“It’s your decision to make…,”

Strangely, that moment, the night seems to have a bad mood swing. Just earlier the night was so hot. It suddenly becomes so cold as the rain starts to fall down to the earth. The night is still young as it’s only past 10pm. The atmosphere in the bedroom is super tense and awkward. Nichkhun lost idea of what he should talk. It’s the end for them. He turns his gaze towards Wooyoung. Their eyes meet and create a weird spark in their heart. Something in Wooyoung’s gaze seems like telling him to keep moving on with their relationship. Wooyoung’s expression is so gloomy. Even though the room is only brighten up by the candle, Nichkhun still can see clearly Wooyoung’s somehow sad expression. Wooyoung supposed to be happy with his offer.

“Youngie~” Nichkhun shifts his position, facing Wooyoung. He supports his head with his arm, staring at Wooyoung.

“Hmm…” that is all that can Wooyoung says. He is at the dead end. There is nothing more he can say or does if Nichkhun is willing to let him go earlier than he is expected. Back then, Wooyoung might be the happiest person if Nichkhun let him go. However, now that he starts to like Nichkhun, he feels his heart cramps due to the pain of feeling hurt, thinking that he and Nichkhun is no longer together after this.

“Do you really want this separation? Be honest to me… do you want it badly???” asks Nichkhun sternly but still in a soft way. If Wooyoung do not want to give in, he needs to force Wooyoung to say it. There is must be a slight feeling of Wooyoung does not want to separate for this time being.

“Do you want it too?” asks Wooyoung back. He boldly looks at Nichkhun straight into that man’s eyes.

“I ask you first… do really really really really want it badly? To break up with me??” asks Nichkhun again as he fight back Wooyoung’s gaze. Their eyes never leave each other.

“You?? Do you want to be with me…?” asks Wooyoung. He shifts his gaze to Nichkhun’s neck, avoiding the gaze of Nichkhun.

Nichkhun is taken aback at that question. It has never crossed his mind that Wooyoung would ask that. What should he answer?

“DO YOU LIKE TO BE WITH ME?” replies Nichkhun back with another question. He starts to feels upset a little bit seeing how stubborn Wooyoung can be. What is the point of keeping the pride if he’s going to loss someone that he might actually like, even worst love.

“You? Do you like me? Even after you saw how bad I’m?” Wooyoung gives a counter question. He puffs his cheeks. It is seem Nichkhun is getting his hint, but that man sure wants more than what he is had receives. “Nichkhun! What’s the point of all of this. Even if I want to stay with you and proceed until our wedding day, it’s still useless if you’re going to divorce me. I’m only following your decision. It’s yours to make… if you want to call off our engagement, I’ll just follow it… I really don’t know, just makes the decision on your own, I’ll just follow…” continues Wooyoung as he glares at Nichkhun straight into his eyes. His hands grip hard onto the pillow that he hugged. Wooyoung starts to feel distant.

“W-What if I say we’ll get married and give it a try? Give it our best shot… from the start we never talk about trying to make this thing really works out for real. At least now, we should try and maybe at the end it can be as good as thing that we never expect…” Nichkhun scans Wooyoung’s face to analyze the younger one’s expression. Wooyoung seems shocks but his expression is not as sad as earlier.

“Will it worth a try for you?” asks Wooyoung slowly. He knew that he’s being ungrateful at what he’d got. Nichkhun accepted him without any complains. Despites of his extremely annoying behaviors, Nichkhun still takes a good care of him. “I mean, you can have a normal life… you’re not a gay and you can get the even the hottest girl in the world… I don’t it’s gonna worth it…” continues Wooyoung as he averts his gaze to the outside. The rain falls heavily. His voice almost sinks in the sound of the rain and thunder.

“What if I want to try?”

“Why? You don’t even like me that much…”

“It’s better than not liking at all… just like someone did…”

Wooyoung frowns when Nichkhun mocks him. “Nichkhun, it’s not helping at all if you keep mocking me… plus…I think… I… like… you,” says Wooyoung slowly. Blood rushes all over his head. Wooyoung blushes madly as he says that. Nichkhun also flusters a bit.

“You… you like me? S-since when…?” Nichkhun stutters with his words. He unconsciously forms a smile on his face.

Wooyoung turns his gaze at Nichkhun for a while before he stares back to the balcony.

“I-I I don’t know… don’t think it the wrong way… I like you… just like you as a friend maybe… I’m not sure on how to say it. You’ve been so good to me.  So good that I can’t find any reason to hate or not liking you anymore…” explains Wooyoung. He sighs at the end of his words. It’s true that he really don’t know what he feels right now. Wooyoung feels confused at his own feeling. It’s all mixed up and blends too much until he can’t see clearly what’s inside his own heart.

“So, do you want to give it a try?” asks Nichkhun as Wooyoung still haven’t answer his question earlier. He clenches his fists nervously. His lips curve into a small smile when Wooyoung nods his head slowly.

“But I can’t promise you,  I can control my bad behavior from happening again…” says Wooyoung, informing Nichkhun that there’s might be chances for them to go back to their cold war moments.

Nichkhun smiles bitterly at him. Wooyoung is right; any wrong steps will lead them to a war and will meet the end.

