The Emergence of Fears

Warning:- Sugary toothache inducing sweetness and massive levels of cheesiness.

Chapter XXI

The day after found Kyuhyun in a much better mood, thankfully. His anger had faded and whilst he still had a bit of resentment in his heart for the manner in which he was treated, he was mainly just grateful to be with the person he loved. The day before had been trying and difficult but at least he had the person he loved beside him.

 After they had retired to their room, Kyuhyun sent the morning sleeping rather peacefully, positive it had to do with the man he had imprisoned in his arms. He was so attached to the warmth that had been avoiding him that he refused to let Yesung go when the older man had to leave for his activities, childishly refusing to let him go. He expected Yesung to whack him in the back of the head but it would seem the affection from the morning had carried over, Yesung instead promising to play with him in the evening if he released him, sweeten the deal with a few soft kisses and a beautiful smile. Kyuhyun was too taken with the smile to do anything productive and Yesung was able to slip away.

He was pleased to report that Yesung had kept his promise and had volunteered to do anything Kyuhyun wanted but it was late when Kyuhyun returned and all he could do was smother the older man in a painful hug and sleep on top of him, Yesung back to coddling him, something that once annoyed him but something that he now cherished. He was so grateful to have him cooing soft soothing words in his ear and brushing back his hair, hands wrapped around him protectively. Kyuhyun was sorry he was so tired that they could not talk much, that being the trend of the day but he knew he would get the opportunity later.

After all they had their whole lives together. He would eventually get to talk to him.

It was with that in mind that Kyuhyun had returned to Yesung's room immediately when he arrived at the dorms, this time not being kicked out at all but invited to come sit next to him on the bed, Yesung reading a comic, Kyuhyun throwing his things on the floor, Yesung raising an eyebrow which Kyuhyun ignored, crawling on the bed to sit beside Yesung, the older man nodding at him, though still immersed with his comic. Kyuhyun as per usual had no love for comic books that took away the attention of the person that he loved. He still thought that he should be the only one that Yesung gave his attention to at all times. Yesung should have been smothering him in kisses and keeping him close and making up for their anniversary lost and all of that.

 As if he could read his mind, Yesung was propping his head on Kyuhyun’s shoulder before the younger man could complain too much, Kyuhyun smiling like an idiot when Yesung reached for his hand, lacing their fingers together, the same warmth Kyuhyun felt more than a year ago still there. The same addiction he felt then  he still felt, savouring the feel of that small hand that had carved its special place against his palms, his fingers caressing the small digits, Yesung seemingly not minding his presence too much, resting against him but still intent on reading his comic book, brushing his hair against Kyuhyun’s cheek, the action creating butterflies to erupt in Kyuhyun’s stomach, that feeling of happiness, the one that he cherished settling in his heart, positive that it would never leave him.

He then promised himself that he would spend all his days like that, just being the person that Yesung rested his head against as he read some stupid comic book. He would be happy it was just that. It would be the perfect existence. He smiled foolishly once more, just thrilled to enjoy the warmth and let lost in the aroma of coffee and cinnamon. He was happy. One year in memories, 40 more or so to make wonderful together. He did hope that they spent those anniversaries without fighting so much though.

That reminded him of something however.

He had not forgotten but the warmth had momentarily distracted him. He still had Yesung's anniversary present for him. With that on his mind now he used his free hand to reach into his pocket, shifting slightly as not to disturb Yesung, who it seemed was too much into his book to notice his movements, the older man not minding that his head was being shifted about by Kyuhyun’s movements, not even lifting his head to see what Kyuhyun was doing. The younger man was having a hard time prying the item from his pocket, wondering when he would learn that he should not put things like that in his pant pockets and expect it to be easily removed, shifting about to pull it out, smiling in triumph when he finally managed to drag the small item out of his pocket and into his hands, eyeing it in happiness before he decided to give it to Yesung.

He supposed he should just do it, swirling it around before he reached across the way and dropped the small box on Yesung's lap, the wooden box falling on the comic, Yesung immediately twisting to look at him and then the box, his eyes widening, face twisting in curiosity, Kyuhyun smiling at him. With tentative fingers Yesung reached for the box, suddenly looking much larger compared to Yesung’s small hands, the older man lifting the box and holding it his hands, examining the finely crafted wooden structure, curious as to what it contained, eyeing it in interest, fingers tracing the carved patterns along the box, smiling at it, before he turned to look at Kyuhyun with that curious expression.

