(A/N): This is a bit mature. I guess it should be rated M, but please don't let that scare you away! But, I was like, what if someone can't read this chapter becuase they're like..... under 18 or something. So, I didn't rate in M. Because it's not that serious at all. No no no~. This is honestly the lightest "" type writing ever on this earth dear god. I will put like a warning kind of marker for the "" starts I suppose and then put another one when it ends. It is extremely light and I didn't even use ANY profane words at all. Like, none. There is not even a mention of the male reproduction organ in this. Ever. But, i still think it turned out pretty good. Not incredibly hot or dirty. But. Good.

“You wore your glasses,” he said pleasantly. I nodded softly. I could already feel the embarrassed flush that was beginning to show on my face. He smiled at me. I could die for that smile. I guess that's why I looked for the damn ugly glasses for an hour after to school just to wear them to his dumb house. All because I knew he liked it when I wore them.

“I like when you wear them. They remind me of before,” he kept smiling. With a tender hand, he cupped my face. His smile directed up at me. I couldn’t smile back, but my chest swelled with all these feelings that are hard to describe. Love? Maybe you could call feelings like that love.

“Before all of this...” he mumbled almost to himself. But, I understood him. We were once so… small. We were small minded because our worlds were so small and our thoughts were so small. Everything was so small and simple and young and innocent. Suddenly, everything seems harsh and it made me so tired. No, I have been sleeping well lately. I was tired in such a different way. The world had been wearing me down. I was tired in the depths of my skin and my muscles because the mind that controlled my body was becoming so weak. My mind was working so hard to understand and figure out why life was getting so hard. I was getting so weak and tired. It seemed the only time I had peace at all was when I was like this. I only had peace when I was here with Jonghyun holding me closely and steadily. I needed something steady.

His hands were wrapping around my waist, his face nestled into my neck. I could feel his breath. We were so close I could smell him. His scent was intoxicating. I could smell his shampoo and the smell of his cologne.  I could hear him. Even in perfect silence, in perfect stillness, I could hear his heart beating, his breath leaving and entering his lungs. Everything seemed so perfect.

One of his hands that was around my waist, traveled down the expanse of my body to my thigh, he gave it a small squeeze. I felt my body tense and tighten in a momentary panic.

“What are you doing?” I whispered my voice slightly hoarse.

“I like touching my boyfriend,” without even looking at him, I knew he was smirking. I hated it. But then I realized he called me his boyfriend and I melted into his touch.

“Oh,” was my only response. His hand ran up and down my thigh. His mouth began kissing up and down my neck. I shivered. Suddenly, I was feeling hotter, light-headed.  I shrugged the feeling off, but it still lingered as Jonghyun’s tongue met my skin. A small gasp left my lips.

His body was just as hot as my own. I felt ashamed, a bit embarrassed even, that I was being touched and marked. But, I made no effort to stop it. But my mind still screamed at me telling that this was wrong. I shouldn’t be doing this; I shouldn’t even be allowing this. I shouldn’t even be there in this room with Jonghyun. I should be at home, sleeping in my own bed, not sleeping with some boy. But my body complied with Jonghyun’s touches, and my head even tilted back to give him more skin to and .

“Do you like this, Jinki?” he asked me, his fingers dancing up and down my leg. I nodded and made some type of noise to show I did.

“Can I keep going?” he asked, his voice unsure. I nodded in a blinded response. My own body was taking control and blindly answering before my mind could even comprehend the question.

“You have to say yes, Jinki. I have to know, okay?” He said, I had never felt so grateful. That was the deciding factor. He cared. He simply cared about my wants and needs. He wanted me to be sure. He wanted me to be ready. I loved him. He loved me. I wanted this.

“yes,” I croaked out. My voice was wavering and shaky, but our eyes met and they were steady. He smiled down at me in the kindest way I’ve ever seen. He pushed own my shoulder gently to signal me to lay on my back. I did as he directed.

(This is now "." I have warned you.)

Before I knew it, I was unfolding. My mind was being loosened at the seams, just as my body was. I felt clothes being pulled off, kisses being left, angry red marks being placed across my body as signs that Jonghyun was there. I was in a frenzy of feelings and emotions and touches and breathes and panting. We were mingling and clinging and making grunts and whimpers.

“There you go Jinki, one more, okay? Just one more,” he whispered. I nodded numbly. My body was being stretched and pulled and twisted in ways that were unnatural for me. But I let it continue. His fingers continued on with their work. I was being stretched in a new way. I looked in between my legs to see Jonghyun’s concentrated face. He was firmly biting his lip, his eyebrows furrowed as if he was concentrating very hard. I smiled a bit and felt safer knowing he was trying so hard.

