Taeyeon massaged her throbbing head with her left hand while her right hand blindly searched for her migraine pills on the desk drawer. Drinking on a Sunday night was never a good idea. She shook her head, popping a pill to . That was one hell of a weekend. From Yoona and Yuri’s wedding to seeing Jessica again, only the girl doesn’t know her anymore. Then there was the little girl and the blonde girl that could have possibly been Jessica's family. There was a moment of shock and hurt. She thought it would be okay, that seeing Jessica happy would make her happy too. But those were all wishful thinking as she finds herself drowning in alcohol that night. It will never be okay. Nothing could ever make it okay.

She willed herself to stop thinking about Jessica anymore. There are a lot of meetings scheduled for the day, she can’t go moping around. Her life is already miserable as it is. She glanced at her wrist watch; she still have thirty minutes to spare. And deciding that a short nap would mend her throbbing head; she closed her eyes.

“Taengoo~ your migraines are becoming more frequent. We need to get that checked.” Jessica laid Taeyeon’s head in her lap before massaging it.

 “Sooyeon, I’m okay. It’s just normal.” Taeyeon said, hands reaching up to turn Jessica’s frown into a smile but failed.

“Look, it’s nothing serious, okay? I swear.” Taeyeon sat up on the bed and faced Jessica while she cupped her girlfriend’s cheeks.

“I’m sorry. I’m just.. worried.” Jessica whispered with head hung low.

 “I know. I’m sorry for worrying you.” Taeyeon smiled and tilted Jessica’s head back up so she would face her again.

“I’ll take better care of myself, okay? And the same goes to you. You know I don’t really like the idea of you taking overtimes.” Taeyeon pursed her lips as she looked deep into Jessica’s eyes, hoping to convey her distaste to her girlfriend.

Jessica smiled weakly before patting Taeyeon’s thigh.

“I just needed some extra cash to buy something.”

“Sooyeon, I could buy you whatever you want. You don’t need to work your off.”

“Taengoo.. we’ve talked about this before. I’m not using your money.”

“It’s the least I could do for my girlfriend.”

Jessica shook her head and smiled at her girlfriend.

“What did you want to buy anyway?”

Jessica beamed at the mention of the gift and she reached towards the bedside drawer.

“This,” she said, holding out a gift-wrapped box towards Taeyeon.

Taeyeon eyed the box for a moment before arching a brow at Jessica.

“Open it.” Jessica said, putting the box in Taeyeon’s hands.

Taeyeon did as told and a black velvet box came in view. She opened the rectangular box and was greeted by a brown leather strapped wrist watch with gold case and bezel; its hands were gold too while the dial was white. It was the watch Taeyeon had been eyeing one time they were at the mall. She was supposed to buy it the following week but she forgot about it as piles and piles of school work occupied her mind. She smiled widely at Jessica before hugging the girl.

“Thank you..” She whispered, kissing Jessica’s cheek.

“Come on, let’s put it on.” Jessica said, taking the wrist watch from Taeyeon as her other hand took hold of Taeyeon’s left wrist.

“Happy birthday, Taengoo~” Jessica said, bringing her eyes back up to meet Taeyeon’s gaze.

“I.. I thought you.. forgot.” Taeyeon admitted shyly, making Jessica chuckle.

“Seriously? We’ve been together for three years and you still think I’d forget?”

Taeyeon just smiled sheepishly at her girlfriend.

“Now, for your other gift.” Jessica says, smirking seductively at Taeyeon before straddling the girl’s lap and capturing her lips, making time stop yet again.

Taeyeon’s senses woke up to the feeling of fingers on her temple. Her eyes stayed close, not wanting the person to stop what they were doing.

“Sooyeon-ah~” She unconsciously cooed, making the person stop what they were doing.

“You’re sleep talking again. Aigoo, what would I do with you.” She felt the person’s palms pressed lightly against her cheeks. She smiled at the familiar sensation.

“Hey, Tae-tae.. let’s go. The meeting’s starting soon.” The person said, shaking her cheeks lightly.

She then opened her eyes to see her ex-fiancé, back leaned against her desk, looking at her. She smiled at him before standing up from her chair.

