earning trust and breaking trust
Lies
PREVIOUSLY
Maybe I should do this more often, escape from the reality and to stop having strong and stubborn thoughts to society. It's not that bad at all. The locals are nice and of course............Sunbae treats me so well even though he may never end up being mine.......
"YYYUUUMMMMMMYYY!" Hongki squealed as he continously ate his rice and stuffed himself with food which distracted me from my thoughts.
"jeongmal?" Aunni smiled, "My cooking has improved!!!"
"YHHEAHH," Hongki spoke as food was still in his mouth, "I can tashe a lot of sharang in your cooking.......Jin kyong ish in lurve?"
"......HEHHEEE," Aunni laughed sarcastically, "Ani, why would I, just eat you hobo."
Hongki was stuffing himself and he ate messily like a little kid. Kyaa, he reminds me of a toddler. Oh...should I ask about the today?
"Jin kyong aunni, how was it today?" I asked as I put some rice in my mouth and chewed.
"eh? today? Nothing happened really," she answered.
That made me relieved. At least nothing had happened while I was absent. Sighh......tomorrow will be a nice day right? I'm looking forward to see Sunbaeee~
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
YOUR P.O.V
Aishh, why are there so many weirdos blocking my way when I'm trying to get through. I'm suppose to be going to the piano room since Sunbae's waitinggg. Aiiisssshhh.
"excuse me," I said in a small voice since these people looked like Soo jin's friends, "can I please get through?"
"Get through?" a girl with really pretty hair and make up replied in a...........top tone, "according to what you've done to Soo jin, we won't let you go until you can show us a real apology. Offending Soo jin is equal to offending us."
Mwoh? I didn't even offend Soo jin. How can I possibly do that anyway? I thought she was suppose to be the top and crap with all the money and beauty. So...me? A moneyless and ugly thing would offend her? pfft.
"I don't remember doing anything...........," I replied, ".....why would I have to appologize for nothing?"
I watched as that girl stared at me....and so did her friends. I couldn't see anything but anger in their eyes.
"Really now?" she smirked, "Soo jin was being so nice to you dirty creatures yesterday but your friends were so cold and ignorant, didn't anyone tell you that?"
Mwoh? Yesterday something happened? Aunni said nothing happened and that the day was....fine. This morning Tiffany and Jessica said that nothing happened yesterday either. I trust them, they wouldn't lie...
"and," she continued, "You don't know how hurt Soo jin was. We watched her secretly crying alone in the girls restroom afterschool. How can losers like you be so cruel?"
......losers, what.
What is this person talking about. I can't understand her gibberish. The other people didn't make any sense either...I mean, how come when Soo jin's friends and one of us are like......idk, talking to each other...there's always a crowd of people watching. I feel like I'm losing privacy AND if I say something bad most likely they'll curse me.
"uh...hmm," I smiled, "I don't think anything happened yesterdayy, could you be mistaken? I mean.....really, nothing happened at all. I think it's a misunderstanding."
"misunderstanding?" she replied and glared at me with those scary eyes, "Is that what ugly creatures like you say when you're trying to make up excuses? Clearly there was a crowd watching as your friends abused her."
Yes........I am an ugly creature but Jessica and the others did not abuse her. Sometimes in situations like this I can't do anything but I'm not making up excuses....what I've said was true........I really don't know what I'm doing here. I should just leave.
I tried to push passed the people blocking my way until one of Soo jin's friends grabbed my wrist and pulled me back. I felt as someone grabbed my hair and pulled it.
"We said," she continued, "you're not leaving until you can make a proper appology."
Ouchh, my hair, I swear it's going to fall off soon and they're messing it up. I made it so neat and beautiful to see Sunbae but they're ruining itttt.
AND OMG, I don't even have anything to apologize for. My mianhae's are too precious to give to these people...especially when I didn't even do anything wrong. Why must they force me to apologize anyway? Soo jin crying afterschool alone has nothing to do with usssssssss.
If these people make me angry, I swear it's not going to be funny. I may seem normal but when I rage I'm like a freakin disgusting monster with teeth.
"Let go of me," I yelled back, "I won't EVER apologize for doing nothing at all. SO SHIRO, NEVER, NO, ANDWAE."
"You seem tough," the girl said as she eyed me scarily, "But it doesn't mean I'm going to let you go until an apology is made. I'm going to see how long you can stand this."