I still had my shirt on and that was also comforting.  I wasn’t completely exposed. I watched as Jonghyun’s tongue flicked out of his mouth, wetting his lips.

“Just spread your legs a little more,” he said calmly, his free hand pushing on one of my quivering thighs. I complied without question.

“You’re so good for me, Jinki. You’re doing so good,” he whispered. I nodded again, agreeing with everything he said. His mouth met my thigh and he tasted me. I whimpered the first noise I had made in a while. His fingers kept their work inside me just as his mouth worked across my skin. I felt my body tightening and loosening at the same time. I was in a constant tug-of-war with myself. It was the feeling of standing in the ocean and letting the waves carry you into the ocean and back to the shore again. I was constantly moving but I was lying perfectly still.

“So beautiful,” he mumbled as his lips left my skin, his breath leaving goose bumps. My hands were clutching at white fabric on his bed. What was I doing? Why was I letting this happen, I question myself over and over. Is this how things were supposed to be? But, I knew that deep down, I wanted things to be this way. Even if this was so unnaturally wrong, I wanted it more than I had ever wanted anything in my life.

“Are you ready? Are you sure, love?” he voice was calming and sweet. Even though he was asking me of what I thought, I could hear the tinges of lust and want in it. It made me want him even more.

“Please,” I mumbled, not trusting myself to say much more. Then he complied without any more questions.

I was being stretched and pulled and it hurt. I hurt all over. The pressure was being bottled up and I tightened around it, trying to just make it stop. I cried shamelessly. My body was quivering and shaking and I was scared.

“Hush,” his voice was feathers; it was like pain relievers that dulled the feeling I was having. “Just relax, relax…” he cooed. I breathed deeply, eyes still teary, as I forced myself to stop clenching all my muscles so tightly.

“There you go, you’re doing so well. You’re okay,” he spoke like he was talking to a wounded animal. Normally, that would piss me off. But, right now, I just let him soothe me. I secretly appreciated it.

“It hurt,” I said dumbly, my mind lacked better words to say that expressed my feelings.

“I know, baby, I know. I’m sorry,” he patted my sweaty hair softly. His body loomed over mine.  He was still inside me, our bodies connected. I took a moment to relish in it. I let myself enjoy knowing that only we had this kind of bond together, only we had touched and mingled and tasted like this.

Jonghyun started to move. My body was tensing and untensing naturally as a response to his movement. He was all around me then. His scent surrounded me, his body looming over me, he was inside me. He was a part of me. He was everywhere.  He was going deeper and deeper into my mind and body and soul and everything. We were together. For a split second, we were one person, one combined being deeply conjoined. I wanted to stay like forever.

But, the pressure of it kept building and building and at first it was a horrible pain to feel all that pressure pulling and tearing me from the inside. But then, the pressure grew and grew and I craved it and wanted it. It grew and grew and I couldn’t handle much more. I reached out to Jonghyun in instinct. My hand gripped on his shoulder and I let out a silent scream, more of a choked whimper.

I was standing in an ocean again. Constant waves of pleasure washed over me and my body clenched and shook in the joy of it. My body convulsed and my shoulders caved in. I was falling in on myself as the feeling of it just took hold of me. As quickly as the pleasure came, it left. I felt momentarily vacant, until I was being filled again with a new pleasure. It wasn’t as strong as the first wave, but it was warm and filling.

That’s Jonghyun filling you, my mind told me blankly. I whimpered just at the thought of it.

My mind got less cloudy when Jonghyun pulled away and out of me. He was panting. His forehead was sweaty.

(This is the "" ending. Okay. I love you.)

“I love you,” he mumbled it as his head nestled into my neck. I remained on my back, but my legs instinctively closed. His arms went around my waist. He held me, kept me warm, kept me from feeling alone.

“I love you so much,” he mumbled again. I closed my eyes. I let myself go limp in his arms. My body had a dull ache, but I tried not to focus on it and just think of Jonghyun.

“I love you,” my voice sounded weird when I said it. I sounded so weak and fragile. I was never this delicate in my entire life. I guess that’s what having a lover does to you.

“Mine,” he whispered softly, another kiss planted against the expanse of my neck. I didn’t voice it, but in my mind I whispered back a soft “yours.” The call of belonging to someone was so strong. I wanted to be his. I longed to be his. I wanted my body and soul and everything I had to be delivered to him on a silver platter if that could please him.

