"Ya, Yoseob-ah we need to talk." I say grabbing on to his backpack.

"There's nothing to talk about." He keeps walking. 

I grab onto his sleeve to stop him from going. He looks into my eyes with anger, but then they soften as he looks at how desperate I am to talk. 

"Aish, fine you have two.. No one minute." He sighs.

"What the hell happened to you?"

"Nothing ever happened, I told you it was all just an act I never really wanted to get along with you." 

"Don't pull that crap on me, I know that wasn't all fake." 

"Even if it was fake, I really don't want to be close to you now." He turns his gaze away from mine. 

"Why? Was it that kiss?" 

"It wasn't the kiss. I just don't wanna be close to you anymore."

"But I like being close friends with you! Why do you choose to be friends with me and then push me away." 

"It's just the closer we get.. The more I..." He stops mid-sentence. 

"The more you what?" 

"The more I.. The more I like you.." He says barely loud enough for me to hear.

"You... You like me? Like in the way it's more than friends?" I try not to blush.

"Yes! Do you get it now? I can't keep getting close to you if I just end up liking you more. I can't do that to Junhyung." 

"I can't believe it.." I mutter.

"I'm not asking you to accept my feelings or anything. Just understand the position I'm in."

"It's just that... I.."

"What? You like me too?" He jokes. 

"I might.." I stare at him blankly. 

"You're kidding right? If you are, it's not funny."

I just shake my head. 

"What the hell is the matter with you? What the hell is the matter with me too? How can we both do this to Junhyung?" Yoseob freaks out.

"We haven't done anything! And nothing's going to happen, arasso?"

"Ne, nothing." He nods. 

I just walk away from Yoseob with a big mixture of emotions. I feel really really bad that I have feelings for another guy while Junhyung has been really sweet. And it's his best friend. Although I feel terrible for having this feeling I can't help but have butterflies in my stomach knowing that Yoseob likes me too. I'm a terrible human being. I look at Junhyung waiting for me from far away, looking at me with his sweet eyes. 

Stop please. Don't be good to me, hate me. 

With these mixed feelings the only thing I do when I go up to Junhyung is to hug him tight and burry my face in his chest.

"Gwenchana? Jiji?" He asks, worried. 

"Can we just stay like this for a little bit?" I hug him tighter. 

He hugs me back and my hair with his hand gently. 

I hate myself, I'm doing this to you even though I have feelings for someone else. But a part of me can't let you go, even if I don't deserve to be with you like this....

 

~A Few Days Later~

After all that things got really awkward between me and Yoseob. He started to ditch school too, and when I tried to go over to his house for practice no one would answer the door. The days I do see him he barely says anything to me, but even if he's ignoring me the days I do see him fill me with some sort of excitement. So I guess in a way I still kinda like him. The good thing about not seeing Yoseob so much though is that I'm getting to spend more time with Junhyung. I still feel bad hiding all of this from him though. Still even with Junhyung so close, there's always that part of me that feels lonely.