She started pulling and yanking my hair and even attempted to slap me but of course, I DODGED. I'm in the middle of violent abuse here and no one's helping me. Everyone around was cheering just because I'm being destroyed and I hate how Jessica and the others never walk through this hallway. I felt so powerless each time I was facing these people.....the people with the money and the beauty AKA Soo jin's friends.
Sunbae might even think I'm not going to be coming because I'm sooo late and I swear his wasting his time waiting for me. In situations like this, the only person I worry about is Taemin Sunbae because..........it seems like I'm starting to go crazy over him. The moment when I said the words 'I won't EVER apologize for doing nothing at all. SO SHIRO, NEVER, NO, ANDWAE,' I don't know why Sunbae was in my head. It seems like he is giving me strength.
WHY?
"Taemin," the girl whispered in my ear that made me widen my eyes, "He's someone that you'll never get and I bet you don't even mean a thing to him."
.....The thing that hurt me wasn't only her words but the fact that what she said was probably true.
What would I mean to Sunbae apart from a girl who fails at playing the piano and he's just someone who wants to teach me.......so I wouldn't fail it...
I envy all couples in the world because....they all get to share something so special together....and that is love. For me.....the only love I have is something that can only stay hidden inside me and it's never going to be confessed.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
SOO JIN'S P.O.V <-- this loser doesn't deserve the pinky colour.
So I'm guessing, by now my friends would've already went over to Jin ae and started abusing her. It's not my fault I'm so good at acting. I mean, crying in the girls restroom alone afterschool? pfft, only losers would do that but it also creates a beautiful effect because then everyone would trust me.
It's about time I go show Jin ae how 'nice' I can be so I can earn her freakin trust. Earning her trust is so disgusting I mean, it's equivalent to picking up a piece of paper that's already been dumped in the recycling bin, but it's not my problem that her trust and forgiveness is so useful, which is why I call it a re-used peice of junk from the recycle bin.
Sighhhh, I flicked the strand of hair that was hanging on my face then I turned around and saw......eh? Taemin Oppa through the window? What is he doing alone in that room?
I should talk to him, this seems interesting.
~~~~~~~~~~
TAEMIN'S P.O.V
Wae isn't Jin ae coming. She promised me that she'll be hereeee since she didn't come yesterday. She's taking so long....I have a feeling....
-looks at the date-
It's the start of Septemberrrr already. Wow, it's been almost.....wait it HAS been about four weeks since I've met Jin ae. hehhe. It doesn't seem long, whatever but I've been liking her since...............3 weeks ago. Aish, it feels so long.
Wait..start of a month? She's a girl.......she might me at the toilet....uhm yea.......
start of the month, toilet, girl = .............
hehee......I guess I'm just bored and thinking weird. I took out the lollipop I had in my pocket. It's a cute watermelon shaped lollipop. Its sooo cuteee. hehe.
I've been talking to Jessica so much lately...I think she's really weird.....really weird. She keeps telling me things like:
'You'll never know until you tell her'
'She'll know about it if you tell her and the ending may even be happy.'
What's worse is that she says those things out of the blue and it doesn't make any sense at all. We were suppose to be talking about nerf guns and pewpewpews but she randomly says weird things........strange.
When I ask her what she's talking about she goes:
'How long will it take for you to figure out?"
"Will it ever be too late?"
and I'm like............???
She's expecting me to figure something out when she's giving me no hints? Aishh.
Omo, and Jonghyun's words yesterday, 'Taeminnie, I'm just going to relax and see how long it'll take for you to realise."
PLUS something else that happened yesterdayy....
~FLASHBACK~
I went to visit Jessica at the area she hangs out because I really want to know the reason behind JIn ae's absence. I'm so crazy, I miss her so muchhh. She's driving me insaneee.
"annyeong Jessica," I smiled as she waved back at me, "Can we talk...somewhere private?"
I watched as JIn kyong and the others started staring at me weirdly. What got into them? Whatever at least Jessica and I sat our asses down on the uhm...wooden bench.
"yes Taemin?" she started, staring at me in the eyes.
"eh...." I replied, "Why isn't Jin ae here today?"
"Jin ae?" she answered, "she said she had some business to deal with....I think it's got something to do with the guy living in her house."
"MWOH?" I suddenly exclamied and I saw Jessica jump a little, "guy living in her house?"
"yea..." she nodded smiling, "I heard they're best friends since childhood times. He's quite good looking too ;)"
It's ok...just bestfriends......................but he's good looking? ..............................