**

By the time the meeting was over, another set of migraine strikes and Taeyeon finds herself leaning against Wooyoung’s arm.

“You have to stop drowning yourself in alcohol, Tae-tae.” Wooyoung commented as he walked them back to Taeyeon’s office.

Taeyeon didn’t bother to answer and waited for Wooyoung to open the door to her office. As soon as he did, Taeyeon walked briskly to her chair, popping another pill in . Wooyoung watched her as she massaged her temple; the bags under her eyes showing, her lips dry and pale like always.

“You didn’t eat again.” Wooyoung stated, taking a seat across Taeyeon on the desk. The girl merely shrugged at his comment.

“What is it this time? The last time I saw you like this was when your father passed away.”

Taeyeon instantly glared at Wooyoung while he brought his hands up defensively.

“That was almost four years ago. Haven’t you moved on yet?” He asked as soon as Taeyeon turned to look away from his accusing gaze.

“It’s not that easy. You know how much I love him.” Taeyeon said weakly as tears started building up on her eyes.

“Sorry, Tae-tae..” Wooyoung said, apologetic eyes lingering on his ex-fiancée. His college buddy. His partner.

A shrug of the shoulder was Taeyeon’s answer again before silence took over; thoughts wandering around.

“..I saw Jessica.” Taeyeon whispered, breaking the silence, voice croaking.

Wooyoung had to lean closer towards the girl to make sure he heard it right.

“You what?” He asked to confirm if he heard it right.

“I saw Jessica. Yesterday at the supermarket. She looked so beautiful, almost glowing..” Taeyeon unconsciously smiled as her mind replayed yesterday’s scenarios.

“And her daughter is really cute..” Taeyeon trailed off, smile faltering at the thought of Jessica already having a family.

“Did you just say daughter?”

Taeyeon nodded her head, avoiding Wooyoung’s sympathetic gaze.

“Oh, Tae-tae..”

“It’s fine. She looks happy. I’m happy for her.”

“Are you really?"

Taeyeon didn’t answer.

"So, what did she say when she saw you?” Wooyoung asked instead, changing the topic.

“She doesn’t recognize me.”

“What?! How come?”

“Amnesia.”

Wooyoung quirked his brow at the answer.

“For real?” He said after a while.

“That’s what she said.”

“And you believe her?”

“Her eyes looked like she’s lost. I don’t know but it sounds legit. I mean, I know when Sooyeon lies.”

“So you’re saying.. she really has amnesia?”

Taeyeon nodded.

“Amnesias only happen in movies, Tae-tae.”

**

Taeyeon entered the diner as soon as Sooyoung’s head caught her sight. She smiled at her friends before sitting beside Sunny. The four other girls, however, didn’t return the smile.

“You were out drinking last night. Again.” Sooyoung was the first one to speak up.

Taeyeon rolled her eyes before commenting, “You’re not my mother, Soo.”

“Okay, just drop the topic before this goes out of hand. Again.” Sunny said, glaring at Taeyeon.

“And we still need to talk about that little habit of yours.” She added before laying a brown envelope on the table.

Everyone kept silent and averted their gazes on the brown envelope laying on the table.

“I don’t even know why it took us four years to do this. Seriously, did we not care enough for Jessica that we just let her disappear like that?”

The rest of the girls looked at Sunny questioningly.

“Jessica Jung, free-lance model. Pretty famous in California, but not in Asia yet..” She added, looking at the girls before bringing her eyes back to the paper she took out from the envelope.

“She lives with Kim Hyoyeon and a child named Seohyun.” Sunny finished.

“That’s it? What about the accident? Is she married? How about Soojung and their parents?” Taeyeon frantically asked.

“That’s it. Apparently, she likes keeping her life private.” Sunny answered, laying the paper on the table which Sooyoung took almost immediately.

“Wow, Sica looks a hundred times more beautiful.” Sooyoung commented.

“Wait, accident?” Yoona said, eyeing Taeyeon with curious eyes.

“We saw her yesterday at the supermarket. She claims to have amnesia from some accident four years ago.” Sunny answered for Taeyeon, shrugging her shoulders.

“So, she doesn’t remember Taeng?”

“Nope. All of us, actually.”

