iron clad, paw.”

Yoochun gives out his typical chuckle. His eyes flicker with sheer excitement Yunho always sees when the detective is taken into something.

      “Kim Junho and Kim Junsu. Maternal twin. Not identical. Born to Kim Dongwan and Song Yoo Ra. Both divorced when Junsu was in junior high.”

      “Divorced?” Yunho is puzzled. “Infidelity? Debt?”

Yoochun shakes his head.

      “Broken heart.”

      “Broken heart??”

      “Kim Junho’s death affected the couple so much. Two years after struggling with the aftermath, they agreed to divorce. Song Yoo ra went abroad and Kim Dongwan moved to Alistair. No one cared to take Junsu with them after the divorce. The grandparents had been taking care of junsu even before the couple separated.”

      “Death?? How? Why?”

      “Still pulling some strings for better picture. People are not as attentive in the big cities as people in rural ones. Cameborie is big city. My contact there found about the divorce and kim Junho’s death easily since it’s recorded and stored in civil database but the story behind it remains hidden. Typical metropolis broken family story.”

      “Junsu is an abandoned child too?” Yunho wonders aloud. “I thought he’s from a very well loved family, only unfortunate one. Why people abandon person like Junsu? He’s well-mannered, polite and..

      “A solitude. He never goes further than co worker, classmate or employee. Two friends for four years? Hyukjae is close to him but where’s Ji hyo?”

      “What’s wrong of living alone? You live alone most of the time.” Yunho scoffs. “You have parents and you choose to live in apartment.”

      “It’s different, buddy. I don’t build walls from people who want to know me better. Junsu is polite because it discourages people to get to know him further. What? Will you waste time to people who always speak politely to you all of the time? It’s good at first but annoying after a while.”

Yunho must agree.

      “But Changmin..

      “The opposite of Junsu. He speaks whatever he has in mind. He uses fists too.”

Yunho is quiet.

      “Still say you are not interested?”

      “We don’t need more details on Junsu since all the required information and the reports so far are good.”

      “Okay. I’ll make it personal challenge then.”

      “Wait. I wanna hear the rest too.” Yunho states in defeat. “junsu is a good person. I know it.”

      “I second that, paw. There’s always surprise in a good person more than the bad one.”

Junsu opens the door to their flat. Changmin has a hard time waiting for Junsu’s answer. They go to kitchen to store their purchases in silence. Junsu doesn’t answer. His expression remains the same. Changmin’s wholehearted question doesn’t have any impact on him. The younger’s heart shatters in uncontrollable beats as he bites his lips with unnecessary force, cursing himself for being too stupid asking such personal question.

Junsu places the last udon wrapping inside the shelf and closes it. He turns around, meeting Changmin’s face color who drops two shades. Changmin stands not far behind Junsu, battling his crumbling see-through emotion to appear okay.

      “Hei.. “ Junsu pats Changmin’s shoulder. “Why the folded face?” He smiles shortly. Changmin wants to shake his head, saying he’s fine with gesture but he fails.

      “You didn’t answer.”

      “I didn’t? hm? Oh.. your last question.” Junsu walks past and reaches kitchen’s table. He pulls one chair and sits on it. “Is it important?”

Is he kidding? Changmin almost meets a breathing problem asking and waiting for the answer and Junsu doesn’t take it seriously?

Junsu chuckles lightly when Changmin’s face shows irritation and being offended. Being hurt too but Junsu keeps it to himself.

      “Sit here.”

The tall boy sighs and moves his feet to sit on the pointed chair.

      “I love my parents, I love my grandparents, I love my friends, I love you too.” Junsu taps his finger on the table twice.

      “Not that kind of love.” Changmin sits stiffly. “Like what my aunt did with her boyfriends.”

Junsu shrugs.

      “I don’t know. Perhaps I have.”

He had, the crumbling castle inside Changmin collapses twice faster.

      “Who would you think will take a second look to a mere store assistant, Min? the books?”

 Changmin’s will to sit straight has evaporated the moment he heard Junsu’s answer.

      “I loved someone and I hated that person at the same time too.” Junsu sighs. “I never saw anyone more lovable yet so difficult to understand like him. It’s not like your aunt’s way in loving her boyfriend though. It’s close to that but I didn’t love him that way.”

Changmin wants to scream on the top of lung in Junsu’s face. He wants Junsu to stop! His heart just meets its most painful state and he can’t bear it.

