Chapter 21

-The Past and the News -

-EUNHYUK’S POV -

It’s early in the morning.. we all waited in the front gate of our school as we decided to go to kyuhyun’s old house.. the one they live with siwon with their parents before they died.. but here we are waiting for the late ones, leeteuk and kangin hyung..

As we saw them leeteuk hyung with kangin hyung running towards us we all make a face..

“hyung!! You’re late” kyu said as he look at teukie hyung

“sorry.. this guy here forgot about this trip and don’t want to wake up.. it took us half an hour!!” leeteuk hyung said as he oint at kangin hyung who look likes he was going to punch leeteuk hyung to disturbing his sleep

“forget it hyung.. is everyone here??” kyu said as he look at everone and the last one is me.. as he look at me he smile

“ne.. I guess kyu” siwon said as he go inside the car

“let’s go!!” hae shouted as he enter the car following by kibum

Everyone enter the car as we sit on the disignated seats there.. siwon hyung is the on sitting infront together with the driver.. then on the second row there is me, kyu sitting beside kibum with hae in the door and the last row is sungmin in the window sitting beside wookie and with kangin and leeteuk hyung..

Everyone is busy doing there stuff inside the car.. as siwon was busy instructing the driver where to go.. at the back sungmin and wookie was listening music while kangin hyung continue his sleep in leeteuk hyung’s shoulder.. as I look at leeteuk hyung he smile at me.. hae is talking animatedly with kibum while kibum listening to him but I wonder if he understand everything while kyuhyun here is quitely leaning his head on my shoulder..

I cheak if he was sleeping but as I look at his face he was wide awake as he stare blankly on random stuff inside the car..

“kyu? Are you alright?” I whisper as I can see him look balnkly on random things

He nod at me but he didn’t make a move..

“are you sure? Do you want to sleep? You can sleep on my sohulder if you want” I said as I look at him

He close his eyes and I guess he was trying to sleep I look at our surrounding as I saw siwon looking in our way and I can see him in his worried state..

I mouthed at him “he’s ok”

He nod and look on the road.. I wish he’s ok.. I can feel that kyu was thinking about the possibilities going on their house.. and what might happen when he was there..

I can feel a droplet of water on my shoulder as I check it I saw kyu’s eyes filled with tears even if it was close and it clearly flowing on his face

“kyu” I said as I cupped his face and brush his tears away

He open his eyes as he hug me and cried.. everyone look at ours as they heard kyu crying siwon look at me and I just shrugged..

“kyu what’s wrong?” I said as I hug him and sooth him

“nothing” he said

“kyuhyun!!” siwon said as he look at kyu with worries plastered in his eyes

Kyu look at him and look at the others as they look at kyu with worried eyes

“its.. really nothing hyung.. I just remember mom that’s all” he said as he lean again on my shoulder and wipe his tears

Siwon look at him and he sigh

“are you sure about this kyu? We can go back if you want to” he said as he look at the road

“ne hyung” kyu answered with his eyes close

Everyone glance at kyu one more time and resume what they are doing

I look at kyu and grab his hand as I caress it..

“kyu.. it will be ok. You have me ok?” I whisper as I lean on his head to take a rest and close my eyes

As I was sleeping my mind keep on dreaming about kyu.. how I want him to be calm and to take awy is sorrow as soon as possible.. if I could only help him to make his feelings feel good I will do it no matter what.. but I know that some feelings will be the same no matter what happen or no matter others are there for you

I woke up when I feel that the car stop and seconds after siwon yell

“we’re here!!!” siwon said

And the sleeping ones woke up and fix themselves.. I look at kyu who was silently looking at the house he once live

“let’s go!” siwon said as he go out of the car and open the door for us

“yeah!!!!” everyone yell as they go out of the car

Kyu silently go out of the car as he held my hand and I can feel his grip tightening.. I stop to walk as he felt it he look at me

“you don’t want to be here right?” I said as I look at his eyes

“what?” he said coldly

“you seems that you don’t like going here at all.. you only do it for your brother but it is hard for you to be in here.. you cried in the car.. you act like nobody is around you.. you even act cold to me and hold me like you are gripping to an enemy..” I said as I still look at eyes straightly

“…..” kyu said as he only look at me

“yah! You two palle!!” siwon said as he look for us and saw us in the gate

“ne!” I said as I walk alone towards the house but I can feel kyu following me

I enter the house and it really look similar to me.. as if I once been here before..i look t the surroundings and I saw a picture.. I look at it and saw the family picture of their family

“we are still complete there” someone said

I look and saw siwon standing beside me as he look at the picture I was holding

“this was kyu when he was still a kid” siwon said as he point at a kid smiling widely and holding a puppy in his hand.. I look at it and smile on what I saw

“cute” I whisper and look at the other kid who is older than the previous kid

“that’s me” siwon said

I look at him and look at the kid in the picture.. he is really him.. then the woman must be their mother and the older guy is their father..