“Seriously?!” Sooyoung blurted out in disbelief.

“There’s no way she’ll forget me!” She added, shaking her head.

“She just did, Sooyoungie~” Sunny answered nonchalantly.

“Can we see her then? Where does she live?” Yuri asked.

“No idea. Jessica seems to be discreet about her private life.”

Taeyeon kept silent the whole time while her friends planned on how to meet Jessica.

“You’re a photographer, she’s a model. Why not invite her for a photoshoot?” Taeyeon suggested, making all the girls turn their attentions towards her.

Sunny pouts at the suggestion. “But it’s not like I can just hire her for a fun shoot, you know. She’s a professional model.”

Yuri nods her head before an idea came to her mind.

“Why not hire her as a new image model of your company, Taeng? I’m sure Wooyoung wouldn’t mind.” She said, nodding her head.

“Well..” Taeyeon trailed off, considering Yuri’s suggestion.

“..well it’s a good idea! Why not do that? Soo would be the makeup artist while I and Yoong can be the shoot directors. How’s that for a plan?” Yuri beamed, smiling widely at her bestfriend.

The rest of the girls nodded their heads except for Taeyeon.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea though. First, you are a chef and Yoona is a preschool teacher so none of you is actually qualified to be hired as 'director'. Second, Sooyoung is not a makeup artist, and third she might not agree if she'll know it's my company.” She said as uncertainty crept in.

"She'll never know! She has amnesia, remember? And you're the owner of the company so you can hire us. And Soo is actually good!" Yuri chirped.

"Still not a good idea, really." Taeyeon commented.

“What?! That was the best idea ever!” Sooyoung chirped shaking Yuri’s hand as if they were two businesswomen closing a deal.

Yoona laughed at them while Taeyeon rolled her eyes.

“But the million-dollar question is..” Sunny said, casting a glance towards Taeyeon.

“..is Taeng's heart ready to be broken again? Remember, there’s a big chance that Sica might be married.” She added, emphasizing the last word.

“You didn’t have to rub it in.” Taeyeon retorted, rolling her eyes at the aegyo queen.

“At least we get to see our friend again.. right? That is what’s important.. right?” Sooyoung eyed the girls expectantly and smiled when they nod.

**

The days after Jessica’s reappearance had been hard for Taeyeon. Not only was she missing the girl a lot more but the thought of Jessica being married won’t ever leave her at peace. She was too close yet too far.

And today was the hardest day of all as she looked at Jessica's little family in the corner. It was the kind of family she had always dreamt of having with Jessica. They were actually on their way to their happy ever after before. But things didn't go as planned.

Her eyes landed on the little girl on a swivel chair. For some odd reasons, she finds herself staring at the little bundle of joy as she colored her coloring book away, tuning the world out. It was something that Taeyeon would like to do at the moment; tune the world out and get lost in the world of pink unicorns and rainbows.

However, a tap on the shoulder snapped her out of the trance.

"Why are you smiling like a e there? Seriously, you look like a creep." Sooyoung commented as she sat down beside Taeyeon on the company's conference hall that now serves as the makeshift photo studio.

"How old do you think is she?"

"Who? The little girl? 3? 4? No idea. But have you heard her talk? She's like, older than me! I swear Taeng that child is something! She even swatted the fries from my hands! She said that I would die early because of fast foods!" Sooyoung dramatically flailed her hands in the air.

Taeyeon snorted a laugh as she answered, "She was right though."

"No, but seriously. When I was her age I was eating everything there is to eat! But she refused all the food here. She just wanted her precious sweet potatoes." Sooyoung pointed at the little girl as she happily munched on her sweet potato.

"See? I wonder how Jessica managed to raise her. She's so uptight." She added.

"Must be the wife?" Taeyeon pointed her lips towards Hyoyeon.

"The blonde? No way! She eats everything she sees! I even had to hide my burgers because she was eyeing them!"

“Yah! You can’t do that!” Taeyeon faced Sooyoung and flicked a finger at the taller girl’s forehead.

“Yaaaah! I’m taller than you!” Sooyoung protested, flicking Taeyeon’s forehead in response.

