Wouldn't Be here
A FarewellTo my little shinning star.
The night sky just got a new star.
I found the news about you passing on accident, I hadn't been active because of a few personal problems and as such didn't know what you were really going through. When I first heard the news about your death, I was shocked and couldn't believe it, I was in denial and couldn't accept that you were really gone. That night I cried my eyes out while looking at your picture, your smile forever embedded in my mind, you don't know how much pain I was in, it hurt so much knowing that we wouldn't be able to see your gorgeous smile or hear your beautiful voice ever again, you were just too precious for this cruel world.
I don't even have the right to write this, I abandoned you and I'm sorry for that. I'm sorry for not being a good fan, for not being there to support you, for not giving you the love and attention that you and SHINee deserved. I love you so much, you and Taemin were my little cinnamon rolls. You guys mean so much to me, you were the ones that introduced me to k-pop and if you hadn't done that, I probably wouldn't be here.
I remember that it was 'Lucifer' that introduced me to k-pop, one simple accidental click changed my life completely. Back then I was just a little kid going through a rough time, I was depressed and didn't find the will to live anymore, the pain and suffering were just too much for me and I just wanted to put an end to it. If I hadn't clicked on that MV by accident god knows what would have happened, you and SHINee saved my life and I'm forever in debt with you guys.
Thank you for all these years, thank you for all the great music you made, thank you for making me smile and laugh when I couldn't, thank you for loving us, thank you for being such a wonderful and caring person and thank you for introducing me to such a wonderful world.
To all the Shawols out there, this isn't a goodbye because it's not definitive, it's a see you later because one day we will meet with our precious Jonghyun once more.
Rest In Peace my sweet Jonghyun, you did well.
-RadioactiveCupcake , a shawol from Portugal
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