"Jessicaaa," I said, "how do you think of my blonde hair?"
"Mwoh?" she stared at me in a confused way then suddenly smiled, "Taemin, could you be jealous when I told you about the fact that Jin ae's bestfriend was good looking?"
.........."No...I'm not jealous, I just want you're opinion," I replied.
"well.......... I think you look better in darker colours, maybe," she smiled.
"oh.........wellllll uhhh, thanx for that," I answered.
"Uhm, sure you don't want to ask anything else?" JEssica asked out of the blue.
"What do you want me to ask?" I asked back.
"Anything about Jin ae's likes and dislikes? About a good way of confessing, things like that?"
"What? Confessing? I'm not planning to do that. She doesn't even like me."
"WHo knows?"
~END OF FLASHBACK~
So many people confuse me. Sighh, I hate it when I"m puzzled. I just want Jin ae to be here NOW.
I heard the door open and I go so excited so I stood up and looked...
"annyeong, Taemin Oppa," Soo jin greeted smiling at me ever so brightly. This girl is dangerous...it's better if I don't go near her.
"....annyeonghaseyo," I replied. I mean, why should I say annyeong when I don't even know this person.
"Oppa, you don't have to be so formal," she smiled, "by the way, who are you waiting for?"
....I want Soo jin to go away now.....I don't ccare if she's pretty or what, she's so dangerous and I think I feel the scary aura.
"I'm.....waiting for," I replied, I can't say Jin ae because....I heard that Jin ae strongly dislikes her anddddd, ahh, just don't say jin ae, "I'm waiting for a hyung."
"eh? really?" she asked innocently, "oh ok...have fun then~"
Like that she left. What was that about? She's so.......omo, really strange but I'm not going to fall for her innocence....it's a mask, a mask. PLUS, Jessica told me the story....and she sounds so..........It's better if I didn't say it.
JIN AEEEEE-AHHH, COME NOW, OMGGGGG.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
YOUR P.O.V
"Jin ae-ah!" Soo jin called in a worried tone and rushed over to me, "are you alright?"
I didn't reply to her because I didn't know how to feel. I can't believe she just told her friend to stop pulling my hair and she told them to stop abusing me with their words.
"Soo jin-ah," the girl who was pulling my hair before called, "These people don't deserve your kindness."
............the word kindness sounded so......it didn't even match up with the name Soo jin.....but was it really her? The one who just helped me? .........what was she planning to do?.......
"Jin ae was the one who got hurt by you," Soo jin said as she glared at that girl, "Please don't hurt her and her friends again....I don't want them to feel sad."
MWOH? She told her friends to not hurt us again? She's saving us from all this abuse we've been taking and holding in lately? What is this? I felt guilty as I looked at her who was innocently smiling at me.....she is pretty and she is.........innocent looking. @(*@((*@ No, she's not, she's got two faces.
She's just acting...........but..she helped me.....she helped us.@(*#&(@
"JIn ae-ah," Soo jin said as she smiled at me, "Come with me to the restroom? I want to fix your hair for you."
She pulled me with her hand holding onto my wrist and took me along with her to the girls restroom. We stood infront of the mirror and there she was, behind me, doing my hair. She took out a comb and gently brushed it with care.
"Jin ae-ah," she suddenly said, "you have really pretty long hair. It's really soft!"
"gomawo," I half heartedly smiled. I felt so.......I felt so uhm...weird. Soo jin is doing my hair and commenting about how pretty and soft it was when I thought she hated me. Did she even hate me?
She got out a curler and who knows where it came from and started curling the ends of my hair. I felt nervous and shaky at first because she might even use the curler to burn my face or something.
"Calm down," she chuckled as she continued with what she was doing, "I won't hurt you."
............I felt relieved when she said the words, 'I won't hurt you' because it felt like I could believe her....she was being so nice and.....it's really a miracle.
"Jin ae-ah," Soo jin continued and her tone was getting serious, "mianhae.....jeongmal mianhae....what I've done to you guys was inhumane...I regret a lot......please give me a chance to change, please forgive me."
........she apologized....and I'm frozen. She said she regretted what she's done and she'll change. She wants my forgiveness, she wants our forgiveness.
I felt her wrap her arms around me, "I'm really....sorry."
............I suddenly felt so guilty and I mentally slapped myself for hating her, I mentally shot myself for being so nasty to her and talking behind her back about pretty much everything....I've never given her any forgiveness and I hated her this much.............I'm so...I didn't put myself in her shoes and examined her point of view on things. @((@&
She wasn't acting all along....she truly wanted our forgiveness and she truly wanted us to be friends again......she wasn't faking...