I put back the picture and proceed to the living room as I saw everyone including kyu sitting in the sofa..

“where have you been?” kangin hyung said as he look at me and to siwon

“just roaming around” I said as I look again at the place

“it feels like I was been here before” I said and laugh

Siwon look at me and kyuhyun also.. but the others just laugh at what I said

“maybe in your dreams monkey” sungmin hyung said as he laugh again

“been dreaming you with kyu in this place huh” hae said as he laugh again rolling in the floor

“maybe I dream about this place” I said as I laugh with them but the brothers is looking at me like I said something weird

As I sat on the sofa I feel comfortable..

“aaahh.. so homey” I said

“yah! Yah! We should talk about the rooms!!” leeteuk hyung said as we all look at him

“angel is right” kangin hyung said

Everyone agreed and soon we talk about it

“so.. siwon how many rooms are here?” leeteuk hyung said as he look at siwon

“hmmm.. its 6.. but we can’t use our parent’s room.. so its 5!” he said as he look at leeteuk hyung

“ok.. so pairs and the other one will be solo” leeteuk hyung said

“I will be with kibum!! FINAL!!” hae said as he hold kibum possessively

Kangin hyung look at hae and hae just stick his tongue out and everyone laugh at the act

“kangin.. you want to protect kibum then be with him in the room” leeteuk hyung said and look at kangin

“eh?! No! no! I want to be with you” kangin hyung said and everyone laugh again including me

“ok ok.. so kihae will be the first pair” leeteuk hyung said

“we will be the second!!” wookie yell as he raise his hand together with sungmin hyung who was blushing madly on the act

“voluntary ha wookie.. very impressive..” hae said as he tease wookie

“I want to be with sungmin” wookie said and smile at sungmin who was looking on the floor

“tsk tsk.. too much cheesiness” kangin hyung said who gain a smack on the head by leeteuk hyung

“ok..  so we will be the third pair” leeteuk hyung said

Everyone nod and then look at three of us as we are the one left without rooms

“I’ll be the one in a solo room” siwon said ad everyone look at him

Leeteuk hyung being the oldest among us notice the awkwardness between me and kyu

“no! siwon be with kyu.. you need a bonding time right?” he look at kangin and use his elbow to make him agree

“ne!!” kangin yell

“but.. kyu and hyuk..” siwon said and look at me

I just keep quiet and waiting for kyu to say something.. and I wish that he will say that he want to be with me.. I sigh as I think about it

“it’s ok with me” kyu said as he look outside avoiding everyone’s stare as everyone suddenly look at kyu with a shock at their face

I look at him in disbelief.. I can feel my eyes sting on what he said

“ok.. I will just go to my room I’m not feeling well” I said as I stand and bow at everyone and that’s the time kyu look at me and I just leave but I’m sure everyone was looking at me as I go up in the stairs

-KYUHYUN’S POV-

“ok.. I will just go to my room I’m not feeling well” hyuk said as he bow his head and stood up and walk towards the stairs leading to the rooms

I look at him.. I regret what I said.. It’s just that many things coming in my mind and what he said to me a while ago was right.. all my decisions are for my hyung.. I just want him to think that I want to be here and not to make worry..

