Youngbae turned off the faucet and wiped his hands dry on the guest towel nearby.  Walking into the suite, he spotted Amina sitting near the window sill, gazing into the fading horizon.  The sun had already set and there was barely anything left to see.  "Baby, come wash your hands."

Amina turned at the sound of his voice.

"Wash your hands," he prompted again.  "That's what you're supposed to do after a funeral."

She nodded and slowly stood up. 

"Have you eaten anything yet?"  He came around the bed and rummaged through the night stand, looking for the hotel directory.  When he found what he was looking for, he started thumbing through the pages.  He scanned the numbers and briefly looked over to his left.  She was still standing there, unmoving. He walked over and gently touched her upper arms and peered into her face.  She looked exhausted and somewhat still in shock.  "Why don't you go take a shower?" he ordered quietly. "But leave the door open... If you're not done in ten minutes, I'll come get you."

She blinked a couple of times and then slowly nodded once more to clear her mind, before heading to her luggage.  Slowly, she began ping the bag and started pulling out her toiletries.  It helped if she focused on a task, she forcefully told herself.  Otherwise, she kept finding herself thinking too much.  Mourning her father. Reminiscing about the past.  Worrying about her future.  The combination of these things, plus jet lag, was starting to take its toll on her.

Grabbing her things, Amina headed to the bathroom.

Youngbae could hear the sound of running water and see light coming from the bathroom door that was left ajar.  He proceeded with ordering room service.  They both needed to get some food in them before the night was over.  He doubted she had anything to eat all day, especially if she had the first flight into Seoul.  He also ordered them a couple bottles of wine, hoping it would help calm some of the nerves or anxiety that she was feeling. She needed to get some rest tonight.  He worried about her.

She was doing fine earlier.  But as the night progressed, he could tell that Amina was over thinking. Maybe after they talked tonight, some of that stress she was feeling would go away.  After hanging up the phone, he sat down on the edge of the bed and loosened the tie around his neck. He sighed.  He forgot one more thing he needed to do.  He needed to call someone to let them know where he was at.

Youngbae paced the hotel room as he waited for his manager to pick up.  "Hyung... I'm with a friend tonight.  Neh."  Youngbae tossed his tie down on the nearest vanity.  He started ing his collared shirt.  "If you need to reach me, just call my cell.  Jiyong-ah knows the details too.  Neh.  I know about the meeting tomorrow morning.  Annyeong."  He hung up his phone and laid it next to his tie. He started pulling off his dress shirt, keeping on his undershirt when he suddenly heard soft sobs coming from the bathroom.

He paused, his mind working as he silently fought with himself.

Youngbae walked halfway to the bathroom but then stopped once more.  He could hear her trying to calm herself, reigning in the sadness.  She was coping the best way she knew how.  As much as he wanted to go in there and hold her, Youngbae knew everyone needed to go through the mourning process on their own.  She had to - if she ever wanted to heal inside.  With a heavy heart, he took off his dress shirt and waited for her outside.

It took forever to dry her hair.

Maybe she should have let Diane cut it instead of dying it the other week.  She felt her spirits lift slightly at the thought of her friends back in the States.  They were so kind and took her in without questioning.  She suddenly missed their frankness and candor.  She needed it right about now.  She needed to keep her thoughts light.  Not make too many heavy decisions.  Because the last thing she wanted was a meltdown, like the one she nearly had in the shower a few moments ago.

She rubbed her temples.  Amina knew she would have to deal with her father's death.  But she wanted time.  She didn't want to deal with it right now. It felt like a lot of it had come crashing down on her today.  Maybe too much all at once.  She just wanted to tuck it away for now and bring it out later - piece by piece, until an empty hollow was all that remained in her heart. 

Amina turned off the hair dryer and set it back in its cradle on the wall. She took a look at herself in the mirror.  It was still the same reflection that she saw yesterday.  But her heart-shaped, creamy face was less vibrant tonight.  She could see how tired and swollen her eyes looked from all the crying she had done.  Rummaging through her make-up bag, she grabbed her eye-cream and applied a little to the delicate area.  She rubbed chapstick to her lips and applied lotion to every inch of her body. 

Amina grabbed her brush and went through her locks and brushed it until it gleamed and fell in soft waves past her shoulders. Once she was finished, she started packing everything back in its place with deliberate slowness.  She realized she was stalling, her fingers shaking a little.  But she couldn't help it.  She suddenly felt nervous.

She wished she hadn't asked Youngbae to stay.  He had already seen the worst of her today. Mourning the loss of her father so openly while in his arms was the most vulnerable thing she had ever done in her life.  She didn't want him to see another vulnerable side of her tonight.  The side that would let him know that she still loved him.  And still wanted to be with him.