"Soo jin-ah," I silently said. It's so awkward, "It's ok......I forgive you..."
She suddenly let go of me and stared at me and her eyes looked like it was glowing. She was so happy and even her eyes read it. I Unconsciously smiled at her.
"gomawo JIn ae-ah!" she squealed then pushed me back towards the mirror, "Taemin would like this!"
She started making my hair really pretty and I have to admit she was so good at it......but......even though I've just forgiven her..there's a part of me that doubt.Will she really change?.......aniya, aniya, uhm....just stop thinking those thoughts.
and.....MWOH? TAEMIN SUNBAE? HE'S BEEN WAITING ALONE FOR SUCH A LONG TIME!
"Jin ae-ah," Soo jin smiled, "Do you think Taemin will like your look at the moment?"
......at first I was confused about how she knew I liked Sunbae but then..I remembered it was Eun mi the pabo that told her. I looked at myself in the mirror and......I felt..........I felt............................................................pretty?!
I'M SUPPOSE TO BE UGLY.
"Jin ae-ah, you're really pretty!"
NOO........I'M SUPPOSE TO BE FUGLY.
"uh," I said hesitantly, "....jeongmal? .......KAMSAHAMINDAAA."
Omo, taemin sunbae....how will he feel when he sees me like this? KYAAA, OMO, I'm getting nervous.
"now go ahead," Soo jin said as she pushed me out of the restroom, "FIGHTING."
I smiled at her and I felt so...HAPPY. (@(&@(#(@ until..............................omo, it's the twins with small faces and huge eyes that scare me.
"Jin ae?" Youngmin the weirdo said, "Is it Jin ae?"
"What?" I rolled my eyes at him........come to think of it....Why was he even standing right in front of the girls restroom?
"OMO, IT'S JIN AEEEE," kwangmin squealed, "HYUNG, SHE'S SO PRETTY!"
.......the weirdos just called me pretty. I"m so KYAAA ing excited to meet Sunbae nowwwww.
"gomawo," I smiled as Youngmin and Kwangmin kept observing my face. They make me feel so self conscious. I should take my leave.........
-RUNS-
"YAHH," Youngmin yelled fomr 983742987249 miles away, "JIN AE NOONAAAAA!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
EUN MI'S P.O.V
Jessica...Taemin. What relationship do they have? Jessica seems so protective over him and he walked up to Jessica yesterday and asked to talk to her somewhere private.
The fact that is was 'private' annoyed me so much. If you want to talk to your friend you don't necesarrily have to be that private........
"Yah, Eun mi-ah," Tiffany said as she slapped me on the shoulder back into the real world. I just realised all our friends ditched us and here we are, sitting on the wooden bench like lonely hobos.
"what?" I replied in an annoyed and frustrated tone.
"You're annoyed and frustrated," Tiffany immediately answered, "YOu must be thinking about something that annoys and frustrates you."
........FAR OUT, how does she know? Well ok....I expressed it with the tone I was speaking with.
"Yea i am," I replied in a bored tone.
"You're bored," Tiffany immediately answered, "You're bored because you're frustrated and annoyed because you really want to talk to someone when GOD DAMMIT, THERE'S A PERSON SITTING RIGHT NEXT TO YOU AND YOU CAN TALK TO HER. FAR OUT, (@*&(*@&$( ok."
..........................................................strange.
"Well yea...kinda," I started, "don't you think.....Jessica seems to like...Taemin?"
"mwoh?" Tiffany replied in a surprised tone then straightened herself again,
"well.........kinda.......yea? It was about yesterdayy.the private talk thing. I.......I think they're
secretly dating in the school grounds."
"Omo, TIFFANY!" I squealed, "YOU CAN READ MY MIND, IKR, THAT'S WHAT I WAS THINKING!"
"Well, I didn't read your mind, I was just thinking that too."
"yea whatever."
"But yea, Eun mi-ah, don't you think everything is strange too? It's because JOnghyun Oppa also treats Jessica so well and I had a thought that she liked Jonghyun too..."
"omo, could she be liking both of them but not knowing how to uhm............choose?"
"JEONGMAL? OMO, that does fit into the board with missing puzzle pieces."
"IKR, OMO, AND I THOUGHT JESSICA KNEW JIN AE LIKED HIM THOUGH?!"
