Feelings
Same, but DifferentWe decide to just sleep over at Soo’s for the night. While the guys crash in Seob’s shoebox room, I squeeze with Soo in hers.
“I want to hear the juicy things first,” Soo says as we lie on mattresses on the floor - she doesn't have a bed.
“What juice?” I ask as I scroll through my phone. Rap Mon had sent me another two messages while I was away from the device.
From: RM oppa
[Are you asleep?]
[I just ended my schedule.]
“You and that idol.” Soo snatches my phone away and reads the content on the screen.
“Hey!” I quickly grab my phone back. “It’s nothing.”
“He’s even reporting his schedule to you!” Soo flips to lie on her side and narrows her eyes at me. “It was him you ran off with earlier too, wasn’t it?”
“It was just dinner,” I say, exasperated. “And besides, his manager was there too.”
“And you’re upset about that?”
“Soo!” I sit up and Soo mirrors my action.
“Byeol, we’ve been best friends for so long.”
“And…?”
“I’ve pretty much mastered your expressions and their hidden meanings.”
“What is that supposed to mean?” Reading Rap Mon’s messages again, I reply.
To: RM oppa
[Not asleep yet. You back at dorm?]
“You’re smiling at his messages like you used to when you’ve been waiting for Namjoon and he sends you a text,” Soo takes my hand in hers.
“What? No, I…”
“It’s about time you started a new relationship.”
I let the words sink. No. It’s true I’ve let Namjoon go, but it doesn’t mean that I’ve forgotten about our times together. It’s going to take me a lot longer to really move on, fall in love again.
“Rap Mon is… I don’t know, he makes me feel at ease,” I admit. “He’s comfortable to be with.”
Soo opens to say something but my phone chooses this time to ring. Caller ID shows me that it’s Rap Mon calling.
“Hello?” I answer the call as Soo looks on excitedly.
“You’re not at home.” This comes out more like a statement than a question.
“Huh? I’m at a friend’s house,” I tell him. “But how did you know?”
“I just rang the doorbell and no one answered.”
“What are you doing there?” My eyes widen. Soo strains her ears to hear what Rap Mon is saying.
“To see your face for a while…” I’m not sure if I heard this right because he’s mumbling.
“Quit talking and sleep already,” Woong suddenly pokes his head into the room and says, his voice drowsy from alcohol – the guys had prepared beer but Soo and I weren’t feeling it so the guys drank most of it.
“Ever heard of knocking?” Soo rolls her eyes at him.
“Who’s that?” Mon asks over the line, his voice sounding annoyed.
“Hang on,” I tell him. To Woong, “Go back to sleep.”
“Can I crash in here?” He asks. “Ray snores like a dinosaur…”
Soo gets up and pushes him out. “Then sleep in the living room,” she says before shutting the door. We both roll our eyes when we hear Seob’s room door open and close.
“Maybe we should’ve been a bit more moderate with the alcohol,” I say.
“Why? It’s your birthday and come back celebration. Alcohol was very much needed.”
“It’s your birthday?” A muffled voice brings my attention back to the call on hold.
“Oppa, I…”
“Did you drink a lot?” His voice is much gentler now.
“Hyung…” Jungkook’s sleepy voice breaks through.
“Looks like you’re interrupting Jungkookie’s beauty sleep,” I giggle.
“Byeol…” Rap Mon calls my name and it’s the first time in a while that he’s doing it. I realise that he dropped formalities.
“Go sleep,” I tell him, the sound my name on his lips lingering in my ear. “We’ll talk again tomorrow.” And I hang up.
Soo and I exchange glances for a silent minute. “He likes you,” she says.
“What?”
Soo pauses for a dramatic moment. “And you have feelings for him, too.”
“Say something that actually makes sense.”
“You’re calling him oppa,” she notes.
“So do a lot of people.”
“You never call anyone oppa.”
“I don’t have oppas to call oppa.”
“Woong and Ray are two years older.”
I'm lost for responses on that.
“Remember that time Ray asked why you won’t call him oppa?” Soo asks. “You told him ‘oppa’ sounded too mushy and intimate.”
“But…” But…
“Maybe subconsciously you’re already falling for him.”
A/N: Is Byeol really, now? For her Namjoon oppa?
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