      “We argued most of the time. I kinda regret it now. I wish I could be more tolerant and understanding. I wish I wasn’t that lenient and had held my voice stand straight against his will.”

Changmin’s hand is touched and squeezed lightly. Junsu sees the fist made. He holds Changmin’s hand gently to loosen the hardened and rock stiff figure.

      “He’s my twin.”

Changmin has a problem listening well to anything he doesn’t want to hear. He is shaking inside; the pain of knowing Junsu had loved someone is beyond his self endurance. He doesn’t know why it pains him so much. Junsu was a neighbor who cared about him before Junsu takes him in and lets him stay in Junsu’s flat. Why is it so unbearable knowing Junsu had cared and loved someone else?

      “Min?”

Changmin’s voice is gone too.

      “I tell you this because I don’t want you to have the same regret. I don’t want you to waste your time thinking that none cares about you. Yunho cares, Jonghyun cares, your parents too thought they don’t show it well.”

Changmin’s hardened fist is squeezed again.

      “I lost my twin. He passed away when we were in middle school. I hated him when he’s alive because of our arguments but I came to realize how much I loved him after the funeral. Don’t hate your parents or your aunt like I did to my twin brother. They might not understand you due to many things but I’m sure they love you deep down in their hearts.”

Junsu stands up from his seat and goes to the stoned Changmin.

      “I love you too.” He hugs the stiff tall boy’s shoulder and head.

      “Like.. you loved your twin brother?” Changmin mutters in difficulty. The slicing sharp knife doesn’t stop its repetitive cuts crushing Changmin’s heart.

      “Silly.” Junsu cards Changmin’s hair, chuckling. “You are not him, hero.”

      “I..

      “Jonghyun and you are close. Do you see him like you see me?”

      “Jonghyun is my friend.” The stabbing pain kicks Changmin hard. “You are Junsu.”

      “Exactly. You are Changmin.”

      “But I don’t love Jonghyun.” Changmin nearly chokes because the painful is too big. “I never see anyone like I see you.”

Junsu pulls his hand from carding Changmin’s hair.

      “Because you haven’t met a lot of people yet. You are eighteen. There are so many things ahead waiting for you.”

      “Your latest drawing is chosen. We sent it together with the other selected drawings this morning.” Ms. Parvati informs the unspirited tall student. “It’s really well drawn and beautiful.”

      “Thank you, ma’am.”

      “Is there anything bothering you? You don’t look fine.”

      “Um, nothing, ma’am.”

Changmin walks in defeat. He’s been feeling down these days after the revealing fact that Junsu just loves him as brother. It’s even less than a rbother because Junsu clearly said Changmin is not like his late twin brother. Changmin is faaarr below Junsu’s deceased brother. His scores dive low to Cs and two B-s. His homework was returned to be revised and both his school and class project are left ignored. Jonghyun fails to cheer him up. That obnoxious friend of his has done everything to call out the sunflower back to life but he meets dead end. Changmin is so crumpled and sad he feels like he doesn’t want to go home and see Junsu. Seeing Junsu just adds the weight in his heart and mind. He draws more and more till all the pages of his drawing book used up. He feels so miserable he is lost what to do and what to react.

      “Hey Changmin!”

Changmin doesn’t hear it at first. He keeps on dragging the old rusty bike on the road heading to his Junsu’s flat.

      “Hooeeyy.. yo boy!”

A police car pulls its brakes in front of him, blocking his way. The window film is sliding down slowly revealing one familiar officer face. Detective Park Yoochun.

      “Not riding your steel horse, knight?”

      “Broken chains.”

      “Hop in, I’ll take you home.”

      “No, thanks.” Changmin is really not in mood to entertain the slick smart detective.

      “We can have it fixed in my usual garage. Free. I know the owner well.” Yoochun persuades.

      “Is it far?” changmin is reluctantly giving in. “I need to be home before dinner.”

      “You’ll be there before six. Come on!” Yoochun has grabbed the old bike and stationed it on the back of the police car’s baggage.

Changmin puffs his cheeks and gets in the car. He buckles the seatbelt and lets Yoochun drives.

      “You have a lot of time for a detective.” Changmin utters, his mood is as sweet as salted raw lime.

      “I’m just smart.” Yoochun smirks. “Are you possessed by a moping ghost or have you just lost a big lottery?”

