Just not ready yet...

Annyeong!~ Back with another chapter on the second day of CNY!~ I’m gonna start school in exactly one week ;( New school, new people(BOYS! I was in a girls' school >.<), new things to study, new CCA. Aigoo!~ >.< It will be a tough year ahead. But still, to you readers also, FIGHTING!~ WE CAN DO THIS! Ok, back to the story :)

Previously,

“Mian. I mean, we are willing to listen you know. If you have anything to share with us.” Man, his words are so appealing that I feel like telling both of them everything that I’ve been hiding from them.

Gongchan even nodded.

A part of me want to tell them everything but another part is forcing me to keep it to myself. What should I do? >.<
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Your POV:

After all the deep thinking, (ok, not that deep since I just simply map out the pros and cons), I finally open my eyes. I’m not that sure if Baro and Gongchan are gonna accept my reply but I’m just gonna follow my heart and say whatever I want. This is it! Yeap, just say it all out! Here goes...

“Umm... Well... Let me just answer this straight. Firstly, both of you are right regarding the mysterious actions or rather my weird, changing personalities. I am hiding some things from you guys or rather, from everyone else.”

Both Gongchan and Baro are listening attentively and both of them start to lean forward to hear me more clearly. I guess both of them are really interested, huh? But, I can’t tell them. Not yet. It’s just not the time.

“Even after this, I’m going to continue acting weird. There will be some lucky days like today when I can act like a friend to you but, there will be times when I have to act like we’re strangers. I will be that loner with no friends to talk to in school again.”

Baro raises his eyebrows, confused while Gongchan looks spaced out. I have a feeling he’s still trying to comprehend what I have just said.

“Sigh. Both of you will never understand. I’m just not ready to tell you everything yet... I guess...” I shrug.

Even I myself, haven’t get the whole picture yet. :/

Both of them go back to their original positions and slowly start nodding, as if understanding what I said. I'm actually doubting both of them. They won’t understand me for sure. I have a feeling they will actually get angry at me for hiding them the truth about myself. AHH!~ What are they going to say? This is kinda nerve-wrecking! >.< Ooohhh, how much I hate this feeling right now!

“Hmm... I think I kinda get you.” Baro suddenly spoke. Gongchan nods as well.

“So... Is this your own lunchbox? Can I have a bite?” Gongchan’s words leave me more dumbfounded. How can he just change the topic just like that?

“Wait! Aren’t you guys not angry with me for not telling you the things that you’re curious about? I don’t understand. Don’t you think of me as a bad... umm... chingu (friend) ?” The word chingu is still hard for me to say but I’m starting to get better at it.

“Well, even though I’m so, SO curious about what you’re hiding,” Baro leans forward and stares into my eyes, “as a friend, I will also have to respect your decision for not telling us yet.” He ends with his usual charming smile.

“Yeap, that’s right! We knew you won’t spill it out so easily after seeing how you could act like the loner girl for the whole time in my class. So, we will just be patient and wait until you’re ready!” Gongchan added.

I stare at both of them for a while. I'm actually surprised. The words that both of them said are totally unexpected and I really don’t know how to react. Somehow, I feel something warm in my heart, as though convincing me that it's a good thing for me to befriend them. It's the first time I’m feeling like that. And, it felt strangely, good.

“Yoohoo! What are you staring at?” Gongchan waves his hand at me.

“Nothing. I’m just… happy.” I smile.

Both of them start to smile too. That's the first time I feel happy and confidently expressing it with a smile. I guess befriending them is not a mistake. I hope it will never turn out to be a mistake.

“Your lunch is very delicious, by the way!~ Did your mum cook this?” Gongchan happily munches my food.

Wait, MY FOOD! No one steals my food except for Seunghyun! Ouh, thinking about Seunghyun... ROOFTOP! I bet he’s all alone. Upset over his lunchbox since he was took the last one just now. Aigoo!~ What a pitiful sight I must say.

“When did I allow you to take my food?!”

“I asked you just now remember? But you just kept quiet and didn’t answer me. Silence means consent :D” Gongchan tried to get away with it.