When she sent him the final email last summer, it was the hardest thing she had to do.  It broke her heart with every word she typed because she knew it was all lies.  Every single word.

She told Youngbae that she wanted to break up with him because she felt like their relationship was based more on missing each other, rather than being with each other.  That basically, they didn't really have a strong enough foundation to continue suffering like this.  A fleeting moment that was starting to drain on her, because she could no longer remember why she was still holding on. She was miserable.  She just wanted to be friends.

In the beginning when she wrote him, she told him every detail of her days in New York.  But as the weeks progressed, her emails became shorter and less distinct.  They became generalized and less personal to a fault.  Because she didn't want him to know the truth.  That she was suffering without him.

He had already felt guilty about her being cut off from her family.  She didn't want to add this burden to it.

Looking back, she wished she could have just told him the truth.  Even though he would have initially blamed himself for her failure, at least they would still be together and could have worked it out.  God, she hoped he never found out.  She was so ashamed. She had fought so hard to make something of herself, only to fall flat on her face.

She sighed.

Was it worth it?  She had yet to answer that herself.  All she knew was that their time had passed.  She had broken it off with him, so would just need to learn how to deal with it.

Amina cleaned the vanity and checked her appearance in the mirror one last time before shutting the light off.  Neh, she thought to herself.  She would need to deal with it.  With her light grey camisole and pajama bottom set on, Amina quietly padded out of the bathroom.

At first Amina thought he had left, the room was so quiet.  But as she walked further into the suite, she saw the room service cart sitting nearby with assorted covered dishes and knew Youngbae had at least opened the door for the bell boy.  She found him, sleeping slumped in the hotel recliner, his legs spread wide with one hand lying haphazardly over his stomach, and the other propped up in a relaxed fist against the side of his temple.  She pressed her lips together to keep herself from smiling.  Seems like she took longer than she thought.

Amina approached him slowly and gingerly sat on the edge of the armchair, facing him.  Careful not to frighten him awake, she spoke softly.  "Bae-yah..."  She caressed his upper left shoulder with her hand.  Unbeknownst to her, the ends of her hair teasingly swept against his forearm as she peered into his face.  It was that tickling sensation that roused him awake.  He slowly opened his eyes, hearing her call his name again.

She looked concerned.  "You should go home and get some sleep."

Youngbae eyes traveled from her eyes to her lush lips that were so close to his.  He knew all he had to do was inch forward and they would be within his reach.  He sat up and roughly asked instead, "What time is it?"

She sat up a little and glanced at the clock on the night stand.  "A little past eight."

He creased his brows.  "That's it?"

Amina smiled.  "Must be a sign that you're getting old."  She watched as a small smile formed on his lips.  He was focused on something below.  It took her a moment to realize that he was playing with her hair.  She glanced down.

"Blonde?" he asked, glancing up at her.

"N-neh," Amina replied, self-consciously.  "Umm... I had a friend over there, whose sister owned a salon and they 'hooked me up'." She said the last part in English, causing him to grin.

He raised his eyebrows, his white teeth flashing up at her.  "Hooked you up?" he asked in English.

"Neh," she blushed.

He curbed the urge to pull her into his lap.  "What else did they 'hook you up' with?"  He smiled into her eyes.

Amina's eyes dimmed slightly as she remembered her friends' generosity over the past several months.  They had truly welcomed her with open arms - given her a job, car rides, and even food.  But she didn't say any of those things.  "Style..."

"Style?"

"Neh," she insisted, forcing herself to enjoy this moment with him.  "New York style is definitely different than Seoul style."

He nodded in agreement.  "How's your English?"

"Better than yours," she quipped with no hesitation.

He chuckled. "Is that right?"

Amina grinned impishly.  "At least I say my 'r's' without an accent."

"I can say my r's," Youngbae replied, thoroughly amused.

She raised an eyebrow in challenge.  "Say 'girl'."

"'Girl'."

"World."

"'Worrld'."

Amina scrunched up her nose in disgust.

He laughed at her expression and she couldn't help but grin back at him.

"Did you eat already?"

Youngbae shook his head, his eyes still full of laughter.

She stood up and pulled the service cart towards them, setting it in the space between the recliner and bed.  She examined number of covered dishes.  "Did you order the entire menu?" she quirked an eyebrow at him.

Youngbae sheepishly played with his ear.  "I didn't know what you liked."

With a flourish, she started opening the lids and set them in the empty space underneath the cart tray.  With each dish she unveiled, she kept looking at him.  There was so much food.  "So do I get to return this food if I don't eat it all?" How was she going to pay for this?

"Ani," he half-smiled. He saw the worried look on her face.  "I'll help you eat it," he said, misunderstanding.

She looked over at him and nodd