“What is it?” Yesung asked Kyuhyun with interest, eyes looking at him for an answer before he returned to the box in his hands. He thought it was beautiful.

He adored the box, taken by the find carvings and the texture of the wood. He always wondered where Kyuhyun found things like that. He had given him one similar a while back when they were celebrating their day, but that box was slightly different but equally beautiful. He still had that precious gift, hidden away. He was too much of a coward to wear it all the time but sometimes he did, sometime he just liked the feel of it against his skin, he savoured the cold precious metal against his skin and felt that twisting in his heart from the happiness and the sometimes guilt that he could not wear it proudly as it deserved to be. He would love it in his heart though, and he hoped that would be enough for Kyuhyun; hoped that would be enough for him.

 He had never seen Kyuhyun wear his but he supposed Kyuhyun had never seen him wear it either, so that meant nothing. He was happy with just the thought of it but now he had a new box and wondered what was in it. Kyuhyun really had to stop giving him gifts though; it was starting to embarrass him. He had only given Kyuhyun birthday and Christmas presents. He was suddenly feeling guilty. He was still curious though.

“The best way to find out is always to open the box Hyung” Kyuhyun advised but it’s clear that he was being patronizing, smirking with that pretty face of his that Yesung wanted to punch.  The brat was so freaking annoying sometimes. He had to be sarcastic even then, when he was giving him something no doubt beautiful. Why did he put up with that idiot he didn’t know, well…..he did…..stupid loveable snarky brat. Yesung glared at him just out of spite but he only tugged on his cheek, Yesung pulling away making Kyuhyun chuckle.

He wanted to stay mad but the curiosity was clawing at him insides, desperate to know what was in the box. He wondered if it were jewellery since it looked like a jewellery box, but at the same time it was so wooden and masculine looking, nothing like those velvety boxes that the jewellery he bought it mother came in, so it did not have to be jewellery. It could just be a charm or maybe something that he could use. It was not particularly heavy and could just be anything really. He glared at Kyuhyun one last time, elbowing him in the chest when the brat would not stop laughing at him, pulling a face when Kyuhyun just continued chuckling, deciding he would ignore him.

Instead he turned his attention to the box in his hand, the lid, wondering if he should pop it open. Eventually his patience gave out; lifting the lid with a bit of apprehension, smiling when he saw it was indeed a piece of jewellery. A band of some sort he thinks, digging his finger into the box to pull the wide band free. Using his two fingers he set it free, bringing it to his eye line to observe it. It’s silver of some sort, not white gold like last time. Its shinny and simple, somewhat wide but is virtually an ID band that children wear, except that it is wider at the joints, the strings made of beautiful moulded metal that looked well crafted.

 It is far from feminine, indeed looking very masculine oriented but still had that touch of beauty. On the path where the name usually went however was an engraving of some sort, large and bold but oddly covered by other intricate designs. He could read it he thinks, if he looked past the designs. He thinks it Korean but it’s hard to read right away. He loves it though, feeling happy and guilty and everything all at once, but can’t help notice that it looks sort of big, much too big to fit his small wrist.

“It is for me?”  Yesung asked, looking over at Kyuhyun for confirmation, though he was resolved not to comment on the fact that it was clearly too big if it was meant for him. He wanted to be sure though, since Kyuhyun was not the sort that made that type of mistake and considering that he had gotten him a beaded band for his birthday, he knew that Kyuhyun was aware of the size of his wrist, so it was odd. If Kyuhyun had made a mistake however, he was still very happy with it.

“No its not” Kyuhyun confirmed a little too seriously for Yesung's liking, looking the younger man up and down, regarding him seriously to see if he was messing with him. Kyuhyun though, was indeed not kidding, teasing for sure, but he was not lying, Yesung glaring at him, Kyuhyun just shrugging his shoulders as he reached for the band, Yesung giving it to him.

Kyuhyun was a brat he decided. Why did he give him the box if it was not for him anyway? He wanted to smack Kyuhyun, which he did, whacking him across the arm and turning away in a huff, feeling stupid for liking it so much when it was not his, feeling stupid that he was so happy to receive it.

He was seriously annoyed, which unfortunately translated into a pout, Kyuhyun chuckling at the sight. His Hyung was too cute he decided, wrapping his arms around him, head on his shoulder, Yesung shrugging him off, which he ignored, holding on tightly, trying to avoid the elbow he knew would come soon, deciding he had better explain.