"eh? WHAT'S GOING TO HAPPEN THEN?"
"I DON'T KNOW, FIGHT? FIGHT? FIGHT? LIKE, THOSE DRAMAS? LOBEE TRIANGLEEE"
".................OH YEA BUT HOW ABOUT SOO JIN, HE LIKES TAEMIN TOO?!"
"I DON'T KNOW BUT, JONGHYUN OPPA SEEMS TO BE THE UNFAVOURED ONE. I THINK JESSICA CHOOSES TAEMIN OVER
JONGHYUN!"
"OMO, BUT THEN JONGHYUN WILL BE CRYING THE PACIFIC OCEAN WITH JIN AE!!!"
"I KNOW SO WE HAVE TO LEAD THE STORY INTO A HAPPY ENDING. JESSICA HAS TO GO WITH JONGHYUN THEN JIN AE
WITH TAEMIN."
"YES, AND IT DOESN'T MATTER WHO THE HELL SOO JIN IS WITH BECAUSE SHE CAN GO CRY A SMALL POND AND NOBODY CARES."
"YEA BUT WHAT IF TAEMIN AND JESSICA WERE ALREADY TOGETHER?"
"MWOH? THEN WE HAVE TO STOP THEM BEFORE THE FALL DEEPLY IN LOVE."
"(@#&(@&$(&@ JIN AE OUR POOR BABY, @*)@@"
...............I just realised we were screaming in the courtyard. People around us kept looking at me
as if I was attractive and I know I am so whatever. I turned to stare at Tiffany who looked slightly
embarassed but............................we're just scared about the whole relationship thing.
I"m scared Jessica will snatch away Taemin....but I don't have any evidence to say guesses were correct
and...I should be trusting her...........aishh, eotokke?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
JESSICA'S P.O.V
heheeeeee, Jonghyun oppa just held me on the hand and pulled me away to the back of the oval. UWAHH, he touched my handdd and it's sooo warm and @(*#&@(&@(
"Jessicaaa," Jonghyun oppa started as he released my hand and I felt a gush of cold autumn air blow onto my hands that was warm like 0.0000000000000000001 seconds ago.
"mmm?" I asked. OMO, he looked serious. I"m scared but at the same time my heart is beating so fasttttt.
He leaned closer to me and I felt so helpless. I could feel my cheeks go warmmm.
"is there something you might know about Jin ae?" he whispered in my ear then pulled away. AHHH, he ruined my mood of.........ok, I thought he was going to kiss me but he didn't.
Jin ae? Why is he asking me if I knew something about Jin ae. Did he find out something? Something about Jin ae that I might know and hiding it from him.....could it be........GASP, EOTOKEE?
"I...uh..." I replied after clearing my throat, "uhm........HAHAHHAA...haha...haha..........ha.........."
"eh?" jonghyun oppa tilted his head in confusion and he probably thought I was psycho or something, "Jessica, can you answer my question?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
JONGHYUN'S P.O.V
Jessica seems nervous......she probably does know Jin ae's secret. They're close friends and I"m guessing she does know but at the same time I'm hoping she doesn't because.....I'll feel hurt...I'll feel that my trust was betrayed...well, I would've been clueless but my babe Key, told me something yesterday....and come to think of it...It was probably better if I didn't know......BECAUSE I'M DOUBTING JESSICA.
~FLASHBACK~
I was on my iPod playing an intense game of temple run. OMO, it's so fast I"m going to go cross eyed but I have to beat my highscoreeeeee my eyes are bloodshot and I swear they were going to pop out any sencond but, I DONT CARE.... HIGH SCORE!........., AISHH, WHAT IS THIS? I MISSED THAT MAGNET AISHH, FAR OUT, (@*$&(*@&$(*@.
-concentration51, no repeats or hesitation-
wtf? Whatever, omo, just a few thousand more points and I"ll beat my high scoreeee...........
"YEOBOOOOO," screamed the loser that sounds like he's suffocating every single time he speaks. I turned around for a split second when.....
......
............
.........................
WHAT ZE AISH?
OMO, IT WAS HIM, IT WAS THE LOSER, I WAS... FAR OUT, THIS ISN'T THE REALITY, NO NO NO, I LOST, NO, MY HIGH SCORE, MY DREAMS, MY AMBITIONS ARE CRUSHED. NO, I SAID IT ISN'T REALITY. NO NO, NOT REALITY, oh poo.
