Yoochun placed the phone in his hands down on the table before him, a bewildered expression on his face.

"What's wrong? Who was that?" Junsu questioned him, stepping out of Jaejoong's room.

"It's Changmin-" Yoochun replied, only to be cut off by Junsu's voice.

"How's Yunho hyung?" Junsu interrupted, causing Yoochun to erupt into fits of laughter.

"What?" Junsu said irritably, annoyed by Yoochun's sudden laughter, "I didn't say anything funny and I'm asking a serious question here."

"You did the same thing I did to Changmin earlier," Yoochun laughed, "No wonder we're the second couple after YunJae. Yoosu huh?"

"Yeah." Junsu nodded absentmindedly, "So how's Yunho hyung? You still haven't answered me. Besides, why did Changmin call you?"

"Yunho hyung fainted due to exhaustion and Changmin called you technically." Yoochun replied, trying to ignore the twinge of hurt he felt at how easily Junsu dismissed Yoosu.

"That's weird," Junsu said, scratching his head, "Why will Yunho hyung faint due to exhaustion? I thought they had no schedules planned on that day except for the fan meet itself?"

Yoochun's face darkened as he sighed.

"Yunho hyung's father passed away today. They were supposed to pull out the plu- "

"What!" Junsu exclaimed, "How could that happen? I thought Yunho hyung's father is very fit and strong?"

"Will you ever let me continue?" Yoochun remarked and Junsu immediately kept his mouth shut.

"Yunho hyung's father had a a few days before and was declared brain dead ever since. They were supposed to pull the plug out but they wanted to wait for a while more. The day Yunho hyung returned from China was the day they were supposed to pull the plug." Yoochun explained.

"But he didn't make it on time did he?" Junsu whispered, horror dawning on him, "And Jaejoong hyung didn't know a thing so he said all those cruel words to Yunho at that time and.. oh God!"

"Yes, 'Oh God' would be a perfect summary." Yoochun agreed, "This situation just gets worse and worse."

"Jaejoong hyung.. He doesn't even know a thing," Junsu uttered, "I can't imagine what will happen if he finds out.. This.. Oh Lord. He's going to feel so guilty even though it's not his fault. , Yoochun! What can we do?"

Yoochun smiled weakly at Junsu. From Junsu's choice of words, it was as though all Junsu cared about was how the news of Yunho's father's death would affect Jaejoong and not how Yunho was taking it. Yoochun knew better though. It was not that Junsu did not care. It was simply because it was too painful for Junsu to even imagine the agony that Yunho must be going through that he made no mention of it. Yunho's pain was always their pain. Their sadness was always equally shared and their happiness multiplied by fives. Such was the bond among them.

"We make a plan." Yoochun replied, "We put them together so that they can both make up and stop being so miserable."

"Haha," Junsu laughed bitterly, "You make it sound so easy."

"And why would it not be?" Yoochun retorted, "Why would it be difficult?"

Just like that, Junsu knew they were not talking about Yunho and Jaejoong anymore.

Why would it be difficult?

Honestly, Junsu never did know. When his hyungs first announced to them that they were together, Junsu thought they meant it as a joke and had laughed it away. When he realised they were serious, he was stumped and could not say a thing in reply. What was he supposed to say? How was he supposed to feel? Since young, he had been taught that people of the same gender falling in love with each other were wrong and abnormal and yet? He now had a prime example of abnormality in front of him and they were his beloved brothers; his Jaejoong hyung and Yunho hyung. What was he supposed to do? How was he supposed to react?

"What's with the hesitation?" Yoochun had questioned him when he had not uttered a single word since Yunho and Jaejoong officially announced to them that they were going out, "What's with the sudden silence?"

Junsu swatted his hand away and ran away, hiding in his room. He figured he needed the extra time by himself to think things over and make sense of everything. They were his two beloved hyungs after all and he did not want to lose or hurt them because of his foolish or rash actions or words. He had not come to a conclusion since. After suffering from bouts of insomnia that day, he had simply concluded that Yunho and Jaejoong could do whatever they wanted as long as they were happy. That did not help much though.

Not especially if I'm gay.

Junsu thought to himself as he caught Yoochun's intense gaze.

Gay for my fellow team member.

"Are you okay Junsu ah? You look a bit pale." Yoochun asked concernedly, scanning Junsu for any outward injuries. Junsu smiled. Yoochun was always like this: caring and noticing things that people usually do not take note of.

"Why would it be difficult?"