“For your information, I was quiet because I was thinking. And, just to let you know, I don’t anyone get away after stealing my food.” I smirked at him.

I started to pack my lunchbox, to go to the rooftop. When I was about to stand up, the bell rang, marking the end of lunchtime.

“Where are you going?” Baro asked.

“Somewhere... But it doesn’t matter now anyway. Let’s go for our next lesson.”
The three of us stand up and make our way to our respective classrooms.

Before Baro parted ways, he managed to say something to me.

“About that thing that you owe me, do you think you can do it after school ends?”

“Ouh, that. I’m really sorry for being heavy. Heh. I bet it hurts a lot right?”

“Yeah, it kinda hurt a lot I must say.” He shrugged.

“So what how can I repay you?”

“CanIaccompanyyoubackhometoday?” He said at a very super fast speed. Well, he’s a rapper so yeah. Not that surprised.
“What did you say?”

“Umm... So... you can just repay me by just allowing me to accompany you back home today.” He scratches the back of his head.

Haha, he looks so cute! Aigoo!~ If only I can pinch his cheeks.

“Are you sure that’s what you really want? I mean, I don’t even have to put in effort to pay you back. But, if you really want it, then sure. I’ll meet you at the front gate later after the school ends.”

“Okay!~ See you!” Baro beams at me.

I'm about to walk up the stairs when I realise Gongchan is just frozen beside me. I walk up to him and wave my hand at him.

Gongchan’s POV:

Sorry for being heavy? It kinda hurts? Was ~~~~~ like on top of Baro hyung or what? What were they doing when I was not there? And he’s gonna accompany ~~~~~ back home today? I want to follow also. Wait, why am I thinking so much again? AIGOO!~

“Yoohoo!~ Gongchan-ah! Where are you? Are you in this world yet?” ~~~~~’s voice make me come back to my senses.

“Can I follow you home today too? Please!~”

“Aigoo~ Just do whatever you want. But, now, we have to get to our class quick. You don’t want to get into detention right, councillor?”

“Ouh yah! Let’s go!~”

Seeing ~~~~~ talking comfortably to me was somehow heart-warming. Who would know that the loner in the class is actually this nice? Knowshow to play the guitar. Has a very sweet voice. But the only problem is her changing personality. Yeap, that I must say is VERY WEIRD! Wait. I’m thinking a lot again? What’s wrong with me lately?

Changjo’s POV:

The weather’s so nice today. Perfect for a nap. I'm about to lie down on the grass patch when Ricky’s voice stop me.

“Hey! Isn’t that ~~~~~? But with Gongchan, not Baro.” Ricky pointed.

Ricky is right. I can see ~~~~~ talking to Gongchan. She's not her usual self. Being the quiet, lonely girl, she won’t be brave enough to talk to that strict councillor. What’s with her lately? Without me realising, I'm just staring at her. Her every move. Even though we were so close physically, we have drifted too far apart.

Suddenly, ~~~~~ looks at my way. We exchange glances. Even though, I wanted to smile, I'm too surprised to do so. My mind is blank at that particular moment. She looks away almost instantly. That short while, if only it was a bit longer. How much I long to talk to her again. After all these while, I may be watching her from afar but how I wish I can reduce the gap between us again and be friends like before.

“Changjo-ah, you not going for the next class?” Niel asked.

“Nah, I’m not in the mood to go. Im gonna take a nap.”

As I close my eyes, there are so many things that came to my mind. Of course, ~~~~~ made up a big part of it. What makes me concerned is she befriending B1A4 members. With such popular and outgoing people, ~~~~~ might just be discovered easier. This wonn’t do. After so many years under her cover, I can’t allow her to blow it. There’s too much risk. I have to talk to Baro and Gongchan.

I open my eyes and walk to the rest of Teentop.

“Guys, I think I need your help. We’ve got something to do but we must not let Chief know.”

“Secret mission, huh? I’m in.” L.Joe smirked.
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Just a short update. Thank you for reading! Hope it’s nice! :D

Please do comment and subscribe!~ I appreciate it a lot :))
Anyway, I’m gonna start school in a few days!!! :O