His eyes watered and it wasn’t nice at all. It made me feel bad, maybe it wasn’t a good kiss, whatever it was it wasn’t good.

“Hey are you ok?”

“It’s just that, that I didn’t think you’d like me back” He cried full on.

“Man, you made me worry. You should know how long I waited for a chance like this and you start crying and it just aishh!” as I rambled on, I held onto Ji as if he was the very last thing I had in my life. It should stay this way, I didn’t ever want to let go of him. Not now, not ever did I want him to leave my side. Now that I am trapped by his presence, it was impossible to leave its grasp.

The smell of his hair, the softness of his skin and the warmth that he gave me, are all a part of me now. We lay there together on the hard stone floor, wrapped up in each other’s arms, wishing that the morning would never come, even though we knew better.

“Ji, tell me. Since when did you start liking me? Oh, and the next time you want to kiss me, tell me first ok.” I asked him, with a little joke at the end.

“Well, do you remember the day when we shot the Haru Haru MV?”

“Yeah, it was good. And pretty funny as well.” I laughed.

“Well for me it wasn’t, every time you touched that girl. You two looked so perfect. Sure, she was your best friend, but still you guys suited each other and it made me jealous and that’s when I found out that I liked you." He explained, with his cute little pout on his face, I couldn’t help but laugh.

“Well, Anuka is pretty, and she is also very smart. Unlike someone who’s sitting in front of me. But I like the stupid creature that pouts all the time and plays stupid jokes on me and makes me laugh.” I spoke to him, with a blush on my face.

His expressions constantly change according to what I say or how I sit. It was very cute and made me want to treat him like a little kid, but obviously if I did that he would murder me. Since he has an issue with people treating him like a kid, hence the fact that his the leader of the band.

“Don’t go near Anuka again ok? She can be in our MV’s but no kissing her or anything like you did in the night market!” he shouted at me.

“Huh? Oh, umm that. Well you see that was actually SeunGyun trying to hide from the paparazzi that were around and well one thing lead to another and he kissed me out of nowhere and then you came so, well you know. It wasn’t Anuka.” I told him, and turned my head to the other side to face away from him.

“Oh my god, that was SeunGyun? Man is he dead tomorrow, but he really did look like Anuka from the back you know.” He sat there with his finger on his chin, trying to look as if he was thinking about something really intensely.

It was hard to hold back my laughs, he was just so stupid at times. Sometimes, I would even forget why I liked him. The situations that he got into to, the amount of times that he got me in trouble were countless. Somehow, I still found a reason. No, why do we need reasons to love? Is that really how I thought about love? Sure, men don’t have you know, stuff that women have but it’s ok right.

“Don’t be too harsh on her ok? She’s an old friend of mine.”

JiYong didn’t seem happy at my comment and was muttering to himself very cautiously, so that I don’t hear. I could imagine the stuff that he was saying, things like “Why does she get so much attention” or “Man, I really shouldn’t think like this, but she deserves it.” I couldn’t help but laugh at what sort of things he might have been saying to himself.

At some point, we had fallen asleep. Throughout the night, we spoke of how our group has developed over such short period and we were thinking about how we are going to tell everyone about our situation. He came up with such stupid ideas. I’m sure there was one where we announce it on stage but surely, that wasn’t a good plan. My idea was to keep it a secret for as long as possible from the public, but we should tell YG family pretty soon. Since they would probably react really badly if someone in the media found out before them, they would get pretty angry about this kind of stuff. If it was in Japan we would have been fine since they’re open about these kinds of homoual things. I mean come on! They have a whole shoujou (manga or anime type for teenage girls) genre called , just for the hell of the entertainment and no one really cares if you’re gay or not. I just hope that the day when Ji and I are finally ready to tell the public about our relationship. They won’t hurt or damage the reputation of Ji or Big Bang over all. This band and everyone who’s been involved in it has all been a part of me ever since the beginning and I wouldn’t want to see everyone hurt and discouraged just because I couldn’t hold back my feelings.

The next morning we woke up covered by a warm blanket and in bed in each other’s arms. We were both in nightclothes; my mind wondered about what happened last night when we heard a shout outside, what looked like my bedroom at my house.

“Choi SeunGeun! Get your out of bed, breakfast is done!” someone shouted.

“Huh? Mom? When did I?” I whispered to myself, when Ji was just getting up, looking as confused as I was.

“SeunGeun, when did we get here? Did you carry me?” he asked with his hair had gone spastic.

I laughed at how his hair had gone from nice to nasty over a single night. I had never known that when he said his morning hair was bad, he actually meant that it was bad, it’s even worse than my hair and that’s saying something. 

“Hey, get up sleepy head. We need to eat breakfast, my mom isn’t really the calmest person in the world and I think we have some guests anyway.” I told Ji trying to act as if I had everything in control.

We quickly changed into some of my clothes that were still at my house. My clothes were too big for Ji, but that sort of made him look very cute in a way. This made me giggle and made Ji look at me with a confused complexion on his face. All I did was push him out of my room and into the kitchen, where mom was sitting on one of the stools that were around the table and by surprise Anuka was there too.

“Oh my god, when was the last time I saw you SeunGeun? I guess it was around about the time when we shot Haru Haru right?” Anuka smiled at me, with her usual hyperactive face.

It sure hell was nice seeing her, we hadn’t spoken to each other for about 6 months now, she had lost some weight and doesn’t look so bubbly any more. I bet she’s a good dancer now, there were rumors going around that she was getting really good at dancing and beat boxing. I m just hoping that she won’t beat me at it.

“Ooh, did you hear? I m going to join the YG family next week, I m going to be a rapper slash singer and you and SeunGyun are going to be my promos! Can’t wait.” Anuka said with a smile on her face.

I never had thought that she had such a big dream, the last time we spoke she was doing this as part-time and wanted to become something to do with international relations or whatever. Nevertheless, for some reason I dont have a good feeling about this what so ever.