“Technically it’s your anniversary present but the band is actually for me” Kyuhyun explained the purpose of the present. He didn’t originally have that in mind, already buying a present for Yesung, which he had somewhere in the car, but after the difficult night he had he had come to realize that something else was needed.

When he left for his schedules later that day he went straight to an acquaintance of his to have the band specially made. He had to keep it quiet and ask for a special favour and pay a lot more than one would usually for silver but he had his wishes made. He thought it was something that was especially required in the situation. The pretty coats and things like that he had gotten Yesung, whilst more expensive was not worth as much he thought. It was the perfect gift in his mind, the one that Yesung needed, even if the band itself was not for him. Kyuhyun had no great love for jewellery and would rather not wear it if it came to it, especially since it hampered his game playing but this would be special to him, to them. It was the best gift he figured, even if the band was not for Yesung himself.

Yesung it would seem was confused, twisting his neck to look at Kyuhyun, the silent question in his eyes. How could the present be his, if the band was not his? Was Kyuhyun gifting him the box? Did he buy his own present on behalf of Yesung? But that still wouldn’t make it his gift. Kyuhyun was being weird again he decided. He didn’t know why the younger was being so insistent on confusing him so much and he still  wouldn’t let him go, Kyuhyun smiling in that way that told Yesung was pleased with himself and whilst arrogance is never attractive, its somehow always attractive on Kyuhyun and sometimes he wants to smack himself for thinking that, but he doesn’t.

 He likes all the little habits of his snarky little demon beloved and even then, when his smirk was biting at his tolerance, he still rather likes him to be honest. Different from the endless love that he felt, just a nice feeling of liking Kyuhyun and he was positive that he was insane for it. He just wished the younger man stopped being such a pain in the and tell him everything. He was about to request as much but Kyuhyun spoke in interception.

“The characters on the band...Can you read them?” Kyuhyun asked, trying to lead Yesung in the direction of what he wanted to say in the matter. Those engraved words were very important to him and he hoped they would be important to Yesung as well. To make it easier for the older man he pulled it directly in his eye line, holding in place as Yesung leaned forward without complaint, eyeing the words with seriousness, Kyuhyun smiling when Yesung began to read through the patterns and identify the words themselves.

“Property...of...Kim...Jong..Woon...Property of Kim Jongwoon? Kyuhyun?” Yesung read slowly, Kyuhyun not even laughing that he was taking that long to identify his own name. The patterning was meant to make it difficult to read at first glance.

Kyuhyun was not hiding it at all. He wanted the words to be there but at the same time he did not want them to be glaring. If you looked at it intently it would be obvious, but not at a cursory glance. He wanted it visible but at the same time he wanted it to be a secret shared between them alone.

 Yesung however could not understand why he was smiling or why he had a band made for himself with Yesung’s name on it. He was no longer even upset, just turning to look at Kyuhyun with curious eyes, his face questioning, looking at the satisfied man with interest. Kyuhyun was happy clearly but he sure as hell was confusing Yesung. Kyuhyun however could not get the grin of his face, though he was mainly laughing at the fact that Yesung was an idiot. How could he still not understand what Kyuhyun was saying? He had just basically spelt out the entire thing for him and the idiot still did not get it. He was adorable though, especially with those large questioning eyes that looked at Kyuhyun like that.

He wanted to pinch his cheeks, but he should explain it to the oblivious idiot.

“Aren’t I the property of Kim Jongwoon? Don’t I belong to you Hyung?” Kyuhyun asked and was not even close to as mushy as it should have been, instead  spoken in this baiting sort of tone that makes Yesung feel like he is some sort of idiot and Kyuhyun is damn well aware of what he is doing, his voice nearly condescending and Yesung wants to punch him his face to get rid of that much too attractive smirk that was taking shape and maybe just bite his nose and then kiss his lips and touch his hair and caress his cheeks..........wait.

Kyuhyun!! that bastard!! Why did he do things like that anyway?

Now he was blushing like a fool and Kyuhyun was a jackass and he can’t even be mad since it’s so goddamn sweet and perfect and Kyuhyun was going to kill him one day with all the random conflicting feelings he made him have. Kyuhyun wanted to be his property…….he wanted to belong to him. How could something like that not make him burn in happiness and blush burgundy? It was just so wonderful and embarrassing and he wants to hug him and strangle him all at the same time.