I sigh as I think what I have done

“WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU’RE DOING CHO KYUHYUN?!” sungmin hyung stood up as he glare at me good thing wookie prevented him or a hand will surely landed on my face

“mianhe minnie” I said as I bow at them

“what’s wrong kyu?” leeteuk hyung said as he pat my shoulder

“nothing” I sigh again

“don’t fool everyone kyu.. it’s obviously that there’s something wrong”kangin hyung said and everyone nod including siwon hyung

“to tell you the truth.. siwon hyung I don’t want to be here.. it’s painful going here but I do it for you.. I think it will make you happy.. so here I’ am.. but hyukie found out about it and he is the one who told me that what I was feeling right now is just for siwon hyung.. so i treat him in a cold way until now” I said as I lower my head

“you really are a babo kyu” hae said as he look at the door of hyuk

“I notice it that you two act so awkward to each other.. fix it kyu as soon as possible before it comes to worst” leeteuk hyung said and I look at him and nod

I stood up and bow at them as I go to hyukie’s room.. as I open the door I saw him in the bed crouching.. he must be sleeping.. as I approach at him.. I hear a sob.. he was crying

“hyuk” I said as I went in front of him and saw him face full of tears

“mianhe.. I was just too shock on what you said.. I really regret doing it.. I don’t want to sleep with hyung… I want to be with you” I said as he look at me but not saying anything

“hyuk.. talk to me” I said as I brush the tears away from his face

“just.. tell me everything to me kyu.. I can easily read your mind from your expressions kyu..” he said as he sit

I nod and smile.. he smiled at me and stand up

“but kyu.. you’re place is really familiar to me” he said as he look at me

“really?” I said as I look at him and he nod

Because my dear Lee Hyukjae.. you’ve been here many times when we are still kids.. you’re my precious monkey you know that? You are my playmate but you leave me and never came back.. but here you are forgetting everything happen from the past.. even this house where we spent all of our time..

As I think about it.. I promise that I will never tell it to yuk unless he find out about it himself.. even siwon hyung knew that he was the kid I once love before..

So it’s not a love at first sight right?? It was a long lost love..

He look at me as I space out and I just smile and held his hand as we go out in the room and we can hear everyone cheered..

“yah! Yah! Yah!” I yell as I laugh at them

“someone’s happy right now” kibum said as he laugh hugging donghae

Everyone laugh as we all sit on the floor

“it’s already lunch time should we eat?” kangin hyung said

“ne! me and wookie will cook” sungmin hyung said as he stood up and so does wookie

“I’ll help!!” leetuek hyung said but before he could stand up everyone prevented it

“do you want to burn the house angel?! Last time you cook you almost burn our house!!” kangin hyung said as leeteuk hyung pout and sit on the floor

We all laugh as the two prepare something for our lunch

“kyu.. after lunch we will visit mom and dad’s tomb all you all right with it?” siwon hyung said as he look at me I nod and smile

I was not sure if I’m ready to got here but for hyung I will..

Everyone waited and minutes after sungmin yelled that everything is ready as we all go to the dining room seeing all delicious foods in the table

“this is what you call food!!” kangin hyung said as he get a hot from leeteuk hyung again

Everyone enjoy their lunch as siwon hyung informed them on what will happen later as we visit the tomb of our parents and everyone agreed to come..

After lunch everyone go inside the car as we go to the tomb and as we are on our way I held hyukie’s hand he look at me and smile

As we reach the area siwon walk and we all followed him as he stop on a certain burial place..

“this is kyu mom and dad he grown to a young man already” siwon said as he look at the tomb

I look at the tomb and I can’t help not to cry as i can remember my mom and my dad when I was still a kid

“mom.. how are you it’s been a while.. mianhe for not visiting you.. I miss you mom.. everything is clear to me mom.. I love you and please take care of dad there.. dad.. from the start I think of you as a bad father, only thinking and caring for siwon hyung and the time you let siwon hyung gave me to other family I really wish you’re not my father but hearing the reason to hyung.. everything is clear now you’re not bad as I think you are appa.. I miss you.. we didn’t have time to bond to each other.. I wish I saw you as I grow..” I said as I sit while crying

Everyone was crying.. I cried as long as my eyes can’t produce tears anymore ..

As I look at siwon hyung he was crying and smiling at me..

“appa is proud at you kyu” siwon hyung said as he look at me I smiled and stood up grabbing hyukie

“ah!! Umma!! Appa!! This is lee hyukjae.. but call him eunhyuk.. he was the one I will marry when the time comes with us” I said as I push hyukie in fornt of the tomb

“annyeong.. lee hyukjae himnida” hyukie sadi as he bow and look at me I smile at him and so did he

Umma.. do you remember the monkey I always played with?? He’s him.. but he don’t remember everything.. maybe being a kid that time the memories was overlapped by others.. but look umma.. you said before that we will be a good couple and now we are here in that stage.. are you happy umma? I was really happy.. loving him and getting the love I want.. even though form the start I don’t know he was that kid I still love him what more that I found out he’s the kid..

