It was evening. The stars were scattered in the sky like a beautiful sparkling diamonds painted in a black canvas. The air was cool against my skin and I could hear and feel the waves crashing against my feet, digging as I stepped on the soft soaked sand beach. The fresh and yet salty scent of the ocean made my nose tingled but it was a very pleasant smell enough to put a smile on my face.

It was evening. And just like how every evening, I saw him there, sitting on a fallen tree trunk, aiming nothing as he threw rocks into the sand. He saw me approaching. He wasn’t smiling but I knew with the way his eyes sparkled in recognition, he was also glad to see me.

“You’re late again, Jen.” He said, looking up at me as I stood across him. His handsome features were very striking. I loved his sharp eyes, his tall nose bridge, his lips that always curved in a mockery whenever he looked at me as if I would always end up doing something stupid which I always did. I noticed as I sat beside him, that he was wearing a white shirt and denim jeans.

“I’m sorry love, it’s hard to sneak out.” I said, kissing him on his cheek. He gave me a long hard side glance enough to make someone cower except me, his weakness. As I saw the smile broke on his lips, he cupped my cheeks and roughly kissed me on my lips, sending electrifying tingles in my body. My arms, as if they had a life of their own immediately found a way to wrap themselves around his broad and muscular body. And as if I wasn’t contented yet, I moved and sat on his lap feeling his hands my thighs underneath my yellow sundress I purposely wore for him. The feeling of his warm hands and his breath against my chest made me sighed in pleasure.

Even though I saw him all the time, a part of me was longing for him. Longing to be with him, to touch him and to kiss him. I love him. 

As I pulled back and broke our kiss, I smiled wickedly and stared at his mouth. “You purposely bit my lip again, Jen.” He said, chewing his lower lip. I giggled. “Sorry.” I muttered, as I kissed him again. He returned the same sweet gesture to me before he drew back and said, “You should go back to your house.”

I frowned immediately at that. “I just arrived here and you’re already sending me away?”

“Sneaking out and meeting me every night is dangerous for you.”

“But you’re always here.” I mumbled.

“I’m always here because you always come even if tell you I won’t come. You always end up doing stupid things that worry me.”

Chuckling, “Oh, you just can’t resist me.” I teased.  “Let’s just tell dad about our relationship.” I said, cupping his cheek. “We love each other anyway.” I whispered.

I was about to kiss him again when he held my shoulder and pushed me slightly as a frown made way on his brows.

“Do you hear what you’re saying?” He questioned. “He will not accept me. This relationship.” He said, shaking his head.

Suddenly hurt by what he said. “Why? Is it because you’re only working for me as my personal bodyguard and that you came from a poor family? I don’t care about that. We should tell him. I hate hiding you. Us. I want to show you off. Do you know how much I want to just kiss you every morning when I go downstairs and see you at the door waiting for me while looking so sleek, handsome and cool with your black suit and well-polished shoes?” I asked, studying his face that looked serious.

“Do you always check me out?” He asked, amusement written on his face.

“Yes.” I laughed, feeling my cheeks blush. “But you’re such a snob, grumpy man and you always ignore me or act so formal when I come near you. I hate that.”

“I’m just doing my job, Ms. Jenny Park. I can’t always be friendly to you or else they might misinterpret it. And besides, I need to distance myself from you for you always try to flirt with me whenever you get a chance.” He sighed. 

Chuckling, I placed a hand on his chest drawing small circles on it with my finger. "But you like it when I do that."

"Not when I am on my duty." He frowned, as he easily lifted me and placed me beside him. I perched up on his lap once again, laughing at his taken aback face. “That’s why I’m telling you now that we should tell my dad. I’ve done so many things for him so I don’t see any reason why he shouldn’t agree with me on this. I want to be with you.”

"Me too but Jen--"

“I love you Choi Seunghyun, do you love me?” I asked, interrupting him. I looked at him searchingly as I waited for his answer.

“Of course.” He paused.  “I love you, silly.”

Letting out a sigh of relief, I hugged him tight again before I pulled away and cupped his cheek. “Then promise me that you’ll never leave me.”

When he didn’t answer, I leaned and kissed him tenderly. “Promise me, please.” I whispered, squeezing his shoulders as I waited for his words.

