Posted on 14/01/10  

 

 

First of all, I'm sorry that my promises to always love you, protect you, believe in you...
only ended in words and never became actions.

But I love you,
 

When did I become a person who shed tears whenever she heard the four letters that are TVXQ.
Because I'm so sorry, because even then, I still love you so much......

But in all the subconscious doodles and phrases I jot down, your names and your fans' hearts are sewn into them.





SM said you had plans to make a comeback this spring,
Although I knew it was only SM's stubborn plans to bring discord to the fandom, I still expected something.

And when you didn't answer, and when the agency said that the activities would be canceled,
I suddenly felt sad, and I felt hurt.

I also felt slightly disappointed in you.
I had a selfish moment where the most important thing for me was to see you as soon as possible, even if you had to suffer.



I could make myself forget that short moment of time and keep loving you.
But I feel so stupid for feeling disappointed in you for even a second, that I don't feel like I have the right to say that I love you.


Leaving fans.
Hateful SM.
Noisy news.
The world is against you....




I can bear everything else, but the one thing that I cannot stand is a leaving fan.

In these situations, it is the fans' jobs to believe in you more and let you lean on our shoulders though they are small,
and that is a right only given to those who love you, isn't it?


Since when did we..


When did we become people who fell for the trickery of an agency.




Yes, I know that not all fans have been with you for six years.
There are bound to be HUG Cassies, fans who came in midway, and people who used to be antifans but were won over by your charm,
people who are friends with you, fans who were won over with you fourth album, and the migratory fans.



But if they hold the name TVXQ's fan Cassiopeia' then... The six years worth of pain, sadness, loneliness, scars.
And the happiness, joy, hope and happy memories.

Then aren't they people who have shared all this with each other?




Yes, it is true that I said I was disappointed in you.
Depending on how that is perceived, I could have been thinking thoughts
that I shouldn't have been thinking as a fan such as 'We're done.'



But to turn their backs on you...........


that is a very foolish thing to do.


Feeling disappointed, feeling annoyed, feeling betrayed, feeling hurt...
We can feel these feelings about you only because we love you.

When I realized that