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The Review: 

1. Punctuation, Spelling and Grammar (16/20)
- First of all, the ellipsis consists of three dots and not two. I do know that you are trying to emphasize the pauses, but putting too much is a little bit vexing to read as sometimes the way you put the ellipsis distracts the readers on what you're actually trying to say. And I have noticed the ellipsis too much in your story; I would suggest to edit it as it would look better. 

As well as that, there were also paragraphs and sentences that had overused commas when there wasn't really a need to, and I have spotted (once again) verbs that weren't in the same tense. Again, always remind yourself that when you use the past tense of the verb, use it for the next one and the next. Overall, there were only some spelling errors but you should focus more in your punctuation and grammar (especially ellipsis). I have corrected some paragraphs below.

*Italicized is what you had written, and the bold text is my correction

Amidst all that, my eyes landed on a medium-sized container displayed at the corner of my desk. It was used to fill food that was prepared by him. By merely looking at it, my insides..trembled.

Hastily, I rose from the seat and tip-toed in front of the cupboard, reaching for the key the I had put on top. A breath of relief escaped my mouth soon after I hear the clattering sounds of the key. Swifly, I used it to unlock the lowermost drawer of my study table. My sight was glued on the piled of medications stored in it. I didn't hesitate for long till I shoved it inside my bag before making my way to the door. 

Amidst all that, my eyes landed on a medium-sized container displayed the corner of my desk. It was used to be filled with food that was prepared by him. By merely looking at it, my insides...trembled.

Hastily, I rose up from my seat and tip-toed in front of the cupboard, and reached for the key that I had put on top. A breath of relief escaped my mouth as soon as I heard the clattered sound of the key as it lightly tapped the cupboard's roof. Swiftly, I used it to unlock the lowermost drawer of my study table. My sight was glued on the piles of medications stored in it. I didn't hesitate for long until I shoved it inside my bag before I made my way to the door.

With one step ahead at the entrance of the Auditorium hall, my heart start palpitating. The reverberating sound within the spacious hall made me wince. Cold air filled my lungs as I spot the announcement board at the center, surrounded by familiar faces. 

With just one step before the entrance of the Auditorium hall, my heart started to palpitate. I winced at the reverberating sound within the spacious hall. Cold air filled my lungs as I spotted the announcement board at the center  surrounded by familiar faces.

I don't give a damn about what others might viewed me as. They could hate me for turning into a solitude and curse me for being indifferent, mannerless, senseless. But above all, there was just one..thing I would never ever wanted to hear it from them;

They don't ask me to forget about Kai.

I don't give a damn about what others might've viewed me as. They could hate me for living a life of solitude and curse me for being indifferent, ill-mannered, or senseless. But above all, there was just one thing I never wanted to hear from them:

That they won't ask me to forget about Kai. 

"Kai you stupid! If I late for exams, you are so going to pay for it! You-You-You...evil brother!"

Kai heaved deeply. He barely got any sleep. Last night, he accompanied her throughout the night, preparing night snack for her as a little effort to ease her stress. But this morning, her demeanour changed. Nah..he was used to get a