17 > i tried to be fine

Bratty Kitten

a/n : hi! c: before you get confused. this is a chapter following Yibo, before he got home and saw Seungyounnie.

flashback style

so this is Yibo's special chapter~~ this will explain alot!

o v o let's goooo-

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One step at a time, heel to toe, a tedious process. Though he wanted to linger in the hallways, to flutter there as if he had broken his wings. He wanted to stay so he wouldn't have to return. Yibo wanted to go missing, but feared he would miss this feeling. Although it hurt, he liked the warm blanket of comfort he got. Because it was okay after all. He his heel, peeking around the corner, the bathroom in sight. Bathroom, that's where he was going. Now he remembered, he wasn't to run away, but simply check up on himself. Slipping inside the room. Yibo stared hard into the mirror. Who was this reflection of? A quiet blonde haired boy with ears and a tail, it was him, but he didn't recognize himself, he wasn't smiling anymore. Instead Yibo was in pain, holding back tears, holding back the urge to scream at the top of his lungs. So he stared a bit more, his body tensed, and he closed the door easily. In this bathroom, with the door locked, he had a world of protection around him. No one could get in, and he himself couldn't get out. Good, good. He reached his hand up, running his thin fingers through his hair, it was smooth, but his scalp hurt. He figured that was why he liked it so much, that's why he was always tugging at it, whether it be because he wanted to touch him or to demand something. He looked down at his hands, at his arms. His skin was pale, and when he was embarrassed it tinted a soft pink. He figured that was why he liked it so much, that's why he was always marking it, why he was always hurting him, why he was always touching him even if he was tired of it. but because he said it was fine, so it was fine.

Yibo reached down for the corner of his shirt, it was dark grey and it was soft against his skin. He liked the comfort on his aching body. Aching... He glanced at his reflection suspiciously, would he want to see this? But he didn't care much, and pulled his shirt up three quarters of the way up. His soft skin had already bloomed with several bruises, most of them on his hips, though that didn't mean he wasn't hit other places. It hurt him, it hurt his pride.

but because he said it was fine, so it was fine.

The cat set his shirt back down, wiping his sweaty palms on his jeans. He hadn't noticed his legs began to shake, at the thought of having to return to his room. He didn't know what else to do, as he would worry if Yibo suddenly disappeared in the bathroom. So he forced himself, to open the door, turn off the lights and walk out. Outside, in the hallway was nice. So he walked slowly again, staring down at his toes, at his socks that rubbed against the hardwood floor. If Yibo was to fall right now, he wondered how much pain he would be in, and if it compared to him. Of course, this was the aftermath of his choices. That he was stuck in the middle of this whirlpool that was him.

He walked into the bedroom, his eyes fluttering to the male sitting on the edge of it. His body was leaning forward, his hands folding between his legs. His hair was still a bit messed up, his body neither tense nor relaxed. Yibo watched curiously, his own eyes lowering to look at his facial expression. He sat there without mind, his eyes blinking as he thought. Of what? His sins? The thought made Yibo giggle, and he quickly covered his mouth, his eyes averting to the ground in fear. He had nothing to laugh about, because he was the one who was being sinned against.

"Yibo, come here." He leaned backwards, his head rising to look the blonde cat in the eyes. It wasn't a piercing gaze, but rather something that looked like it was sorry. But Yibo went with his words, and walked over to him. When he opened his arms, he understood and sunk down into his lap. He sat down, his face buried in the strangely comforting smell that was him. "I know I hurt you." His voice was a low whisper, as his arms softly wrapped around his waist. They were always like that, they were always too blind to realize. Yibo only nodded, his eyes closing as he nuzzled further into the others chest. He was warm, he was everything he needed. "We both know I hurt you, and that I won't ever stop hurting you. But you know, I hurt you because you hesitate too much. You need to trust me."

"I trust you." Yibo didn't hesitate this time, and sat up in his lap, pressing a gentle kiss to the others jaw line. And he did, he foolishly trusted this man. Band-aids don't fix bullet holes. He didn't care he would hurt him, because it meant he cared about him. Wasn't that right? 

"It's fine Yibo, we're fine."

but because he said it was fine, so it was fine.

"I trust you Sungjoo, I trust you."

-

Yibo was now outside, he told Sungjoo it was okay that he was walking home alone. Sungjoo knew the two brothers didn't quite like him, and he knew Yibo wouldn't want to start anything. So he left after a soft kiss, the only thing that convince him he actually loved him. So now Yibo walked out of the building, stepping out into the street and realizing the heavy rain fall. If only he brought an umbrella, he could take him time without worrying. But was his life worry free? No, not even close. So much was going on. His eyes flickered around the dark city, no cars at this hour, and few people on the street. So he kept walking, taking his time in the cold weather. His shirt was soaked, his hair soaked, his pants soaked, his shoes almost filling themselves with water. Yibo stopped for a second, relishing in the disgusting feeling of wet clothes. But then he remembered, that he felt like this even in the safety of Sungjoo's home. He felt like this when he was ignored, he felt like this when he was hit, when he was called names, when he had to apologize for something he did wrong. He felt like this when he was with him, when he was away from him.

Yibo's eyes pricked with tears, and he squeezed them shut. , . His life was a huge confusing world of mistakes. He crouched down where he was, crying to himself. Yibo wiped at his eyes the best he could, but he couldn't stop crying. His chest felt like it broke from all the heaving, and his body shook at the very thought of sitting alone in the rain. Why was he alone? Why was he alone when he was with somebody? Yibo ended up sitting down on the concrete, sitting down in a puddle and crying his broken little heart out. He wished he had never been picked up by Seungyoun that day, because then he wouldn't have to hurt so much, and then he wouldn't have to cause so much pain. Why? Why was it him? Why was he so unlucky? Why couldn't he just be loved and fall in love? He knew too little about the world, and was being thrown into a fiery death without noticing. What is this all for?

Yibo didn't know.

The only thing he knew, was he hated everything. He hated how right it felt to be with Sungjoo, and how sinful they were and how right it felt to be with Seungyoun and how pure they would be. But Yibo messed that up too, he messed up. Yibo was messed up.

Yibo knew.

-

a/n: double authors note /)(\

omg yibo bby ;;;; 

i'm so sorry this kind of just happened so easily like it just flowed and worked out perfectly.

o v o hope you don't mind the sudden angst bomb < 3

i think it's quite nice, and it will add to drama and relationship and it explains last chapter very nicely ~

comment?

any questions? i will answer a few that won't spoil! ^ ^

That's why he's crying !! 

 

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Comments

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kellyb2st
#1
Chapter 25: So cute
Zizzalabimm #2
Good story
Yui000
#3
Chapter 1: Cute
unique_unicorn_12397
#4
Chapter 25: the fluffy feelings are greatly appreciated this morning.
LaMimi
#5
Nice fic ^_^
SongRachel
#6
Chapter 5: It reminds me about my mom T.T
SongRachel
#7
Chapter 3: Aakkkk yibo !!!

So damn cute !!!!
SongRachel
#8
Chapter 2: This is soooo damn cute bobobobo yibo.!!!!!
SungrinBF
#9
Chapter 25: *sobs with ugly whale sounds* This first catboy fic of mine is Finished! Huhuhu T.T I'm so proud yet sad that my Cute Yibo dose of feels has ended T.T But...ahh...I need to stop this tears...

I am looking forward to the sequel though~ Is Baby Yibo present? /desperately pleades/