“It’s creepy” Yesung managed to say, though it was obvious that he loved the whole thing, the words sputtered out as he burned red, trying not to act like a bubbling idiot who was overjoyed that Kyuhyun could say something like that. He was too happy and it was embarrassing for him. Plus, he really did think it was sort of creepy. How could Kyuhyun wear something like that? He couldn’t. Yesung would die from shyness if he ever did. Kyuhyun wanted to be owned by him……..arrrgghhh!!!! He could burst from happiness, biting his lips to keep the face splitting grin away. He had to have some self-respect after all.

“It is” Kyuhyun agreed with a laugh. He saw no reason to disagree. He was practically volunteering to wear a slave band, willingly sacrificing his pride to declare himself the property of another person.

 For a man with his pride to so lower himself, it had to be insane. It was a rather unique action and he completely agreed. It was sort of creepy if you thought about it, but to him it only went to show how idiotic he was with that whole love business. He was not offended by the comment and instead found it cute how he was trying to deny how much he liked the gift and by extension him. He saw the look in Yesung's eyes and those beautiful cheeks that could never fight off the redness. The older man was in glee which naturally made Kyuhyun happy.

He wanted to make some things clear though.

“I know it’s creepy to have a slave band branded with your name, but if me wearing that is the only way you would understand that I have no intention of ever leaving you, then so be it. I won’t ever leave you Hyung. This is probably the only way you will believe me when I say I am yours. I belong to you Jongwoon hyung” Kyuhyun spoke, this time without the teasing or the prodding, no mocking involved, just genuine sincerity behind his words, spoken with determination and force, though is voice remained eerily calm, eyes bright with strength and sincerity, spoken without interruption, Yesung looking at him in awe.

 Kyuhyun didn’t care for his admiration. In fact it annoyed him.

He was just saying something that Yesung was supposed to know. He shouldn’t even have to ever repeat it, but he had an idiot for a life partner and that automatically meant that he had to go out of his way to make him understand simple things. He was aware that it was extreme, but he sometimes thought that was the only way that Yesung would ever truly believe him. He needed Yesung to understand that he was his, that Kyuhyun honestly thought he belonged to Yesung.

He recognized how dangerous and self-depreciating that could be, but in a relationship like theirs, it was always going to be all or nothing. They were doomed at the very start if they had half intentions and were unwilling to let themselves get caught in that web. It was useless to fight it. They had to love each other to extreme levels for their relationship to work, for them to be strong enough to fight for each other. Kyuhyun had no qualms about belonging to Yesung, since he already did, even if it was not so obviously stated.

He belonged to Yesung and Yesung belonged to him. It was as simple as that.

 It would seem however that Yesung needed a reminder ever so often. If seeing his name act as a brand to Kyuhyun was the only way he would understand the commitment Kyuhyun had to their promises to each other then so be it. Kyuhyun was aware how embarrassing it could be to wear something like that, to blatantly admit that he was foolishly in love and would sacrifice everything and anything for the pretty man beside him, that he had just destroyed all his cool points and had just made a ridiculously cheesy confession, but sometimes a man had to be willing to stand up for what he loved and to protect his own future.

They could not have a life together if Yesung continued to doubt his commitment to him.

The idiot had to understand that he was the only one that Kyuhyun would ever want, the one that he wanted to spend his life with, regardless of how difficult their life would be. Kyuhyun sometimes thought that was the hardest part for them of both. They would be able to do anything, anything at all, including telling their parents and possibly sacrificing their hard earned careers. He could do that but he could not bear the thought of Yesung doubting his love, of wondering if they had a future together. They could face the world if they trusted each other. They had to get rid of that doubt or they would be susceptible to a lot of heartache and suffering. If branding Yesung’s name on his skin [ he really did not like that idea though] was the only way the fool would understand that he loved him, then so be it. He hoped however, an identifier would be enough. He would do whatever it took.

♥규 성♥

A/N: So it seems Yesung will have public service, just like Heechul. I think that is a good thing as then we could see him alot more and we may even get selcas. It means he will have an 8-4 public service job and that means there is nothing to stop him from popping up at his parent's cafe in the evennings. Also, since he has not recieved his letter, he is not sure when his service will begin. Lets hope the army lets us keep our Baby Cloud for the duration of the tour...and also --> Yesung replied to Kyu's tweet...seems he didn't believe him...they are too cute!!

Sorry for all the cheesiness in this chapter, but hey, you guys were warned that I am cheesy person...lol