The bickering went on for a couple of seconds before they settled down from their frenzy. Silence then enveloped them as they let their gaze follow Jessica who was making her way in front of the camera which Sunny professionally set-up on the tripod.

“She really doesn’t remember all of us. Yoong was about to tear up when Sica asked her who she was.” Sooyoung muttered dejectedly.

“Do you think it’s for the best?”

Sooyoung tuned to look at Taeyeon with furrowed brows.

“..the accident. Her having amnesia. Forgetting everything about the past and moving on with her life. Do you think it was for the best?

“I don’t know.”

“I want to be selfish and wish that her memories won’t ever come back. That way she could forget how terrible of a person I am. But I can’t do that Soo. As much as I want her to forget about the bad memories, I do want her to remember me too. Even if she’d despise me when that day comes.”

“But Sica doesn’t hold grudges. You know that. We all know that.”

“But she should. I’m a terrible person.”

“Don’t beat yourself up, midget. It had been 4 years.” Sooyoung said, patting Taeyeon’s thigh twice before returning her gaze back to Jessica.

**

After her little talk with Sooyoung and gawking at Jessica like a lovesick puppy, Taeyeon decided to walk back to her office; hoping to get some nap. She was about to turn the corner to her office when Jessica’s daughter caught her sight. The little girl was standing in front of a vending machine with furrowed brows. Unconciously, Taeyeon took a step towards the little girl until she was standing beside the pouting girl.

“Hey,” She greeted, remembering how the girl had spoken in English.

The little girl tilted her head back and stared at Taeyeon for a while before turning her gaze back to the machine.

“Is there something wrong?” Taeyeon asked.

The girl pointed her index finger towards the machine before saying, “How dat work? Where the man giving candies? Does he hide?”

Taeyeon stifled a chuckle before answering, “There’s no man. It’s a machine. You know what a machine is?”

The little girl tapped her chin with her index finger, contemplating for a moment before she shook her head no.

Taeyeon smiled before taking a coin from her blazer’s pocket. She crouched down to the little girl’s level and gave her the coin.

Seohyun furrowed her brow to the odd woman before a squeal escaped from her lips as the woman scooped her in her arms.

“Go on,” Taeyeon urged as she tapped the coin slot of the vending machine. Seohyun looked at her for a moment before she hesitantly put the coin inside.

“Now, what do you want?” Taeyeon asked. Without uttering a word, Seohyun pointed at the packet of gummy worms.

Taeyeon’s eyes lit up and another smile was plastered on her face.

“Gummy worms. My favorite.” She said before pressing the button. After a few seconds, the machine dispensed the packet of gummy worms. Seohyun’s eyes lit up instantly and she wiggled to get out of Taeyeon’s arms.

“Alright, alright.” Taeyeon said while laughing as she put Seohyun down on her feet.

“Happy now?” She asked and Seohyun nodded.

“Thank you, unnie!” Seohyun replied in Korean with a bow before leaving Taeyeon to run back to the conference hall.

Taeyeon was left dumbfounded. All this time she struggled to converse in English, turns out the little girl speaks Korean. She shook her head with a smile before strolling off to her office, oblivious to the pair of black orbs that had been watching the interaction from afar. The owner of the eyes smiled before strolling off to the conference hall, following her Hyunnie.

**

“And that’s a wrap!” Sunny beamed as she bowed her thank you to the people inside the conference hall.

“Oh thank goodness I’m starving! Taeng, where are we eating?” Sooyoung asked, rubbing her stomach.

“Sorry guys, I’m staying behind. Got to finish a presentation for tomorrow’s investors.” Taeyeon answered.

Sunny rolled her eyes before turning her attention to Yoona and Yuri.

“Chef, are you cooking something for us tonight?” She asked, wriggling her brows at Yuri.

“Too tired, Soonkyu.” Yuri answered, waving a hand at Sunny but the aegyo queen turned her head towards Jessica that was now engaged in a conversation with her daughter and their blonde companion.

“Sica!” Sunny called, making all heads turn to her.

“Y-yes, Sunny-shi?” Jessica stood up as the group approached her, leaving Taeyeon behind.