Yoochun's question rang in Junsu's head as Junsu felt the hesitation ebb away at the sight of Yoochun's worried eyes. Why would it be difficult indeed? He did not know it himself. Fear had always held him at bay and insecurities sealed his lips shut. They had said that feelings would fade with time and Junsu believed them, denying his feelings for Yoochun right until this moment. Feelings that did not fade with time but increased in intensity instead.

"Why is it so difficult? Does it matter if they are gays? Didn't you promise to accept them for who they are when you became their friends?" Changmin had confronted him when Junsu avoided YunJae like plague since their coming out to them.

"Or are you simply scared that the entire world you have built yourself in is collapsing now that you are forced to look at things from a different perspective? Is that why you're avoiding the issue?" 

Junsu punched Changmin the moment the words left Changmin's lips. Anger was bubbling in him and they sought the only outlet present: Changmin. In truth, Junsu knew that Changmin was just concerned about him and was just trying to force him to confront the issue. Denial was unhealthy after all, especially long term denial. Still, what was he to do? If anything else, he already had a prime example of how a gay relationship would work out in their homophobic homeland. YunJae was the best demonstration was it not? A love that did not work out in the end.

"Do you truly believe that?" Yoochun questioned in a serious tone as Junsu realised he had spoken the last sentence aloud, "Do you truly think that their love will not work out in the end?"

"Do you?" Junsu retorted, opting not to answer instead.

"Junsu," Yoochun sighed, "just look at Jaejoong hyung right now. Does it seem like he had stopped loving Yunho?"

Junsu shook his head as Yoochun continued, "Does it seem like Yunho hyung had stopped loving Jaejoong hyung either?"

Junsu shook his head once more, confused at what Yoochun was trying to get at.

"Then what exactly is the problem here?" Yoochun asked exasperatedly, a tint of frustration in his voice, "If they still love each other so deeply, why will their love not work out in the end?"

Rarely had Junsu found himself incapable of speech, but even his never ending chattering self was silenced by the question Yoochun posed. What was the problem here? Junsu could not explain. Neither could he find a good come back for what Yoochun said. How was he to explain the impracticality of being gay in a homophobic country such as South Korea? How was he to speak of the fears that being gay would entail? How was he even supposed to begin?

"Why will their love not work out in the end?"

Junsu had sensed the unspoken question that Yoochun was implying. Just like that, a talk and discussion about YunJae had led to a talk about them again.

"Why will our love not work out in the end?"

Junsu could feel the intensity of Yoochun's gaze as his eyes posed their silent question to him, hoping to grill some answers out of him. Junsu turned away, avoiding Yoochun's gaze. It was like how it was in the past. Yoochun would keep pressing Junsu for answers and would only back down after Junsu started to exhibit signs of stress. Then, it would be as though nothing ever happened, as though the forbidden topic was never breached.

"I'm not backing down this time." Yoochun announced as Junsu dodged his glare once more, "I'm sick of all this ."

Junsu fiddled with the fingers in his lap, carefully avoiding direct contact with Yoochun's eyes as he felt the glare of fury and pent up frustration upon him.

"Why are you always being like this?" Yoochun gritted out in anger, "Why are you always acting like you are not aware of my feelings and the chemistry between us? Do you not love me? Are you that terrified at the prospect of being gay?"

"If that's the case, then why are you always giving me false hope instead of rejecting me out straight?" Yoochun spoke sharply, "Why are you prolonging my agony? If you don't ing love me, just say so!"

Yoochun screamed the last part out as he slammed his fist on the table, shattering his mug that was on the table.

Great, Yoochun thought bitterly as he looked at the two shattered mugs on the floor, now the shattered mug can match my shattered heart.

"I can understand how Jaejoong hyung feel at times like this," Yoochun whispered in the eerie silence that had enveloped them since the shattering of his mug, "I get so tired loving sometimes. Loving a person that doesn't even have the courage to admit his feelings, do you have any idea how difficult that is?"

Yoochun uttered as he got off the couch, leaving Junsu alone. Step by step, he walked away from the couch, the distance between Junsu and him increasing little by little until it was no longer measurable.

"Why is it so difficult?"

Changmin's voice repeated in his mind as Junsu stared at the shattered mug beneath him. Tears pooled in his eyes as his vision blurred, guilt suffocating him.

"Why is it so difficult?"

Author's Note: FINALLY AN UPDATE! ^^ YAY~ ^^ Hope you enjoy this little scene of Yoosu. :D aktf!