I hope you know it’s not your smile that makes me weak in the knees. It’s not your hands caressing my skin that makes my body tremble. It’s not your kisses that make me fall undoubtedly deeper in love with you. No. If I had to tell you what makes my knees weak and tremble and love you, it would simply be you. Yes.

You in the simplest terms.

Your presence, you and everything that comes with you, that is what makes me quake in fear and expectance.
 Any women, any man, could touch me, smile at me, kiss me. But it’s your lips that make me shiver and crinkle my nose. It’s your hands that hold mine that make me feel less alone. Solely is it your responsibility, your right, to hold me and keep me safe and warm. If it wasn’t you… if it wasn’t you it would no longer matter because those touches and kisses and smiles would be nothing.

Those smiles and kisses and touches and gestures of kindness and jokes and laughs, they would be less than dirt under my shoe because they are not yours.

Things that belong to you, they are what matter to me most. Those are the things I cherish and hold so dearly in my grasp. And I know sometimes I hold so tightly I scarcely think it’s sane. I scarcely think anymore anyway.

As time goes on, I become more and more grateful, more and more desperate to repay you for the kindness of your love. So, here, take me. Odd as it sounds, take me piece by piece.
Take my mouth as a whole to kiss yours and make you feel loved, to smile at you to reassure you when you’re afraid and even my sharp tongue to nag you to get things done; they’re yours.
Steal away my legs, even my feet, so they can chase you when you run away from the world, so they can hold us up when we’re falling, so they can tangle with yours as we sleep.
 And here, take my heart. Hold it gently with your callused hands. Take it so you have a steady beat to walk to when your lost. Have it so you remember you’re not alone when you hear it beating like a steady drum.

Take me all.

But, I have a single request. Hold my heart close to your own heart. Protect it with your own ribs; carry it in your chest. Let it hear the beat of your steady heat so it can never feel alone. Make sure to hold it gently; it’s very fragile as you know. I know your own heart as scares stitching across it and self-inflicted pain as well as mine, but let my heart tend to your wounds. Let me take care of you while you take care of me.
I don’t expect your mouth and hands and legs, but please share your heart with me. That’s all I ask.

Even now, as I simply think of you in class, I wish to hear your heart beat. I want to hear it and for you to hear mine.

I guess that’s a problem.

I guess that’s odd. I guess that’s weird. I guess I should stop.

But how could I? With a love like this? So, that’s why I walk through the halls in a daze, waiting to see you. Waiting to be near enough to feel your heat radiating from your body; yes, that’s what I need. That’s what I want, dear god, please.

The bell ringing telling me to leave this god forsaken classroom sounds like an afterthought as I rampage out of the room, making a beeline for what I savored most.

Seeing Jonghyun was such a refreshing thing. He smiled at me as I approached, his hand pressed against the small of my back as we exited the school building. I felt his warmth radiating through his fingers and pulsing into my body from his palm. It was so soothing, so fulfilling to feel so warm again.

We walked out into the sun and even that warmth couldn’t compare to the warmth he gave me. It felt nothing more than a thin sheet over my body, while he felt like a think winter jacket during the middle of summer. That’s the kind of warmth I needed to thaw out my frozen, barely beating heart. Now I felt bursting with warmth and joy.

“How was your day, Jinki?” He asked with that loop-sided smile. I smiled back a bit.

“It was okay. But it’s better now,” he smiled at my response

“I think my day is better now too,” he said, that smile looking so big it could break his face.

We stayed like that, walking with his hand trailing up my back, lingering on my shoulder, sliding acroos the back of my neck; always staying steadily and guiding me, much like he did in my life. We walked all the way home.

If a moment could solidify a theory, I felt our loved confirmed.

This is how I enjoyed my life most. Together, walking, talking. Together, eating, laughing. Together crying, holding. Together comforting, gentle. Together. Just together. Simply being.

That’s all I need I promise.

His hand slid down and his fingers tangled with mine. I felt the calluses on his hands, worn and tired. I felt my hand and realized how smooth they were in comparison. It made my hands no better, but it was just a sad thing to know.

What had Jonghyun been through? What has he done? How has he lived until now?

I have never wondered a bit about him. In love, knowing someone for their past is so different from knowing who they are. Yes, I can memorize the feeling of those callused hands so easily. But now, I wonder, just who are you? How did you become this way? I wondered his favorite things as a child and I needed to know. I desired to know with such a strength it propelled words from my mouth.

“Who are you?”

And they were words, I felt I should have regretted.

But, I don’t regret anything in my life.

(A/N): omg hi.

my bbys. I miss you. ;A;

I haven’t updated or talked to anyone in so long! I miss you so much! Wow, how are you? Have you been doing well? I hope so. Wow. Things have been a little hectic lately. I know that really isn’t an excuse, but it’s really been hindering my time I have to update. But, I can always make time!
Kenny is moving out of our apartment because he’s moving to San Antonio which is in the state I live in. He got a new job and I’m really proud of my dear Kenny for doing so well. My other roommate decided to move in with her other friend too.

So, after a week or two, they’ll both be leaving. So, I’m in between houses I suppose.

 Right now, I’m going to stay with Daniel. But, I don’t like living with him because… it’s a bit straining in our relationship and it kind of “rushes” our relationship. He’s too fancy. So, I might talk to my dad about living at home again or maybe I’ll be Bae’s roommate because he doesn’t mind. I don’t know. I don’t really know what to do.

Well. I miss you guys. I’ll try harder to update more and reply to messages and all faster. I’ve been kind of lacking lately. I haven’t even checked my messages yet. ._. I am a failure. Errgghh. And I haven’t responded to questions on tumblr either. Wow. This is growing horrible.
Also! Welcome to all the new readers! Wow, I have been getting a lot of comments saying such BEAUTIFUL things like “I read your whole story in a day!” and it’s really sweet! So, thank you and welcome!

Also, I changed my tumblr a bit. It used to be annyeongnori.tumblr.com, but I really didn’t like that name. I really wanted noriboy to be my url BUT there’s someone with that url that hasn’t posted in like a year. It kind of . So I changed my url to norisu-kun.tumblr.com!
norisu because nori is my nickname friends call me and risu is what my family calls me. Kun is a Japanese suffix. Prefix? I think they’re call suffix when they come on the end of words. Anyway, it’s just a Japanese suffix like –chan or senpai or sama. So, yeah! That’s me! If you want to follow me that is.
ALSO. AGAIN. I made a new story! I guess this is like advertising isn’t it? But, yeah. I have a new story called “A Wildflowers Blog” and I’m pretty excited about it becauusseeeee, I really want to write something with a different feeling to it. So, I wrote that. It’s supposed to be a lot lighter I suppose, like happier?

So here’s the link for thatt~

A Wallflower's Blog

And I already have one chapter up so I hope that is good and you enjoy it! So, yes.

Well, what I want to know this update is

“What don’t you understand?”

Like, what just confuses you to no end. Like, you just don’t understand why someone does it or how something works or just… something that you just think is dumb in general. I guess I don’t understand how people can be really judgemental or racist or ist. I don’t get it.

So, leave your answers in the comments below and I’ll talk to you again next update bbyyy~.

and I'll reply to messages and wallposts today as well! So, expect that too! okay soooo

I love you

Have a good day

Smile a lot

Stay cute

Beautiful

Funny

Smart

Great

Perfect as always~

I love you bbyyyyyy~

Latahh!

BAI BBY