IS THIS THE REALITY YOU GUYS WANTED?
PFFFT.
"YAH," I screamed as I started attacking the loser with the closest cushion I could find, "MY DREAMS ARE CRUSHED BECAUSE OF YOUUUUUU."
I held the cushion against the loser's face because looking at him would make me rage like aish.
"YEOBOOOO," he screamed and he sounded like he was suffocating. Whatever, he always sounds like that anyway, "STOP, I CAN'T BREATHHHHE."
.......omo, he is suffocating. I threw the cushion back onto the couch and he stood there glaring at me with his firing laser slits. HOHOHO. Well, that's a disadvantage for having a voice that sounds suffocated.
"hyunggggg," our Taeminnie said as he opened the door of our room, "shhhhhh, I was doing my homeworkkkk. AHHH!"
"YAH PUNKS," screamed Onew hyung as he opened the door of his room, "LET ME SHOVE CHICKEN BONES DOWN YOUR THROATS."
"Kibum-ahh, Hyunggg," Minho called as his head popped out after Onew hyung finished screaming, "quiet downnn, you're giving me a headache."
..................................together the all three of them slammed their doors at our faces.
"yeobo," Key started, "how dare you suffocate me when I was going to tell you something."
"you made me die on temple run," I replied calmly, "you know I was just THIS close to beating my highscore when you appeared out of nowhere and started CALLING ME. WE'RE NOT GOING OUT ANYMORE."
"........." Key continued as his face was starting to get.........scary, "YAH, YOU CAN'T DUMP ME."
"IF IT WASN'T FOR YOU," I screamed, "I WOULDN'T HAVE DIED. SO IT'S OVER."
The two doors opened again. Taemin's head popped out of one while MInho and Onew hyung's head popped out the other.
"Yah, jonghyun hyung." Minho said, "talk about your love somewhere else."
"YAH PUNKS," Onew hyung screamed, "no one cares about your love lives."
"yah hyungs," our kind Taeminnie called, "I know you two are deeply in love but please take it somewhere private ok?"
AISHHH...they slammed their doors at our faces again.
Whatever. breathe in, breathe out x 9218741294719247214.
My blood stopped boiling. It's ok guys.
"sooo.........key," I started, "What did you want to tell me?"
"you," he replied as he pointed his index finger directly at my face, "Tell me what you're hiding."
..........mwoh?
"yah," I continued, "you said you were going to tell me something you jellyfish diva. Why are you asking me questions?"
"Well....as you can see, I wanted to know if you were interested in things dealing with Jin ae," he smiled in a......scary way, "I heard she was having difficulties."
Difficulties? What are they? WHAT WHAT WHAT? Well Jin ae likes Taeminnie but that's not a difficulty O_O since.....or is she..lacking confidence just like our Taeminnie? .......wait if Jin kyong told Key about that..............even though they're not close that means Jessica and stuff probably all knew AGES AGOOOOOOO.
"WHAT DIFFICULTIES," I exclaimed as I grabbed onto Key's shirt and pulled it, "TELLL MEEEEEEE."
"YAH," he screamed but then straightened himself and pulled my arms away, "stop, these clothes are expensive. Well, if you really wanna know HOOHOHO tell me your secret. We'll do a trade."
He stared at me and winked, "yeobo, you can tell me anything."
..............What does this weirdo want? I mean, is he trying to fool me or what? Well babe, I'm not easy to fool. You've given me a thought instead.....and I"m not sure if it's a good one....he's making me have doubts.
"HAHAHAAA, no deal," I smiled, "annyeong, talk to me when you've ACTUALLY got something to say."
~END OF FLASHBACK~
sighhh, no one can fool my smart brain even if it was my yeobo who I don't really trust anyway...(^_^)V
"Uhm......." Jessica replied in an awkward tone, "What might I know about Jin ae? What am I suppose to..know...?"
She seems guilty..I mightt be right. She DOES know.I felt slightly angry because she didn't tell me anything and I thought we were close....I didn't know that she hid things from me.
"Does Jin ae like Taemin?" I asked with a smile in case I was scaring her...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
JESSICA'S P.O.V
Eottoke? WHAT DO I SAY? OMO, THIS IS SOOOOO aish-ing ....... (*@$&@$(*&@)(* Let me run away, that's the only option left. I can't tell him anything...if I do.....I won't forgive myself and neither would Jin ae forgive me.......AHHH.
