Kai was running through the hall as he tried to look for Sojin. He was supposed to catch up with her if he hadn’t stood by the door as he bowed to two persons arguing inside the room. He stopped by her room as he knocked her door furiously. “Sojin! Sojin! Are you there?” No answer. “I’ll open the door, okay?” Still no answer, but he didn’t waste a second to open it quickly. She wasn’t there, and he started to get more worried, but he instantly knew where she could possibly be beside her room.

He saw her sitting at her favorite purple bean bag chair as she kept a bear closed to her chest. He has never seen that bear before but he’s sure that it used to lie around in that small room. He didn’t say a word as he just sat down next to her as he rubbed her back for comfort. He didn’t asked any question until she calm down and nothing could be heard but the sound of her cries.

She sniffed as she slowly turned to look at him, “Thank you.”

He gave her smile. Not just an ordinary smile but a smile that warms up your whole body and it gives you the care that you just need. That smile. “C’mere!” He said as he opened his arms and she let himself enveloped her by his hug. She feels more safe now and warm.

“Aren’t you going to ask me who that guy was? Or what happened back there?” She sniffed.

“Do you want me to?”

She shook her head as she buried herself into his chest. “Just talk to me when you’re ready.” He said as she nodded. She was lucky to have met a guy such as Jongin. He have this voice that soothes her, the touch that calms her down and his presence that gives her the company she needed right now. And she doesn’t know what she’ll do without him. She can’t live a life without him anymore because he is her life.

After a few hours of comforting her, she calmed herself up as she pulled away from her. She sniffed as she wiped her face by her sleeves. He watched the fragile girl in front of her as he wanted to hug her again and make her feel safe. If he should’ve come earlier then she wouldn’t have watched and hear the whole thing. He suddenly felt guilty and he felt like it was his fault.

“Okay?”

She bit her lip as she smiled at litte, “Okay.”

His ‘smile’ came back again as he fixed her hair. “I look horrible.” She pouted as she fixed it by herself. He laughed at her comment as he held her hand, “You’ll always look beautiful to me,” She hid her flushed face as she playfully hit her arm, “Yah! Don’t cheesy talk me!”

“What? I’m just making you feel better.”

She softly smiled, “Well, I’m better now.”

“Good.”

“Good.”

They both laughed to lighten up the atmosphere but it soon died down when she thought of the reason why they are here in the first place. She looked down as tears started to well up on her eyes.

“That was my dad,” she started off as she looked at him, “he was my first love,” She said and he just sat there, completely frozen, doesn’t know what to do or ask. He was surprised, shocked and curious. She never talks about her dad ever since they met. She didn’t say anything about him. It’s like she doesn’t even have a dad to start with, but in reality, she was abandoned. He awkwardly fixed himself on the chair as he tried to search for a word to say, anything.

“I..I don’t know what to say,” He stammered as he wiped his hands on his denim pants nervously.

“You don’t have to,” she shook her head shamelessly, “I kept it from you when we were together and it ended up being like this, me, running away from  a scene that I could not expect to happen in a million years. I should’ve told you. I..I’m sorry.” She frantically said as she covered her face with both hands. He watched how anxious she looks while talking as he suddenly softens at how vulnerable she looked.

“Hey,” He removed her hand away from her face as she sniffed, trying to hold her feelings or else she’ll look like a total freak in front of him. “Look at me,” He said as he lifted her chin. She shook her head as she looked down, “I can’t.”

He cupped her face and lifted it up. Tears were streaming down her face as he wiped it with his thumb, “Don’t cry. I understand you. I know that you don’t want to tell me how ridiculously your dad is and I understand you.”

“You do?” She hiccupped.

“Yes, I do.”

“Okay, okay. I’m calming down.” She said as she slightly smiled, probably the realest smile she showed this day. It was a little, but real.

“Just tell it to me when you’re ready.” He calmly said as she nodded. “We better go now, your mom must be worried already.” He stood up and patted his pants as he offered her a hand. She held it as he pulled her up. “Thank you,” She said as she kissed his cheek. He was surprised but soon smiled by the kiss she did.

A few days had passed since the little unexpected happening was made and she’s been trying to forget everything that she saw in the office. She tried not to think about it but she just kept zoning out all of a sudden especially when he’s with Jongin. When she saw her so-called ‘dad’, all those memories came rushing in, especially the memory where he left them. He left them just like a piece of trash and the worst part is, he left her when she was in her worst condition. He left her just like that, at the moment where he needed him the most, that’s when he decided to leave and never come back.

He hated him. He hated him so much. Her mom didn’t do anything, she just told her he left and they can perfectly live without him. She thought that her mom was being despicable when she said that but every night she could hear her crying in her office as she sat by the door and sobbed in there. It was hard for the both of them to move on but as years passed by they were back to normal and no one ever talked about him.

But now, it seems like they were back to their nightmare. The nightmare where they  took a lot of strength and courage to escape. How can he just come back when he wants to? How can he so heartless? She hated him more now that she saw him. It would take a lot of time to forgive him..or never.

She never had courage to tell this to Jongin and she will always keep it to herself because she thought that it was not worth sharing especially when it’s about your ty dad who left you all of a sudden who doesn’t even say a one goddamn goodbye. She just wanted to keep it from him for now.

But it seems like he was being bothered by it too. He knows that he shouldn’t pressure her into telling him what it was but a part of him is curious and itching to know about it. To be honest, this keeps him at night when he couldn’t sleep. When he comforted her at that day, he couldn’t help but hold her like a little fragile butterfly. She was just so vulnerable at that time. He just wants to keep her safe and away from anything that could hurt her.

After that day of crying, her mom came to her room and talked to her. She didn’t say much but she knew that her mom is twice as shocked as she is. She just sat beside her bed as she held her hand and kept sighing.

“I’m sorry, Sojin.” She finally said as her voice started to crack.

“Oh, mom,” She said as she hugged her tight in her arms. She started to cry to as she comforted her.

“I should’ve told you. I should’ve—“

“It’s okay, Mom. I understand you.” She quickly said as her mom just nodded.