      “None of your business.”

      “I’m concerned about your tongue, boy.” Yoochun is amused. “If it meets the right person, it will curl up to your throat for being too snarky.”

Changmin folds his arms.

      “How’s Junsu? Last time I met him, he was a bit pale and thinner.”

Changmin sits straight. He faces the driving detective curiously.

      “When was it? Junsu never said he met you.”

      “Last week? I passed Kim’s bookstore for investigation three blocks from your Junsu’s work place. Not really meeting him, hoho.”

Changmin curls his nose in irritation. Does this detective forget something called not aggravating a problem kid?

      “He’s fine.”

      “You know.” Yoochun takes a right turn after checking the traffic flow. “It amazes me how Junsu takes you in when it’s clear he doesn’t like people's company.” The detective glances at the tall student. “Yunho’s co worker, you’ve met her, Rae Im, was actually objected on your staying with him after we did a short background check.”

      “You did background check on Junsu? Why?” Changmin shifts his sitting position, paying Yoochun more attention.

      “Regular procedures. I did very brief check when he came to the station and paid your bail-out. It’s not everyday a neighbor came and took care of a juv- I mean kids with problems. Yunho knew nothing about him; he met Junsu for the first time when he went to your bi- aunt’s flat. You were giving us hard time by not cooperating.”

      “Adults don’t really listen to teenagers like me.”

      “Gotta agree with you on that part but it’s not all true, kiddo.” Yoochun. “Some of us might not take you seriously. We don’t have all time in the world to deal with social problems. It’s the social department’s jobs.”

Changmin looks away.

      “So.. from there, I gathered that your Junsu lives alone. He’d been living alone since he came to GreyFair. Did he tell you he lived in the store’s basement for a year before he moved in to his flat now?”

Changmin rounds his eyes and shakes his head. He doesn’t know.

      “Well, he lived in storage room of a convenience store too before he works in the Kim’s bookstore.” Yoochun fills in. “I heard his ex employer praised Junsu for being a helpful watchdog on the store for free in return for being allowed to live in the storage.”

Changmin gulps. He never knows Junsu had such a hard life.

      “He rented a flat last year and he opened his door for you to live with him. Isn’t it amazing? He could let someone else to share his flat if he wants to. He’s a handsome young diligent man. I’m sure there are many people who are more than willing to live with him yet of all people he could get advantages of sharing his flat, he chooses you.”

      “What do you mean, detective?”

      “Don’t insult your brain, boy.” Yoochun pulls the police car over in front of a busy garage. “You know what my wasting words mean.” He turns off the machine and climbs off the car.

Since the garage is busier than its usual days, Changmin’s old rusty bike must spend some quality time in the garage. Detective forehead talks directly to the owner about the bike. The owner agrees and as Yoochun said before, it’s free of charge. Changmin casts his gazes around the busy workers fixing and repairing cars and motor. He bites his lips as he remembers what Yoochun just told him.

      “I’m hungry. Let’s eat something before I take you home.” Yoochun snaps his finger at Changmin’s blank look. “There’s a tasty rice cakes and shrimp soup over the block. Come on.”

      “I have to be home before dinner.”

      “You’ll be there fine. Hurry.”

Changmin should have trusted his instinct better that Yoochun doesn’t just help him. There is a hidden motive behind all the gallant helping deed and it’s too late to regret his decision getting in yoochun’s police car. They (yoochun, actually) buy two portions of warm mouth watering shrimp soup with a bowl of rice and iced orange squash. Yoochun insists to eat the order there as Changmin grunts and has to follow the detective. He eats fast and finishes everything in ten minutes. Yoochun raises his eyebrow but says nothing. He enjoys his meal in delight (or by purpose in Changmin’s opinion) and takes his time.

      “Yunho loves this soup.” Yoochun wipes his reddish face, satisfied. “We often come here to eat something.”

Changmin nearly throws a retort ‘no one asks’ to the detective. He needs to be home asap. It’s already six and the sky is getting dark.

      “Can we go now?”

      “Easy, boy. I’m full. Relax.”

      “You said I’d be home before dinner!” Changmin accuses. “You-

      “Don’t rush things. Give me five minutes to digest.”

Changmin makes a face.