But I don't want Jonghyun oppa to think I'm a liar..he's staring at me so suspiciously as if he knew something. Wait.....didn't Jin ae call me yesterday and started screaming through the line with excitement? She told me that she was with Jonghyun oppa and they were talking about something..thatbrought her into the state of retardedness.....
Could it be that...Jonghyun Oppa already knows something? Like.....by any chance could Jin ae and him be sharing a secret? THey seem closer after yesterday...Jonghyun oppa greeted her this morning even though she was late to school.
shiverssss. Should I say yes or no? AHHH.
eenie meanie. ... dip dip dog crap you are not it......ible gobble black whatever bubble thing, ible gobble out? ...............coca cola tastes good...
ANSWER ISSSSSSS: yes.
NOOO.
"uh...uhm...uhh," I replied still shivering until he placed his hands on my shoulders which made me shiver even more. I think he probably already knows the answer since I keep shaking and hesitating, "...........neh............"
"Jessica," Jonghyun answered in a very very serious tone, "you lied. You told me you didn't know. You liar........"
"No....Jonghyun oppa," I replied, "I didn't well..I'm sorry just that.."he took his hands off my shoulders and turned away, "Jessica, I thought you could trust me."
"I do, I CAN," I yelled, "I just....it was just...mianhada, I didn't mean to...just."
I didn't know why I couldn't explain anything to him. I didn't know why my mouth refused to obey to the message I was thinking in my head. I felt so helpless and...........arghh.
"I trusted that there weren't any secrets between us," he said as he walked away from me, refusing to turn around and reply to my words.
"Jonghyun oppa!" I yelled, "I didn'ttt.....mi..an..hada.."
I wanted to be close to him. I wanted to be more than friends with him. I wanted him to be mine, I wanted him to trust me, to be protective over me....but nothing's turning out how I wanted it. Now, it doesn't seem like he would talk to me ever again. Why are there so many sacrifices just to keep a secret?
As soon as someone lies and are caught....the consequences are too big. I don't want to lie again...mianhae...Jonghyun oppa.
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JONGHYUN'S P.O.V
WHy was I so cold? Why did I act like that? I wanted Jessica to care about me, to love me, to be mine but why am I being like this...?
I didn't hate her but I didn't know why it felt as though I didnt't want to talk to her again. I felt so untrusted and I felt so....hurt. I actually felt hurt. People say the more you love the more you hate.
Could it mean...you get pissed at your lover really easily?
ahhh, eotokke?
~~~~~~~~~~~~
TAEMIN'S P.O.V
"mianhaee!" JIn ae bowed as she came rushing in, "jeongmal mianhaee, I'm so lateeee, mianhaee!"
Omo. I see her, what happened to her hair? OMO, it's really....nice. I'm speechless. I didn't know Jin ae had so many charms.
"Jin ae-ah," I chuckled, "you hair."
"eh?" she replied as she started pulling the ends of her hair and staring at it. She looked embarassed and nervous. I wonder what got into her.
"pabo," I smiled, "it's pretty, not an embarassment."
I watched as pink tints started forming on her cheeks. Is that how girls react when someone calls them pretty? Kyaaa, well she looks sooo cute when she's blushing. I should call her pretty more often.
"here," I continued as I held the watermelon lollipop to her face, "you haven't passed the test yet but here is your reward for.....having...pretty.....hair...that....lookscuteonyou!"
......It's so awkward SAYING THINGS LIKE THATTTT.
I handed her the candy and she smiled, "gomawo."
She looked really shy today......ahhhhh, JIn ae-ah, please see me as someone you can casually talk to and be cool with. I don't want the atmosphere to feel so awkwarddddd~~`
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YOUR P.O.V
Why is he calling me pretty? WHy is he calling me cute? Why is he smiling at me? Why is he even being so nice to me?Does he......see anything in me? Does he....l-l-ll--li--lik--likee me?aniya, aniya.....but I have a slight feeling that....he might? Does he?
How do guys act infront of their lovers? I want to know........I should ask Jonghyun oppa.
'Taemin? He's someone that you'll never get and I bet you don't even mean a thing to him.'
.....how come these words keep echoing in my mind? It just lowers down my hopes...
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SOO JIN'S P.O.V <--eeew
Earning Jin ae's trust is so.....hmm, it's so easy and I feel like I'm getting closer to my goal. Except, for the time being I can't do anything but act nice so I will eventually earn the whole group's trust.
