I walked away from the person that I longed to look at, to talk to. Yet now for some reason I am walking away from her. It’s just like what those psychotherapists say; you always want the thing you can’t get. I thought to myself as I thought about the event that just happened.

“I can’t believe this! How could she lie to me! It’s not fair…”

My shouting voice lowered itself. I just couldn’t think anymore and let my eyes closed itself once more, thinking if I was too harsh on her.It probably took a lot of courage to say this to me.

Ji’s POV

TOP’s just sitting a few aisles ahead of me and yet why does it feel like his on the other side of the world from me? Is it really all my fault? I thought that he would be happy about this. He wouldn’t have to suffer because of the scandal that would’ve happened.

“I screwed up big time huh?” I sighed at myself.

“Well I started this I might as well finish it.”

I placed the cut up melon on to the table next to me and lifted myself from the large partially leather coated seat of the first class segment of the plane.

The plane was unstable and the seatbelt light was on. The turbulence was pretty bad this time; you could feel the large Boeing plane bounce up and down. The time it took for me to take a couple of steps seemed to me like a billion miles.The stewardesses were belted up in their own designated seats, as I walked by each row; my heart fastened by a beat each time.

-pabo TOP! It’s not like I said I was even a guy to start off with, everyone just thought of me as a guy, even when I said my registry number and laughed saying, “11? You mean 10 right?”. PABO! I hope I just wanted to make things easier, but nooo!~-

Out of nowhere, there was a humongous shudder in the plane and just like that I was doing a rolly poly down the runway in the plane… backwards!

-Thud!-

“Owwwww~~~ Man they should warn you when things like this happen!” I yelped half in anger half in pain.

“Well you shouldn’t be walking around when there’s a seatbelt sign on either”

I raised my head clockwise, as my fringe slid across my face. There was a huge smirk on T.O.P’s face and he was no longer angry.

“Come on sit down! You’ll be told off soon pabo!”

It was strange how his mood suddenly changed, like he was a whole other person or something. I was slightly hesitant in standing up, somewhat nervous even, but something felt right.

As I sat down he eyed me, every move I made he stared as if he was analyzing something unusual. “What? Stop staring will you! There’s nothing new”

There was a small silence, “Well I was just looking to see if you had anything feminine because your chest is as flat as a chopping board!”

He laughed all of a sudden, it was somewhat embarrassing. The fact that he would actually say that brought a lump in my throat,

“YAH! ITS ONLY BECAUSE I WEAR A BIND OK!!! I AM A B CUP OKAY!!!!! THAT IS NOT SMALL!” before I realized what I was thinking, actually came out of my mouth, a bit like a word vomit.

“Hahahahahahah! What was that? You know, if you’re really that upset, you should have told me earlier. Who knows, maybe I could’ve found out your size on my own~”

His sarcasm, it seemed a little unnatural~ although, it was just purely him. My face went completely red. I could just feel it turning red without even looking, as the heat ran through my face a sudden cold feeling dropped on my left cheek. I turned to my left side, a large hand held onto my left cheek and TOP gazing at it intently.

“Do you… really want to get married? I mean it’s arranged after all. Plus, it still means that I have to quit the group probably.”

His smile was gone now, he looked upset again. I guess hoping that he would be happy all of a sudden was a long shot after all. I just hoped that we could sort this out. But the all I could think was, maybe I really didn’t want to marry him… What if this was just a need to keep my parents happy, no! That can’t be the case, I did rebel to go and join the music industry… But then again, they do run a business in publishing music.

“AAISHH I DON’T KNOW!!!” I messed up my hair and then looked down at the floor and looked back up towards TOP, who sat there patiently for me to give my answer.

“I really do want to! I mean if I didn’t I wouldn’t have even come to this meeting~ Come on! You should know what I’m like by now.” I spoke gently this time.

“How should I know if that really was you. It just as easily could’ve been an act.”

“Listen to me!” by now I was clenching onto his hand which laid on top of his lap, “When I was in the group, from the first time I joined. It was me! Just me! There was no act!”

Drops of tears built up along the edges of my eyes and my vision started to blur amongst the water. I didn’t know if it was out of pity or just pure love that we both shared. TOP’s broad shoulders wrapped itself around me, lending his shoulder to cry on.

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SORRY FOR THE VERY LONG WAIT!!!

but enjoy!

RBP~~

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