“Why are you suddenly doing this?” He chuckled. “But I promise to never leave you.” He caressed my back.

“Not even death can separate us.” 

BOM

I jolted awake, my heart pounding rapidly against my chest as I tried to make out the unfamiliar place. There was nothing I could see except for the darkness that enclosed what I finally realized was the guest room at Jiyong’s house. I let out a sigh of relief.  Sitting upright, I could feel the cold sweat dripping from my forehead to my neck after having that dream.

“why?” I whispered confusedly to myself.

Even now, I could feel the warmth of his lips as I brushed my fingers over my mouth and immediately felt hot tears welled up my eyes. It felt so real I wished I didn’t wake up. It was just a dream but It felt so real the emotions were starting to drown me again.

You’re doing fine. You’re already okay.

Removing my blanket, I slipped out of the bed and headed out of the guest room. It was a good thing there were wall lights that illuminated my way as I walked in the hallway making it easier for me to walk around without bumping the expensive floor vase in the living room. I noticed from the wall clock that it was only 10 in the evening. An hour after I put Miyoung to bed. She had a hard time falling asleep for she was looking for her dad earlier.

In the kitchen, I immediately grabbed a can of beer from the fridge, opened it and took a huge gulped from it. The cold bitter taste filled my empty stomach and knowing I wouldn’t be able to go back to sleep, I sat on the stool over the counter and began to think of that dream again. At least I didn’t dream of the fire.

It was a good dream. A beautiful dream. I tried to convince myself.

As I took another sip of my drink again, I suddenly found myself pondering about my past. Maybe I just really avoided thinking of it but I couldn’t deny that the debt, meeting Jiyong and taking care of his daughter really made me occupied in the past months. Our relationship as well became a distraction for me to stop going back to the way I used to be. But now, maybe it was the dream or the time of the night that triggered something in me that I found myself thinking of who I was before and I what I had become now. So many events ran through my head. It happened already a long time ago and yet I could still remember most of it like it just happened yesterday.     

 

I remember when I was a kid, I liked dressing up and playing tea time in the garden with my mom and my sister. I liked running around in our estate doing mischiefs here and there only to get reprimanded by Mr. Han. I liked getting a piggyback ride from my dad or picking up seashells with him by the shore. I liked stealing cookies, candies and teaching my little sister how to do it without getting caught by the maids in the kitchen. I enjoyed laughing, dancing and most especially sitting beside my mom as I watched her play our grand piano that echoed throughout the living room every time she used it. I enjoyed the sight of her smiling down at me as I naturally mimicked her, pressing the black and white piano keys with my little chubby fingers. I enjoyed accompanying my dad to go fishing in the sea before cooking and eating what we caught afterwards.

I grew up in a well-off and convivial family. I grew up like a normal cheerful girl with countless of neighborhood friends. But somehow, fate intervened and everything had changed the moment my mom died in that tragic car accident. When she passed away, a part of me, dad and my sister were gone as well. I had always wished for the pain to subside but what I didn’t know back then was that it was only the beginning and that there would be ceaseless tribulation about to come in my life.

Gone was the carefree and cheerful little girl.

Gone was the kid who had a childhood dream of playing a piano in an orchestra.

Gone was the generous and kind eldest sister.

Gone was the daddy’s girl.

It was like something shifted in the world and everything turned upside down and suddenly, my whole existence was only focused on being the best and impeccable in every aspect of my life. I did become the best and excellent. But that only showed through the boundless medals, valuable certificates, outstanding grades, job experiences and promotions I had acquired through the years of striving for perfection after perfection. I didn’t mind the people calling me greedy and arrogant for I knew all of them, if not, most of them were driven by their insecurities, envy and grudge I’d no idea where it came from. I wasn’t neither of those things they kept calling me. But I was hungry. Not for something that food could sustain. But I was hungry for recognition and acceptance I had never got from someone I respected and loved.

Park Ji hoon.

My father.

In the past, I thought I was doing well. I willingly did everything he asked me to do to the point that sometimes I almost sounded like a bionic person programmed to say,

“Yes, dad.”

“I’m sorry, dad.”

“It won’t happen again, dad.”