“Yuri is cooking for us tonight. You guys want to come?” Sunny turned to look at Yuri for a brief moment before her gaze returned to Jessica as she eyed the girl expectantly.

“Wha—“ Yuri was cut off by an elbow in her ribs.

“Aw, what was that for?!” She hissed at Yoona who looked straight in Jessica’s eyes.

“Sica, it would really be nice to have you guys over for dinner. Since Taeng isn’t going, that means more space for you guys.” Yoona stated with a smile as she too, looked at Jessica expectantly.

“Err,” Jessica turned to Hyoyeon with questioning eyes. The blonde smiled and nodded at her.

“Fine,” she answered with an inaudible sigh.

“Where are we going, anyway?” She asked and the group beamed.

“Mr. Choi’s bar!” They all chimed.

An uneasy feeling built inside Jessica. Should have said no. And as if it wasn’t awkward enough to revisit their favorite hangout in high school; a voice spoke, “You guys, let’s go. It’s getting late and I’m getting hungry.”

They all turned to face Taeyeon as she walked straight to the door, avoiding everyone’s gaze.

“Pfft. Staying behind my .” Sooyoung scoffed.

**

Nostalgia crept in as soon as they all settled on their usual spot and Jessica finds herself fidgeting on her seat. Hyoyeon squeezed her hand as she looked at her with concerned eyes. Jessica smiled and nodded at Hyoyeon before her attention was brought back to the group.

“So, Yuri-shi works here?” Jessica asked to no one in particular.

“No, Sooyoung’s father owns this bar. He lets Yuri cook whenever we’re all here.” Yoona answered proudly as her eyes landed on the closed door to the kitchen.

Jessica nodded as formed to an ‘o’.

“So, what was Jess like in high school?” Hyoyeon asked, making all heads turn towards her before looking at Taeyeon. The girl sat unmoving in her chair while she stared at her glass of beer.

“Well,” Sooyoung shifted on her seat as she propped her chin in the palm of her hands, elbows against the surface of the table.

“She looked lazy but scary at the same time. Especially when she shot you those icy glares!” Sooyoung exclaimed happily as her thought wandered to the past.

“Yeah! And she doesn’t really like talking. She only had us as her friends.” Yoona added, earning Sooyoung and Sunny’s nod of approval.

“And she gets easily irritated! I don’t even know how Taeng hand—“ Sunny clamped shut as she caught herself.

Sooyoung rolled her eyes before catching saying, “Yeah, Sica was like that. But we would never have her any other way.”

Sooyoung locked gazed with Jessica before the latter looked off to her side.

“I—I’m sorry that I forgot about you guys.” Jessica said, eyes looking at everything but the girls around the table.

“Pabo. It’s not like you intended to forget about us, right? It was all because of the accident. So don’t apologize.” Sooyoung said with a warm smile, making Jessica feel guiltier.

“She’s right.” Hyoyeon joined in, eyeing Jessica with knowing looks.

The table fell silent for a moment before Hyoyeon broke the silence again.

“So, any former boyfriends—err, girlfriends from high school?” Hyoyeon asked which earned her a kick on the shin. She suppressed a squeal and rubbed her shin instead.

The group looked uneasy with Yoona’s eyes darting from Taeyeon and Jessica every now and then. Taeyeon, on the other hand, felt her heart pound against her chest.

“Oh, come on. It’s not like she had been in a relationship with one of you, right?” Hyoyeon pressed when nobody seemed to be answering. Sooyoung, Yoona and Sunny’s eyes all went wide for a moment.

“Err.. I don’t think it’s really necessary to talk about that. I mean you both are—“ Sunny was cut off when Yuri arrived in their table with a tray of food. Taeyeon let out the breath she was holding.

“We both are what?” Hyoyeon asked, brows furrowed at Sunny.

“Continue with the chitchat later, girls. It’s time to eat!” Yuri grinned as she sat beside Yoona.

“Tired?” Yoona asked when Yuri rested her head in her wife’s shoulder. The tanned girl nods her head cutely, earning a kiss on the forehead from Yoona.

“Now I’m energized!” Yuri sat up with a dorky grin plastered on her face before stealing a kiss from her wife. Taeyeon and Jessica unknowingly looked away from the endearing sight.