Let's see how they build up their friendship with the Sunbaes. Let's see how close they can get? Would they be close enough that even I can't tear it apart again?
hmmph, what have I got to fear? All I feel is jealousy but I'm not scared. I know if I leave them like this, they'll eventually have doubts for one another. They'll fight against one another. They won't be close.
I don't even have to do anything but watch and enter the set when it's time, and I can make sure...when it is time, I'll be the one with everything and I'll leave them with nothing.
I flicked my hair and examined my own face through the glass reflection.
It's my innocent beauty that can deceive many. What do I fear?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
YOUR P.O.V
It's so late at night but reading these entries put a huge smile on my face.....but the smile also feels pain...
Today, I'm writing the entry for the 27th day.
DAY 27~
Today was a wonderful day with Sunbae. Today I can say I felt every single emotion ever created although most feelings cannot be described with words. I can't tell you how I felt because these feelings cannot be put into words...or can they be written out.
Soo jin made me feel relieved when she said she wouldn't hurt us anymore. I can finally sleep well and enjoy the rest of my school life!
Today Sunbae said I was pretty because of the hair Soo jin had helped me style. I couldn't help but toblush and smile, except why do I feel that he might have something for me? Or does he not....I'm not sure. Do I mean anything to him? I hope I do. Even if I meant a normal friend that he cares for to him..my wish can still be fulfilled. Even though someone said I may mean nothing to Sunbae.....I don't care anymore, I think she's wrong....where did my confidence come from again?
Taemin Sunbae's touch is so electrifying! He had his hands on my wrist while he was teaching me the piano and showing me how to shift hand positions. KYaaaaaaa! He makes me feel like the luckiest person to ever be born! I can't write out every single memory I had but the one I want to remember the most is when he gave me a lollipop because I was pretty!
But.....am I making memories alone? Aphrodite, goddess of love, how would you answer my question?
-Yoo Jin ae-
I sighedd and looked at the watermelon lollipop that sunbae gave me. I stared at the candy for a long time until I decided to put it into a pretty shoe box and seal the momories in it. I don't care if candies rot, I have this candy cane that I haven't eaten for 5 years and I think Hongki gave me but it still looks prefectly normal.
I smiled to myself as I stared at the original copy of 'River flows in you' music sheets that Sunbae gave me, lying in the shoe box with the lollipop on top.
Let's create more memories.
I re-read some parts of older entries..
DAY 1~
I don't know his name but he was so pretty! What is the feeling when you can't stop thinking about someone and your heart keeps thumping so hard against your chest that it hurts? Is it a heart attack?
DAY 13~
Taemin Sunbae and I still have a slightly awkward relationship but I'll get over it soon! He's really
nice to me and I"m glad we're getting along well!
Day 15~
Minho Sunbae and Onew oppa are really nice too! Together we can have long long msn convversations. I
wish I could do that with Sunbae too!
DAY 18~
Sunbae started teaching me piano! He took out his own copy of music sheets and gave them to me! I photocopied it and kept the original in my memory box! This will help me seal all our memories that will soon be created with the PI-A-NO!
All these entries are full of hope and come to think about it....Sunbae has made me insane. Is this the love sickness?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
hehehee, LONG CHAPTER HERE! Honestly I find it too dragged and stuff BUTTTTTTTT, I guess it's alright.
This chapter is sweet but when SOo jin appears the atmosphere is freakin ruined.... hehe....@(&(&@$($@*&)@ RAGEEE. Soooo yeaa, I might have some gramatical errors because this chapter is sooo long and I couldn't be bothered reading it through thoroughly. hohoho.
SOOO, whats the complication? Soo jin has backed out for the time being so what's going to happen next? More Taemin and you memories? heheheheeess.
I will include more Taemin parts and I have to start writing about you and Onew's relationship or else calling you guys close would be weird...
soo many P.O.Vs T^T chappies will get longer and longer....if you dont mind ;D
SOOOOO, SUBSRICE AND THE COMMENT BUTTON. I really want to know your opinions about the story ^^
THEY ARE FOREVER LOVED <3
@Shiningstarss, key is a weird babe.
@Nikkilovesshinee , thankyou for loving meeee! Thanks for calling me funny because I don't think I"m funny at all -tear- but I will try add some humour in the story...thats only if it matches the theme..hoho. I STILL HAVE THE JOJO TWINS AND LEE HONGKI TO CREATE FUNNY ATMOSPHERES~ ;D.
ok gaiz, keep reading~ I'll keep writing! ^^
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