“All mine,” he whispered again, his voice drifting into my ear. I nodded slowly, silently agreeing with him. He seemed to appreciate this. His mouth molded to my neck again, lingering a bit longer than needed.

But, I was his. All of my self had been marked, tainted, touched, by him. Nothing of me was untouched and unprovoked. He had searched through my mind, my thoughts, my body, my skin. Every piece of me was known to him. Every piece of me was his.

“You’re so perfect,” he whispered. In truth, I knew that I was far from perfect. I knew I was probably more flawed than most. But, Jonghyun made me feel like I was. I knew I was perfect to him. I knew I was the perfect for him and I wanted to be with him because he was perfect for me.

“Stay with me,” I said in a sudden panic. I was so scared of being alone. I was so scared of drifting off to sea by myself. I didn’t want to be lonely anymore. I remembered walking to Jonghyun’s house alone in the middle of the night, scared and cold and alone. I remembered walking down the stair just that morning and my house being so vacant and empty. I remembered sitting alone at lunch every day since elementary school. Then I thought of the warmth of Jonghyun’s arms around me and his breath on my skin and his kisses and his voice and his smiles. That’s what I wanted. That’s what I needed.

“Always, I’ll always be with you. I promise, you never have to be alone again,” without even an explanation, he understood my random drabble of words. I turned to him so our bodies were facing each other. Our chests pushed against each other. Our arms linked. We were together.

We were just together and that was all I needed.  I didn't need to think of school, my parents, my grades, or my future. Jonghyun was my future. He was all I needed. he was all I wanted. And I didn't even have to fight to make him want to be with me. Perfect. That's what this was.

For a moment, everything falsely felt perfect.

(A/N): HI GUISE WASSUP.

Okay~. So, I really missed you guys! You are just so perfect and sweet and wonderful. I hope you liked this weird awkward update.... I hope. I am so sorry I haven't updated in so long! UGH. But, Christmas and all really got in the way. But, I miss you guys, wow. I miss you so much. Anyway, um, you had the best questions for kenny ever omg. Like, they were simply fantastic and I hope they make him very uncomfortable! So, i decided I was going to type out Kenny's questions and then just let him answer on his aff. Everything I type with be in purple and everything he types will be in... green. Green is a good color. I am literally making this up right now, omg. I'll still ask you questions and stuff at the end and that should be good. Yeah. Okay. so, let's do this!

WAIT PS WARNING HERE, KENNY IS PROBABLY GOING TO CUSS A LOT I AM SO SORRY FOR THAT.

my bby rachanasapre asked "what do you love about eachother?"

. How am I supposed to answer this? I'll just make a list or something because how else am I going to explain this?

1. I love how Marcus is really caring. And he likes to make me food and stuff so I don't starve.

2. I love that Marcus is a really clean person becuase he will clean my house for me and he doesn't smell bad.

3. I love that Marcus is really accepting so I can pee with the door open.

4. I love that Marcus is really humble because then I don't have to compliment him that much because compliments are really uncomfortable.

5. I love that Marcus is really good with his hands because that means he's good in bed and I like that.

my bby minhosnoona asked "Kenny, what is your favorite thing about Marcus?"

I really like Marcus' . It like manupuaha buns. But, it's like the steamed kind not the baked kind because the baked kind is glazed. Marcus' is not glazed. It is just really squishy and big. And it's so sad you will never see it in your life I hope you are jealous. haha.

my bby sammiahn askd "if you could be any food, what would it be?"

I would be nori. omfg. DO YOU UNDERSTAND NORI LIKE MARCUS BECAUSE HIS NICK NAME IS NORI HOLFY ING OMFG. LOLLLLL.
But no really, I don't know. Being food is scary people would like chew on me and rip me apart. I WOULD BE EATEN. omfg I would want to be like leeks or something because who wants to eat leeks? like, I would never be eaten and I would probably even survive the apocalypse i don't know.

my bby DaeLITE was ONNN ITTTTTTTT and asked "What is the most common tattoo people request?"

So, it's christmas time or whatever. So apparently like all these white girls are getting their first tattoo for Christmas. And like, WTF WHY DO WHITE GIRLS LIKE TATTOOS OF INFINITY SIGNS LIKE COULD YOU NOT WHITE GIRLS STAHP. All these damn peasents come into the shop saying like "can I get an infinity sign to represent that life goes on forever and like blah blah blah?" NO WHITE GURL. YOU SAW THAT TATTOO ON TUMBLR DO NOT LIE. And they call their tapers and plugs and tunnels GADGES. I'm so dun wit u wiyte gurls. leave my shop 5ever.