“Yah! You two! There’s a child here!” Sooyoung said, pointing at Seohyun who was so lost in the world of pink unicorns and rainbows again as she silently colored her coloring book.

The group devoured the food Yuri had prepared like it was the last food on Earth. Taeyeon can’t help but steal glances at Jessica every now and then, only to frown every time she catches Hyoyeon taking vegetables from Jessica’s plate. Like she used to.

Jessica and Hyoyeon thanked Yuri for the food, rating it five stars with two thumbs up. Yuri was more than happy at their compliments as she smiled shyly at them.

“Aw man, this is my favorite!” Hyoyeon exclaimed as the band played a familiar song.

“Come on, Jess let’s dance! You like this too, right?” She added cheerfully as she stood up from her seat.

“But, Hyo, how about Hyunnie?” Jessica asked the blonde girl who was now holding her wrist.

“Don’t worry, we’ll watch over her.” Yuri smiled at them before nodding.

Hyoyeon said her quick thanks before dragging Jessica to the makeshift dance floor.

Taeyeon watched as Jessica danced with Hyoyeon happily, tilting her head back as she laughed at the blonde who danced like a maniac in front of her. Taeyeon narrowed her eyes at the couple before gulping her glass of beer. Unknown to the group, Seohyun was making her way towards the entrance. Taeyeon immediately rose from her seat as soon as the little girl’s head caught her attention.

“Hey, where are you going?” Taeyeon asked, scooping the girl in her arms but Seohyun squirmed against her grip.

“Hey, calm down it’s just me. Your mommy’s friend.” Taeyeon said, putting Seohyun down.

“Go car?” The little girl asked, pointing at Sooyoung’s car that Jessica and her family rode going to the bar.

“What about the car?” Taeyeon crouched so she was eye to eye with the little girl now.

“My crayon.”

“Oh, your crayons are there? You want me to get them?”

The little girl’s eyes lit up before nodding vigorously.

“Okay. Let’s go.” Taeyeon said, offering a hand to the little girl which Seohyun hesitantly took.

They walked the short distance from the bar to Sooyoung’s car hand in hand in silence.

“It’s locked.” Taeyeon announced with a pout when the car door wouldn’t open.

Seohyun pouted too, before crossing her arms in her chest.

“Don’t worry, we’ll just have to wait for them. Then we’ll get your crayons, okay?” Taeyeon the sulking little girl’s black hair.

“Come let’s sit.” Taeyeon offered her hand to the little girl again before she guided them to the hood of Sooyoung’s car. She lifted Seohyun to sit on the hood first before settling herself beside the little girl.

“What’s your name?” She asked, hands firmly placed on the spot beside Seohyun so the little girl will not fall.

“Me is Seohyun!” The little girl beamed; thumb pointing at her own chest.

“Your name is really nice.” Taeyeon said.

“What's unnie name?” Seohyun asked, tilting her head to look up to Taeyeon.

“I’m Taeyeon. But your mommy calls me Taengoo.” She said proudly, as if the nickname was some national title.

“Tae.. tae.. yoon?” Seohyun said with furrowed brows.

“Taeyeon. But you can call me Taengoo too.”

“Taeng.. goo.” Seohyun said with a smile.

**

“Hello?”

“Baby,”

“Baby, what’s wrong?”

“Nothing. I just missed you.”

“I missed you too."

A pause.

“How are you doing?”

“I’m fine, I’m just bored. Everyone flew to Korea.”

“Everyone?”

“Yeah.”

“How is she doing?”

“She’s fine. She had been coping very well. It was like she wasn’t even heartbroken in the first place.”

“Well, that’s good to hear. How’s my niece?”

“She grew up really well. You should see her, she’s a bright kid.”

There was silence before the caller spoke again.

“Baby?”

“Yes, babe?”

“Thank you. So much. And I’m sorry if it had been hard.”

“Don’t worry about it, okay? I like them, they’re good people. I like her, she’s like the sister I never had.”

“I’m so lucky to have you.”

“Then you should take good care of me.”

A chuckle from the caller had the receiver’s brow rising.

“I will. I promise.”

“I love you.”

“I love you more, jagiya.”