“It’s okay. Just please; try to cooperate with me… anything you want to say or need to know, just ask me upfront… don’t jump into a random conclusion. I know I’m not an angel, chances are, I might do what they say… but ask me first before you make the judgment…,” pleads Nichkhun. He lays on his back staring at the ceiling. Wooyoung is too quiet beside him. Whether Wooyoung is processing his words or just thinking about other things. Nichkhun startles when he hears a small sobs reaches his ears.

“Youngie~ are you okay? How your body condition lately?” asks Nichkhun full of concern. He realized that it’s the peak time for Wooyoung to become very sensitive and having moods swing. Adding to it, the fight between them might disrupt Wooyoung’s health. Stress is not so good for Wooyoung; it will affect his body condition.

Seeing Wooyoung starts to cry for real, Nichkhun pulls Wooyoung into his embraces to sooth him. Nichkhun pats Wooyoung’s back softly as he mumbling some nice words to calm Wooyoung down. After a few minutes, Wooyoung fall asleep in his embraces. Right at that moment, the electricity is on again. Nichkhun smiles when he sees Wooyoung is sleep deeply in his embraces. He also smiles because he misses to hug Wooyoung and now he gets the chance to do so.

Nichkhun lifts Wooyoung slowly on to the bed after he has convinced that Wooyoung will not wake up if he moves. Nichkhun tugs the blanket neatly on Wooyoung’s body and leaves the night lamp on. Nichkhun’s heart screams to stay and sleep with Wooyoung there. However, he has this thought of Wooyoung was asking him to stay earlier just because of there’s no electricity. As the electricity is back, automatically what Wooyoung is said about sleeping together is automatically cancelled. Moreover, Nichkhun do not want Wooyoung to see him as a person whose take advantage on him. However, before he goes out leaving Wooyoung, Nichkhun shamelessly steals a kiss on Wooyoung’s lips.

-

Nichkhun wakes up when he feels someone shakes his body. He surprised to see Wooyoung is in his room, in the middle of the night.

“Youngie~ what’s wrong?” asks Nichkhun as he sits on the bed, looking at Wooyoung with his sleepy eyes. He feels weird about Wooyoung’s behavior tonight. Wooyoung look sad and upset. “Did you have a nightmare?” asks Nichkhun again. Wooyoung still stand still in front of him, glaring at him with upset gaze.

“I’ve told you to stay with me tonight… why did you leave me alone?” asks Wooyoung, finally let out some words from his mouth. Nichkhun startles when he sees Wooyoung starts to sob. “You don’t have to do that to me…, leaving me when I told you to stay. Do you hate me because of my behavior? Do you really want to get away from me??” asks Wooyoung in his sob.

Nichkhun pulls Wooyoung closer to him and hug the younger one. Nichkhun shocks as he feels Wooyoung’s body feels a bit hot. “Shh… I’m sorry. I don’t mean it that way…,” says Nichkhun as his hand pats softly Wooyoung’s back. Nichkhun sighs, thinking that Wooyoung is not in a good condition. It must take a lot of thinking to do for Wooyoung to apologize and reconcile with him. Maybe it caused Wooyoung to depress.

“Y-You h-hate me…” stutters Wooyoung. His hands clenches tight Nichkhun’s shirt. His sob becomes heavier.

Nichkhun lost of idea on how to comfort Wooyoung. He already knew that beforehand that Wooyoung is extremely sensitive and emotional when he’s stressed and his body condition is in a bad condition. However, this is the first time he encounters with that situation.

“Shh… let’s sleep… you’re tired…I’ll not leave you again…” Nichkhun tries to pull Wooyoung to lie with him on his bed but Wooyoung refuses and push him away. Wooyoung is still sulking and upset at him.

“You don’t have to force yourself to be with me! You hate me already… you’ll leave me again… you hate me…” Wooyoung insists to say that to Nichkhun. He glares at Nichkhun as he cries softly.

Nichkhun sighs. Why Wooyoung must makes fuss right now. It’s only 2am and he’s got meeting to attend tomorrow. Nichkhun gets off from the bed and approaches Wooyoung. slowly he wraps his arm around Wooyoung’s waist.

“I don’t hate you… and I’m sorry for leaving you, sleeping alone in your room…”Nichkhun caresses Wooyoung’s back softly as he inhales Wooyoung’s scent. Wooyoung stays still in his embrace, whimpering quietly.

“Y-You h-hate… hates me…” stutters Wooyoung as he stares at Nichkhun’s chest to avoid the older one’s gaze. Nichkhun lifts Wooyoung’s head to face him. Without any warning, Nichkhun closes their gaps and plants a chaste kiss on Wooyoung’s lips.

“I don’t hate you… don’t behave like this… you’re tired, so am I. let’s sleep. I won’t leave you…” Nichkhun pulls Wooyoung to the bed and helps Wooyoung to lie on the bed. Wooyoung seems calm or maybe too startle to go against him because of the sudden kiss. Nichkhun takes his place beside Wooyoung. Afraid of Wooyoung to cry or making fuss again, Nichkhun pulls Wooyoung closer to him and hugs him. He lets Wooyoung to put his head on his chest. Nichkhun’s hand trails down Wooyoung’s arm and laces their fingers together when he finds Wooyoung’s hand.

Wooyoung, who’s not in right mind, nuzzles his nose on Nichkhun’s chest. He feels somehow secures in Nichkhun’s embrace. He glad that he has another chance, to be in Nichkhun’s embrace once again. Within a few minutes, he falls asleep again, deep and sounds in Nichkhun’s warm embrace.