Yoochun doesn’t head to Changmin’s flat. He drives south ignoring Changmin’s protest. Changmin raises his fisted palm when Yoochun keeps driving. The detective stops after ten minutes and points his finger at a building. Kim’s bookstore.

      “Watch this.” He gets out from the car which is parked far from the store. “You’ll see what I mean.”

Changmin narrows his eyes but he steps out from Yoochun’s car and walks after the detective. Yoochun leads him to one spot next to the store. Kim’s bookstore is connected to stationary and accessories stores on its left and right. Perhaps the owner of the bookstore has a cooperation policy with the stores next to it and enables shoppers to see the smart neat layout of the store. Changmin has been there twice so he knows.

      “That’s Junsu, isn’t it?”

Changmin blinks as he catches Junsu’s standing figure.

      “Watch him.”

      “Why?”

      “Just watch.” Yoochun crosses his arms. “I’ll tell the shop assistant that you are taking a look here.” He leaves the student alone.

Changmin watches. Junsu is helping some customers getting their needed books. He is friendly and smiles politely toward people coming and talking to him. His hands move as he speaks. Changmin doesn’t hear the voice but he could clearly see Junsu.

      “See his eyes?” Yoochun is back beside Changmin. “They are kind and friendly toward customers. Not only customers, to everyone working there too.”

Changmin just watches.

      “He is a helpful employee. Works dilligently and never forgets to smile. Too bad the smile is a well trained one, not even reaching his eyes.”

Changmin keeps watching. Three school girls approach his Junsu and shyly talk to the worker. Junsu smiles at them and leads them to the other section of the store.

      “When I asked the other employees there, I found out interesting stories.”

      “What stories?”

      “Several co workers have crushes on Junsu. Male and female. Junsu treats them the same. He doesn’t see them beyond co workers line. I heard there’s this line of ‘Junsu’s phase’ in the store. Those who have interests in Junsu finally give up after a while. Junsu is nice and kind but he never opens more than just co worker.”

Changmin sees Junsu walking back to his previous post.

      “You met the manager, Kim Jaejoong, right?”

Changmin nods, eyes are all on his sun.

      “He shouldn’t lend three millions to any employees without the approval of his father and the other managers but he did it for Junsu.”

Changmin slowly changes his view to Yoochun.

      “Other than Hyukjae, he never opens himself to anyone but you, boy.”

Changmin stares at the detective, the fire in his eyes are boosting.

      “People rarely interest me.”  Yoochun casually stares back at the boy’s sharp eyes. “If you work long enough as homicide detective where bodies found every now and then for ridiculous reasons, you’ll understand. Junsu caught my interest when I saw him coming to my station. He’s a neighbor but he went that far to take you out of jail that night.” the fire in Changmin’s eyes multiplies. “When I talked to him, all I’ve got is polite feedbacks. No humor, no jokes, no real life. It challenges me to find out who your Junsu is.”

      “And?” changmin’s fists are ready to strike.

      “I haven’t told Yunho this. He would pick you out from Junsu’s flat as soon as he hears what I’m going to tell you.”

      “What is that, detective?” Changmin grits his teeth.

      “He had a twin.”

Yes, sir, Changmin knows, twin that Junsu loved.

      “His parent favored his twin more over him. Junsu argued a lot with his twin because of that. He was blamed most of the times for what his twin did. Perhaps.. after years being the second shadow of his twin, he thought he’d had enough of it.”

      “Junsu left home?” Changmin’s voice trembles.

      “No. his grandparents took him after his twin died. His parents were too sad after his twin’s death and couldn’t work on their marriage anymore. They got divorce a year after his twin’s death.” Yoochun goes on calmly.

      “Why? Why didn’t Junsu live with one of his parents?”

      “He was a brutal teen. He fought a lot and was angry at everything. His parents were too busy with the divorce and Junsu was sort of ignored or being mentally closed out from the divorce process.”

Changmin uses his best self control not to punch the store’s wall.

      “Yunho would tolerate that part. Junsu is a different person from his teen. But, I doubt Yunho will let you stay with Junsu longer when he knows who caused the death of junsu’s twin.”

Changmin closes his eyes because he doesn’t want to hear. That’s a lie. That’s impossible. Junsu is the kindest person Changmin has ever met. He tells Changmin to respect and love his parents and aunt despite the fact that those people do not want to be involved with Changmin. That’s a lie. A lie!!!!

      “It’s your junsu. He killed his twin.”