I let the playlist shuffle me to the next song. My feet involuntarily step to the beat and with every step forward, my footsteps become lighter. Is this how people get into the Bangtan fandom? Their songs have this amazing power to chase the grey clouds away.

 

Miss Right, Boy in Luv, the songs play in their random sequence as I walk and walk… and walk and walk. I stop only when my music player is cut off by an incoming call.

 

“What’s up?” Soo says when I answer the call.

 

“Nothing now.” A look at my watch says it’s almost 4PM. I listen to Soo complain about some annoying bar manager before hanging up. A sign across the street tells me that I’m not that far away from home. Turning back to where I came from, I spot a café a short distance back. Lucky I have some cash stashed in my phone case.

 

“Welcome!” One of the workers greet as the door dings open. Out of habit, I glance at the cashier. I heave an internal sigh of relief when I see an unfamiliar lady there. I approach the counter.

 

“Two iced americanos and an iced caramel macchiato,” someone steals my order before I can even think of what to drink. I spin on my heels ready to curse the bastard down but I end up bumping into his chest instead. He was this close behind me?!

 

“Excuse you-” I start, but stop myself just in time as I register the familiar face of Yoongi.

 

“Excuse me?” He smiles down at me as he pays for his order. Collecting his buzzer, he pushes me away from the counter to a table where he pulls the chair out for me. I mumble a thank you before taking the seat.

 

“Yoongi-ssi,” I greet. “What are you doing here?” And why is it that Bangtan is everywhere I go?

 

“We’re on our way to the radio station,” he tells me. “Namjoon’s coffee craving kicked in so we stopped for a while.” He nods towards the van parked by the road outside. Squinting, I see Rap Mon leaning by the vehicle. His legs are crossed at the ankles and he seems engrossed in something on his phone. Yoongi’s buzzer buzzes, pulling my attention away from Rap Mon. He flashes me another smile before getting up to collect his drinks, and returns a few seconds later placing a cup in front of me.

 

“Eh?” I look between the caramel macchiato and him.

 

“Namjoon’s treat,” is all he says before walking off. Outside, he passes one of the americanos to Rap Mon before they both climb in the van. The vehicle drives off. I look back down at the drink in front of me. Shaking my head with a smile, I pick up the drink and exit the café, walking down the street that would lead me back home.

 

I take sips of my drink in between steps. For some reason, my coffee tastes extra sweet today. It’s not how I like it, but it’s also not bad to drink.

 

Before I can feel too guilty about receiving a free drink for nothing, I whip out my phone and take a proof shot of me holding the coffee.

 

To: Rap Mon-ssi

[Thank you for the drink ^^]

 

I attach the picture before sending the message. Just as I slip my phone into my bag, the notification tone sounds. I pull out my phone again to check the incoming message.

 

From: Rap Mon-ssi

[Pretty. Enjoy the drink :)]

 

Pretty…? I blush just by reading his reply. Feeling warm inside despite the cold wind blowing, I skip all the way home with a smile on my face.

 

“Byeol.” Woong calls out as I approach my apartment.

 

“What are you doing here?” Opening the door, I let him in. The cup of coffee – now empty – is still in my hand. Instead of throwing it away, I wash the cup and leave it aside to dry.

 

“I heard from Soo that you called,” Woong says, sitting on the sofa.

 

“You came because of that?” I raise a brow at him. Taking off my jacket, I throw into over a chair at the dining table. I go back into the kitchen to pour myself a glass of water.

 

“Do you really not want to sing again?” He asks suddenly. I glance over at him and notice him staring absentmindedly at the Business Management textbook on my coffee table.

 

“No.” My reply is to the point. Woong looks up sharply.

 

“No…?” He sounds uncertain of my answer.

 

“What exactly is your motive for coming here?” I ask grimly. I’m sick of him always asking me the same question.

 

“Byeol,” he stands up and faces me. I’m standing at the doorway of the kitchen, leaning against the frame. “Isn’t it your dream to become a singer? We can make it work together.”

 

“It was,” I emphasis on the past tense. I don’t get why he’s so insistent on this.

 

“So why don’t you want to sing with us?” Woong is getting exasperated. “Is it because we’re just a small band? Byeol, I swear we’ll become famous soon.”

 

“Are you in need of a main singer?” I ask, trying to make sense of his sudden outburst. “I can introduce some talented juniors I know.”

 

“It’s already been so long since Namjoon died.” There. He finally says it. I glare at him.

 

“He was your best friend.” Tears well up as thoughts of Namjoon flashes by.

 

“And he’s dead.” There is silence for a moment. “It’s time to move on, Byeol.”

 

Now it’s my turn to get frustrated. “This is me moving on. Woong, people change. Yes, singing used to be my dream. But that’s all in the past now. I’m growing up, too. For how long do you want be to be stuck on a futureless childhood dream?”

 

“Byeol-ah…”

 

“If there’s nothing else, leave.” I’m tired, and I don’t think I can take any more of this. Quietly, Woong leaves the house. I slide to the floor when I hear the door close, and as untimely as it is, my stomach growls. I sigh. Pulling myself up, I dig around my bag for my phone. I tune in to the radio and set my phone on the kitchen counter on full volume as I prepare my dinner.

 

“Let’s welcome Bangtan Boys!” The radio DJ introduces. As the boys take turns introducing themselves, I pull open a packet of instant noodles and chop up some scallions as water boils in the electric kettle.

 

“Rap Mon-ssi, you’re looking very bright today,” the DJ says. The kettle clicks and I pour the boiling water into a pot. “Are you dating someone?” The other boys ‘oh~’ at the question. Turning on the stove, I throw the noodles into the water.

 

“Dating…?” Rap Mon laughs. “No, why would I be dating anyone.” As the noodles start to loosen up, I pour in the seasoning and stir around with a pair of chopsticks.

 

“Your face is glowing like you’re in love,” the DJ jokes and the boys laugh. “So BTS came back with ‘Run’ this time round. Do you have anyone who makes your heart run?”

 

“Of course it’s our ARMYs!” I can’t tell who said this because the voices overlapped.

 

“Rap Mon-ssi?” The DJ pinpoints the leader again.

 

“Y-yes?” He sounds so cute flustered. “Someone who makes my heart run?”

 

“Isn’t there?” The DJ prompts.

 

“Of course there is,” Rap Mon says while laughing. “This girl.”

 

My hand pauses at cracking an egg halfway.

 

“Her name is ARMY!” He laughs at his own joke.

 

“Eh~” The boys tease his cheesiness. Cracking the egg into the noodles, I stir the noodles around for a couple of seconds more before throwing in the scallions and turning off the stove. I carry the pot into the living room and place it on a coaster on the coffee table. Going back into the kitchen, I grab my phone and exit the radio app. I bring it into my room to charge before finally settling down to eat.

 

On the floor, I lean against the sofa and switch around channels on the TV for an interesting show. As the evening drama plays, I slowly eat my dinner.

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