 I had no regrets of pleasing him and doing what he wanted me to do for him for I believed that he just wanted the best for me. But I didn’t feel like I was a daughter to him but a soldier being trained and readied for the war that was about to come. Still, there was a huge part of me that felt grateful for him even now, despite of everything. He was the one who brought me into this world and opened up to me the harsh reality of life. Without him I wouldn’t be able to know my capabilities. Without him, I wouldn’t be able to toughen myself up. His somewhat rigid and authoritarian treatment to me really molded me to be the person I am today. But his ways were also the reasons why I became like this.

Damaged.  

My life back then was very ideal. I was successful. At such a young age, I had attained so much goals in my life. It almost felt like I had my life already pieced together and that I was just waiting for my time to end. It was so perfect that for some reason, I began wondering if that was my only purpose. Forgetting myself, I worked and exerted efforts for our company. Was I happy back then? No. Was I sad? No. I was neither of those things but I was still hungry and competent that I aimed higher.

The higher the better. Day and night I dedicated myself working with skilled professionals I personally picked while thinking of ways to improve our business. What can we do? What sets us apart from the others? What can we offer? What is the quality of our service? How are we going to be able to improve that? Those simple questions became my beacon towards my improvement in handling our own company. Under my management, Jeju Royal Resort became the best hotel and resort not only in Jeju Island but in Asia as well. It was also included in top 10 best luxurious hotels. It earned numerous 5 golden stars for its high quality and fast service in various online bookings and site reviews where guests’ opinions mattered. Parks Incorporation rose higher, topping all the richest with billions of income generation. Still, despite of these achievements, I never get any acknowledgement. Instead, I was being scolded for the mistakes my employees made and for the simple errors I made in our meetings. I was never praised like the way he praised my sister’s success in her acting career. But again, I understood it. In my mind, I thought that maybe he was secretly proud of me and that he was maybe sending me an invisible hug to congratulate me as well. I was his daughter anyway. So, maybe.

 I’d like to think that way before

And then I met Choi Seunghyun. The man who as cliché as it may sound, had rocked my world. He was the epitome of perfection and though it wasn’t love at first sight, I knew from the moment my eyes landed on his, that I was attracted to him. I found it odd for relationships or love in general never became my priority. But there was just something about his enigmatic aura that enthralled and captivated me and made me stole glances at him every time he was around.

He was my personal bodyguard chosen by my dad since he didn't like that I was always driving and travelling alone or sneaking out at night without his knowledge. It was probably the only decision my dad made for me that made me feel sincerely grateful for him. Seeing and being stuck with him every day was something I secretly liked and enjoyed. In the beginning, our relationship was just purely businesslike. Our conversations were just limited to, "Stop following me everywhere I go!" and "you are my responsibility Ms. Park." It was annoying at first, but I grew accustomed to it. And then weeks and months passed, we started exchanging casual conversations that would often lead to personal matters. That was the time we gradually started to know each other. I was an open book to him and told him everything about me. From my mom to my dad and sister. My fears and my worries. The things that made me happy and sad. He was my shoulder to lean and cry on when times get stressful and overwhelming for me to handle at work. When I felt pressure and burden building up on my shoulders because of dad, he was there to listen all the time. He had seen my vulnerability and had never judged me for it. He was the human version of a diary for I would always tell him my day which would always be the reason why our 1-hour drive from work to home would always extend to another 2 or three hours of talking in our private secluded place in the beach. I couldn't remember how or when it all started but I knew between us, I'd loved him first. And just like my dream, I vividly remembered our series of good memories together.

 

“oh wow, this is beautiful!”

Stepping out of the car, I ran near the edge of the cliff and felt my jaw instantly dropped at the magnificent scenery in front of me. The beautiful pristine ocean and the sun setting over the horizon had me gawking in awe. Sighing, I spread my arms and closed my eyes letting the cool breeze to flutter my long hair and my black corporate dress. This kind of tranquility was the only thing i needed after a long day of working and dealing with stress. As i sniffed, i smelled the scent of nature that reminded me of different things like the earthy smell after a rain, the flowers blooming in spring, even tropical fruits, smoke and . . .

Smoke?

Frowning, I opened my eyes and looked over my shoulder only to see the man standing behind me taking a long draw of his freshly lit cigarette.