I smile as I look at the tomb.. as time goes by.. we all say  our prayers and we all leave and go back to the house..

As we arrive everyone proceed on their designated rooms as leeteuk hyung and siwon hyung proceed on the veranda..

I look at them but proceed on our room as hyukie was sleeping on my arms I should put him to bed..

As I was putting hyukie to be.. I realize that I should talk to hyung..

I go out of the room and proceed to the veranda but stop as I heard leeteuk hyung’s voice as he talk to siwon hyung.. I stop as I want to hear what they are talking about..

“siwon.. you and kyu was hospitalized at the same time during the time you hit by the car” that mut be leeteuk hyung

“I know.. kyu said to me about it.. he was thinking too much” siwon hyung said back

I look at the two as they are talking seriously.. and I can feel nervousness but I don’t know why

“siwon.. I lied to kyu.. it was not the reason why he fainted and his head hurt” leeteuk hyung said

I got shock as I heard about that.. leeteuk hyung lied to me.. I feel hurt about it

“what are you saying?!” siwon hyung raise his voice as he heard what leeteuk hyung said

“yes.. siwon, kyu has an illness” leeteuk hyung said as I know he was crying now

I feel tht everything turn upside down.. I fel like I was about to cry

“what illness?” siwon hyung said as he look at leeteuk hyung

“the doctor said that he has a brain cancer.. that’s the reason for his headache” leetuek hyung said

As hearing about it.. I feel my knees turn into jelly and I collapsed on the floor and I cried gaining an attention to the two elders in the veranda

He look at my way as they saw me on the floor and crying

“kyu!!!” both of them yell and run towards me

“hyung.. why did you lie to me??” I said as I cried and clutch on his t-shirt

“I… don’t know.. how to tell it to you” leetuek hyung said as he cried and I saw siwon hyung crying too

“hyung.. I’m going to die right?” I said as my hand slightly loosing the grip on leteuk hyung’s shirt

“no!!! kyu!!! Don’t say it!!” siwon hyung said as he stood up and glaring at me

“don’t make me a fool hyung.. I know that kind of disease..” I said as I look at the two with lifeless eyes

“kyu..” leeteuk hyung said as he cried

I sigh and make sure to gain my strength to stand up..

“siwon hyung.. don’t you ever tell it to hyukie..” I look at siwon hyung as he look at me

“kyu.. we will look for cure.. you will be under treatments if necessary” siwon hyung said to me as he cry on me

“no.. I don’t want to” I said

“but kyu!!!” leeteuk hyung said as he look at me in worries

“do it kyu.. for your own good” siwon hyung said as he grip on my arms

I look at him and I just nod since I knw that will make my brother lonely

“but promise me that you will never tell it to anyone” I said as I look at them

“but the treatments will show some after effects and soon everyone will notice it”  leeteuk hyung said as he look at me

“I know.. just don’t tell anyone specially to hyukie..give me time to fix it” I said as I feel my heart broking into pieces

The two nod and I leave as I make sure that hyukie will not notice that’s I cried

The two also proceed to their rooms..as we wait to the dinner to come..

I walk inside the room as I saw hyukie fixing his bag and smile on me as I enter.. I smile as I saw him

“where have you been?” hyukie said as he look at him

I kiss his forehead and sit on the bed before answering

“Downstairs.. I just talk to hyung” I said as I look at him

Looking at hyukie I remember about the news and I feel like crying again

“owww..” hyukie said as he continue to fix his things

I grab the opportunity to brush my tears away..

Hyukie look at me and saw my face

“kyu?” he said as he look at me

“ne?” I said as I look at him

“are you crying?” he said as he look at me again

“a liitle bit.. it just I’m too happy seeing my parents tomb” I lied as I look at kyu

He walk towards me and sit beside and held my hand

“It’s ok kyu” he said as he smile at me and I smiled back

How should I leave this kind of person without hurting him.. should I make it? I wish that when I close my eyes everything is a joke and only a nightmare.. that I will be healthy and will never choose to leave this person beside me..Which is very important to me..