"Do you guys prefer long replies or short ones?"

I honestly do not give a at all. A reply is a reply and if you are going to leave one, make it whatever length you want. I do not even care. You could leave a reply saying "poop" and I would be perfectly okay living out the rest of my life. Do whatever you want.
But I'm pretty sure Marcus likes long replies so please make him happy and leave long replies. that would BE TOTALLY RADICAL AND LIKE STELLAR AND STUFF.

"Are you guys religious? If so, what religion?"

Don't you know you don't ask about religion when you first meet someone? TSK TSK. But, yeah we are super ing religious. Marcus is super freaking Christian and he prays and just reads the bible without a damn care. YOU GO MARCUS YOU GO WITH YOUR LITTLE GAY BOI SELF. But, I am personally Buddhist. I converted when i was 18. HOLLAAAA. Dalai Lama is my hero babbess.

my bby sonwolforlife asked 'Kenny, can you please express in words how cute Marcus is?"

Ok. close ur eyes. are you ready? are you prepared? Now picture a chipmunk. Yes, a chipmunk. Now imagine a chipmunk putting all it's food in it's little cheeks. ok. so that happened. cool right? now... imagine a human being doing that. That is marcus. Yes. Marcus is a furry animal eating large quantities of food. Yes. that is him.
No. Ok. I'm joking. I don't even know how to really answer this. Can I just give you example of how he is cute? I'm not even trying to be a ert you guys, but I have seen Marcus COUNTLESS ING TIMES. Like. dear god. but everytime he like takes a shower or whatever he does in the bathroom HE WILL NOT LET ME INSIDE AND IF I GO INSIDE HE SCREAMS AND LIKE COVERS HIMSELF AND OMFG IT IS REALLY KAWAII. oh god, he always goes "KKEEENNNN EEEYYYYY." it's pretty cute you know if you're into that kind of stuff. So.Now I do that all the time to bother him and he turns red and stuff, it's pretty cool. you should try it. and that's why he's cute. But no really don't do that because then you would be a ert.

my bby me_forever asked "What is your favorite thing to do when you're home alone?"

My favorite thing to do is not wearing pants. Pants are uncomfortable. When I'm home alone I like to just walk around . Becuase I can do whatever I want because I am a man. Hell yeah.

my bby SuperJuniorsELF asked "How is Marcus in your eyes, what does he look like to you, how does he make you feel?"

Wow. thank you fangirl for giving me a hard as hell question. That was simply wonderful. like you are probably like a majority of girls, right? and if you are boys, you're probably all like super fem or something. this is going to be hard to explain. I hate explaining.
OK. every not fem guy has a secret list of things that they like. The first thing on their list is not replacable. You can never date someone that doesn't have the first thing on your list. For me, the first thing on my list is a nice . Someone can be perfect, but if they don't have a nice , I'm not going to go out with them. That is the first rule in the man code.
When I saw Marcus for the first time, I saw him as literally some weird... Japanese child with a weird accent and he smelt kind of like rice balls. but then he turned around and his was the most perfect thing I have ever seen in my entire life. because of his wonderful , I decided I would actually talk to Marcus. He seriously had and still has every single thing that is on my secret list of things that I love. that being said, in my eyes, Marcus is absolutely perfect.
When I was younger he made me feel like I was going to pee my pants because he was way smarter than me and he's good looking. Now it's just dope af to see him after work because I feel like wow that's my baby and I can sleep with him whenever I want and he makes me food and that kid ing loves me. That's pretty cool. kewllllll shhyytttt.
Does this satisfy you, fangirl? DOES IT?

ok. good bye. I am so done with you fan girls.

So I read all of your answers and I'm really glad that a lot of you guys have really high goals for yourself and that you want to become such great things. It made me really happy to read your responses.

So, I thought this time, I should ask a question that involved this upcoming year.

What is your New Year Resolution?

What are you looking forward to this year and what would you like to make different and achieve? I think having goals are really important! So, leave your answers and your questions for either Kenny or Me in the comments. Just tell me who they are for and then the right person will answer them.

Okay. I love you bby. Have a good day, have a good week. Have a wonderful rest of the year.

I love you.

you're wonderful.

special.

kind.

smart.

endearing.

funny.

beautiful.

okay.

bai.

awkward.

latahhhhh.