“You are causing an air pollution.” I said, placing my hands on my hips.

He uninterestedly bore his eyes on me as he leisurely and shamelessly puffed out a cloud of smoke to my face.

Coughing,“Seunghyun!” I exclaimed, stepping aside as  I glared at his poker faced. “Do you know that exposure to second hand smoke is much harmful than the ones you are inhaling right now? Not only you are risking yourself but you are also risking me to a lot of health problems. I can get lung cancer, heart disease, , pneumonia, and—”

“Tsk, So noisy.” He interrupted irritably.

I opened my lips to retort then closed it again. Annoyed at him, I silently turned and just watched the scenery again.

“Fine, that lethal stick. it all you want.”

 “That doesn’t sound appropriate. And don’t tell me you’re sulking again? Stop being sensitive all the time.” I could hear the amusement in his voice as he said that.

Crossing my arms against my chest, I moved away when I heard his approaching footsteps.

“I am not sulking! And don’t come near me.” I warned.

“Since when did you become a health freak?” he asked, nudging my side.

I ignored him. “Since when?” he asked, poking my ribs. I flinched and restrained a giggle but didn’t look at him.

No, don’t. Don’t look. You’re not ticklish there.

When he jokingly pushed me toward the edge of the cliff I let out a loud frightened shriek and immediately turned to him clutching his arm. “Are you crazy? don’t do that!” I hissed, my heart thumping nervously against my chest. I felt his hand tightened around my arm as he flashed his wide devilish joyous grin on me. 

“Why are you always bullying me?” I asked, looking searchingly at him. 

“I’m not bullying you.” He laughed again as he pulled away from me.

He took another lengthy drag from his cigarette that he was holding between his thumb and index finger. “what do you want to tell me here, Ms. Park?” He asked, as he dropped the cancer stick to the ground and stepped on it with his black leather shoes. I swallowed as he eyed me for a second before he tilted his head up and breathe out a long stream of smoke in the air. He looked so cool but I didn’t want to tell that to him.

“My dad wants me to meet Mr. Lee’s son.” I mumbled.

He casted a brief glance at me but didn’t say anything except to pick up a few rocks from the ground and threw it roughly over the  edge of the cliff. “Lee Minho?” He asked, as he bounced the rocks on his hand. I noticed the way his jaw clenched as he threw it again as if he was pitching a baseball. 

“Yes.”  I nodded.

“He’s a good man.” He responded, finally looking at me.

I watched him as the wind blew strongly and messed his brunette hair that he pushed back from his forehead.

“Yes, he’s a good man.” I could hear the disappointment in my own voice as I said those words. That wasn't what i wanted to hear from him.

“You don’t sound happy with that.”

I nodded slowly.

“Why?”

Taking a deep breath, I looked at the ground and then to him again. His searching, calculating gaze had me paralyzed in my spot.

“Because I’m in love with you.” I confessed.

He didn’t look surprised anymore unlike the first time i mentioned it to him but his facial features stiffened.  

“Jenny, Don’t fall for me. We’ve talked about this.” He only said, his voice rigid. 

The words cut deep through me. “I know but you never answered, why?” 

“I am not suitable for you. I will make things hard for you. I will only make you cry. Don’t fall for me.”

I stared at his pained expression that reflected mine. How could he easily say that?

“It’s so sad.” I muttered, studying him.   

“What?” he frowned, confusedly.  

“It’s so sad that you think of yourself like that when you have done nothing for me all this time but to make me genuinely happy.” I said, forcing a smile.

“Jen.” He whispered, his eyes glistening even in the dusk.

I walked towards him and reached my hands out to touch his face. “Don’t you feel anything for me? even just a little?” I asked.

He pursed his lips, studying me for a short while. “I always look forward to seeing you every day, Jen. I’m sure that means something.” He said, staring down at me.

I smiled. “Me too.” I paused, fixing his black tie. “But as much as I enjoy your company, I also want us to kiss, to hold hands, to hug and to date and do things like what couples do. I want you to be mine.”

