Finding the answer

Previously,

You turn around finding Seunghyun skimming through the unfolded paper ball you just threw.

Still holding the paper, he said “You...”

Your POV:

“Seung... Seunghyun-ah, what are you doing here?” I gulped, surprised by his visit.

“To scold you of course. But... What’s the meaning of this?” He put up the paper in his hand.

I could only give him a loud sigh.

“Actually, I’m finding the meaning of that too.” I pouted.

Seunghyun walked towards me and sat at the edge of my bed.

“Let’s see what we’ve got here... So, you don’t know which one is the real you? You don’t know if you should be the low profile girl in school...” he claimes, pointing to the first doodle ,
“or the hyper, playful girl at home... orsomeone who plays a guitar.” He paused.

“Wait up! you play the guitar? Since when?”

“Since long ago my dear brother. But, it has been hard for me to pick up the guitar ever since... ever since...”

“Changjo left you for good.” He continued and shook his head.

“Oh, but I managed to play the guitar recently! When I met Baro Oppa!” I exclaimed.

OOPS! I quickly covered my mouth.

“WHATT?! You don’t mean that Baro Oppa from B1A4? Do you even know them? NUNA! You are supposed to keep a low profile, and now you go around hanging out ith those popular guys! ARE YOU INSANE?!” Seunghyun snapped.

“YOU.CALLED.ME.NUNA!” I beamed brightly, ignoring his outburst. Ohh, just how much I missed being called a Nuna.

“Huh?! Ouh... You’re worrying me that’s why.” He mumbled, scratching the back of his head.

“AIGOOO!~ Why are you so cute?” I pinched his cheeks so hard. I couldn’t control myself when the chubby cheeks were calling out to me. Haha.

After a long squabble, both of us ended up lying on the bed side by side, facing the ceiling, trying to catch our breaths.

“But really, won’t you get yourself in trouble with Appa? And, how are you even going to get away with it when Appa always watches us?”

“I know I’m making a risky move here. But, I don;t want to repeat my mistakes. These B1A4 guys are really decent and I’ve never felt comfortable knowing someone so easily before. This could be the chance for me to overcome my fear after so long!” I ranted to him.

“Well, if you say so that way then I don’t think I can stop you even when you have already made up your mind. But promise me, you won’t stop hanging out with me or treat me differently. Because, believe it or not.... Ahhh, I can’t believe I’m saying this!” He responded.

“What? What?”

“You... are my best friend. And I don’t want to lose my best friend ever. To me, keeping low profile suit my personality. I don’t mind having no friends at all when I have those important to me always by my side.”

I looked at him softly. Never in my life have I seen him like this before. I’m surprised. It just felt so heartwarming to know that I have him as a brother and a good friend by my side.

“Aigoo, Seunghyun-ah! Why are you so lovable? You have no idea how I was able to make it through school because of you.” I pondered, giving Seunghyun a gentle smile.

“Ah, ~~~~! Stop staring at me like that!” He covers his face with a pillow.

“Aww, my dear dongsaeng is blushing!” I teased.

“Aish! I shouldn’t have said anything!” He whined.

“Hahaha! Seunghyun-ah, thank you. Really, thank you.”

Still, one question is left unanswered.

“But, who exactly am I?” I murmured to myself.

“~~~~, don’t dwell on that so much. Imagine how you would be if you don’t have such restrictions because of Appa. How would you act with those whom you are comfortable with? Which one makes you feel that you don’t have to put on an act? I hope that’ll help you figure out.” Seunghyun advised me as he walked towards the door backwards.

“And by the way, you are sooooo gonna get the worst lunchbox tomorrow! Merong! :P” He smirked and quickly shut the door.

Aigoo this guy~ I don;t know how I;m supposed to take him seriously. However, his words still lingered in my mind.

How do I act when I’m comfortable with the people around me? My family comes to my mind. B1A4 even.

That’s it! That’s who I am. The real me. Someone who is playful and high but loves to play guitar when I’m in the mood. But, because I also happen to be a child of Appa who deals with mysterious affairs, I am also that quiet girl everyone sees in school. But again, being a quiet girl is definitely all a pretense. If only I can stop pretending.

There should be a way for me stop all this pretense. I just need to find it.

No one’s POV:

You spend the whole night on your bed thinking about it. You were about to fall asleep when you remembered that you had to text Baro Oppa and Gongchan.

To: Gongchan, Baro Oppa Annyeong! ~~~~ here! Sorry for the very late text! Anyway, I still haven’t firgure out how I’m going to act around you guys... But, I know for sure that I’m going to be that quiet girl before again tmrw. So, do not approach me friendly! You have been warned. Ok, gd night then!~

You read through the text a few more times, checking if it sounds alright, before sending it out. Just after a minute or so, your phone vibrated.

From: Gongchan

Aww :( I have to be that strict councillor who’s mean to you tomorrow then.
It’s okay, I promised I won’t scold you!
Can’t wait to hang out with you again though! When you actually can ^_^
Goodnight, ~~~~-ah, my friend! :)

You giggled seeing the text. Gongchan is really one surprising guy. You never expected that he will turn out to be that bubbly and friendly.

From: Baro Oppa

Warning noted! Haha.
Today must have been tiring for you. Goodnight and rest well tonight. :)

You smiled at the text messages you finally received after so long.
With that, you let your body have a good night’s rest.