Taeyeon's POV

I sent her text messages yesterday when I got home from Sunny's place but she didn't reply even once and I wondered why. She probably had a good time with her cousin so I let them be, but it's nearly going lunch now and I received no single text from her. Is she busy or something? Did something....bad happen? No! She's definitely fine! Gosh what am I thinking?! I shrugged my thoughts off and looked back to my monitor. I can't believe I was loooking through a dating guideline site and just couldn't help but to wear a smile and shook my head in disbelief. Well, I just had to as I don't have any idea on dating, well...okay I do have but it's too few and no fun at all. I closed my laptop as soon as I gathered everything I needed. I dragged my body down my bed and picture myself with Jessica on the date I've had just planned. 'I'll take care of your heart, I promise.' I grinned happily as I said the words silently.

After I woke up from daydreaming, I grabbed my phone and pressed on Jessica's phone number hesitantly to make her a call. As soon as I heard the ring, my heart thumped fast. The mere fact that it was Jessica who I was about to phone call made me feel anxious and I just don't know why. I breathed in and out air through my mouth to release the tension that had enveloped in my body. Then, I felt my heart skip a beat when I got through the line and heard Jessica's voice over the phone.

"Hello?" 

My heart was beating crazily. My throat dried up and I couldn't let out a word.

"Hello?? Taeyeon, are you there?"

"Aa..ye..yeah." I said at last.  "Uhm..aa..you were not replying to any of my messages so I decided to call you up. Everything alright?"

"Oh..I'm so sorry Taeyeon. I've overslept."

"Hmm...is that so? You then take your brunch first."

"Yeah.. Thanks.. B-"

"Wait Jessica!" I cut her off. "Can we...meet tonight?"

She went into a pause for seconds before she agreed then we hung up. I just want our first date to be personally asked so I would know if she's happy about it or not, besides I don't want to end the day without seeing her. It would kill me.

Jessica's POV

It's quarter to seven pm now and I'm heading to the Han riverside park to meet Taeyeon.  She didn't tell exactly the reason why but I have an idea of what it is so I have this loud thuds in my chest right now. As I was walking along the street with people everywhere, my gaze bumped onto the men who I think were lovers, indulging themselves in their own little world, displaying affection. I looked away, trying to ignore everything they're into as I walk past them. Just when I was about a few feet away already, I overheard people talking about the men just now as they walk past me. "God, that's disgusting! Sure they'll be burned in hell!"

The words echoed in my head umpteen times and it just didn't stop until my phone vibrated. Are you coming? - Taeyeon

This is harder than what I thought it was yesterday. I looked to my right and I saw people exchanging looks of disgust over the gay men. I looked to my left and I heard people talking about them. I looked ahead and I imagined myself in their position. I closed my eyes and saw nothing but a loud thud of fear in my heart. Is this really what I want?

"Jessica!" I flinched and saw Taeyeon running towards me. I didn't notice that I've already reached the park. I smiled at her when she reached me. "I tho...thought you'd not come." she said as she panted.

"I'm sorry." I said and looked at her face for a moment. I should be brave enough for her. She keeps on doing thing for me and yet I'm here, doing nothing for her. It's unfair, I know.

"No, it's fine. The thing is you're here now." That sweet smile she plasters on her face every time we see each other just knocks me off my feet. And I'm certain, I'd be the dumbest dumb in the world if I let her go. 

We wandered our feet around the park for a moment, not minding where our feet would take us to until we reached a portion with no one else but us. I observed her as she placed her gaze on the Han river. She stared at it for a few more seconds before she laid her eyes on mine. "I'm glad you're here with me tonight, Jessica." I didn't say anything. I just continued to listen. "Did you believe me when I said that I love you?" I heaved a silent sigh and broke away from her gaze then stared back at the river, thought circling around my head. I'm not ready yet. 

Taeyeon's POV

She didn't say anything and just looked away. Am I taking everything so fast? Am I annoying to her now? Then, I heard her say something. "I'm not yet ready for this, Taeyeon." She turned to face me. "And I think I'm never gonna be ready."

Her words hit me like a bullet, right through my chest. Does she mean I should stop it now? Does she mean I should give up? No! I won't! "What do you mean?" I said, trying not to shed a single tear. 

"Tae-"

"No! I won't give up." I cut her off and took her hand. "Look, Jessica. I know exactly what's holding you back. I know it. I know you're scared that people might hate you, might discriminate you, might throw you looks of disgust and might even curse you. But do you think that matters? Are you going to listen to what others say more than what your heart says?" I paused for a slit second. "It's not about what they think, it's about how you feel and what you really want."

"This is wrong..."

"Why? Because they said so? I know you love me, and I love you too. What's wrong with that? I don't get it. Jessica, follow your heart. Follow what your heart truly desires and never think of what might people would think about you, about us. You don't have to be scared because I'm here, in front of you. I'll hold your hand and I'll stay with you. I'll be your strength and you'll be my strength. I'll be your happiness and you'll be my happiness. I'll protect you and you'll protect me. Let's help each other. Let's prove them wrong. Let's make this right....Jessica."

Tears fell down on her cheeks. I wiped them off and smiled at her. "I'll take care of your heart, I promise." I looked straight into her eyes before I pulled her close in my embrace.

"I'm scared, Taeyeon..." she whispered softly. I know she wanted comfort. I know it because I need it too. "Jessica, I'm scared too. We can be scared together." I paused for seconds. Then the Banpo bridge fountain lit up and the water started to dance. I pulled myself back and look straight into Jessica's soul. "I love you."

I know our kind of love is different and forbidden, but I'm willing to take all the risk just to be with her, just to be with the girl I love. I'm not brave enough, but I promise to be braver for her. 

"I love you too, Taeyeon."

___

TBC.