Letting out a sigh, he removed my hands from his face and turned away from me. I saw him pulled out another cigarette from his chest pocket but didn’t lit it as he placed it between his lips. He looked frustrated and torn. When he had gone silent, I took a steps forward, watching his back before I slipped my arms around him, hugging him from behind. He only stood still but I could feel his warm hands slowly holding mine. My heart rate accelerated quickly.

“You’re out of my league, Jen.” He muttered after a long stillness. “Do you really want someone like me?” he questioned.

I bobbed my head up and down.

 “I am a nobody. I don’t belong to a prominent family like yours. You know that my mom left me and my father is sentenced to a life imprisonment. I am not a good person and I’ve done bad things. Bad things in the past like . . . like stealing and more. Do you still want someone like me? A person who have so many flaws?”

Burying my face on his back, “You were young back then. You told me you only did that because you were starving. You only did that for your own survival, Seunghyun. What you’ve done and who you were in the past doesn’t define who you are now. In my eyes, I only see a good person who is always willing to protect me, to stay beside me and make me smile in the midst of my sadness. No one is perfect in this world. I might have everything in my life right now but I have flaws as well.”

I could feel the lump forming in my throat as I tightened my arms around his waist that he tried to remove. “I had never realized how lonely and empty I was until you came into my life. You showed me all the little simple things that can make me happy like corn and breads.” I paused, chuckling.

“You made me feel something so alien to me. I love you. You made me love you. Can’t you be responsible for it?”

When he forcefully unclasped my hands, I stepped back and looked at the ground instead. The tears welling up my eyes blurred my sight.

I stared at him when he cupped my chin in one hand as a creased formed between his brows. “Are you sure that’s love, Jen?” He asked.

Sniffing, “Of course.” I nodded. 

He studied me attentively and then released his hand. “I could see through you. What should i do to you, woman?” He questioned. “You cry easily, you laugh easily, you get angry and sulk easily. You love me and . . .” he trailed off, his bottom lip. 

“And I love you too, Jen.” He paused, wiping the stubborn tears from my cheeks. 

I could feel my heart swelling with ease and gladness upon hearing that from him. “Really?” I asked, staring at his dark brown eyes that sparkled.  Reaching out his arms, he pulled me into a tight hug. “I have always loved you.”    

---

“You’ve got to be kidding me.”

As soon as I got out of my car, I looked at the man standing across me through my Chanel sunglass. I knew just by looking at his face that making him wait for an hour and not letting him drive me here, annoyed him. I studied him from head to toe and nodded my head in approval. He was wearing a black tracksuit and a white hiking shoes. A small backpack hanging on his hand. 

I shrugged. “Well, I don’t own that kind of clothing.” I said, as I looked around the entrance of Hallasan National Park. I noticed there were only few cars in the parking lot.

“You told me last week you want to climb Mt. Hallasan, Jenny.” He reminded. 

I turned my attention to Seunghyun again and nodded excitedly at the mention of it.

“Are you seriously going up there with that attire?” He scoffed, his judging eyes scanning me from head to toe.

I looked down at myself and smoothed my white Alexander Wang dress and shifted from one foot to the other examining my Christian Louboutin heels.

“uh-huh.” I nodded, flinging my long hair over my shoulder.

“If I knew you were going to do something stupid again, I wouldn't have allowed you to meet me here instead.” he muttered, shaking his head. 

Frowning, “What do you mean stupid? Aren't you glad that i dressed up for you? And I have a meeting to attend to after this little adventure." I paused, grinning. 

"Besides, we’re not really going at the peak. We’re just going to take the Yeongsil trail which isn’t a hard course. And Based on the pictures that I found from Google last night, the way up there doesn’t look that hard. It seems easy and there were stairs as well which is a good thing.” I was about to hook my arm on his when he stepped back obviously not pleased at me.

“Don’t complain if you trip, if you get cold and don’t even ask me to carry you. And why are you wearing a sunglass? The sun hasn’t even risen yet, Jen.” He asked, scowling at me.  

Rolling my eyes, “Why are you being so grumpy again? Fine. I won’t complain, I won’t get cold, I won’t ask you to carry me.  And the reason why i am wearing a sunglas is because my eyes are a little puffy since it’s too early plus I didn’t put any make-up on.” I responded as I shifted my red bag from one shoulder to the other.

“Why is your bag so bulky?”

ping my bag, I eagerly showed him one by one all the good and valuable items inside. “It’s because of my bottles of vitamins, my mist, my camera, cosmetics and little snacks for us.” I grinned. 

“Oh god.” He sighed exasperatedly, as he placed a hand at the back of his neck.

“Are you okay?” I asked, worriedly. “I have a medicine for that—”

Exhaling again, “I’m fine. Just remove that sunglass.”  

“No. I don’t want to.” I said, brushing his hand away.  His jaw clenched as he gave me his usual long stern glance. Uh oh. He was getting angry.

Flashing my sweetest smile, I stood across him and took both of his hands not minding the group of old ladies staring weirdly at me. “Come on, love. Let’s go.”  

 

After an hour and 40 minutes, I could feel my legs giving up already. It was cold and my feet were aching so much that every step over the steep wooden boards that led the trail felt like a torture to me. “Jeez, who even hikes wearing heels.” I heard a group of female hikers said and laughed.

“Me.” I responded abruptly.  

"And at least I look pretty.” I added, as I ascend the last few steps finally reaching the flat plain. I stopped in the corner and sat on the large rock to finally take a rest and admire the beauty of my surroundings. The different shades of green landscape, the rocky huge mountains towering us and the thick clouds partly covering some portion of it made me smile broadly in contentment. Since it was spring, there were a lot of purple azaleas blooming everywhere and different kinds of flowers I didn’t recognize. Bringing out my camera, I began taking pictures of the spectacular view once again for my personal use and business purposes. I was thinking of replacing the old photos the marketing team was using for the package tours we also offered. 

After snapping photos, I placed the camera on my lap and took a deep breath suddenly feeling a sense of fulfillment. Not only it was my first time to be here, but I was with Seunghyun too.

“I have to say I am impressed at you.”

Grinning, I turned to look at the man sitting beside me. “I told you I can make it without your help. And I am always impressive.” I said, as I scooted closer and hooked my arm on his.

“I shouldn’t have said that. Now you’re boasting.” He responded, his warm hands and fingers intertwining against mine. When I looked at him, he tilted his head to the side, leaned forward and kissed my lips tenderly.

“What was that for?” I asked when he pulled away.

“Just a token of my appreciation.” He responded. 

I smiled at that. “We should go back. I have to go to the hotel.” I said, standing up.

“You just got here and you haven’t eaten yet.” He said, looking up at me. His brows knitted together again.

“It’s okay, I’ll eat while we’re walking.” I said, picking up my bag. I took another look again at my surroundings trying to learn by heart and fix in my mind the beautiful scenery. I had a strange feeling it would be long until I get back here with Seunghyun. 

"Okay, let's go." I finally said.

When I stared back at him, I found him bending down on the ground. “get in my back, I’ll carry you.” 

“What? No. I’m heavy.” I responded, blushing.   

“You hurt your ankle earlier, right?” When he stood up again, he took off his jacket and wrapped it around my waist.

 “To cover you up.” He explained.

“Seunghyun-ah.” I muttered, deeply moved by his sweet thoughtful gesture. “You really love me, don’t you?” I asked, cupping his cheek. 

Chuckling, he shook his head side to side. “Stop being so dramatic, Ms. Park.”

When he bent down again, I carefully climbed onto his back making him let out a grunt as he stood up. I didn’t want to decline such good offer afraid that he might change his mind. And when he had his arms secured on my legs that were wrapped around his waist,

“Tell me Jen, you actually like this idea, don’t you?" It wasn’t a question but a fact he already knew. 

“Yes.” I giggled, as I clasped my arms around his shoulders. 

“Thank you, you’re so nice.” I whispered, as kissed him on his cheek not caring about the people looking at us.

 

 

 

 

 

 

I'm having a hard time falling asleep so i decided to update a new chapter. :) This is just a glimpse of bom's past and i will continue the rest in the next chapter (with gbom for sure) ^_^ I don't know why but for some reason i personally like this update. Maybe because i finally got to reveal top's character which i have been keeping from you all for a long time now. lol. You see, when i decided to write this fic he is already part of the characters but didn't plan to reveal him until this chapter. XD 

Again, thank you very much for reading! :) and let me know what you think. I'm curious. :)